Slow Dance With Sasquatch
By Jeremy Radin
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Slow Dance With Sasquatch - Jeremy Radin
Author
PART I
LOVE LETTERS TO THE LORD OF ROOMS
May he be reincarnated as a chandelier and hang by day and burn by night
—Yiddish curse
HOW IT IS MADE
In her absence he lays
with his bloodless
fist pulsing
against his chest.
His other hand,
in front of his mouth
so his breath curls
back and back and back.
In her absence
he invents her
and falls in love
with the inventing
as his friends
become husbands
and fathers.
BLIND RIFLER OF DOVES
after Shira Erlichman
This sadness, a sack of blind
doves, opened by a man
in a helicopter. I shoot at them, blind
too, blind rifler of doves, hands
full of rifles. The doves explode, light
the dusk with fireworks of flour. Tomorrow
the yard is a stand of cake
trees. This sadness, an ascension
into bleached woods, a blind sack
of dead doves, rifle fingers
finding always the small hearts,
shivering bits of confetti, neighbor
children building houses in a forest
of my sorrow, climbing, biting
the necks of the cake trees, faces
bearded with frosting, my skin
a seed bag, overflowing
with bullets.
A PYRAMID OF BISON
Here is the home I have come back to
after my most magnificent failing.
My father’s house at the end of the road.
Here is the brick staircase that leads to the front door.
Here is the part where I climb it again, pride
tucked like socks
into unworn work boots.
Here is the hallway that spits me into kitchen.
The clutter, the rainwater, sinking
through the ceiling. Crispex rooted. Dish crust
crusting. Rind. Stem. Knife.
Here is the refrigerator. White, woodless casket.
How many times have I buried myself in it?
Harmonizing with the humming ‘til the lights burned
out. ‘Til I dreamed of sex
amongst the pickles, the cream cheese.
Here is papa’s credit card, lying on the table
so I do not go hungry or learn how to hunt.
Here is the couch that has memorized
the shape of me.
Here is the carpet that drinks deep the cream soda,
the barbecue sauce, the globs of cake frosting.
Here is the TV – furnace flicker mouth-king.
How many hours have I shoveled through
your yawn?
Here is the bedroom with nothing on the walls.
Pictures in frames on the closet floor. Collages
of songwriters, stuffed behind dressers.
Here is the bed. The one-man country. The quiet
war. Limp. Anthemless.
Here are my bloodlines, hardening in boxer briefs.
Here is a sock you could use as a boomerang.
Here is the mirror. The liar. The yes thief.
Here are bookshelves like buildings, stacked up with stories.
The books that I wish were a cold flock of shotguns.
How I long for the pages
to turn against my skull.
Here is the empty
and here is the empty.
Here are the secrets
and here are the secrets.
Here is the truth that I play hide and seek with.
Here are my sorrows – a pyramid of bison.
How did I ever stack heavy so high?
Here is where I murdered the men I wished to be:
Kite-eating loverboys, steel-skinned rain heroes,
bone-brushers, moon-pushers,
gruff pickers of pears.
What did we think we were trying to do?
Why did we ever think we could?
This house, it grins
like an autopsied carcass, says
This is how I will always remember you: trembling
like an antelope brought down by arrows,
asking the arrows
if it’s okay to bleed.
SO SPEAKS THE LORD OF ROOMS
When the night pushes your head into its lap, chokes you with its yesless anatomy. When the whiskey is a bellyful of dark nails. When you never drink, but tonight is a fresh death, I am this night. When wicked tangle finds your hunger. When the high-heel party bulletholes your brain, rakes across your nerves, this is me. When heavy hangs like blanket hell. When sleep mocks you from the corners of the room. When lust