Donald Dye 11/10/12

Social Gratification and Acceptance Through Online Social Networking A look at how societys new addiction has psychological explanations

Everyday people use impression management in order to mandate a certain response from the peers around them. We look at others for reflected appraisals to find acceptance or social gratification. In this evolving technological society there is no wonder that these same sociological concepts are being translated into our online social networks such as twitter and Facebook. In person, sometimes it is a little difficult to portray our ideal or even real selves, whether through appearance, mannerisms, or personality, but online this is a whole different story. Online, users have the ability to present the best and most ideal self and filter out the parts that they dont like. It is often easier to create your ideal image online than to be that ideal self in person and this is why. As a result, societys addiction to online social networks does not always stem from just being connected, but instead, there is a hidden drive that cause this want for connection. We look to our online social networks as a means for social gratification and acceptance. Social gratification is something that everyone is in search of both deliberately and passively. Without even realizing why, our moods can change just by one evil glare or smile. It is human nature to look for reflected appraisals from our friends and even strangers to build self-esteem and even happiness. In short, social gratification is this feeling of confidence or acceptance we are looking to receive from our peers. In general social networking

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can refer to any social structure in which we interact with other people through communication and impression management, but more in particular I want to focus on this idea of social networking online. Facebook and twitter have created a completely new realm of opportunity and sociological development when it comes to social networking, because the personal element of interacting in person is gone. In order to fully understand the impacts of online social networking on our society, I want to mainly focus on its effects on young adults and adolescents. How our transition in social communication and interaction has become dehumanized with the boom of online technology. This explosion of social networking online is shifting social connections and creating priority in building one s online image. To add some background to my focus group of young adults, it is crucial to understand this phase in social development and realize the sad truth that they are the target of online social networking. Young adults and even adolescents face constant change and submersion into new social situations. There is a shift in sociological interaction that brings saliency to increasing connections with our social world than with our family, and by understanding that there are many emotions and desires that come with these new, social situations, we can assume that there are desires to fit in and create a sort of image online. On Facebook and Twitter it is so easy to present a filtered image of who we really are on the internet. In real-life we may appear awkward or ugly but in cyberspace we can manage our appearances to present our ideal self. This

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online image that we create is almost a filtered version of ourselves which can contribute to social gratification and acceptance. In 1959, Erving Goffman made significant studies in impression management in his book, The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life (Goffman, 1959). His insight revealed the sort of theatrical performance we put on to make ourselves appear or act a certain way in order to feel accepted or cool. Basically, impression management is a fancy way of describing how people subconsciously make decisions and present themselves in a way that is believed to maintain their image. It has been many years since Goffman presented his ideas, but it is safe to say that these same concepts are translated in the way we present ourselves online. In the New York Times, Stephanie Rosenbloom discusses the link between impression management and online social networking in her article Putting Your Best Cyberface Forward. Rosenbloom says, Now that first impressions are often made in cyberspace, not face-to-face, people are not only strategizing about how to virtually convey who they are, but also grappling with how to craft an e-version of themselves that appeals to multiple audiences--co-workers, fraternity brothers, Mom and Dad (Rosenbloom, 2008). Through Goffmans concepts of impression management and this new source of networking, users are constantly trying to present this perfectly crafted e-version of themselves in order to maintain the appeals of different audiences on the internet. In such an online focused social sphere, many times we make assumptions of our social standing by the small things like the amount of friends we

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have on Facebook and as a result this creates this thought in our heads that in order to be popular or cool we need to have this popularity on our social networks. How many likes, comments, retweets, and favorites, often makes us feel accepted and liked by the our friends and followers online. Often without knowing it I myself judge my online friends on their coolness by how many friends they have and the amount of feedback they receive on their posts. A study by Ohio State University revealed an interesting correlation that those with lower self-esteem have more friends on Facebook than those of higher self-esteem (Lee, Moore, Park, Park, 2007). Though this is somewhat surprising to the average online user, it actually still supports this idea of social gratification. In somewhat abstract thinking, it can be related that people with lower self-esteem are looking for social gratification somewhere and they try to fulfill these desire by becoming popular on Facebook and twitter. Users that have a larger number of friends are in search of social gratification on their Facebook or twitter accounts, because they feel like if they appear cool online, this will improve how their friends perceive them in the real-world. By attempting to fill a void in their confidence online, users with more friends and low self-esteem are somehow translating their social struggle in real-life interaction by trying to become more popular online and using this as an outlet to fit in. On Facebook, it seems like once you become friends with someone, its likely that you will always be friends with them. Friendships may change in real-life, and new opportunities may separate us from the ones whom we are

