A PROJECT ON

COMMUNICATIO N SKILLS

PREPARED BY:
RAKSHA MORE

INTRODUCTION
Communication is simply the act of transferring information from one place to another Although this is a simple definition, when we think about how we may communicate the subject becomes a lot more complex. There are various categories of communication and more than one may occur at any time. The different categories of communication are: Spo!en or "er#al Communication$ Face to Face, telephone, radio or television or other media. Non%"er#al Communication: !ody language, gestures, how we dress or act scent. &ritten Communication$ "etters, e mails, books, maga#ines, the $nternet or via other media. "isuali'ations$ %raphs, charts, maps, logos and other visuali#ations can communicate messages. &ommunication theory states that communication involves a sender and a receiver 'or receivers( conveying information through a communication channel. The desired outcome or goal of any communication process understands. The process of interpersonal communication cannot be regarded as a phenomenon which simply )happens), but should be seen as a process which involves participants negotiating their role in this process, whether consciously or unconsciously. even our

*enders and receivers are of course vital in communication. $n face to face communication the roles of the sender and receiver are not distinct as both parties communicate with each other, even if in very subtle ways such as through eye contact 'or lack of( and general body language. There are many other subtle ways that we communicate 'perhaps even unintentionally( with others, for example the tone of our voice can give clues to our mood or emotional state, whilst hand signals or gestures can add to a spoken message $n written communication the sender and receiver are more distinct. +ntil recent times, relatively few writers and publishers were very powerful when it came to communicating the written word. Today we can all write and publish our ideas on the $nternet, which has led to an explosion of information and communication possibilities.

THE COMMUNICATION PROCESS

Communication S!ills A message or communication is sent by the sender through a communication channel to a receiver, or to multiple receivers. The sender must encode the message 'the information being conveyed( into a form that is appropriate to the communication channel, and the receiver's( then decodes the message to understand its meaning and significance. ,isunderstanding can occur at any stage of the communication process. -ffective communication involves minimising potential misunderstanding and overcoming any barriers to communication at each stage in the communication process. An effective communicator understands their audience, chooses an appropriate

communication channel, hones their message to this channel and encodes the message to reduce misunderstanding by the receiver's(. They will also seek out feedback from the receiver's( as to how the message is understood and attempt to correct any misunderstanding or confusion as soon as possible. .eceivers can use &larification and .eflection as effective ways to ensure that the message sent has been understood correctly. Communication Channels &ommunication &hannels is the term given to the way in which we communicate. There are multiple communication channels available to us today, for example face to face conversations, telephone calls, text messages, email, the $nternet 'including social media

such as Facebook and Twitter(, radio and T/, written letters, brochures and reports to name just a few.

&hoosing an appropriate communication channel is vital for effective communication as each communication channel has different strengths and weaknesses. For example, broadcasting news of an upcoming event via a written letter might convey the message clearly to one or two individuals but will not be a time or cost effective way to broadcast the message to a large number of people. 0n the other hand, conveying complex, technical information is better done via a printed document than via a spoken message since the receiver is able to assimilate the information at their own pace and revisit items that they do not fully understand. 1ritten communication is also useful as a way of recording what has been said, for example taking minutes in a meeting. Enco(ing Messages All messages must be encoded into a form that can be conveyed by the communication channel chosen for the message. 1e all do this every day when transferring abstract thoughts into spoken words or a written form. 2owever, other communication channels re3uire different forms of encoding, e.g. text written for a report will not work well if broadcast via a radio programme, and the short, abbreviated text used in text messages would be inappropriate if sent via a letter. &omplex data may be best communicated using a graph or chart or other visualisation. -ffective communicators encode their messages with their intended audience in mind as well as the communication channel. This involves an appropriate use of language, conveying the information simply and clearly, anticipating and eliminating likely causes of confusion and

misunderstanding, and knowing the receivers4 experience in decoding other similar communications. communication. *uccessful encoding of messages is a vital skill in effective

