Boundaries: When To Say Yes, How to Say No
Written by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
Narrated by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
4.5/5
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About this audiobook
Is your life out of control? Do people take advantage of you? Do you have trouble saying no? Christians often focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limitations. Have you ever found yourself wondering: * Can I set limits and still be a loving person? * What are my legitimate boundaries? * How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? * Why do I feel guilty when I consider setting boundaries? Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend give you biblically based answers to these and other tough questions, showing you how to set healthy boundaries with parents, spouses, children, friends, coworkers, and even with yourself. You’ll see vital principles of boundaries at work as Drs. Cloud and Townsend take you through a day in the life of "Sherrie"--first as she lives with almost no boundaries, then as she begins to apply proper boundaries with others in her life.
Henry Cloud
El doctor Henry Cloud es un conferencista de gran popularidad. Junto al doctor John Townsend es anfitrión del programa de radio New Life Live!, además de ambos ser fundadores de la Clínica Cloud-Townsend y de la organización Cloud-Townsend Resources. Es autor de varios libros premiados con el reconocimiento Medalla de Oro, entre ellos Límites y El poder transformador de los grupos pequeños. El doctor Cloud, su esposa y sus dos hijas radican en el sur de California.
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Reviews for Boundaries
825 ratings84 reviews
- Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5just ok as a book. The concept is simple and straight forward but the book is rather tedious.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5I liked being able to finish it at 2x speed so that I could get through it quickly.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A good friend of mine read this book and recommended it to me. Then coincidentally my son started reading it. So I thought I'd pick it up, not expecting it to be as good as it is! This is probably one of the best books I've read this year. The authors are Christian and come from that orientation, but anyone could read this book and be transformed by its truths. The chapters cover boundary setting in different spheres of life- work, marriage, with children, aging parents, and with oneself. They talk about guilt, and for me one of the most important concepts- owning one's problems. So ( and this is an oversimplification) if you are annoyed by someone's being consistently late- just let him/her know that next time you hope she'll be on time but if not you'll leave w/o her. Whoa! It's so simple, but so few people actually do this! They, including me, will cajole, remind, nag, family members to get ready, hurry up, c'mon, we're going to be late, etc.. Instead of setting a boundary... So.. I tried it with my daughter. And lo and behold.. now she knows I'll leave for the gym w/o her if she's not ready. And guess what? She's prompt now! So... not that this is a magic cure.. but just one simple example of taking control of yourself and letting consequences happen naturally . Love it. I plan to re-read this from time to time. Highly recommend.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5I first read this book in the 1990s, at about the same time I read The Joshua Factor. Cloud and Townsend integrate their psychological and theological understandings in a refreshing manner. It is unashamedly Christian in focus, but that need not deter the non-Christian from taking note of the lessons, and adapting the spiritual aspects to their own faith or spirituality. What I like about the book is the applicability of boundary lessons, especially to areas of one's life that are deeply familial and personal. This is the book's strength, and when combined with the psychological foundations and research, the messages are powerful. I am pleased to have re-read this book, and the timing was perfect. The quote I wrote down over and over again while reading this was "Own the problem" (p. 207). And Proverbs 19:3 kept coming back to me: "The foolishness of man twists his way, and his heart frets against the Lord" (NKJV). If the non-Christian reader can identify with the philosophical and spiritual bases drawn upon in the book, there is much wisdom to be gained. A work well worth reading as part of one's end-of-year reflection.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances -- Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions -- Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others -- Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator -- Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask: - Can I set limits and still be a loving person? - What are legitimate boundaries? - What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries? - How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? - Aren't boundaries selfish? - Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries? Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer biblically-based answers to these and other tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Front row placement on my bookshelves, so I can refer to it often. This book is beautifully written, with scriptural and historical data to explain and clarify sociological expectations and create more functional relations.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Excellent book! I last read it years ago and I really wish I had reread it sooner. I highly recommend reading this book at least every couple of years.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Good book Thank you.Highly recommend. I will work on my boundaries and saying No
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The best book ever I'm so grateful for the lessons I gained on setting boundaries.
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5A book which is not adding value for business point of view. To many quotes for jesus and church and family( husband and wife) …. Little time waste? Sorry to say that
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Highly recommend, I have poor set boundaries and this also helps us understand why.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Insightful book , I hope to learn more about my boundaries
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Very insightful. It helped me to understand my life and how to manage it.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5synezze/sails legitimateissue kasper skay issue me credit card i love you so much like never see any one before god says thats wil not live the one who love him safe rule and regulation.t-1294-3320-887-3
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5short but powerful, a lot of inner healing, self control and awareness of self in this book.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I need to share this with my family ASAP they need to understand a few things
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This book is interesting and insightful! It really made me realize alot of the ways I can set healthy boundaries for myself and that its an important thing to do.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Wow! Great book. It's snappy, simple and rich in setting boundaries and maintaining family ties and relationships outside the home front. Check it out and confirm yourself!
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Just brilliant!!! A must have for anyone struggling with being assertive!
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5It's clear and relevant I really enjoyed listening to the audio book
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5This book is very well written, i loved every minute of it.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I had a good experience, didn't know much about this
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Good until it hit the religion string, at least for me, instead of it empowering you it empowers the power of god over you and how you were created to have boundaries. Good but not for everyone
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Good read. Not what I expected but good anyway. I'll recommend.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I liked it. Not too long go straight to the point.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5One of the best books I've ever listened to. To think I am at a point in my life where I needed such motivation and push, God sent this book to me just at the right time and for the right reason. I want to listen to it over and over and over again. I have also learnt to look at the beatitudes in a completely different light. I saw my life flash before my eyes and God opened up every door of doubt and regret with proper revelations and teachings. Many thanks to these authors and special thanks to Scribd. Downloading this app is one of the best things I've done in 2022.
- Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5Too Christian for my tastes. The messages are largely good, but drowned by all the talk of what God wants.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Get your pen and paper ready. Good information To write down.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A Sound and helpful book. Much needed in our everyday relationships
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5It is nice to heard a book of boundaries with the Cristian believes.