Grief counselors offer solace amid

tragedy
By Josh Levs, CNN
Aurora, Colorado (CNN) -- Picture the monumental task of counseling strangers affected by
a horror worse than they've ever imagined.
Now, imagine spending an entire career doing that, year after year.
egularly e!posed to the aftermath of deadly attacks and natural disasters, grief counselors
face the fury of "other Nature and the worst of humanity -- while leading the effort to
counteract it with the best.
#hose who sign up for disaster counseling re$uire a demeanor, depth and inner-strength to
keep going, e!perts say.
%&ur 'ob is to provide psychological first aid and to help people find their strengths,% says
"argaret Charlton, a psychologist who has been handling calls and walk-ins at a hotline
center here in (urora, Colorado, since )riday's massacre at a midnight showing of the new
Batman film %#he *ark +night ises.%
emembering the victims
%,n this type of shooting disaster, the une!pectedness of it is a big part of the difficulty for
unsettling families, because they want to know why. (nd we know after we've done this for a
while that there often isn't an answer as to why. -o you're trying to help people move past
that without being able to know,% she said.
#he center and its partners spoke with about .// people within .0 hours of the shootings,
and more have been coming in since.
"any are locals who knew victims. -ome are even relatives.
%&ne woman lost her daughter who had small children,% says 1olly Cappello, one of the
counselors here. %(nd she didn't know how to e!actly go about talking to the small children
about this loss.%
-o far, the task of these counselors has been first to e!press sympathies for any loss, says
Cappello, %then try to sort out from them what it is that they need in this moment.%
#hey listen, offer words of support and encouragement, and focus on helping in pragmatic
ways to relieve other concerns -- getting families help for planning memorial services or
financial support. %-o part of it is education,% says Cappello. %(nd part of it is accessing
resources for the person who is grieving.%
2hile every disaster is uni$ue, this one hit %very, very close to home,% says Cappello.
%2e knew a lot of teenagers who had friends there -- or who were shot,% she said.
(nd the gunman targeted what most people feel is a safe place. 3oing to the movies is even
something disaster counselors often suggest that families do together as a positive
e!perience, she said.
&pinion4 Can we feel safe in a crowd anymore5
Cappello herself has a 67-year-old daughter, and understands the fears many parents now
have when their children are going out.
%8ou think when you send your child to an event like that, there's a likelihood of it being
safe,% she says.
#he ability to associate with those needing counseling is helpful, but it also speaks to a
professional ha9ard4 vicarious trauma, also called secondary trauma. Counselors can
e!perience their own emotional toll.
%, have a feeling in a few days , will have a story of vicarious trauma,% says psychologist
+irsten (nderson, who has been coordinating counseling efforts at the disaster response site
in (urora. :ust weeks ago she was working with evacuees from wildfires in the state. ,n ./6/
she helped those affected by massive wildfires at )ourmile Canyon in Boulder.
Counselors these days are given a lot of training on how to handle the stresses, and how to
recogni9e symptoms of secondary trauma in themselves, (nderson says. %#hat's why we
check in with people% who are offering the counseling, to see how they are, she said. (nd %a
part of our professional duty is preparing ourselves.%
#he toll it takes on counselors is a big reason there's plenty of attrition in the industry, the
psychologists say.
(nd they've had times when they chose not to take part in counseling after certain events,
because they knew they weren't up to it.
%, was tired or there were family crises going on that left me without enough reserves,%
Charlton says.
; tips on talking to kids about scary news
But for all the challenges, the e!perience -- amid tragedy and devastation -- is incredibly
rewarding.
%, think it's important for everyone, not 'ust professionals, to feel like they're contributing,
helping the community heal from what has happened,% says (nderson. %,t's rewarding for
everyone.%
%,f , was going to be a medical doctor, ,'d be an <.. doctor,% adds Cappello, who has worked
in disaster response for ./ years. %, like a lot of energy, , think , do well under pressure.%
2hatever the perils of the profession, she says, the work is worth it. %,f you have a skill you
want to utili9e it in a way that helps people. 2hen they're having the worst day of their life
and you're there to help them with that, that's a small personal price to pay.%
)or now, they're focused on helping the community of (urora move on.
#he goal for initial disaster counseling is to help people have %a little less pain at that point,%
says Charlton.
%People have a little more peace, a little more normalcy than before they chatted with us,%
says (nderson.
#he result can be enormous.
(bout =/> of those who seek this kind of help often have a %spontaneous recovery,%
Charlton says.
#hat doesn't mean they suddenly feel fine -- it means the counseling can help steer people in
a direction away from developing Post-#raumatic -tress *isorder. #hey will go through the
normal grief process and think about the events for a long time, but then will move on.
%"ost people are resilient,% says Charlton, who has been working in disaster response since
6?== and helped people after the Columbine massacre, as well as evacuees from 1urricane
+atrina. %&ur 'ob in disaster response is to help them find their resilience.%
Miranda Simon
Tootalian
English 12
This article, Grief Counselors offer solace amid tragedy by Josh e!s is about
the horrible tragedy of the shooting in the mo!ie theatre" Multi#le #eo#le died, and grief
counselors hel#ed the ones $ho lost somebody" They ha!e to hel# #eo#le reali%e that
there isn&t a reason $hy, that they 'ust ha!e to acce#t it ha##ened" They try to get #eo#le
to forget about their $ea(nesses" )ur 'ob is to #ro!ide #sychological first aid and to hel#
#eo#le find their strengths*Charlton 1+" ,eo#le $ould thin( of going to the mo!ies as
being a safe acti!ity, ne!er e-#ecting someone to come and ta(e the li!es of innocent
#eo#le" Grief counselors ha!e to hel# others mo!e on from this tragedy" These #eo#le
$ill not be fine right a$ay. the counseling 'ust gi!es them direction to try and mo!e #ast
it and (ee# li!ing their li!es"
This article sho$s leadershi# because these counselors gi!e #eo#le ho#e $hen
they lose someone they lo!e" Grief counselors lead others to mo!e on from something
they cannot change" That doesn/t mean they suddenly feel fine 00 it means the counseling
can hel# steer #eo#le in a direction a$ay from de!elo#ing ,ost0Traumatic Stress
1isorder*e!s 2+" This article e-#lains a horrible tragedy that ha##ened, and that these
counselors hel# the ones going through it and teach them ho$ to get #ast it" They listen,
offer $ords of su##ort and encouragement, and focus on hel#ing in #ragmatic $ays to
relie!e other concerns 00 getting families hel# for #lanning memorial ser!ices or financial
su##ort*e!s 1+" Grief counselors are leaders in many $ays and many #eo#le loo( u# to
them and to their guidance"