)eco(ing Messages 0nce received, the receivers need to decode the message, and successful decoding is also a vital skill. $ndividuals will decode and understand messages in different ways based upon any barriers to communication which might be present, their experience and understanding of the context of the message, their psychological state, and the time and place of receipt as well as many other potential factors. +nderstanding how the message will be decoded, and anticipating as many of the potential sources of misunderstanding as possible, is the art of a successful communicator. *ee(#ac! .eceivers of messages are likely to provide feedback on how they have understood the messages through both verbal and non verbal reactions. -ffective communicators should pay close attention to this feedback as it the only way to assess whether the message has been understood as intended, and it allows any confusion to be corrected. !ear in mind that the extent and form of feedback will vary according to the communication channel used: for example feedback during a face to face or telephone conversation will be immediate and direct, whilst feedback to messages conveyed via T/ or radio will be indirect and may be delayed, or even conveyed through other media such as the $nternet.

DEVELOPING SKILLS
+nterpersonal Communication S!ills

COMMUNICATION

$nterpersonal communication is the process by which people exchange information, feelings, and meaning through verbal andnon verbal messages: it is face to face communication. $nterpersonal communication is not just about what is actually said the language used but how it is said and the non verbal messages sent through tone of voice, facial expressions, gestures and body language. 1hen two or more people are in the same place and are aware of each other)s presence, then communication is taking place, no matter how subtle or unintentional. 1ithout speech, an observer may be using cues of posture, facial expression, and dress to form an impression of the other)s role, emotional state, personality and5or intentions. Although no communication may be intended, people receive messages through such forms of non verbal behaviour. Elements of +nterpersonal Communication ,uch research has been done to try to break down interpersonal communication into a number of elements in order that it can be more easily understood. &ommonly these elements include: The Communicators

For any communication to occur there must be at least two people involved. $t is easy to think about communication involving a sender and a receiver of a message. 2owever, the problem with this way of seeing a relationship is that it presents communication as a one way process where one person sends the message and the other receives it.

$n fact communications are almost always complex, two way processes, with people sending and receiving messages to and from each other. $n other words, communication is an interactive process. The Message ,essage not only means the speech used or information conveyed, but also the non verbal messages exchanged such asfacial expressions, tone of voice, gestures and body language. 6on verbal behaviour can convey additional information about the message spoken. $n particular, it can reveal more about emotional attitudes which may underlie the content of speech. Noise 6oise has a special meaning in communication theory. $t refers to anything that distorts the message, so that what is received is different from what is intended by the speaker. 1hilst physical )noise) 'for example, background sounds or a low flying jet plane( can interfere with communication, other factors are considered to be 7noise4. The use of complicated jargon,inappropriate body language, inattention, disinterest, and cultural differences can be considered )noise) in the context of interpersonal communication. $n other words, any distortions or inconsistencies that occur during an attempt to communicate can be seen as noise.

*ee(#ac! Feedback consists of messages the receiver returns, which allows the sender to know how accurately the message has been received, as well as the receiver)s reaction. The receiver may also respond to the unintentional message as well as the intentional message. Types of feedback range from direct verbal statements, for example 8*ay that again, $ don)t understand8, to subtle facial expressions or changes in posture that might indicate to the sender that the receiver feels uncomfortable with the message. Feedback allows the sender to regulate, adapt or repeat the message in order to improve communication. Conte,t All communication is influenced by the context in which it takes place. 2owever, apart from looking at the situational context of where the interaction takes place, for example in a room, office, or perhaps outdoors, the social context also needs to be considered, for example the roles, responsibilities and relative status of the participants. The emotional climate and participants) expectations of the interaction will also affect the communication. Channel The channel refers to the physical means by which the message is transferred from one person to another. $n face to face context the channels which are used are speech and vision, however during a telephone conversation the channel is limited to speech alone.

1hen we have the opportunity to observe some interpersonal communication, we should make a mental note of the behaviours used, both verbal and non verbal. O#ser-e an( thin! a#out the follo.ing factors$ 9 9 9 9 9 1ho are the communicators: 1hat messages were exchanged: 1hat 'if any( noise distorts the message: 2ow is feedback given: 1hat is the context of the communication:

!y observing others we will start to think about how we communicate and be more aware of the messages we send. /SES O* +NTERPERSONA0 COMM/N+CAT+ON $nterpersonal communication can be used to: 9 9 9 9 %ive and collect information. $nfluence the attitudes and behaviour of others. Form contacts and maintain relationships. ,ake sense of the world and our experiences in it.

