Rich People Are Making Us Fat: How to stay thin without dieting

Rich People Are Making Us Fat:

How To Stay Thin Without Dieting

By Robert Doyle with help from Jane Doyle, Alex Doyle, and Pat Doyle

Copyright 2012 Robert Doyle

Smashwords Edition

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the author.

* * *

Rich People Are Making Us Fat.

We know what you're thinking. You're thinking,

Why would rich people want to make me fat?

We didn't say they wanted to make us fat.

They don't want to do anything with us.

In fact, they don't care about us at all.

You know what rich people do care about?

Being rich.

And the stuff that makes them rich makes us fat.

* * *

Table of Contents

Introduction

How Our Bodies Work

Beauty Is Making Us Fat

Our Cars Are Making Us Fat

Supermarkets Are Making Us Fat

Fast Food Is Making Us Fat

Diets Are Making Us Fat

Health Food Is Making Us Fat

Farmers Are Making Us Fat

Why We Want To Be Skinny

What The Heck Are Skinny People Doing?

Red Wine and Street Gangs

We Hate Food Snobs

They Don't Eat Low Fat

They Get Enough Sleep

They Drink Soda

They Don’t Skip Meals

They Don't Eat Too Quickly

They Watch Less Television

They Don't Face The Buffet

They Eat From Smaller Plates

They Don't Put All The Food On The Table

They Take Smaller Bites

They Drink More Water

They Don't Have Overweight Friends

They Don't Eat Too Late

They Don't Drink Healthy Drinks

They Don't Eat Because They're Emotional

They Eat Whatever They Want

They Walk More

They Eat As Much As They Want

* * *

Introduction

Before we start talking about how rich people are making us fat or how you can stay thin, we want to clear something up: This is not a diet book. There's no diet in here. You won't see page after page of foods that are labeled good or bad. There's no list of foods along with their nutritional information, fat content, or calories like you find in every diet book on the market. You also won't find any recipes in here, or instructions about what you should eat and when you should eat and how much you should eat.

Okay, so now you’re thinking, What the heck is in this stupid book then? That’s a good question. We’re glad you asked.

Here’s a simple fact: At every point in human history, there have been people who have been able to eat whatever they want, whenever they want, and as much as they want, and they never get fat. There are people like that today. We’ve seen them. They’re never on a diet. They can eat fast food and not get fat. They can eat sugar and carbs and not get fat. They eat desserts and don’t get fat. They eat fried foods, fatty foods, and foods loaded with cholesterol, and they don’t get fat or have heart problems. They never go to the gym and they don’t jog but still, they don’t get fat. We see these people and think, Man, they’re so lucky.

But they’re not lucky. They didn’t win some genetic lottery. They weren’t born different from the rest of us. We’re all the same. It’s just that they do a few things that the rest of us don’t do, and it’s those few things that make all the difference. This book is going to show you what those things are and help you to do them, so you can be one of those people.

The reason we don’t have any of the traditional diet book stuff in here is simple: It doesn’t work. Look, there are literally thousands of diet books on the market right now, this very second, and they all tell you what to eat and what not to eat, which nobody wants to hear. They all give lists of foods along with nutritional values, which nobody wants to read. And they're all filled with recipes, which nobody wants to make. Americans spend 40 billion dollars a year on diets. 40 billion dollars. If these diets were working, we'd all be thin, but we're not thin. We're not even getting thinner. We're getting fatter. Americans are heavier now than they have ever been, and every year Americans get heavier. The only people who manage to actually stay thin are the ones not dieting. Face it. The diets just don't work.

Sure, people lose weight when they stay on the diet, but they don't stay on the diet, and when they go off the diet, they put back all the weight and then some. And sooner or later everyone goes off the diet because what kind of lunatic wants to live their entire life on a diet?

We want to be thin, though, so we keep on dieting, right? After all, what else is there to do? How else could we possibly lose weight?

We're about to tell you, but first, since you brought it up, we're going to tell you how to catch a monkey. (Yes, we know you didn't really bring it up, but it was a pretty difficult transition to make, going from diets to monkeys. Cut us some slack. It will make sense when we're done.)

Anyway, monkeys are not the easiest animals in the world to catch because they're little and fast and smart. So how do you catch a monkey? It's not all that difficult if you understand how they think. All you have to do is find something irresistible to monkeys. The natives who live in places where there are lots of monkeys use a plant called a bottle gourd. Basically a bottle gourd is a fruit that if you let it stay on the vine until it matures, will have a hardened outer skin that's a lot like wood. They're really durable. You can actually use one as a bottle, thus the name. The natives take a mature bottle gourde and they drill a small hole in the side of it, just big enough for a monkey’s hand. They put something shiny inside then they tie the bottle gourd to the ground or to a tree. Then they leave.

Pretty soon monkeys who were watching them put the bottle gourd on the ground will come to investigate. They're incredibly curious. When they get down to the ground and check out the bottle gourd they discover that there's something shiny in it. This is very exciting for a monkey, so he will squeeze his little hand inside the hole in the bottle gourd and grab the shiny thing.

Here's the problem: When he tries to take his hand out, it won't fit. See, he's making a fist, trying to hold onto his little prize, and his fist is too big to fit through the hole. Monkeys have some serious anger management issues, and this is just the kind of thing that really sets them off. He will start to do that thing that monkeys do where they hop around all angry and scream. When the natives hear the screaming, angry little monkey they stroll back to their trap. They don’t hurry because they know the monkey will still be there, and sure enough, there he is, with his hand still in the bottle gourd.

