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    Love: The Owner's Manual
    Love: The Owner's Manual
    Love: The Owner's Manual
    Ebook71 pages57 minutes

    Love: The Owner's Manual

    By Pierce Howard

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    About this ebook

    Cutting-edge, user-friendly, and comprehensive: the revolutionary guide to the brain, now fully revised and updated

    At birth each of us is given the most powerful and complex tool of all time: the human brain. And yet, as we well know, it doesn't come with an owner's manual—until now. In this unsurpassed resource, Dr. Pierce J. Howard and his team distill the very latest research and clearly explain the practical, real-world applications to our daily lives. Drawing from the frontiers of psychology, neurobiology, and cognitive science, yet organized and written for maximum usability, The Owner's Manual for the Brain, Fourth Edition, is your comprehensive guide to optimum mental performance and well-being. It should be on every thinking person's bookshelf.

    • What are the ingredients of happiness?
    • Which are the best remedies for headaches and migraines?
    • How can we master creativity, focus, decision making, and willpower?
    • What are the best brain foods?
    • How is it possible to boost memory and intelligence?
    • What is the secret to getting a good night's sleep?
    • How can you positively manage depression, anxiety, addiction, and other disorders?
    • What is the impact of nutrition, stress, and exercise on the brain?
    • Is personality hard-wired or fluid?
    • What are the best strategies when recovering from trauma and loss?
    • How do moods and emotions interact?
    • What is the ideal learning environment for children?
    • How do love, humor, music, friendship, and nature contribute to well-being?
    • Are there ways of reducing negative traits such as aggression, short-temperedness, or irritability?
    • What is the recommended treatment for concussions?
    • Can you delay or prevent Alzheimer's and dementia?
    • What are the most important ingredients to a successful marriage and family?
    • What do the world's most effective managers know about leadership, motivation, and persuasion?
    • Plus 1,000s more topics!
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherHarperCollins
    Release dateMay 6, 2014
    ISBN9780062357670
    Love: The Owner's Manual
    Author

    Pierce Howard

    Pierce J. Howard, Ph.D., is director of research and development for the Center for Applied Cognitive Studies in Charlotte, North Carolina. Since the first edition of The Owner's Manual for the Brain was published in 1994, Dr. Howard has appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show and conducted countless seminars around the world. He is a member of the American Psychological Association, the Society for Industrial and Organizational Psychology, and the International Test Commission.

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      Book preview

      Love - Pierce Howard

      Contents

      A Note to the Reader

      Love and Romance: The Wiring Is the Name of the Game

      1 Sexual Identity: How We See Ourselves

      2 Sexual Orientation: To Whom We Are Attracted

      3 Sexual Role: Our Everyday Behavior

      4 The Ideal Mate: Factors Influencing Partner Selection

      5 Lust, Romance, and Attachment: An Overview

      6 Lust: The Neurochemistry of the One-Night Stand

      7 Romance: The Neurochemistry of Consuming Adoration

      8 Attachment: The Neurochemistry of the Long-Haul Relationship

      9 Maintaining Relationships

      10 Handling Rejection

      11 Jealousy

      12 Affairs

      13 The Effects of Marital Discord

      14 Sexual Fantasies

      15 Orgasm

      16 Personality Traits and Sexual Behavior

      17 Inbreeding

      The Author

      Credits

      Copyright

      About the Publisher

      A Note to the Reader

      Please note that all topic numbers and cross-references refer to those in the larger work.

      Love and Romance

      Love and relationships have always been associated with chemistry. Hence, the expression that two people do or do not have good chemistry together. From Bacchus (alcohol) to Romeo and Juliet ( a potion), chemicals have enhanced or detracted from the quality of relationships.

      With the recent Decade of the Brain (1990–1999) still fresh in their minds, neuroscientists have enumerated some of the specific roles that chemicals play in the game of love. Here is a partial listing of the chemicals of desire:

      •   Nitric oxide (NO). Increases blood flow and vessel dilation (associated, e.g., with tumescence).

      •   Vasoactive intestinal polypeptide (VIP). Effects similar to nitric oxide.

      •   Pheromones. Armpit-produced scents that elicit unconscious sexual desire.

      •   Epinephrine and norepinephrine. Cause the heart to beat faster and enhance the effects of NO and VIP.

      •   Estrogen. Creates desire in women (and possibly men) by triggering dopamine release.

      •   Dopamine. This critical ingredient causes the individual to fantasize and consider the possibilities latent in a sexual situation.

      •   Serotonin. Too much before sexual situations tends to suppress sexual arousal, but successful sexual activity results in the pleasureable effects of increased serotonin levels that orgasm entails.

      •   Phenylethylamine (PEA). Associated with feelings of well-being and romance; levels increase during orgasm and ovulation and after exercise; found in chocolate.

      •   Alpha melanocyte polypeptide (AMP). Associated with the beginning of an erection and the heightening of a male’s interest in sex.

      •   Oxytocin. Makes possible pelvic contractions during female orgasm; contributes to bonding; often referred to as the trust hormone.

      •   Testosterone. Creates desire in both men and women; low testosterone associated in both sexes with minimization or absence of sexual desire.

      Now, those are the chemical pieces of the love and relationships puzzle. Let’s take a look at how they fit together.

      Our sexual makeup is complex and multifaceted. One way of separating this mix of issues, behaviors, feelings, and urges is to group them into three focal areas:

      Identity: whether we call ourselves a man (boy) or woman (girl). In other words, do I feel like a man (or woman), regardless of my bodily characteristics?

      Orientation: to whom am I attracted romantically—people with a different sexual identify (as in a man desiring a woman), or people with my sexual identity (as in a man desiring another man)?

      Behavior: to what degree do I act or behave like others of my sexual identity? For examples, boys who act like most girls (e.g., playing with dolls, displaying effeminate voice, facial expressions, or gestures) are called sissy, and girls who act like most boys (doing math, playing sports, enjoying hunting or fishing) are called tomboys.

      These three elements of sexuality are independent of each other, in the sense that, for example, a male could see himself as a male and be attracted to females, yet act like a female. Or a male could see himself as a female, be attracted to females, and act like a male. Just because an individual exhibits a particular profile in one of the three areas does not necessarily lead to a particular profile in the other two areas. One of

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