9 9 9 9 9

-xpress personal needs and understand the needs of others. %ive and receive emotional support. ,ake decisions and solve problems. Anticipate and predict behaviour. .egulate power.

-ffective verbal or spoken communication is dependant on a number of factors and cannot be fully isolated from other important interpersonal skills such as non verbal communication, listening skills and clarification. &larity of speech, remaining calm and focused, being polite and eti3uette will all aid the process of verbal communication. This article is designed to help us think about how we and others communicate verbally, the processes involved and the steps we can take to ensure that verbal or spoken messages are received as intended. Opening Communication $n many encounters, the first few minutes are extremely important as first impressions have a significant impact on the success of further communication. -veryone has expectations and norms as to how initial meetings should proceed and people tend to behave according to these expectations. $f interpersonal expectations are mismatched, communication will not be effective or run smoothly, and negotiation will be needed if relations are to continue.

At a first meeting, formalities and appropriate greetings are usually expected: such formalities could include a handshake, an introduction to yourself, eye contact and discussion around a neutral subject such as the weather or your journey may be useful. A friendly disposition and smiling face are much more likely to encourage communication than a blank face, inattention or disinterested reception. Reinforcement The use of encouraging words alongside non verbal gestures such as head nods, a warm facial expression and maintaining eye contact, are more likely to reinforce openness in others. The use of encouragement and positive reinforcement can: 9 9 9 9 9 9 -ncourage others to participate in discussion 'particularly in group work( *ignify interest in what other people have to say ;ave the way for development and5or maintenance of a relationship Allay fears and give reassurance *how warmth and openness. .educe shyness or nervousness in ourselves and others.

Effecti-e 0istening Active listening is a very important listening skill and yet, as communicators, people tend to spend far more energy considering what they are going to say rather than listening to what the other person is trying to say. Although active listening is a skill in itself, it is also vital for verbal communication. The following points are essential for effective and active listening:

Arrange a comfortable environment conducive to the purpose of the communication,

for example a warm and light room with minimal background noise. 9 9 9 9 9 9 !e prepared to listen. <eep an open mind and concentrate on the main direction of the speaker)s message. Avoid distractions if at all possible. =elay judgment until you have heard everything. !e objective. =o not be trying to think of your next 3uestion while the other person is giving

information. 9 9 =o not dwell on one or two points at the expense of others. The speaker should not be stereotyped. Try not to let prejudices associated with, for

example, gender, ethnicity, social class, appearance or dress interfere with what is being said. $nterpersonal communication not only involves the explicit meaning of words, that is the information or message conveyed, but also refers to implicit messages, whether intentional or not, which may be expressed through non verbal behaviours. 6on verbal communications include facial expressions, the tone and pitch of the voice, gestures displayed through body language 'kinesics( and the physical distance between communicators 'proxemics(. These non verbal signals can give clues and additional information and meaning over and above spoken 'verbal( communication. 6on verbal messages allow individuals to:

.einforce or modify what is said in words. For example, people may nod their heads

vigorously when saying 8>es8 to emphasise that they agree with the other person, but a shrug of the shoulders and a sad expression when saying 8$)m fine thanks,? may imply that things are not really fine at all@

9 9 9 9

&onvey information about their emotional state. =efine or reinforce the relationship between people. ;rovide feedback to the other person. .egulate the flow of communication, for example by signalling to others that they

have finished speaking or wish to say something. ,any popular books on non verbal communication present the topic as if it were a language that can be learned, the implication being that if the meaning of every nod, eye movement, and gesture were known, the real feelings and intentions of a person would be understood. +nfortunately interpreting non verbal communication is not that simple. As covered in our $nterpersonal &ommunication page, the way communication is influenced by the context in which it occurs. For example, a nod of the head between colleagues in a committee meeting may mean something very different to when the same action is used to acknowledge someone across a crowded room. $nterpersonal communication is further complicated in that it is usually not possible to interpret a gesture or expression accurately on its own. 6on verbal communication consists of a complete package of expressions, hand and eye movements, postures, and gestures which should be interpreted along with speech 'verbal communication(.

