Mariana Vasquez

Reflection Essay
Throughout the process of revising my position paper, I have significantly grown
as a writer. I made many great changes to the position paper and resulted with another
outstanding form of writing. I used different techniques in my revision than the ones I
used in my original draft of the position paper. Each technique had a purpose and
contributed to the creation of a purposeful writing.
For my position paper, my purpose was to take a stance on an issue and show the
importance of it to a non-profit organization. I took the stance of the media severely
impacting children and adolescents. I emphasized how it impaired their cognition and led
them to develop abnormal behaviors and psychological disorders. I began by thoroughly
explaining the three brain stages a child undergoes and showed how each one is affected
by the media. I examined both viewpoints of the issue in order to support my argument,
and I found that my stance was relatively more supported than the opposing view. Now,
the first drastic change I made for the creative revision of my position paper was
changing the medium. I transformed the position paper into a brochure. I did this because
I not only wanted to inform about the problem but also persuade action to be taken. By
this, I changed the audience of my revision to parents because they are the ones who can
make a difference by prohibiting the excessive use of video games and electronics, and or
teaching there children the right aspects of the media. In the brochure, I had to take a
different approach on my stance in order to effectively carry out my purpose. I decided to
leave the basic information from the position paper in a condensed form. I did this
because the information I used in the position paper was the same one I need to provide

in the brochure. I gave a few details that entailed the effects of the media, and took the
risk of not adding a full explanation of how the media affects each brain developing stage
like I did in the position paper. I did this because I wanted to consolidate the stages and
rather focus on the main side effects. I did want to take too much time on the stages and
cause that to take away from the main points of the media causing children to develop
abnormal behaviors. It is why I simply added a section labeled The bad side effects in
order to show the outcomes of the media and use of electronics. For the first part of the
first half of the brochure I place my information in bullet form. I did this because in
contrast from the position paper, a brochure is condense and I wanted to make it easy to
read for my audience so that they could understand the problem and side effects. In the
revision I included headers like HELP, and BE A HERO to show the aid children
need due to the media and to show parents that they can do something about the problem.
I believe it was a good form to catch attention and emphasize the problem. Also, I
included taglines like teach your children the right choices and Its time to set
guidelines in order to provide a supportive impression for the parents. Another big
difference that I made to the revision was adding a short section that addressed parents
and gave them advice on what to do to help their children avoid experiencing abnormal
behaviors. I didnt want to simply add a phone number for them to contact because not all
children have an addiction. Addictions develop over time and so by addressing the
parents they became known to being able to do something before an addiction arises. I
advised how parents can address the problem and make a difference. Now, lastly I chose
to include pictures that showcased the problem and provided a visualization of depression
turning into happiness through parental guidance. I also decided to include contact

information for parents. I did this because they complimented the advice I gave to the
parents. I said Enroll them in sports and activities that dont leave them enough time for
the use of electronics and Simply provide them with positive reinforcement and or seek
professional help. So, the contact info consisted of an activity web page, and
professional help phone number.
As you can see, I performed multiples changes to my position paper. I condensed
the information from the position paper into a brief but strong overview of the effects the
media has on children. I used headlines and pictures to emphasize the problem and
demand a call of action. I addressed the audience specifically to persuade them to take
action and how to take action. I believe I have improved as a writer in the aspect of being
able to transform one type of writing into another medium and carryout different
rhetorical situations.