Billie's Revenge

Billy’s Revenge

Published by J.L.Burbidge at Smashwords

Copyright 2011 J.L.Burbidge

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CHAPTER 1

It isn’t often you come across a dead body so I wasn’t surprised that a pall had descended on our usual after golf lunch. In spite of our efforts to rehash the game and catch up on club gossip, I knew we were all thinking of Billie laid out on the eighteenth tee, cold and still under a canopy of autumn leaves. I remembered the game we used to play in which we buried each other under the leaves, the rest of us hid, and the other team had to guess who was buried. I shivered.

Someone walk over your grave, Jena? Bert put his hand over his mouth and turned pale. Sorry.

Finally we all stopped trying to act as if this was an ordinary lunch after an ordinary game. It didn’t seem appropriate with the police milling around the eighteenth tee and yellow crime tape decorating the area like a macabre party scene. Still, not one of us had wanted to head home early. Hoping, no doubt, that following our familiar routines would make things feel normal when they were anything but.

Edna poked at her salad then laid her fork, perfectly aligned, across her plate. To me, she seems a little obsessive about things but then, some people might call me sloppy so I can’t really judge. I still don’t see why the police said they’d want to talk to us. What has that woman’s death got to do with us? Just because we knew her, doesn’t mean we’d want to kill her. We all looked at Edna and it was to our credit that we didn’t smirk. Of course anyone who knew Billie probably wanted to kill her at some time or other. My fantasies had drifted in that direction: I was sure that everyone else’s had too.

Uh, Edna. Think about what you are saying. Billie slept with most of the guys in high school. She broke up more twosomes than I could ever count. Even though Ted was from away, so hadn’t had the benefit of Billie’s charms as a teen ager, I suspected he had strayed in other directions more than once during his marriage. I also suspected Edna was not completely in the dark. Ted thought he was a swinger and although his attempts did not always meet with success, it wasn’t from lack of trying on Ted’s part. I couldn’t help myself. How would you feel if Ted slept around?

Ted squirmed in his chair. Pass the rolls, Jena. He frowned at me as I stretched across the table to hand him the wicker basket half full of Walnut Hill’s famous whole grain buns. I don’t think you need to go into Miss Jamison’s past circumstances on a day when you should be mourning a friend. Surely her former indiscretions don’t matter now. Edna shot him a look and Ted got very busy buttering his roll.

Sorry Ted, but we’d all better get used to questions. It’s a small town, an unexplained dead body makes people nervous. The police are going to dig into this with all that they’ve got. I saw Len organizing the investigation when I came up from the bathroom. Billie knew most of the folks in town even if she has been living somewhere else for the past twenty years or more. I bit my tongue before I could add, ‘knew in the Biblical sense. Besides, it was Bert who found the body. Our foursome will be the main focus of interest, for now anyway."

Bert almost choked on his wine. Just because I found her, doesn’t mean I killed her. He wiped his mouth with his napkin. I noticed his hand shaking as he carefully put the glass back on the table and wiped a few drops of red off his wrist. I just lost my damn ball. He stared through the floor to ceiling windows at the police activity outside then shook his head. Why did I have to hook that shot? Why did I go looking for the ball? It’s not like I don’t have a bag full of the darn things. He picked up his wine glass again. Now you tell me I’ll be the main suspect. I didn’t even know Billie that well. Just a couple of dates when we were kids. I haven’t seen her in years.

I could see red creeping up his neck. Bert. Remember your blood pressure. I patted his arm. We were all there. We aren’t necessarily suspects, we just found a body. Of course the police will want to talk to us about every little detail from this morning and anything else relating to our acquaintance with Billie. I twisted my wine stem turning the glass to catch the light. I wonder what she was doing back here after all this time? She left for good when her parents died. I haven’t heard of her since then. Any of you heard anything about her?

You didn’t hook the shot, Bert. If you had it would have gone further and we wouldn’t all be sitting here suspected of murder. It was just a very sloppy attempt at a drive. No wonder you lost your ball. Your stance was off and you turned your hand on the way down from your backswing. Your mind wasn’t on the game. We all stared at Edna. True, she was usually the one who pointed out our shortcomings but this did not seem to be the time to rehash a bad swing. Was she avoiding my question or just being Edna?

Hook, fly ball.... who asked you Edna? In fact, who ever asks for your advice? Bert slammed his napkin on the table and pushed back his chair. It swayed unsteadily until I caught it mid-fall as he headed for the washroom. I wondered if I should go after him: decided not. I eyed the wine bottle in the middle of the table.

Edna stared at Bert’s retreating figure for a few seconds, shrugged and turned back to her lunch. She reached for the wine and Ted put his hand over hers. Let me pour that for you, dear, he said. Bert didn’t mean anything, he’s just upset. He’ll be back in a minute.

Ted never crossed Edna, but he didn’t usually call her dear either.It seemed to me he was trying to rack up as many positive points as he could, but why? Whatever was going on, I decided to leave them to it. Excuse me, I said. I think I’ll go change, then ask Len if the police need to speak to us before we leave. I’ll sign for lunch on the way out. Stay and enjoy the wine. See you tomorrow? Tee time is ten-o-four. Edna and Ted nodded. As I left Ted emptied the bottle into their glasses and leaned in close to Edna. It looked to me like he was trying too hard but Edna was right into it. The two of them were impossible to figure out. As a married couple they didn’t inspire any regret that I had never taken that final step.