The monkey sees the humans and freaks out even more. He hops around more frantically and screams even louder. Know what he doesn't do? He doesn't take his hand out of the bottle gourd. He won't because to take his hand out would mean letting go of what’s inside. There's no way he's doing that. So, the humans walk over and pick up the little rope that is tied to the bottle gourd and they reel in the monkey, like fishing for monkeys.

That's stupid, you're thinking. All he has to do is let go. That's true. All he has to do is take his little monkey hand out of the gourd and he'd be home free, but he won't. He's bouncing around like a – well, like a monkey, but he's not ever letting go. And that is how you catch a monkey.

Now we told that story because when it comes to diets, we're exactly like that monkey. We just won't let go of them. It doesn't matter how bad our situation is, how often we see that dieting doesn't work, in our desperation we will do almost anything, except of course, stop dieting. We just won’t let go of the shiny thing. And the longer we do this, the crazier we become, the more insane we are willing to be because we keep gaining weight. Eventually we're willing to try diets that we would have laughed at a few years before.

Just how crazy have we become? Here are a few examples:

The Tape Worm Diet. Really? We're going to put a live tape worm inside our bodies so that it can live in our stomachs and eat our food? People are doing this? Yes. But, don't. And you're probably thinking, I don't know, might not be so bad if it works. Does it work? No, it doesn't. But it does cause nausea, headaches, infections and diarrhea. Also, keep in mind that the tape worm will lay eggs inside your body which is not only incredibly gross, it will also obstruct your organs and most likely kill you.

The Cotton Ball Diet. Yep. Just eatin' some cotton balls. The theory here is that cotton balls aren't particularly fattening, since they're not actually food, but they do take up a lot of space in your stomach. This makes you feel full, and you won't eat anything else, like oh, let's say, food. While that might be true, you will experience major digestive problems. Here's an experiment you can try at home. Dump a whole bag of cotton balls into the toilet in your house, then flush. What happens? We will tell you. Bad things. The same principle applies when dumping cotton balls down your throat. Except now, you can't just call a plumber because now your intestines have become impacted. They will eventually blow up, you will go septic, and die. This will actually kill you. You don't want that.

The Vision Diet. The concept behind the vision diet is that if you can make the food you're about to eat look truly revolting, you won't want to eat it. Here's what you do. Ready? You put on these glasses with blue lenses in them. You're thinking does this work? No. Of course it doesn't work. It's just stupid. However, unlike the previously mentioned diets, it probably won't kill you. So that's something, anyway.

The point is, if we are willing to do all these things, and more, it's pretty obvious that we want to lose weight. We don't want to be fat. No one wants to have a hard time getting up from a chair. No one wants to be out of breath after walking across their own living room. No one wants to look through rack after rack of clothes in the store and realize the only things that fit have elastic waist bands.

This is not how we want to live our lives, but it's exactly what we're doing.

The thing is we don't have to. It's possible to eat what we want, when we want, and eat as much as we want and not get fat. It is. Really. People all over the world do it. These people don't give a crap about diets. They've never bought a diet book in their lives. They don't waste their time reading labels. They're not counting calories or measuring carbs. They're not concerned about fat content or cholesterol. They're not spending all their free time in the gym. They don't jog. And on top of that, to add insult to injury, they're not only thin, they’re healthy too, and they're living longer.

Seriously. We're not making this up. This is a scientifically proven fact. And as is the case with any real science, it can be replicated. That means you can do what they are doing, and you can expect the same results. Yay, Science!

We're going to show you how these people stay thin without dieting, how they eat whatever they want and don't gain weight, how they stay healthy without working out. Then, once we've proven to you that it actually happens, that these people really do exist, we're going to give you some practical tips to help you become one of them.

First, though, let’s talk about…

* * *

1

How Our Bodies Work

You don't have to know how to build a cell phone to know how to use one, but understanding the basics of how your phone works will help you to get the most out of it. Your body is the same way. You don't have to be an expert, but having a grasp of some basics will be useful.

So here we go: Your body is a pretty sweet machine. Firstly, let’s think about the fact that you are capable of turning those weird little Corn Bugle things you were eating twenty minutes ago into energy. Did you get that? You can insert food into your mouth, right? Then it turns into – wait for it – energy. That might not seem like such a big deal to you because it's something that your body just does, but trust us, it's a big deal. It's amazing because nothing else on the planet can use nacho chips or oranges or ham as fuel. Your car can't do that.

At this point, you are probably expecting us to compare you to a car. And you'd be right, but the thing is, you are way cooler than a car. Sure, a car can take gasoline and turn it into the energy it needs to go, but where does the gasoline come from? If you said from the pump, you are correct. However, we were hoping you might go a bit deeper than that (Deeper, ha! Get it? Oh, wait. We haven't gotten there yet). Gasoline is refined in a lengthy and somewhat boring process from oil found deep within Earth's crust (see, the pun makes sense now. Deeper, get it? It was hilarious). Anyway, oil is a fossil fuel. Fossil as in dinosaur. Now, we know what you're thinking, here, "Whoa, cars are way more awesome than I thought. They're dinosaur powered."

But they're not dinosaur powered. That's our point. You can't just shove a dinosaur into a car and expect it to turn it into fuel. It won't