The types of interpersonal communication that are not expressed verbally are called non verbal communications. These include: 9 9 9 9 9 9 9 !ody ,ovements '<inesics( ;osture -ye &ontact ;aralanguage &loseness or ;ersonal *pace ';roxemics( Facial -xpressions ;hysiological &hanges

T1PES O* NON%"ER2A0 COMM/N+CAT+ON 1hen we communicate, non verbal cues can have as great as an impact on the listener as the spoken word. There are many different aspects of non verbal communication including: 2o(y Mo-ements 3Kinesics4 !ody movements include gestures, posture, head and hand movements or whole body movements. !ody movements can be used to reinforce or emphasise what a person is saying and also offer information about the emotions and attitudes of a person. 2owever, it is also possible for body movements to conflict with what is said. A skilled observer may be able to detect such discrepancies in behaviour and use them as a clue to what someone is really feeling. .esearch work has identified the different categories of body movement that are detailed below with each category describing the purpose they commonly serve:

Em#lems$ %estures that serve the same function as a word are called emblems. For example, the signals that mean )0<), )&ome here@), or the hand movement used when hitch hiking. 2owever, be aware that whilst some emblems are internationally recognised, others may need to be interpreted in their cultural context.

+llustrators$ %estures which accompany words to illustrate a verbal message are known as illustrators. For example, the common circular hand movement which accompanies the phrase )over and over again), or nodding the head in a particular direction when saying )over there). Affect )isplays$ These are facial expressions or gestures which show the emotions we feel. These are often unintentional and can conflict with what is being said. *uch expressions give strong clues as to the true emotional state of a person. Regulators$ %estures used to give feedback when conversing are called regulators, for example head nods, short sounds such as )uh huh), )mm mm), and expressions of interest or boredom. .egulators allow the other person to adapt his or her speech to reflect the level of interest or agreement. 1ithout receiving feedback, many people find it difficult to maintain a conversation. A(aptors$ 6on verbal behaviours which either satisfy some physical need such as scratching or adjusting uncomfortable glasses, or represent a psychological need such as biting fingernails when nervous. Although normally subconscious, adaptors are more likely to be restrained in public places than in the private world of individuals where they are less likely to be noticed. Adaptive behaviours often accompany feelings of anxiety or hostility.

Posture ;osture can reflect people)s emotions, attitudes and intentions. .esearch has identified a wide range of postural signals and their meanings, such as:

Open an( Close( Posture$ Two forms of posture have been identified, 7open4 and 7closed4, which may reflect an individual)s degree of confidence, status or receptivity to another person. *omeone seated in a closed position might have his5her arms folded, legs crossed or be positioned at a slight angle from the person with whom they are interacting. $n an open posture you might expect to see someone directly facing you with hands apart on the arms of the chair. An open posture can be used to communicate openness or interest in someone and a readiness to listen, whereas the closed posture might imply discomfort or disinterest. Mirroring$ 6otice the way a loving couple relate to each other. >ou might like to observe a close relationship in person or on television. >ou will see that the partners) postures will match, as if one partner is a mirror reflection of the other. For example, if one partner drapes an arm over the back of a chair this might be replicated in the other person)s position. $f one partner frowns, it could be reflected in the other partner)s facial expression. This )mirroring) indicates interest and approval between people and serves to reassure others of interest in them and what they are saying. Eye Contact -ye contact is an important aspect of non verbal behaviour. $n interpersonal interaction, it serves three main purposes:

To give and receive feedback: "ooking at someone lets them know that the receiver is

concentrating on the content of their speech. 6ot maintaining eye contact can indicate disinterest. &ommunication may not be a smooth process if a listener averts their eyes too fre3uently. 9 To let a partner know when it is their )turn) to speak: This is related to the above point.

