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    The Amateur Marriage: A Novel
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    The Amateur Marriage: A Novel
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    The Amateur Marriage: A Novel
    Audiobook10 hours

    The Amateur Marriage: A Novel

    Written by Anne Tyler

    Narrated by Blair Brown

    3.5/5

    ()

    Currently unavailable

    Currently unavailable

    About this audiobook

    From the inimitable Anne Tyler, a rich and compelling novel about a mismatched marriage—and its consequences, spanning three generations.

    They seemed like the perfect couple—young, good-looking, made for each other. The moment Pauline, a stranger to the Polish Eastern Avenue neighborhood of Baltimore (though she lived only twenty minutes away), walked into his mother's grocery store, Michael was smitten. And in the heat of World War II fervor, they are propelled into a hasty wedding. But they never should have married.

    Pauline, impulsive, impractical, tumbles hit-or-miss through life; Michael, plodding, cautious, judgmental, proceeds deliberately. While other young marrieds, equally ignorant at the start, seemed to grow more seasoned, Pauline and Michael remain amateurs. In time their foolish quarrels take their toll. Even when they find themselves, almost thirty years later, loving, instant parents to a little grandson named Pagan, whom they rescue from Haight-Ashbury, they still cannot bridge their deep-rooted differences. Flighty Pauline clings to the notion that the rifts can always be patched. To the unyielding Michael, they become unbearable.

    From the sound of the cash register in the old grocery to the counterculture jargon of the sixties, from the miniskirts to the multilayered apparel of later years, Anne Tyler captures the evocative nuances of everyday life during these decades with such telling precision that every page brings smiles of recognition. Throughout, as each of the competing voices bears witness, we are drawn ever more fully into the complex entanglements of family life in this wise, embracing, and deeply perceptive novel.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherPenguin Random House Audio
    Release dateJan 6, 2004
    ISBN9780739310434
    Unavailable
    The Amateur Marriage: A Novel

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    Reviews for The Amateur Marriage

