Daniel Fitzgerald

Psychology 1100
Section Two Person Paper

Tears. Lots and lots of tears. We find our subject, five-year-old Joe, standing in the
middle of the kitchen screaming and sobbing. Ben, his father, isnt exceptionally concerned with
the latest tantrum as they seem to be happening far too often over the most trivial things. He
closes his eyes and exaggerates a sigh. What is it now Joe? Why cant you give me a few damn
minutes of quiet? breathed Ben.
He turned around to see Joe trying to take the lid off of a sippy cup. Ben stepped toward
his son to help, but Joe refused. It became an awkward, childish struggle for control of the cup
Ben simply frustrated and Joe not mature enough to escape perseveration (Perseveration, Ch. 5,
pg. 179, tendency to stick to one thought or action evident when children are furious when
told to stop what they are doing). Joes screaming intensified, the lid flew off and grape juice
poured all over them. During the scuffle, Joe hit his father in the face; the blow to his face
coupled with the spilled grape juice and weeks of stress and single-parenting ignited Bens rage.
He jumped up cursing loudly, grabbed his son by the arm, lifted the flailing child up off the floor,
and struck him multiple times. By now, Bens two teenage daughters had come into the kitchen
to see the commotion. Hillary, the oldest, yelled at her father to stop. The middle child Nancy
stared, eyes wide and jaw dropped. They had never seen this side of their dad. Ben let go of his
son who dropped to the floor still screeching. The girls just stood there in shock as Ben stormed
to his bedroom and slammed the door. Hillary hurried to her brother, scooped him up, and

attempted to comfort him. The rest of the day was spent in near silence as the family processed
the experience.
The next day, Leslie arrived home after several weeks in the state capitol. She had
recently begun her second term as the state treasurer and had to be at the statehouse for obvious
reasons. Our ambitious Leslie had always put her career first which strained her relationship with
Ben and the kids. Ben had grudgingly become a stay-at-home dad years ago and had been
accumulating resentment since the compromise. In her absence, he truly felt as though he were
losing his mind. This barely functioning marriage had taken its toll on the family, but none more
so than faultless Joe.
It was a peculiar to enter such a quiet house. In fact, Leslie had never experienced such
silence in this zoo she called home. Stopping in the living room, she let her luggage fall to the
floor with a thud. Hello? she called, Is anyone home? Nothing. She sauntered off to her
bedroom, exhausted. Ben, however, had different plans. Leslie knew something was amiss when
she entered the bedroom and was ignored. Within two minutes, silence turned into an explosive
verbal skirmish. Ben accused Leslie of neglect and selfishness; Leslie lobbed charges of self-pity
and jealousy and abuse. Neither was capable of reason. All that was left were tears and blank
staresthe product of a marriage in ruins.
Over the next few weeks, Ben and Leslie began to separate themselves without bringing
in lawyers. They tried to remain civil and keep up appearances, but there was no hiding the
animosity or tension. They wanted to mitigate the damages their dysfunction had caused the
children (Tertiary Prevention, Ch.5, pg. 174, actions that are taken after an adverse event
such as abuse that are aimed at reducing harm or preventing disability), and though their

intentions were noble, the damage had already been done. The two teenage daughters were far
less affected, but Joe was still young and impressionable. He yelled just like his parents. He used
their same phraseology and had acquired the vindictive, nasty vocabulary (Scaffolding, Ch. 5,
pg. 185, in this case, inadvertently helping a child to learn something with direct guidance
or through example). Hillary thought it was hilarious, but Leslie was mortified when Joe swore
at a woman when they were out shopping. Eventually, Joe learned that this was unacceptable
behavior, but not until a dozen or so strangers had been cursed out by a sailor in a toddlers body.
We jump ahead three years. Joe was now eight years old and splitting his time between
his parents. Ben and Leslie never really worked out their issues and their exchanges were
insufferable. In addition to the circus that was Ben and Leslie, Joe had to deal with two very
opposite parenting styles. Leslie didnt discipline much; she let her kids make their own choices
and didnt expect much from them. This relaxed environment was intended to foster honesty and
openness between her and her children, but it became a free-for-all in her home. Her children did
as they pleased and got into a lot of trouble. Ben was the dictator of his home. He spoke and it
was law, and there were harsh punishments for breaking Bens laws (Authoritarian parenting,
Ch. 6, pg. 217, an approach to parenting characterized by high behavioral standards, strict
punishment, and little communication). Of course the kids were always breaking his rules. He
grounded them, took away cell phones and toys, and actually locked them in their rooms to
discipline. Joe hated staying with his father. It was an unhappy, unloving setting. The family
situation only created confusion for our subject.
Between his two homes, Joe was lost in the mixmom too busy with her career, and dad
wallowing in misery. He had had trouble in school before, but his behavior became more

antisocial. Leslie received multiple phone calls from the principal informing her that Joe had hit
another student, pushed someone down the stairs, and on one terrible occasion repeatedly struck
another student with a stapler fully intending to draw blood (Antisocial behavior, Ch. 6, pg.
226, feelings of dislike or even hatred for another person). Leslie being the passive parent,
didnt investigate much into these events. Joe told her that his victims made him mad, and that
was enough of an explanation for her. Boys will be boys. After the stapler incident, Joe was
suspended for a week. Leslie knew that if Ben found out, he would punish Joe with a beating.
Instead, she let the eight-year old spend the week at home alone while she was working. He
learned nothing from the suspension and felt even more alone and unloved.
To the Knopes, this was business as usual. Leslie and Ben knew they could be better
parents but assumed every parent felt this way. Joe was a kid from a dysfunctional and flawed
family system, but wasnt everyone? They assumed he would grow out of it and get his act
together. In their apathy, Joes parents were guilty of neglect. Here was a young boy lacking
direction, example, and encouragement. He was left to fend for himself most of the time
making dinner, doing homework, laundry, and getting to and from school (Child neglect, Ch. 6,
pg. 232, failure to meet a childs basic physical, educational, or emotional needs). It may
have seemed trivial to his parents, because they felt he was old enough to handle the
responsibility. Perhaps Joe was capable of surviving on his own, but without support and devoid
of affection Joe was positively neglected. This type of maltreatment is far more common than
any other, but is less likely to be realized. Leslie and Joe believed themselves to be doing the best
they could yet their efforts were minimal and inadequate. They had failed to help their youngest
child develop the skills to deal with life.