At the desk, I handed Allie my credit card, watched her punch in the required information then signed the slip.

How was your game, Ms. Burns? Allie fiddled with the papers on the counter. She seemed a little out of it which didn’t surprise me.

Thank you. It was fine until eighteen. Allie was one of my favourite people working at the club. Maybe it was because she was Len’s niece.f My card?

She shook her head. Oh, yes, I forgot.

I pocketed the card. Thanks Allie.

She smiled and tossed her long, blonde curls out of her face. You’re welcome Ms. Burns. You’re now up to date on your monthly fees. See you tomorrow? I hope things calm down. It’s my day on the cart. The staff were meticulously polite even if it was obvious they’d partied late and they wished they were still in bed. Allie always looked and sounded as if she meant the smile and cheery words. Of course, staying with Len she’d never get to party, let alone until three or four in the morning. Those days were certainly over for me. I booked our tee times for the next day.

As I headed for the locker room, I glanced out the window at the top of the stairs. Bert was shoving his clubs into his SUV. He slammed the back down, slipped into the driver’s seat and pulled smoothly out of the lot, almost as if he didn’t want to draw attention to himself. I shook my head. Now I was seeing subversive reasons for ordinary actions. I didn’t think Len would be happy to know that Bert had left without checking in. Maybe I could smooth things over for him. It must have been a shock to kick around in the leaves, trying to spot your ball, and stumble upon a dead body in the process. I’ll never forget his face. I thought he would faint, or throw up. Instead he crumpled to the ground and buried his face in his hands. Ted and I dragged him into the clubhouse, propped him on a stool at the bar and got a shot of scotch into him before he could speak. It’s Billie. I know it’s Billie But what’s she doing out there? he’d said, nodding towards the tee. He wiped at his eyes and propped his head on his hands. Leaned into the bar like it was his best friend. When he straightened up he’d gained some control. Someone call nine one one. He pulled at his pocket and his cell phone fell out.

Ted had picked it up and slipped it back into Bert’s pocket. It’s all right old boy. It’s all in hand. The police are on their way. We had waited in the lounge until Len arrived, took our phone numbers and addresses, warned us to stay in town, then went outside where I could see him, now and then, in the hive of police activity near the tee. Golfers were backed up on the seventeenth green and the marshals were out buzzing around in their carts organizing a pass at eighteen. It looked like most players were heading straight into the bar or to the parking lot. There were a few crossing to one, determined, I suppose, to get their full eighteen in for the day.

Thinking about Billie’s body hidden in the leaves, looking older than I remembered, I wondered how we all could have ordered lunch and actually eaten most of it. Maybe it was a psychological thing. Following our usual weekday routine helped us through the shock. The bottle of wine did its part as well.

Stepping out of the ladies’ shower, I felt cleaner, physically of course, but emotionally and mentally too, as if you could wash murder out of your psyche. I knew it wasn’t that easy. We would all have night mares. On top of that we’d have to talk about it. Len would have questions. He knew most of the girls in town had been more than angry with Billie a few times in the past. Telling him about it over drinks one night I remembered saying. I could kill her for hurting Mari. Now I regretted that careless remark. Of course I didn’t mean it literally but now....

Hi again Jena. Allie passed me, her voice muffled behind a pile of puffy white towels. She put them in the clean towel slot and gathered the wet ones in a laundry basket. Uncle Len is looking for you. I told him you were probably in the shower. He wants to see you before you leave. She dumped the towels into the washing machine, slammed the door and pushed the on button. She waved as she headed for the stairs.

Oh, to be young again with the world at your feet. Worrying about the tips you might not get because there had been a murder. Nothing to do with you so why sweat it? Allie usually lived here only in the summer. Len got her a job at the course her first year in university, let her stay with him, and watched out that the cart girl repartee with the old farts and randy young men didn’t go any further than talk. Maybe Allie was lucky to have Len on her side but I noticed she didn’t have much of a social life while she was here. Bert said he thought Len was a little too protective. Maybe he was right. This was her second year at the club. In my opinion, Allie with her cheeky personality, tanned body that was at least forty-five years back for me, and those blonde curls, should have made some local friends by now. Not even a boyfriend, unless you counted the grounds crew that made all sorts of excuses to pick up a coffee at the bar rather than use the machine designated for staff. Not my worry. Why was I even thinking about Allie’s social life? I had enough on my mind. I pushed the pause button on the machine and threw in my used towel, added the detergent that Allie had forgotten and restarted the machine. Not club procedure but why waste water or time?

Upstairs Allie was at the desk. Bye Ms. Burns. Uncle Len’s on the patio. She waved as she picked up the phone. Good afternoon, Walnut Hill Golf Club. How may I help you?

Len lifted his glass of orange juice as I sat down. Want something?

No thanks. We just finished lunch. I pulled out a chair and sat across from him. Len was still goodlooking for a man who should have retired five years ago. Grey hair cut short, always the shadow of a beard, and a sharp featured face. There was nothing about