    3.5/5

    777 ratings47 reviews

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    • 3/5
      Depressing.
    • 3/5
      (via Goodreads)It has been awhile since I wrote a book review. Writing reviews was my escape from course work and the slog of writing my dissertation. Well, dissertation complete, properly hooded, and trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life (for now, I chose not to enter academia), I found creating a new life takes a tremendous amount of time, worry, fear, and instability. I often felt like I was fast approaching the edge of a cliff, and, no matter how hard I fought to turn and run the other direction, the edge kept coming closer and closer. I continued to read, but with no stomach for pushing myself to use my voice...a uncertain voice that kept squeaking with frustration and potential failure. To my profound surprise, once I peeked over the edge of the cliff I discovered the drop was only a few, manageable feet. I believe I scrambled safely down the side of the unknown finding solid footing within a pleasant valley. What has any of my story have to do with a review of "The Amateur Marriage"? Well, having never been married I feel my scramble down the cliff was as close as I can get to relating to Michael and Pauline - two WWII era kids who jump off a cliff into marriage and spend a great deal of time, worry, fear, and instability in an effort to come to a feeling of solid footing. And that search toward reliability is the best I can do in terms of a fair and supportive review for this book.Look, I realize I've no idea what I am talking about when I talk about a good marriage never having been in any marriage. Yet, I feel I have been around enough people to get an idea of what a good, mediocre, or bad relationship looks like. The relationship of Michael and Pauline Anton is (was?) a bad relationship. I found myself getting so mad at the characters for simply not learning to be friends, blinded by their enormous striving to "be married" within ideas of what a marriage should be (both individuals holding different ideas of marriage, ideas they never shared with each other, choosing to push each other to frustration and anger). And, do not get me started on the topic of Lindy! The result was an aggravating story that brought me too much discomfort for much empathy. And yet, the lack of empathy I felt, the overwhelming sense of frustration at the story, is perhaps the best compliment to the author, Anne Tyler. Taking a step out of the story, I realize Tyler brought me into the story completely - solid footing within the pleasant literary valley. I do not know if there is a better compliment to an author. Is there one? I lost myself in the frustrated lives of Michael and Pauline. That is good storytelling and why Tyler is a Pulitzer Prize winning author.
    • 4/5
      Though I have several Anne Tyler books on my shelf, this is the first of hers that I've read thus far, so I can't compare it to others. It seems that Tyler has a large group of devoted fans who really appreciate her writing, after reading some Amazon reviews. While I wasn't blown away by this book, I appreciated Tyler's ability to keep the story interesting & the reader engrossed in a storyline that in itself might seem rather dull, but yet really hit the mark as far as what I think many marriages really are like. I had trouble liking Pauline, and then more toward the end, Michael was less likeable as well. But having said that, I also felt like I saw a lot of myself in Pauline, which makes me take a second look at the impression I may be giving others of myself. Sadly enough, I felt like I related fairly well to the story of Michael & Pauline's marriage, and that does indeed make me sad. While I enjoyed the fact that this book covered many years of a couple's marriage, the unwritten "gaps" between chapters unsettled me sometimes & made me want to know what really happened during those missing years. And I have to say I thought the last fifth or so of the book was disappointing. I felt like Tyler tried to wrap things up almost too quickly, although not necessarily tidily.
    • 4/5
      Having been disappointed by two much earlier books by this author(The Tin Can Tree and The Clock Winder) I was much taken with this novel and raced through it.I liked the way Tyler avoids the obvious in the plotting: just as we think 'x' is going to happen we find it's 'y'. Underneath the seeming mundanity of the marriage of the title there are the frictions and 'battles' that, for me, were engrossing. There are sudden turns and twists that enliven the narrative . Tyler is wise and perspicacious:such a good observer of the ordinary life that somehow it ends up extraordinary.
    • 3/5
      A deep look at what makes a marriage and how easy it is to jump in without thinking. Written in the third person, I found the story hard to get into and kept hoping it would pick up; it did, but I still felt like an outsider looking in on the Anton's marriage and life. Perhaps that is what Ms. Tyler intended.
    • 5/5
      From the very beginning, everyone who knew Michael and Pauline could tell that they were absolutely meant to be together. As a couple, they seemed to be perfectly matched: young, good-looking, made for each other. As a matter of fact, their first meeting with each other seemed to be almost like a scene from a romantic novel or some old Hollywood movie. The moment Pauline - a stranger to the Polish neighborhood of Eastern Avenue in Baltimore, even though she lived only twenty minutes away - walked into his mother's grocery store, Michael is completely smitten. Pauline steps into the store as a damsel in distress, and Michael becomes her hero. And in the heat of World War II fervor, they are propelled into a hasty marriage. Yet, this is definitely a couple who never should have married.Pauline, impulsive and impractical, tumbles headlong through life and takes to marriage in a relatively hit-or-miss fashion. Michael, serious and deliberate all throughout his life, proceeds into marriage in exactly the same precise and measured way - dealing with Pauline and her various issues in a fairly judgemental and predictable fashion. And, in time - while other young married couples who were equally as inept from the beginning seemed to grow more seasoned and settled in their own marriages - both Michael and Pauline remained amateurs. Over time, the couple's foolish and petty quarrels inevitably take their toll.Even when they find themselves - almost three decades later - loving, instant parents to their little three-year-old grandson named Pagan, whom they rescue from Haight-Ashbury, Michael and Pauline still seem unable to bridge the cavernous distance created by their deep-rooted differences. For flighty Pauline - who clings to the notion that given enough time, all things wrong can be made right again - the rifts in their marriage can always be patched. Yet to the unyielding Michael, their differences have become unbearable.I must say that I absolutely loved reading this book. In my opinion, Anne Tyler is thoughtful and measured in her writing style; deeply invested in the development of her characters and plots. She is actually a tremendous writer.I am always amazed at how easily I can get lost in her stories. To me, they never seem forced or disjointed. This book was equally as easy to read and to get lost in; there was a poignancy and a realistic quality to this plot that I thoroughly enjoyed. I give this book an A+!
