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    Grieving the Loss of a Loved One: A Devotional of Hope
    Grieving the Loss of a Loved One: A Devotional of Hope
    Grieving the Loss of a Loved One: A Devotional of Hope
    Ebook324 pages2 hours

    Grieving the Loss of a Loved One: A Devotional of Hope

    By Kathe Wunnenberg

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    About this ebook

    Death is an inevitable and constant part of life, yet those who grieve often feel misunderstood and alone in their journey, says Kathe Wunnenberg, author of Grieving the Loss of a Loved One. This compassionate book acts as a daily devotional companion to hurting people. Designed for adult readers of all ages and stages in the grieving process, it is sensitively written by an author who suffered three miscarriages and the death of an infant son. She knows from firsthand experience that there are no easy answers for those who mourn. Sixty devotions cover the many stages of grieving, including readings for holidays, birthdays, and special occasions, when grief can be particularly painful. Readers will walk away from the short thematic devotions and feel validated, connected to someone who knows how they truly feel, and with renewed hope in God. Friends and family members who sincerely want to help the grieving can give this book as a meaningful, beneficial expression of their love and concern.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherZondervan
    Release dateDec 22, 2009
    ISBN9780310862345
    Author

    Kathe Wunnenberg

    Kathe Wunnenberg is the founder and president of Hopelifters Unlimited. She is a speaker, writer, leader, and connector known for her ability to offer creative solutions for real life problems. The author of Grieving the Loss of a Loved One and Grieving the Child I Never Knew, Kathe lives in Phoenix, Arizona, with her family.  Connect with Kathe at www.hopelifters.com

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      Book preview

      Grieving the Loss of a Loved One - Kathe Wunnenberg

      Also by Kathe Wunnenberg

      Grieving the Child I Never Knew

      Longing for a Child

      ZONDERVAN

      Grieving the Loss of a Loved One

      Copyright © 2000 by Kathe Wunnenberg

      All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of Zondervan.

      ePub Edition June 2009 ISBN 0-310-86234-5

      Requests for information should be addressed to:

      Zondervan, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530

      ISBN-10: 0-310-22778-X

      ISBN-13: 978-0-310-22778-6

      Most Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

      Other Scripture quotations are from The Living Bible (TLB) © 1971 by Tyndale House Publishers.

      All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other—except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.

      Interior design by Laura Klynstra Blost

      With love and gratitude to my husband, Rich Wunnenberg. You inspired me through your own grief journey to trust God.

      Thank you for being my life partner, best friend, encourager, a shoulder I could cry on, and a candle to light my darkest moments. You are a true reflection of Christ to me.

      And to all those who are journeying through their own grief.

      You keep me motivated to press on in spite of my pain.

