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    God Save The Taxman
    God Save The Taxman
    God Save The Taxman
    Ebook72 pages59 minutes

    God Save The Taxman

    By Glen Dennis

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    About this ebook

    Alf Goodman is a contract staff specialist in the IT industry. He has problems - specifically with public liability insurance for his business, the Goods and Services Tax, and smoking. While sneaking a quick puff in a high-rise car park, Alf has a major depressive episode, which gets him into a ridiculously dangerous situation, perched on a high ledge of the car park building.
    Godfrey Whitmore broods over his boring job as a spin-doctor for the Minister for Employment, Training and Enterprise Resources until he is given an unexpected assignment by the Minister’s personal assistant, Lola Hope. He must stand in for the Minister at an award presentation at a small business incubator, while the Minister is preoccupied with a GST error that threatens to get him in trouble with the Prime Minister. Godfrey rushes to get to the function on time but fate intervenes and he doesn’t make it. Instead he ends up in hospital after a freak accident.
    As Alf teeters on the ledge of the car park, the voice of God gives him the WORD, lecturing him about his obsession with taxation, insurance and his frustrated attempts to change the system. Suddenly Alf is blown from the ledge.
    Alf wakes in great pain to discover from his wife Doris that he is in Calvary Hospital after a “fall” which he believes has left him on the brink of death. Then he awakens to another voice, that of Godfrey Whitmore, a patient in the next bed, who claims Alf is responsible for his injuries. After further sedation, Alf re-awakens to find Godfrey, Lola and a reporter friend, Pete, who asks him what happened. Fearful of being sued, Alf spins an elaborate story of the circumstances leading to his fall. After Pete leaves to write a report on the freak accident, Lola explains to Godfrey that Alf is the author of a mystery email suggesting a radical tax plan. She explains that the Minister wants Godfrey to find out what he can about Alf, implying he is a political threat.
    Godfrey and Alf learn a little about each other and develop a genuine rapport.
    The article Pete publishes in the paper about “the accident” makes Godfrey out to be a hero, along with the Minister, for saving Alf and small business generally from a fatal fall. It also provides a distraction from the Minister’s GST scandal.
    Godfrey gets Alf talking about his problems and his views about the banks collecting tax, rather than burdening small business with the job.
    Godfrey finally gets Alf to reveal his tax plan in detail. A single flat rate tax on everybody is really the only tax the government would need to get the funds for all essential services, while regulating the banks and monitoring big business. It would prevent financial collapses, tax avoidance and the rate needed would be a key performance indicator of the government’s efficiency. Godfrey tries in vain to find a hole in Alf’s plan but he finally concedes it is sound.
    Alf expresses doubts that the banks or the government would tolerate such transparency and accountability, but Godfrey points out that is what they are responsible for - managing people’s money and the economy.
    Godfrey states that the people are the customers of the banks and the government. It’s what the people say at the poll that counts. He suggests Alf stand for parliament? When Alf points out that he is in no shape to stand, Godfrey vows to champion Alf’s cause for tax reform.
    Alf can finally rest in peace, but Godfrey secretly doubts he can beat the party machine – that would take an act of God.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherGlen Dennis
    Release dateApr 18, 2016
    ISBN9781311202215
    God Save The Taxman
    Author

    Glen Dennis

    Glen Dennis began his career as a Commercial Trainee in BHP’s Whyalla Steelworks and Shipyard. His first posting was in their purchasing department where he learned to make sound ethical buying decisions and negotiate contracts.He studied economics, finance & accounting and contract law, plus a unit in computer programming. After working his way up to supply and contract management roles with several major mining operations, he started his own contract consulting business, Supply and Contract Resources. His main aim was to help clients and colleagues improve their supply chain and contract administration processes and he soon had to contract out other procurement and supply chain professionals to meet growing client demand.Contract staffing proved to be a very effective recruitment process and in a few years he and his wife were making good money providing good people to clients across Australia. They had bought their home, educated their children and achieved respect and status in the business community and supply chain fraternity. Seeking a healthy work - life balance, rather than wealth, they decided to spread the wealth and the workload by franchising the business as ProcureNet.The introduction of GST (the New Simplified Tax System), along with payroll tax, fringe benefit tax, superannuation, work cover and insurance made compliance more difficult, not simpler. The global financial crisis in 2008 also took its toll, making people less inclined to take a risk by going into business for themselves or buying a franchise. People sought the security of “permanent” employment rather than contracting.The business prospered for almost 20 years by maintaining the simplest approach possible, and by giving clients and candidates the best possible customer service and value. In 2013, Glen wound the business up and retired.He now seeks satisfaction and fulfillment from art, music and writing in his studio in Strathalbyn, South Australia.