    • 4/5
      This is much more pessimistic and darker in tone than her previous novels, but it is a post-September 11th book and it seems to me that she has reached a new level, much as Philip Roth in his later novels. She brings her experience, maturity and exceptional writing talent to bear on the story of the lengthily disintegrating marriage of Michael and Pauline, two people whose love for each other is exceeded only by their incompatibility. With infinite skill and understanding she traces their lives from their meeting just after the attack on Pearl Harbour until the first Pearl Harbour day after the attack on the World Trade Centre. She also manages to describe various sections of Baltimore and San Francisco societies during that period with an unerring feel for the domestic details of the day. This is the work of a great writer in her prime-don't miss it.
    • 4/5
      Anne Tyler's writing is always enjoyable to read. Love the details. This story could be many families: there's the one who drives everyone crazy, the one who attends to the details of life and is dependable, the one who is emotional over everything....you get the idea. The parents wind up with a grandchild to raise and there's a divorce -- the usual things people deal with these days. This is a particular story, though, as each of our families are.
    • 4/5
      Such unhappy people - don't think I liked any of them.. The structure of the novel was good - both sides points of view. glad she skipped over some of the major events - made for a shorter book to cover 60 years of family saga.
    • 4/5
      Very good book. Characters so real, you feel they are your life-long friends. Interesting insights into what a marriage does to the children of that marriage. Best Anne Tyler I've read.
    • 2/5
      I kept waiting for something more to happen in this story. It was difficult to plow through, but I kept on thinking, there's got to be more. There wasn't.
    • 3/5
      I hadn't read any Anne Tyler in a while, but kept coming across her name as I was reading Nick Hornby's Polysyllabic Spree. I'd forgotten how good her stuff is. Such tender writing, especially when revealing the painful weak spots in personal lives.
    • 5/5
      I love those of Ann Tyler's novels that follow this formula, with different chapters being presented from the perspective of different characters as the plot unfolds.
    • 3/5
      Interesting cast of characters. Michael and Pauline get married but you don't ever really feel like they loved each other. I remember feeling very annoyed with Pauline by the end of the story!
    • 4/5
      In the 1940's, Michael and Pauline get married but are very different from each other. The book follows the couple through their lives. They have 3 children, the oldest one disappears and Michael and Pauline end up raising that daughter's child.
    • 4/5
      No big plot here. Just a family, living life. Surprisingly gratifying and enchanting. Michael and Pauline meet just when America is entering the second world war. They fall in love, marry, have children, and then wonder why they marry. They have so much sturm and drang in their relationship that you almost cheer when Michael leaves. Once he does though, you miss them together, you miss their dynamic, and by the end of the novel, you know that they always loved each other. The characters are all so human, so lovable, foibles and all. I really enjoyed this book.
    • 3/5
      If you are looking ahead to 14 hours on an airplane, any book by Anne Tyler is a winner. They are interesting, fun, quirky, and easy to read when you are half asleep. But that said, this is not one of my favorites. If you have a choice, pick up Back When We Were Grownups instead of this one. That's the book where I think she got this story right.
    • 4/5
      Sympathetic portrait of a poorly matched couple who never manage to bridge the gap between them. Despite their good-faith efforts, they remain incomprehensible to each other, over decades of marriage. Along with insights about marriage, Tyler offers an evocative glimpse of small town life in Post-WW II America.
    • 5/5
      In this novel by Anne Tyler two attractive young people rush into marriage at the beginning of World War II. Over the years they experience the same things as their friends but can't seem to mend differences unlike other couples. When they finally move to an upscale neighborhood only Pauline (the wife) is happy; Michael misses his friends and the area where he grew up. Too soon they find themselves responsible for a grandchild but instead of this drawing them closer it broadens the gap between them. A return trip to the old neighborhood some thirty years later finally convinces Michael that you can't go home to the same things you once knew. In this book author Anne Tyler rounds out her characters with such depth that this reader felt on an intimate basis with them. While the story touches on everyday aspects that everyone will recognize, the characters are sure to evoke a sense of rightness with the way they are brought to life. A pleasure to read.
    • 2/5
      I thought to read another Anne Tyler book as I enjoyed Digging to America earlier this year. I listened to the downloadable audio version of this one (but this is the closest record I can find). It was interesting enough to finish, but I didn't care for the style as much as Digging, and I didn't care for either of the main characters, they were both just annoying -- especially the wife. So it wasn't a favorite.
    • 3/5
      I like to read Anne Tyler but I don't really know why. I find all of her books, as I did this one, deeply depressing and she seems to apply a certain kind of futility to the lives of her characters. They go through their lives doing what they think they should be doing but with no zest for or real love of life, just sort of plodding along. I guess her books are too close to what life truly is for most of us and I find that rather bleak. One likes to think that the world at large is full of happy people and to think that "one day I will be there too" sort of philosophy. But is life really all happiness and light? It is not and Anne Tyler writes about those lives with a style all her own and I continue to read her so I guess I appreciate her writing. I will continue to read her for I do find her work fascinating though depressing. Perhaps I will throw in a fairy tale now and then to cheer myself up in between.
    • 4/5