      CONTENTS

      Title Page

      Copyright Page

      Acknowledgments

      Readings for Special Days or Needs

      Your Journey Through Grief

      SECTION 1: DENYING

      1. Journey Through the Fog to Reality

      2. Out of the Gray Zone

      3. Grief Mirage

      4. Sailing to the Iceberg of Denial

      5. Truth or Denial?

      SECTION 2: VENTING

      6. Journey to the Volcano of Anger

      7. Journey from Envy to Admiration

      8. Journey to Still Water

      9. Hidden Longings

      10. Jetty of Calm

      SECTION 3: QUESTIONING

      11. Wandering Through the Wilderness of Why

      12. The Mystery of Death’s Timing

      13. Stranded on If Only Island

      14. Why Not Me?

      15. From Tragedy to Triumph

      SECTION 4: BARGAINING

      16. Journey to the Marketplace of Bargaining

      17. Father Knows Best

      18. God Delivered More Than I Bargained For

      19. Let’s Make a Deal

      20. Bargaining with Uncertainty About Your Loved One’s Eternal Future

      SECTION 5: CRYING

      21. Facing the Flash Floods of Tears

      22. Happy-Sad Tears

      23. Remembering Tears

      24. Others’ Tears

      25. Growing Tears

      SECTION 6: SURRENDERING

      26. Journey into the Fire of Surrender

      27. Running from God

      28. Required Courses

      29. On the Other Side of However

      30. Receiving a Lift Is a Gift

      SECTION 7: ACCEPTING

      31. Seated at the Table of Acceptance

      32. New Clothes

      33. Lighten Up!

      34. A Tissue and a Candle

      35. I’ll Do It

      SECTION 8: PRAISING

      36. The Pathway Through Pain

      37. Mountain Mover

      38. Pain Producing Praise

      39. Deep Roots

      40. Journey to the Schoolhouse of Praise

      SECTION 9: BEING

      41. Being with the Shepherd

      42. Being in the Darkness

      43. Slow Down and Detour to the School of Being

      44. Journey to the Cocoon of Being

      45. Enjoy the Now

      SECTION 10: CELEBRATING

      46. Celebrate Your Framed Memories

      47. The Memory Box

      48. A Trophy to Remember

      49. Remember, Yet Celebrate!

      50. Journey from Winter to Springtime

      SECTION 11: RELATING

      51. Landscaping Loss into Your Life

      52. Grief Mentor

      53. Connecting Through Loss

      54. Expect the Unexpected

      55. Journey to the Pond of Relating

      SECTION 12: LIVING

      56. Journey to the Lighthouse of Living

      57. Living with New Roles and Expectations

      58. Being Thankful Is in Order

      59. Living Beyond the No

      60. Living in the Father’s Arms

      Suggested Resources

      Support Organizations

      About the Publisher

      Share Your Thoughts

      ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

      WRITING A BOOK IS a lot like trying to have a baby. It may happen easily or never, or it may take years. While this project came together, I was in the process of grieving the loss of my son and recovering from two miscarriages. I was on a physical, emotional, and spiritual roller coaster. I didn’t know if I would have the endurance or stamina to deliver the project.

      Then I discovered I was pregnant again. I panicked. I felt I didn’t need more illustrations about loss. I had to trust God and not lean on my own understanding. As my waistline disappeared and my deadline approached, my fax machine, e-mail, phone, and mailbox became flooded with insights from people who had lost loved ones. They affirmed the need for this book. They gave me the courage to labor on and to stay focused on the outcome of changing lives.

      This project has enlarged my soul and stretched me beyond my limits. It has unleashed my passion to provide hope to the hurting and to proclaim the good news of God’s faithfulness. I am amazed as I bend over my six-month bulging belly to look at my completed manuscript, ready to be delivered into my editor’s hands. It has been a long and intense labor of love that I could have never completed without the support of many people. May this baby produce fruit and multiply God’s kingdom. I salute my co-laborers:

      The Zondervan Publishing Team

      Thank you for believing in me and seeing the potential in this project. I deeply appreciate your creative staff, commitment to excellence, encouragement, and prayers.

      Ann Spangler, you’re a great senior acquisitions editor and encourager! You see beyond conception. Your ability, flexibility, and sensitivity made it a less painful labor.

      Janet Kobobel Grant, you’re a great editing coach who helped me to breathe to the finish! Thanks for your insights and heart for this project.

      Verlyn Verbrugge, thanks for your finishing touches.

      The Contributors

      Thanks to those who provided me with valuable feedback from my questionnaire and with personal insights and stories about your losses. I received many moving stories but could share only a portion of them in this book.

      Thanks to my mom, Alice Stephens, for keeping the faxes coming with research, ideas, and verses. Thanks, Mom, for your love and prayers and for being my biggest cheerleader through the years.

      The PIT Team (Personal Intercessory Team)

      Thanks to forty-six of you throughout the United States and Canada for laboring on your knees for this project and me. You helped carry me through to completion! I hope you’ll continue through the next book. If I had to choose between Pitosin and prayer, prayer delivers!

      The Mentors

      Thanks to John McAdam, who instilled the dream to write; the University of Missouri’s journalism school, which sharpened my skill; Carol Kent, who saw my potential as a Christian communicator, cheered me on, and published my story in her book; Judy Couchman, for modeling perseverance as a writer, for teaching me, and for connecting me with Ann Spangler; Traci Mullins, for reading my proposal; The Vision Group, for coming alongside me with support and encouragement; Dottie Escabedo-Frank and Margie Erbe, for being my grief mentors.

      The Up-Close-and-Personal Local Team

      Rich Wunnenberg, my husband, best friend, technical support, encourager, and grief mentor, thank you for helping me to fulfill my dream of being pregnant and writing a book and for sharing the labor with me by listening to me read every story aloud.

      Jake Wunnenberg, you’re a terrific son, who is sensitive to my needs and gives great hugs! Thanks for sharing picnics at the cemetery and happy-sad tears with me.

      Lisa Jernigan and Jan James for being Jesus-with-skin-on friends, who walked with me through the fire of my losses. Thanks for loving me unconditionally and just being there.

      Christian Business Women’s Association for reflecting Christ to me.

      Mountain Park Community Church for your meals and love in action.

      Jesus Christ, You are the great physician and true deliverer of this project. Nothing is impossible with You. Thanks for being my Lord and Savior.

      READING FOR SPECIAL DAYS OR NEEDS

      SPECIAL OCCASIONS, HOLIDAYS, AND personal circumstances may trigger your grief and expose a new dimension of living life without your loved one. When you encounter these times in your journey and desire encouragement or a fresh perspective, turn to the selected reading for that specific day or need.

      New Year’s Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .219

      Valentine’s Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .201

      Veterans’ Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .102

      Good Friday . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .66

      Easter Sunday . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .137

      Graduation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .116

      Back to School . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .158

      Anniversary . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .49, 96

      Birthdays . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .119, 185

      Mother’s Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .42

      Father’s Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .78, 232

      Weddings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .194

      Thanksgiving . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .225

      Christmas . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .188, 229

      Loss of a Grandchild . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .60

      Children Who Grieve . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .57, 96, 191

      Men Who Grieve . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .27, 39, 99, 130, 194, 222

      Moving, Transitions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 111, 130, 179, 222

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