It’s time to make it a CRIME

SUE CLARKE

MOTHER OF HANNAH CLARKE

My daughter, Hannah, was a beautiful girl, and her three kids, Aaliyah (six), Laianah (four) and Trey (three), were the loves of her life. She tried to put on a positive front for them, but she was dealing with a hidden darkness. In the beginning, it was only little things, but then gradually [her husband] Rowan’s controlling behaviour really started to escalate. Hannah was ready to leave him after Laianah was born, but then she fell pregnant with Trey, and Rowan convinced her she would be a bad mother if she left. He would constantly go through her phone, tracking where she was going, controlling everything. She wasn’t allowed to have a Facebook page or wear shorts to the gym. He would threaten to kill himself, not speak to her for days, and then twist it around and try to make her feel guilty. But for a long time Hannah didn’t realise she was in an abusive relationship. She would say, “But he’s never hit me.” He would say the same thing to us: “I’ve never hit her.” In both their heads, that was the definition of domestic abuse. That’s one of the most important things we want people to understand. We want to educate people on what coercive control looks like so they can identify if it is happening to them. We didn’t know. If we did, maybe we could have saved her and the children. That’s why we set up Small Steps 4 Hannah. We want to do anything we can to prevent other people going through the same pain.

NITHYA REDDY

SISTER OF PRE ETHI REDDY

My big sister, Preethi, was kind, considerate and so smart. She always wanted to take care of people, especially those she loved. The first time I met her murderer, we were at a party. They had met while studying dentistry at university and she’d been dating him for a few months. I remember thinking straight away that he wasn’t for her. My sister was being her social self, mixing with everybody, and he was constantly pulling her back to his side,