Michael Londergan Argument 1A McGough November 14, 2013 Social Media vs. Relationships Social media.

. While it was designed to bring people closer together, it is instead tearing people apart. We live in a world where technology has reached a state where one can connect with virtually anybody else around the world. This has been made possible via the internet and phones that seem capable of doing anything. Countless websites such as Facebook, Twitter, Skype, and LinkedIn, to name a few, have been able to bring people together and continue to stay in touch even if they are thousands of miles away. Even though this great leap in technology may seem very convenient and helpful, I write this article to expose its flaws. This new technology is being used more and more, especially by current teens. Communication through cell phones and social media dominates actual face-to-face interaction. In todays society, it is becoming increasingly evident how the overuse of social media and communication by cell phones is slowly, but surely, affecting the lives of people and impacting existing relationships for the worse. Before the internet, the widely accepted form of communication that did not involve face-to-face interaction was writing letters. This method of communication was not very convenient or fast, but this was what made letter writing so much more meaningful. Today, there exist over 1 billion users on Facebook (Kaiser) with many more joining each minute. In order to communicate today, all somebody has to do is press a few buttons and their friend will receive the sent message immediately. This new means of communication, generally speaking, is taking the meaningfulness out of the communication with people who are not standing in front of you. Next, the emotions that someone may use through texting or social media may not correctly portray the actual emotions of a person. According to mother Sharon Seline, after exchanging positive statements, smiley faces, and hearts with her daughter through text, her daughter attempted suicide (Tardanico). Her depression was invisible through her Facebook posts, tweets, and texting behavior. It is difficult to believe that communication through texting and social media can ever effectively replace face to face contact as it does not always correctly depict ones emotions. In response to this disheartening story, studies have shown that only 7% of communication is based on written or verbal word while a whopping 93% is based on nonverbal body language (Tardanico). It is only when you can look into someones eyes when they say Im okay and know that they actually mean it. Instead, our conversations have developed into abbreviations of conversation which may or may not be representative of what a person is really feeling. The use of social media is becoming far too common. According to USA Today, there are almost one billion current users on Facebook (Fowlkes). This means that almost one out of every seven people on this planet possesses an online profile for this single website. Even though Facebook may be very convenient for some people to find and connect with old or current friends, it can be very stressful. Also, the time and effort spent talking to these friends while continuing to keep your own profile updated can be very time consuming. Many teenagers possess profiles on multiple social media websites, which, in turn, has taken up even more time to constantly check and update statuses. An example of how phones and social media are a large distraction is one of my own personal experience. While eating at a local restaurant, a rather young couple walked in and took a seat at their table. Shortly after seating themselves, they both took out their cell phones and immersed themselves in their own cyber worlds. From what I saw, not a word was exchanged between the two until their food arrived and they started to eat. A healthy relationship is not one that must make

Michael Londergan Argument 1A McGough November 14, 2013 time for social media and similar distractions. Overall, the wasted time spent on social media and texting can interfere with ones life and relationships. Not only does social media take time away from a person, but it is also blamed for ruining current relationships. According to surveys by DailyMail.co, attorneys have reported that one in five current divorces involve Facebook in some way (Gardner). Facebook is known to bring out jealousy in people so it is not surprising that it plays such a significant role in relationships, especially with married couples. Furthermore, a study done of over 25,000 married couples by the University of Oxfords Internet Institute revealed that couples who communicate over five or more means of social media revealed a 14% decrease in marriage satisfaction (Borresen). Not that staying in touch with a significant other over social media will ruin a relationship, but adding more ways of communication can add unnecessary dimensions to a relationship. Below, Figure 1 portrays, a bit extremely and satirically, how a woman may feel in terms of social media and their relationship.

Figure 1 illustrates a comical obsession of a woman craving attention from her significant other over social media. (Source: Ouch!)

Another unfortunate issue related to the use of social media is cyberbullying. Ponder this; is it not much easier to be rude or to start an argument with somebody online than in person? Its as easy as typing a sentence and clicking the send button to create an all-out war online. According to a survey conducted by the corporate training firm VitalSmarts, one in five people have reduced their face-to-face contact with someone they know after an online fight (Reuters). In response to this data, co-chairman of the company VItalSmarts Joseph Grenny commented, The world has changed and a significant proportion of relationships happen online but manners haven't caught up with technology (Reuters). This is a hopeful perspective upon online manners and how they may eventually develop in the future. However, there it is difficult to believe that the entire world can change in terms of personality and how people treat others over social media.

Michael Londergan Argument 1A McGough November 14, 2013 There is no doubt that technology will continue to advance in the future. However, this does not mean that communication over social media and texting should ever replace face to face conversation. Also, however much it may seem that I am attempting to bash social media, it is more the users fault than the websites when it comes to relationships tainted over the internet. As mentioned in an article, Facebook itself isn't to blame for the demise of domestic bliss. Instead, it's an avenue by which threats can develop if you fail to communicate about them and one that can exacerbate problems that already exist (Bindley). This article I have written has been more of a warning than an attack on social media. It should be used conservatively and as a means of connection and not obsession.

Michael Londergan Argument 1A McGough November 14, 2013

Works Cited
Bindley, Katherine. "Facebook Relationship Problems: How Social Networking and Jealousy Affect Your Love Life." The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, 09 Sept. 2011. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Borresen, Kelsey. "Social Media Study Finds Link Between Media Use and Relationship Satisfaction." The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, 15 Apr. 2013. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Fowlkes, Jasmine. "Opinion: Why Social Media Is Destroying Our Social Skills | USA TODAY College." Opinion: Why Social Media Is Destroying Our Social Skills | USA TODAY College. N.p., 11 Oct. 2012. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Gardner, David. "The Marriage Killer: One in Five American Divorces Now Involve Facebook." Mail Online. N.p., 1 Dec. 2010. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Kaiser, Stacy. "Social Media Can Both Help and Hurt Real-life Relationships."USATODAY.COM. USA Today, 13 Feb. 2012. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Ouch! Digital image. BitSocialMedia.com. MidLifeRocksBlog, 30 Aug. 2011. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Reuters. "People More Likely to Be Rude on Social Media; Affects Friendships in Real Life." NY Daily News. N.p., 10 Apr. 2013. Web. 18 Nov. 2013. Tardanico, Susan. "Is Social Media Sabotaging Real Communication?" Forbes. Forbes Magazine, 30 Apr. 2012. Web. 18 Nov. 2013.