Another year gone, and Joe was now nine years old. Although he suffered years of
neglect at the hands of his parents, Joe had made friends and was slowly changing his behavior
with the help of his sister Nancy. Ben was out of the picture by now with Leslie rarely present.
He was a very active boy, yet reserved and introspective. Leslie grew concerned that there was
something wrong with her sonher actions weighing heavily on her conscious. She noticed that
over the span of about ten minutes, Joe could go from over-the-top happy and hyper, to silent and
despondent (Bipolar disorder, Ch. 7, pg. 272, a condition characterized by extreme mood
swings from euphoria to deep depression not caused by outside experiences). Like any
parent with a computer and an overactive imagination, she entered her sons symptoms into a
search engine and moments later Bipolar Disorder in big bold letters flashed onto the screen.
After a few minutes of investigation, Leslie was on the phone with the family physician
scheduling an appointment for an evaluation.
A week later, the doctor rejected the notion that Joe had bipolar disorder but still referred
Joe to a psychologist. After several sessions, the psychologist sat down with Leslie and proposed
that Joe was lagging behind his peers in cognition. It was nothing to be too concerned about, but
Joes inability to ignore stimuli would overwhelm him. Instead of blocking out certain things,
Joes attention was constantly being pulled in different directions. Leslie shook her head, So its
ADHD. What medication can we put him on to get rid of it? The psychologist explained to
Leslie that he could not prescribe medication and didnt believe it was ADHD anyway. Joe had
suffered some trauma and needed some time to catch up. His inability to ignore stimuli was just a
sign that Joe hadnt fully developed selective attention yet (Selective Attention, Ch. 7, pg. 256,
the ability to concentrate on some stimuli while ignoring others). So when he got

overwhelmed by the activity around him, he became quiet and idle. It was his way of dealing
with the stress. The psychologist was actually shocked that instead of violence, like Joe had used
in the past, his reaction to overstimulation was calm and mature. Joe had clearly shown his
resilience in righting the wrongs that had been done.
During these sessions, Joe had showcased a remarkable ability in metacognition. When
he became too excited by his environment, Joe would shut down in order to protect himself. It
appeared as if he was just unresponsive and absent, but the psychologist realized that Joe was
thinking about his too many thoughts. His body was motionless, but his mind was attempting to
circumvent the myriad stimuli. Joes mind was aware of the overload, evaluating the options,
working through the noise, and deciding how best to make his way through it (Metacognition,
Ch. 7, pg. 258, the ability to evaluate a cognitive task and how best to accomplish it and
adjust ones performance on that task). To the psychologist, it was an impressive adaptation to
the situation Joe was in. Joe was not a victim; he had overcome significant adversity and fared
well. He was resilient. (Resilience, Ch. 8, pg. 287, the capacity to adapt well to significant
adversity and to overcome serious stress)
Another year passed and Joe had reached ten years of age. Joe had come a long way from
the neglect and antisocial behavior of his younger childhood. Fortunately for him, his parents had
come to a truce. They were cordial and respectful when they spoke to and about each other. The
years apart had lessened the disdain allowing for a somewhat healthy working relationship. Joe
lived with his mother and middle sister, Nancy. Leslie had been reelected to office and was
unsurprisingly absent. Nancy was twenty-two and attending college; she was Joes stand-in
parent. It was not an ideal situation, but they made it work. She made sure he did his homework,

got on the bus and made it home safely, spent time with friends, and helped take care of all Joes
basic needs. Joe typically saw his mother on the weekend and his father on holidays. This could
be classified as an extended family structure with a non-parent adult taking the lead. Even though
Joe was still living at least part of the time with a parent, they were minimally involved in taking
care of his needs (Extended Family, Ch. 8, pg. 294, a family that includes non-parental
adults all under one roof). The relationship between Joe and his sister/guardian was similar to
one between friends; Joe talked to her about everything and didnt fear punishment or retribution.
Nancy delighted in her role as Joes caretaker. They became very close and would remain that
way for life.
The outlook for Joe was dim at age five. His mother was absent, his father was abusive,
he was expressing intense antisocial behaviors, and he had begun to imitate the destructive
conduct of his parents interactions. All of the conflict he had witnessed would normally lead to
delinquency and emotional development difficulties (Family Trouble, Ch. 8, pgs. 302-303,
factors interfering with family function such as poverty and high conflict). His resiliency
and the love of his sister saved Joe from almost certain self-destruction.
Although Joes story has turned out favorably thus far, not all children are that lucky. It is
clear that nurture plays a huge part in developing a happy, healthy child. Joes troubles were
overwhelmingly the consequence of external deficiencies. At each stage of growth into middle
childhood, the family and environmental conditions seemed to be the greatest factors in deciding
how a child would progress. I am confident that the role of our upbringing is greater than that of
our genetic makeup in relation to human development. I am inclined to agree most with Watsons

behaviorist approach that the,failure to bring up a happy child, a well-adjusted child

assuming bodily healthfalls squarely upon the parents shoulders. (Ch.4, pg. 151)