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close with, but on Facebook, they will always be there. Unlike in real-life, it is not often that people delete the friends that they have lost, instead they can follow them and see what changes are going on in their lives. Facebook lets us inconspicuously peer into the lives of our friends, new and old, and almost unconsciously we find social gratification from this. Users continue to use Facebook because it enables them to both maintain contact with offline friends and peers and to keep up-to-date on their friends activities and events. (Quan-Haase, Young, 2010) After high school everyone goes off in their different directions, but unlike our parents, 21st century technology has transformed communication and connectivity to allow us to remain connected with these people and keep up with our old and new friends. In times when users get lonely and reminiscent, these feelings can be fulfilled just a click away by catching up with old friends. Nowadays, anyone from a little sister to even your grandparents and parents are choosing to join the online social scene, but why? Now having over 800 million active users on Facebook, there has emerged this socially constructed theory that stresses for those who wish to be socially connected, to conform and become one of the 800 million active users. This socially constructed theory that Facebook is awesome! has created this idea that if you do not have a Facebook, that you are for some reason missing out. Reality is, no one wants to miss out on the new fad and in a technologically growing society, social media is taking over. By becoming part of this somewhat new and evolving form of communication and interaction, you are giving in

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to the socially constructed idea and unconsciously gaining social gratification from becoming a member of the out-group to becoming a member of the in-group and a member of our online society. Facebook a socially constructed technology and best analyzed by actor-network theory, but it also represents a paradigm shift in thinking the intersection of social and technological in the form of cyborging of the mind: Facebook operates as instrumental aspect of social knowledge and an extension of participant personality. Users are comfortable with, desire, and downright require the dynamic and emergent (permanently beta) nature of the Facebook socio-technical collage (Ginger, 2011) Someone might argue that instead of searching for social gratification on Facebook, that users just want to be connected, but dont these go handin-hand? It seems being connected has been attempting to transform itself from a verb to a underlying psychological feeling. Being connected is the action people are taking while on social networking websites but what I am investigating, is the psychological undertow that stems from being connected and answering the why? question that draws society online to Facebook and twitter. We all know it, Facebook and twitter are distracting, it seems as though anytime you desperately need to be productive, you become hungry for social networking sites, regardless if there is actually anything interesting going on on your newsfeed. There is obviously a psychological appeal that Facebook and Twitter have that creates this hunger every time we connect and this appeal comes from the social gratification we receive from Facebook

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and Twitter. Our society has focused on this 21st century image that we are always connected and though this is true in regards to our constant addiction to social networking, the actual psychological tie that feeds our hunger for connection is our societys focus on social gratification and acceptance. This connectivity is one of the most important aspects of fulfilling users needs for social interaction over the internet. Only a decade ago, it seems as though we were in the dinosaur ages before this boom of online social networking; instead of instant chatting or messaging, to converse with friends, you would have to spend time conversing over the phone or emailing your friends, but now it has never been easier to talk and socialize with online friends, near or far at lightning fast speeds. With the rapid evolution of the internet, our society has this psychological need to be connected and with the addition of a more social media based internet community, these psychological needs are met with the internets ability to connect people from opposite ends of the world. If for some reason you are having a bad day or feel depressed, and you are in search of someone to talk to- maybe desiring comfort or even if you are just bored, social networks like Facebook can connect you with friends anywhere in the world. In this advancing online community it is easier than ever to fulfill your social hunger. Facebook and twitter have made talking to your friends, or even your mother just a click away. With instant online messaging on Facebook and even conversations on twitter, everything is transmitted at lightning speeds making a quick conversation or long discussion easier and simpler than ever. Talking to your

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mother or close friends on Facebook chat can easily change your mood and give social gratification. Facebook and Twitter are growing in popularity and addiction everyday, and it seems like these social networking sites are leading the change in the evolution of the internet into an interactive, 21st century tool, but what makes these sites so appealing to its users that cannot resist urges to logon multiple times a day? This idea of being connected is widely used today in describing our recent addictions to technology and the constantly evolving internet world, but behind this desire to be connected, there is an underlying social psychological reasoning. Online social networking has created a whole new social sphere to interact with your friends and even make new friends; separate from our everyday lives, and it has been observed that for some, this is an outlet for social acceptance. Whether its how many friends you have or the popularity of your posts, online social networking has opened a new realm for social critique and has constructed this idea of the cyberface; the image we create online in order to manage impressions and present our filtered, ideal self. With such a thriving social hierarchy online, it is no wonder why so many people work on their impression management in search of finding social inclusion online. There has evolved this socially constructed idea that we have to be a part of this rapidly growing social sphere online, in order to be relevant in society and this thirst has created an impulse for constant connection to online social networks. We are not only becoming a technological society, but an online one, and in this ever

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evolving world we face, our connected society is only going to get more extreme, and it is important to realize the social psychology behind our rapidly increasing addictions to these technologies and understand that behind our actions, there is thought and meaning. Though Facebook and twitter have revealed to be both positive and negative in its effects on our social world, they have created a whole new way to stay connected in a cyberspace that people look up towards for social gratification and acceptance.