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Attachment Assessment

Please answer all questions as truthfully and accurately as possible. 1. I dont like to show my emotions very much. 2. I like being alone much of the time. 3. I dont like asking for help from others. 4. I dont like to think of the past very much. 5. I secretly believe that my partners will leave me for someone else. 6. I rarely talk to my parents about my problems. 7. I leave relations quickly if I feel Im going to get hurt. 8. I rarely ask others out on a date; I usually wait for others to ask me. 9. Others describe me as not being very open and very distant. 10. I dont like conflicts or arguments: I usually shut down or leave. 11. I hate being alone. 12. I am constantly afraid that I will be abandoned by my partner. 13. I sometimes cant say no to my partner even if I dont want to do what they want. 14. I have stayed in a bad relationship rather than face being alone. 15. I tend to fall in love very quickly. 16. I constantly need to hear from my partner I love you. 17. I call my parents or go visit them a lot in times of stress. 18. I have very intense emotional reactions to stress. 19. Others have sometimes complained that I suffocate them in relationships. 20. I have done desperate things to get others to love me. 21. I dont know how to function in relationships. 22. I have a lot of fear in my life. 23. I have a love/hate relationship with my parents. 24. I have never felt very comfortable in relationships. 25. I have no idea of what type of person I am looking to fall in love with. 26. Memories of my childhood family really bother me sometimes. 27. My partners tell me that I am unpredictable and unstable. 28. I am confused about how to make friends. 29. I really dont know what others want from me in relationships. 30. When under stress I dont know what to do. T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F

31. I am open and honest about my feelings. 32. I am confident in my ability to make friends with others. 33. I can say no to others when they ask me to do things I dont want to do. 34. I have a good relationship with my parents. 35. If a relationship gets unhealthy, I leave it immediately. 36. I know exactly what I am looking for in a love partner. 37. I am not afraid to share my feelings in a relationship. 38. Others describe me as calm and in control. 39. I dont let others walk all over me. 40. I frequently consult others for counsel, even my parents, when under stress.

T T T T T T T T T T

F F F F F F F F F F

SCORING
Questions 1-10: Avoidant type. Add up the trues for a total score. Questions 11-20: Ambivalent type. Add up the trues for a total score. Questions 21-30: Disorganized type. Add up the trues for a total score. Questions 31-40. Secure type. Add up the trues for a total score. For each: 7-10 Ts: very strong tendency. 4-6 Ts: some traits. 0-3 Ts: minimal traits. You can score high in 2 or more categories. For example, you can be Secure 7 and Avoidant 5. This means that you are generally secure, but under stress or if you feel the relationship is deteriorating you may exhibit some avoidant characteristics. You can score high on 3 or more, but this is rare. This means that you really are not sure what you are and you may go back and forth between attachment styles. Ideally, you will be strong in one, and low on the other 3 attachment styles. This means that you know what you are and what you are not. You may ask your partner to take the test and see how similar or different they are from you.

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