Rubio 1

Rubio, Sebastian
Professor Matthew Wilson
Writing 2
30 May 2016
Revised: Translation Analysis: How to Build a Green City
For the translation assignment, I took the simplicity recommendations my professor gave
me and I used it for my overall creation. Therefore along the lines of keeping things simple, I
chose to translate a peer reviewed book that explores the recommendations of constructing a
sustainably aggregated and urbanized city, into that of a simple childrens book. A picture book
should retain the information necessary to foster consideration for our environment without
boring and compromising the learning experience for the reader. To clarify, the book is intended
for children 7 and up with the option of having an adult read it to them. In order to meet the
demands of the new genre I had to incorporate more of an emotional appeal through the images
drawn, I also had to take the big points of the book and synthesize them into small rhythmic
fragments. The childrens how to book, will attempt to evoke change and help the young
generation realize that weve got so little time to react to our mistakes. Our environment can only
withstand so much, its up the collective good to maintain its purity. Its important that children
are taught eco-friendly manners at a young age in order to prevent them from being a part of the
increasing world of contaminators.
The new audience differs from the original in terms of the overall academic rigor. The peer
reviewed journal consists of high academic diction and it goes into great depth about the set list
of requirements needed to construct an urban and sustainable city. The original book also

Rubio 2

contains illustrations based on blueprints and infrastructure assessments of wiring. The new
genre attempts to elicit a similar purpose as the peer reviewed book, through a different
community. The childrens book condenses the arguments made and transforms them into a
simpler version (Zinsser).
This book would most likely be found in schools or libraries found in an affluent community
where they have time to worry about other things beside the standard of living. The peer
reviewed book has a length of about 250 pages, whereas the picture book has 12 pages. In order
to transfer the core theory of the paper I had to set aside, the steps necessary to yield the desired
outcome. Essentially I just made sure to dissect the main points from the entire book, and I
integrated them into my childrens book, making it a rhyming How to book. Focusing less on
the academic portion of my subject and more on the translation as instructed, I took out all the
jargon from the book, stripped unnecessary political and economic implications involved. These
were removed because children of the age targeted by my book, dont worry about such things at
that age. Theyre just concerned with having a good time, which is why I created a project that
will meet their entertainment requirements while getting my message across. Another thing that I
had to change in the text was that the illustrations provided were too complex to understand. For
my childrens book I had to draw pictures that overpowered the words and actually made sense
to 9 year olds.
Generally, I think the translation was successful, the context of the new genre is simple
and I hope that it would inspire the younger generation to want a more eco-friendly world. My
concept and translation of the peer reviewed book was simple, yet it managed to maintain an
authoritative voice in its context through its instructional format. In the actual translation I would
say that Im used to more academic portions of work than artistic ones. It became difficult when

Rubio 3

I had to draw pictures, as I cannot draw, and even much more when I had to translate a book into
a few simple sentences.
A concern of mine was if the children reading this would be fascinated by its overall
context? And, would it help them aspire to be more sustainable? In the end, I would hope so but I
dont think there is any skill set that would force them to, as advanced persuasion methods arent
understood by that audience yet. The skills needed to translate the journal would be to have a
keen perception of simplicity and the ability to draw. Another major concern, was understanding
the full context of the book. In Mike Bunns How to Read Like a Writer, he instructs the reader
about a particular matter, and how its not necessary to retain a lot of the wording since its not
always useful. For the biggest portion of my project, I had to read and highlight only important
things I would use.
The two most important decisions in accomplishing this translation were deciding what
age group this book would be created for and the steps that would have to be omitted from the
actual translation. I had to change the age group since the prompt was to appeal and target a new
audience. I changed this like I stated before, by just simplifying everything. The information
omitted was changed little by little. At first my original book included much more steps in the
urbanization process, then after learning from Anne Lamott in Shitty First Drafts that we should
remove confusing and extra info. I finally ended with a few pages that mentioned the most basic
steps to build a city.
The book aims to transform large ideas into pictures for a younger public to understand.
After reading Kerry Dirks Navigating Genres, I knew that the conventions building the
arguments made would be skewed but much like that of different discourse communities
interpreting evidence the rhetoric would not change much. The purpose in the book is to help

Rubio 4

build more sustainable cities, and in a less contextualized way so does the childrens book, even
though its simpler, the rhetoric behind both of them overlaps. Having formatted something like
this, we can hope for the future to be a more sustainable and urban setting.

Rubio 5

Bibliography
1. Bunn, Mike. "How to Read Like a Writer." Writing Spaces: Readings on Writing. Vol. 2. West
Lafayette, IN: Parlor, 2010. 71-85. Print.
2. Dirk, Kerry. "Navigating Genres." Writing Spaces: Readings on Writing. Vol. 1. West
Lafayette, IN: Parlor, 2010. 249-62. Print.
3. Frey, Hildebrand. "Designing the City." Scribd. E & FN Spon, n.d. Web. 01 June 2016.
4. Lamott, Anne. "Shitty First Drafts. Language Awareness: Readings for College Writers. Ed.
by Paul Eschholz, Alfred Rosa, and Virginia Clark. 9th ed. Boston: Bedford/St. Martins,
2005: 93-96.
5. Zinsser, William. "Simplicity." Simplicity. New York: Harper & Row, 1980. Web. 02 June
2016.