Topic: Personal Awareness Essay

Class: Examining Social Problems in Canada SOC73030

Professor: G. Johnstone
Name: Heather Browne 5893177
Date: September 23, 2015

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Intro
When I was younger the one thing that I always longed for was grandparents. My
parents were older and as such, their parents were long gone by the time I came
along. That was the story anyway. At the same time, there was this old lady,
affectionately known as Browne. Kind of like Madonna, known by a single name. She
was ahead of her time. She was old, totally blind, and not mobile. As a child I never
really articulated who she was but I figured that she must be close since we shared
a name. Many years later I would come to learn that Browne was my great aunt on
my fathers side, and also my great grandmother on my mothers side.
In her later years, Browne was being taken care of by one of my cousins, Earlene.
She was a young woman who had a job, a boyfriend, and a life of her own. The care
of Browne then, was not necessarily a priority for her. Browne spent her entire days
all alone inside the house. At the time, the gravity of this situation never resonated
with me. Being totally blind, and probably dealing with other health issues, leaving
on her own was not an option. As an adult, I was able to reassess these events with
a more seasoned eye, and I could only imagine the loneliness she must have felt,
how hungry she must have been. Was she sad? Did she get mad? Was she scared?
Did she ever scream for help? Looking back, I can now understand that her
caretaker was anything but.
With my adult eyes, I had to come to the painful realization that Browne was a
victim of elder abuse. While there was nothing I could do about it at the time, I still
feel a certain amount of guilt on behalf of the child I was then; a child who didnt
understand the unspeakable abuse that was happening, and the disregard at the
hands of many who choose to look the other way.

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Gut Reaction
I have learned many thing as I tried to battle the thorns of adulthood in a family that
was filled with secrets; and also not very nurturing. And there were even more
lessons to be learned once I realized that those secrets and lies were going to play a
part in my life whether I wanted them to or not. One realization that I came to was
that holding on to unaired grudges and resentments only served to create wounds
in the holder. In recognizing that I did not need those wounds, I also recognized that
I was not in a position to judge anyone elses actions, no matter how egregious and
morally corrupt. What right did I have to question someones motives; or to
speculate on the path that would involuntarily inform their decisions?
It is my belief that no action is ever totally isolated. I have learned that everything is
connected; and even when we may choose not to acknowledge it, many forces
conspire to create any one event. With that in mind, I am never quick to judge any
person or the actions that they exhibit. For people who abuse the elderly, my initial
reaction, after concern for the victim, would be pity. How can they not be pitied? It
would be the same for a child molester. I do not believe anyones goal at the start of
the day is to render bodily harm to another human being. So then, how does it
happen, and why? It is a known fact that victimizers have often been victims at
some point before their initial transgression. I say this not to excuse or justify their
actions, after many actions cannot be justified nor should they. It is then to point out

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that human beings are complex creatures; and whether we care to see it or not, we
are affected by everything around us.

Personal Experience
Browne was young once, and she had 2 sons. From the stories I have heard, she
loved one more than the other and wasnt shy about showing it. The less
appreciated son would eventually leave the country to seek his fortunes elsewhere,
he never looked back. The other son did the same but returned and stayed. In all
the years I had known him, I had never known him to have any contact with
Browne.
As the years went on, I would learn many earth-shattering things; for example, Mr.
Inniss, the village shopkeeper who I interacted with quite often, was, in fact,
Brownes son and my grandfather. He was an enigma, if there ever was one. He was
married and had about ten children with his wife, six of whom were his biological
children. My mother and her sister, children from a previous relationship were never
considered a part of his family. This was the reason why I never knew that he was
my grandfather. To this day, I still do not know what event brought Mr. Inniss to
make the choices that he did.
I have often wondered what the grievance must have been against his mother, and
also my biological grandmother, to cause him to cut them out of his circle. Surely,
with such an astronomical level of indifference there must have been a long list of
grudges hidden somewhere. Whatever they were, they blinded him to common
decency, and to forget all the times his mother gave selflessly to her beloved.
And then there is Earlene, how was she chosen to be Brownes caretaker? It was
quite obvious that she did not seek out the position, or wanted it, for that matter. As
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little as she did, and even with her neglect, she probably wondered why she was the
only one who contributed to Brownes care. And that would have been a very valid
concern. In many ways, it was easy to see how Earlene might have been a victim
herself. No one asked her how she was doing, or how her charge was doing; and as
a result she learned that not one cared. There was not accountability on any level.

Ethical Dilemma
There are many ethical dilemmas that surround the issue of elder abuse, namely,
whether right to die legislation should be instated; euthanasia; and to some extent,
organ donation. All of the peripheral issues surrounding this larger one are ones
which we, as a society, refuse to discuss in any productive way. Fearing all the
slippery slope arguments, politicians, legislators and decision makers tend to steer
clear of these issues hoping the next flare up would just die down. But we need to
ask ourselves, why animals are afforded more dignity with end-of-life issues than
humans. That does not necessarily speak well of our humanity and our morality.
Whenever that are discussions around euthanasia, there is the usual concern of
whether the door will be opened for more abuse on a much larger scale. There are
concerns with doctor-assisted suicide and whether that could also be abused?
Should euthanasia be an option that exist in the right circumstances? These are all
questions that would benefit from a frank discussion, instead of avoidance.
Of course, it is understandable that these topics are treated the way they are. After
all, if such laws were to be put on the books, how would they be implemented? Who
would be the decision-makers? Would there be over-sight? How would these issues
be dealt with in different segments of the population? Would there be varying levels
of treatment for the rich and the poor?
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In recent years there have been many cases that have shone a spotlight on these
issues, but because of the very thin moral line that can easily be crossed, legislators
usually steer clear. Of course, society is always advancing and changing for the
better; and it is very likely that these topics will be given more consideration in the
years to come. As time goes on, new information will come to light, and other
factors will present themselves that would make this topic impossible to ignore.

Conclusion
I consider myself to be quite even-tempered and emotionally stable. This does not
mean that I am never affected by the things I might encounter; instead, it means
that as a result of years of experience, I have learned how to manage my emotions
with considerations of appropriateness in mind. I am willing to admit that my
reaction is not a normal or popular one, but I have chosen to make changes in my
life based on the lessons that I have learned. These changes have given me some
perspective and a different way of looking at many issues. If I am faced with a reallife instance of elder abuse I will be more inclined to delve into the psychology of
the parties involved, rather than internalizing someone elses story and making it
about myself.

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