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      Book preview

      God Save The Taxman - Glen Dennis

      GOD SAVE THE TAXMAN

      Glen Dennis

      Copyright 2016 Glen Dennis

      Smashwords Edition

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. It may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      The characters and plots in this book are entirely fictitious. They are based on the author's personal experience and perception of public figures and political events that are a matter of public record.

      TABLE OF CONTENTS

      Chapter One - Alf Goodman

      Chapter Two - Gof Whitmore

      Chapter Three - The Minister

      Chapter Four - The Reverie

      Chapter Five - The Email

      Chapter Six - Date with Fate

      Chapter Seven - The Word

      Chapter Eight - Calvary

      Chapter Nine - The Story

      Chapter Ten - The Article

      Chapter Eleven - Revelations

      About the Author

      Other Books

      Connect With Me

      CHAPTER ONE

      Alf Goodman

      It was a God-awful day for Spring. The sky was leaden over the CitiPark complex in Canberra. Alf felt like a giant snowman was breathing down the back of his neck. I must be mad, he thought. Huddled in a concrete maze designed to let exhaust fumes escape before killing you, sucking on a cancer-stick. Hardly the cool character depicted in the old ads on telly. Peter Stuyvesant smokers are supposed to be swanning around sidewalk cafés in the Big Apple. Sitting with gorgeous women in business suits designed to make them look intelligent, without hiding their knockers. Successful businessmen are not supposed to be alone, freezing in a high-rise hideaway, getting a quick fix. Alf looked around nervously. Someone from the office could come along any minute. Someone who really needed to go to their car. Not someone who just made out to forget something in the car. That’s the excuse Alf gave his receptionist this time, to get away for a quick puff.

      I really must quit, before this gets a hold on me again, Alf thought.

      Christ! Who am I kidding?

      He took one last long drag, and literally gave it the flick. But the wind caught it, and deposited it neatly on the ledge, outside the low-walled barrier. The tip glowed like a one-eyed devil, shining brighter as the wind fanned it, as if winking with evil intent at him through the bars that topped off the low wall. It still had half left to burn.

      What if it should blow off the ledge and drop to the street? It could land in the blue-rinse of some poor old dear who had just come out of the hair salon next door. That hairspray can be nasty stuff. Besides lacquering your lungs, it is probably highly inflammable. She would light up like a flamin’ torch Alf thought, and my public liability cover is in bad shape as it is.

      ‘The least I can do is stop littering’, he muttered to himself.

      Alf quickly swung his leg over the railing, crushing his nuts in the process. The railing was higher than he thought, and it brought tears to his eyes as he soldiered on with the other leg. The ledge was narrow. Alf could not put his feet flat without the toes of his shoes protruding over the edge. He held on to the rail like grim death with one hand, and slowly squatted down with one foot on the ledge and the other dangling in mid air until he could reach the little bugger. Got it! But instead of stubbing it out, he stood up quickly, until he was standing with his back bowed painfully against the rail. After gaining his balance and straightening up, Alf shrugged, as if to say, ‘I may as well finish it. After the risk and effort of retrieving the damned thing.’ He took another last long drag on the gritty filter. The wind whipped his face as he peered down at the deserted side street, four levels below. Not a blue-rinse in sight. However, from where he was perched, Alf could see the sign in his office window, across the way.

      STAFF I.T. - Simply Making IT Work in bold lettering, with MANAGING CONSULTANT – ALFRED GOODMAN JR underneath. The words sneered at him from beneath the awning. Managing? Like hell! He coughed a laugh bitterly to himself. A tear broke loose and ran down his cheek. He told himself it must be rain?

      Alf coughed again and spluttered out loud. Stuff IT! Suddenly the sign went blurry and the world began to spin, faster. He wasn’t sure whether it was a black headache induced by the nicotine, or standing up too quickly, or maybe by his

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