      This is a book I will definitely read again someday. When thinking about this review I wanted to box this story into a corner and call it a sad book, but I couldn't. It's such an accurate portrait of how a marriage (and ultimately, a life) can end up that I can't just call it "sad." How can I when it's beautiful, funny, tragic, infuriating, intelligent, frightening and honest all at the same time?Michael and Pauline are two teenagers whose lives collide at the start of World War II. Their romance is the result of a marriage between a fear of the future and the desire to be someone else at that very instant. Michael wants a girlfriend, any girlfriend. Sensing Pauline's fascination with the war effort he spontaneously enlists. Pauline wants a soldier for a boyfriend. Any soldier. The culture and uncertainly of the times have thrown these two people together in such a way that neither of them can back out, despite the growing realization they were never meant to be together.One things leads to another and soon thirty years have gone by. Pauline and Michael divorce and life goes on. And on. While the marriage didn't survive more than halfway through the novel, Michael and Pauline go on. Their relationship from beginning to end and beyond is captured beautifully.
    • 3/5
      I liked it in an interesting way. It was sort of a slow soap opera. You never knew what would happen. I didn't like that she skipped around so much in the time frames. Each chapter could be 5-10 yrs from the other. The lesson was great though. That even if you feel your marriage isn't right, real, etc, you can still love that person forever. Doesn't mean also that you nec. should marry.5/8/04
    • 5/5
      Pauleen and Michael meet in the heady days after pearl harbor and marry a while later in a similar blur. The strength of this domestic tale is how well the characters are captured. The narrative follows the two for the next 50 years, through the running away of their daughter and the disintegration of their marriage. I did this as an audio book (read by the excellent blair brown) and found myself cringing at the dialog, not because it was bad but because it was so real and I wanted the characters to be less cruel to one another. While this is not a happy book, it is a sobering one, which led me to think about my own relationship and relate strongly to mike and pauleen.
    • 4/5
      I was a big fan of Tyler's earlier books, then lost interest. This is the first one I've liked in a while--about a girl and boy from different backgrounds who fall in love and marry during World War II, have three children, move to the suburbs and eventually split up. As usual, Tyler creates a wonderful background with the Baltimore setting.There are so many wonderfully observed moments and, as usual, I love the Baltimore setting.
    • 3/5
      This is the second Anne Tyler book I've read, and the second disappointment. She writes along the types of themes that I tend to like, but this book had me impatient and kind of grumpy.Not that I expected it to be uplifting--it's the story of an unhappy marriage, after all. But I kept wishing for something to hold onto, some thread to pull me through the story and tie it all together and help me make sense of it, and that thread was missing. Often this thread is the primary characters, but Michael and Pauline left me at a loss much of the time. The secondary characters lacked depth--Michael and Pauline's children and grandchildren float in and out of the storyline and by the time you've figured out how old they are in ten years have gone by and they seem like completely different people. A daughter runs away and we don't know her well enough to care whether she's coming back. A grandson who lives with the main characters and is very important to both of them, is like a shadow that crosses through the prose here and there--the segment in which he speaks the most is the one in which he's pulling away. The climactic moment when they all come back together again shows the main characters at the periphery if at all--we're supposed to care how these characters we hardly know react to each other?I will admit, too, that I'm not crazy about lifespan books. Some authors love to follow characters through until the end of their lives but I like to be left with a little lift, a moment to wonder what will happen next. This book left me with nothing but relief that it was over.
    • 5/5
      Ah, it's the classic story: Boy meets Girl, Boy marries Girl, Boy and Girl have a family, Boy and Girl spend thirty years questioning their decisions and wondering why they ever married each other.Okay, maybe it's not a classic love story, but it does serve as the basis for Anne Tyler's novel The Amateur Marriage. It's the story of a couple who fell in love shortly after Pearl Harbor and did what all young couples did back then, they got married and started a family. Friends and family see them as the perfect couple - an example of opposites (he rational and introverted, she flighty and extroverted) attracting, but their differences often cause arguments and doubt. Do other seemingly "normal" couples have these same doubts?The book takes you completely through their story, from the 1940's to present day, sometimes in his voice, sometimes hers (and later from a grown son's point of view). As the decades roll by the book stops at major events in the life of this family and their impact on an already precarious relationship.While there's no doubting that this is an Anne Tyler novel (Baltimore setting, family story, dead-on dialog), the almost total lack of optimism kind of threw me. No matter how bad things got in other stories of hers, like Breathing Lessons, Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant, and The Accidental Tourist, there was always hope, but for most of this book you don't feel hopeful. Those novels also had their moments of humor, something else that is missing from The Amateur Marriage.And yet this novel is a good read not in spite of what it's lacking, but because of it. It's the story of two people who probably should have never gotten married, and that's not very hopeful or humorous. So it's not a happy story, but that doesn't mean it's not an interesting one. Tyler spends most of the time inside these people's heads and does a fantastic job getting both side's thoughts. You never blame one spouse over the other because neither is completely bad or completely good, they're just wrong for each other. It's not an easy story to tell, but I think Tyler does a good job tackling a tough subject.
    • 5/5
      One of Anne Tyler's best books!!! Michael and Pauline get married during excitement and frenzy of WWII. These are two people that, had they met at another time, would not have ended up together . As always Tyler writes about most painful and funny aspects of marriage between Michael and Pauline is such a heart wrenching way that you can't help but feel sorry for them both.
    • 3/5
      A little less dysfunctional than Anne's earlier books--which is a relief. Love the Baltimore familiar background--always a comfort.
    • 3/5
      Tyler's characters are so easy to identify with. The way the novel moves throughout time and jumps to various perspectives is interesting and makes the work seem very intimate. A sense of separation prevails as the characters combat each new challenge. A very moving novel.