Isaiah Rainey

Professor Dagher
UWRT 1102
5 April 15

Fresh out of the fifth grade and soon to be a sixth grader at Grays Creek middle
school I experienced what most military families experience in todays world, divorce.
Being that I was only 12 years old I was confused as to why this event occurred and why
my family would no longer be together. After being told several times that the divorce
was not my fault and that I should not worry about the separation of my parents, I
refrained from putting any thought on why the divorce occurred. However now that I am
pursing a career of my own in the military I found it to be of my best interest to research
the affects of a military lifestyle on couples as well as the family as a whole.
Through my findings I am able to distinguish the different phases of deployment,
as well as be able to inform others of the affects of Posttraumatic Stress Disorder.
Knowing the different phases of deployment is key to understanding the stresses
and change in family dynamic that are implemented into the household during this
difficult time of a military family. To begin, there are three distinct phases of deployment.
They are pre-deployment, deployment, and post-deployment. During each phase the
family and service member are often on divergent paths. Meaning the family wants to
achieve one thing while the service member wants to achieve another. For example
during the phase of pre-deployment significant others and family members will feel the
need to spend additional time with their service member. This is caused by the thought
of losing their service member during their time being overseas. Contrarily, the service

member is trying to detach him or herself from the family mentally and physically. This
means spending more time at work rather than at home with the family. This clash in
wants and needs often results in tension, which is often present in the next phase of
deployment.
During the early stages of the deployment phase the family will feel abandoned by
their service member. The missing piece in their family may cause a sense of
disharmony within the family roles. It will not be until the middle of deployment until the
family begins to gain confidence in their new roles and become acclimated to the
deployment period. What I found to have been surprising was that during late
deployment there is a sense of anxiety in the household. To elaborate on this, spouses
and or children may feel nervous upon being notified that their service member is
returning home. This is caused by realizing that there has been a shift in family roles and
feeling obligated to re-organize the roles of the family in order to accommodate for the
service member.