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Mellissa Nuo
Professor DerOhanessian
English 113B, 8:00-9:15am
5 May 2015
Domestic Violence in Teenage Relationships
33% of adolescents in America are victims to sexual, physical, verbal, or emotional
dating abuse (Teen Dating Violence, DoSomething). Throughout the United States, domestic
violence has been a problem and still is to this day. It is an issue that does not get noticed,
because most of the victims do not want to talk about it mainly ages 16 to 24. Teenagers are at a
vulnerable age, still getting used to hormones, puberty, and emotions. They are not able to cope
with certain situations that they are confronted with such as violence between their
boyfriend/girlfriend. Once physical contact between the teenage couple begins, it is hard to stop
or recover. This is a problem because when it involves the health and safety of adolescents, it
doesnt get the attention it needs. Teenage domestic violence needs to gain awareness so
teenagers will become conscious of what behavior is considered appropriate when in a
relationship with another teen and also receive the help that teenagers which are being abused
need, so they will avoid depression or anxiety, avoid drug/alcohol use, avoid becoming antisocial, and avoid thoughts about attempting suicide.
Teens experience violence in their relationships at a higher rate than any other age
group (King-Ries, 132). Most of the time some teenagers do not know that they are in an
abusive relationship. The victim, usually a girl or woman, would use excuses such as, He says it
wont happen again, or thats just how he is, or even he is going through something. This

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generation is all about boys/young men telling girls what they want to hear. For example, if a guy
is in a relationship just to have sex and the girl says no, it can cause the boy to get angry and hit
the girl or worse. Unhealthy relationships can start early and last a lifetime. Teens often think
some behaviors, like teasing and name calling, are a "normal" part of a relationship. However,
these behaviors can become abusive and develop into more serious forms of violence (Teen
Dating Violence, CDC). According to this article from the Violence Prevention at CDC
website, it informs us that teens think some behaviors are normal and do not pay attention to
those small things until they build up. Destructive conflicts tactics can be hurtful to
relationships and individuals, with approximately 35-40% of adolescents experience physical or
emotional abuse from romantic partners (Simon, 2010).
When one is in an abusive relationship, she is embarrassed to tell anyone or is scared of
what will happen if the abuser finds out that someone else knows besides him and her. The
amount of people who told someone is very low so that is one of the reasons why teenage
domestic violence is hidden because just the relationship knows about the abuse. Only 33% of
teens who were in a violent relationship ever told anyone about the abuse (Youtube, Teenage
Domestic Violence). Why do these people stay in abusive relationships? There are many
explanations to why one doesnt leave the relationship. One is that emotions interfere such as
fear, embarrassment, low self-esteem, and even love. Another reason why people stay is because
the pressure is on their shoulders such as social or peer pressure, cultural or religious reasons,
and being pregnant or already have a childmost stay because the safety of their children or so
the child can have both mom and dad. One big reason is the distrust of adults or authority
because "eight States in the U.S. do not consider a violent dating relationship domestic abuse.
Therefore, adolescents, teens, and mid-twenties are unable to apply for a restraining order for

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protection from the abuser (Teen Dating Violence, DoSomething). This affects how teenagers
handle problems in the abusive relations because many teens and young adults do not feel that
the police can or will help them. A teens confusion about the law and their desire for
confidentiality are two of the most significant barriers stopping young victims of abuse from
seeking help (Dating Abuse Statistics, LoveisRespect). Last but not least they stay because they
rely on the aggressive partner, whether its lack of money, nowhere to go, or disability.
Being in an abusive relationship is hard because most of the victims dont know until
something, such as hitting, happens. A teenage girl named Hanna from United States, was a
victim of teenage partner abuse. Her story is heartbreaking.
When I started college, I met this really great guy. I had dated him for over a year
when he started becoming very controlling and manipulative of me. I could tell he
was very insecure about himselfhe'd always tell me never to look another man
in his eyes or be in a room alone with another guy. He picked me up one night
after class, drove me to a desolate park, and beat the life out of me. I somehow
managed to convince him to spare my life. I left him out of fear that the next time
he might just kill me. Every day is a constant battle with myself, trying to
overcome the pain from this horrible thing. It would have been so much easier if I
hadn't loved and trusted him so much. The courts are still figuring out what to do
with him (Teenage Abuse Stories).
There are ways to avoid being in an abusive relationship. There are signs that one should
pay attention to. If the guy is constantly texting or calling one to find out where the girl is at or
who she is with, he is controlling the relationship which is one of the signs. If the girl starts
notices that the abuser is blaming his problems on other people or her for making him treat her

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badly or tries to control what she and who she gets to see, those are the signs of an abusive
person. That person will be trying to control and be the dominant one in the relationship. One
might ask, why me? there can be many different reasons why one is abusive. Some of them are
that the partner is aggressive, using drugs or illegal substance, have conflicts with the partner, or
even witnessing or experiencing violence within the home. So before being in a relationship find
out dislike and likes, learn how manage jealousy or anger, and be able to communicate with
partner. (Teen Dating Violence, CDC)
Some might say that its not only young women getting abused, young men are also being
abused in teenage relationships. Both boys and girls are abused but bots usually tend to start the
violence and use greater force (Teen Relationship Abuse, WebMD). However, the percent of
boys getting abused is lower than the percent of girls being abused. A 2011 CDC nationwide
survey found that 23% of females and 14% of males who ever experienced rape, physical
violence, or stalking by an intimate partner (Teen Dating Violence, CDC).
Victims of teenage partner abuse deserve his or her self-respect and dignity. Everyone
should be treated with respect. Dating violence can be prevented when teens, families,
communities, and organizations work together and carry out more effective prevention strategies
and get others involved in raising awareness in teenage domestic violence. This is why teenage
domestic violence needs to gain attention because it will help teenagers in relationships with
another teen, and it will help them avoid being in an abusive relationship and also find love and
be happy.

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Words Cited
"Teen Dating Violence." Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Centers for Disease
Control and Prevention, 26 Nov. 2014. Web. 11 Feb. 2015.
"Teenage Domestic Violence (PSA)." YouTube. YouTube, 6 Feb. 2013. Web. 12 Feb. 2015.
"11 Facts About Teen Dating Violence." 11 Facts About Teen Dating Violence. N.p., n.d. Web. 11
Feb. 2015.
"Teen Relationship Abuse." WebMD. WebMD, 08 Feb. 2001. Web. 17 Feb. 2015.
Halket, Megan, et al. "Stay With Or Leave The Abuser? The Effects Of Domestic Violence
Victim's Decision On Attributions Made By Young Adults." Journal Of Family Violence
29.1 (2014): 35-49. Academic Search Premier. Web. 17 Feb. 2015.
"Dating Abuse Statistics." Www.loveisrespect.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 11 Feb. 2015.
King-Ries, Andrew. "Teens, Technology, And Cyberstalking: The Domestic Violence Wave Of
The Future?." Texas Journal Of Women & The Law 20.2 (2011): 131-164. Academic
Search Premier. Web. 12 Feb. 2015.
Simon, Valerie A., and Wyndol Furman. "Interparental Conflict And Adolescents' Romantic
Relationship Conflict." Journal Of Research On Adolescence (Wiley-Blackwell) 20.1
(2010): 188-209. Academic Search Premier. Web. 12 Feb. 2015.
"Why Do People Stay in Abusive Relationships?" Www.loveisrespect.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 16
Feb. 2015.
"Teenage Abuse Stories: Learn About Teen Abuse from BeingGirl." Teenage Abuse Stories:
Learn About Teen Abuse from BeingGirl. N.p., n.d. Web. 05 May 2015.