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JVED SEVEN , . HOUSES BEFORE HE ' TURNED 17. BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL HE WROTI A LETTER TO SUZANNE AND JIM BANTE J^: FOUND/
amilies aren't perfect. Every teen who has argued with his or her parents over curfews, homework, and clothes knows that. But Alex Chivescu's (pronounced: shives-u) family life brings new meaning to the word "chaos." His birth parents divorced when Alex was an infant. His father was deported back to his native country of Romania and subsequently dropped out of Alex's life. His mother, a single parent, earned a Ph.D. in computer science, became a college professor, and learned to speak six languages. But when Alex was 9 years old, his mom was in a car accident. After the accident, she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, a mental illness causing sudden mood changes and uncontrollable behavior. As a result, Alex's relationship with his mother deteriorated. She verbally abused him, frequently lost her temper and threw things at him, and neglected him.
Bounced Around
In an effort to help Alex, government social-service authorities took him out of his home in Rochester Hills, Michigan, and placed him in foster care, in foster care, kids are taken in by other families or group homes on a temporary basis. But Alex's mom fought to have him returned to her and he was sent back to her several times. For eight years, Alex went back and forth between his mother's house, foster families, temporary shelters, and group homes. Including his mother's home, he lived in eight different places between ages 9 and 17. Living conditions were
Online Search
"I spent many hours searching for potential foster families, using the only resource I had: the Internet," Alex says. He made a list of families
ire these statements true or false? Answers are in the Teacher's Edition. Foster care is intended ( to permanently replace
ALEX NEVER LET HIS DIFFICULT UPBRINGING PREVENT HIM FROM SUCCEEDING IN SCHOOL.
a child's birth family. True Since moving In with the Bante family, Alex no longer keeps in contact with his birth family.
Second, Alex was determined to find a home on his terms. He sent dozens of letters to families near his school. It turned out that many families wished to adopt him, but Jim and Suzanne Bante were the lucky winners. They had raised four children, and Alex officially became their fifth.
helped Alex finish high school on a strong note. He is currently attending Harvard University. "I think taking control of my life that summer was the single biggest step I took towards achieving any of my later successes," he says. He found a new family, but that doesn't mean he's forgotten his old one. "I am still close with my grandparents back in Romania, and my foster family gives me space for my relationship with my mother," Alex says. "My mother will always be my mother." By court order, Alex was not allowed to contact his mother until he turned 18. "Since then, I have met with her several times," Alex says. "I will always offer her love and support, and honor her as my mother. Before the car accident, she raised me to be the man I am today. It was the values and morals she instilled in me that guided me when she was no longer able to." What has Alex learned from his up-and-down family life? "Take a moment to step back and look at the big picture," he says. "It's easy to throw your hands up in defeat and give up in the face of adversity, but the key is to accept what cannot be changed and fight for everything else that you can."
Zachary Jones
DISCI
What do you think of Alex's quest to find a foster family on his own? Based on information in the story, what difficulties did Alex face in completing his quest? How did he overcome the obstacles he faced? ~| At the end of the article. I Alex says it's important "to accept what cannot be changed and fight for everything else that can." What do you think he means?
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