-ye contact is more likely to be continuous when someone is listening, rather than speaking. 1hen a person has finished what they have to say, they will look directly at the other person and this gives a signal that the arena is open. $f someone does not want to be interrupted, eye contact may be avoided. 9 To communicate something about a relationship between people: 1hen you dislike

someone, you tend to avoid eye contact and pupil si#e is often reduced. 0n the other hand, the maintenance of positive eye contact signals interest or attraction in a partner. Paralanguage ;aralanguage relates to all aspects of the voice which are not strictly part of the verbal message, including the tone and pitch of the voice, the speed and volume at which a message is delivered, and pauses and hesitations between words. These signals can serve to indicate feelings about what is being said. -mphasising particular words can imply whether or not feedback is re3uired. Closeness an( Personal Space -very culture has different levels of physical closeness appropriate to different types of relationship, and individuals learn these distances from the society in which they grew up. $n today)s multicultural society, it is important to consider the range of non verbal codes as

expressed in different ethnic groups. 1hen someone violates an )appropriate) distance, people may feel uncomfortable or defensive. Their actions may well be open to misinterpretation.

$n 1estern society, four distances have been defined according to the relationship between the people involved, the study of personal space is termed proxemics. This term was used by the anthropologist -dward Twitchell 2all: $ntimate =istance 'touching to ABcm( ;ersonal =istance 'ABcm to C.Dm( *ocial =istance 'C.Dm to E.Fm( ;ublic =istance 'E.Gm to A.Bm( These four distances are associated with the four main types of relationship intimate,

personal, social and public. -ach of the distances are divided into two, giving a close phase and a far phase, thus making eight divisions in all. $t is worth noting that these distances are considered the norm in 1estern *ociety: +ntimate )istance$ .anges from close contact 'touching( to the )far) phase of CB ABcm. $n !ritish society, it tends to be seen as an inappropriate distance for public behaviour and, as mentioned above, entering the intimate space of another person with whom you do not have a close relationship can be extremely disturbing. Personal )istance$ The )far) phase of personal distance is considered to be the most appropriate for people holding a conversation. At this distance it is easy to see the other

person)s expressions and eye movements, as well as their overall body language. 2andshaking can occur within the bounds of personal distance.

Social )istance$ This is the normal distance for impersonal business, for example working together in the same room or during social gatherings. *eating is also importantH communication is far more likely to be considered as a formal relationship if the interaction is carried out across a desk. $n addition, if the seating arrangements are such that one person appears to look down on another, an effect of domination may be created. At a social distance, speech needs to be louder and eye contact remains essential to communication, otherwise feedback will be reduced and the interaction may end. Pu#lic )istance$ Teachers and public speakers address groups at a public distance. -xaggerated non verbal communication is necessary if effective communication is to occur. *ince subtle facial expressions are lost at this distance so clear hand gestures are often used as a substitute. "arger head movements are also typical of an experienced public speaker who is aware of changes in the way body language is perceived at longer distances. +nderstanding these distances allows individuals to approach others in non threatening and appropriate ways. $ndividuals can begin to understand how other people feel about them, how they view the relationship and, if appropriate, adjust their behaviour accordingly. As we can see, non verbal communication is an extremely complex yet integral part of overall communication skills. ;eople are often totally unaware of the non verbal behaviour they use. A basic awareness of these aspects of communication strategies, over and above what is actually said can help to improve interaction with others. <nowledge of these signs

can be used to encourage individuals to talk about their concerns and can lead to a greater shared understanding

"istening is the ability to accurately receive messages in the communication process. "istening is key to all effective communication, without the ability to listen effectively messages are easily misunderstood I communication breaks down and the sender of the message can easily become frustrated or irritated. "istening is so important that many top employers give regular listening skills training for their employees. This is not surprising when you consider that good listening skills can lead to: better customer satisfaction, greater productivity with fewer mistakes, increased sharing of information that in turn can lead to more creative and innovative work. %ood listening skills also have benefits in our personal lives, including: a greater number of friends and social networks, improved self esteem and confidence, higher grades in academic work and increased health and wellbeing. *tudies have shown that, whereas speaking raises blood pressure, listening brings it down. "istening is not the same as hearing. 2earing refers to the sounds that you hear, whereas listening re3uires more than that: it re3uires focus. "istening means paying attention not only to the story, but how it is told, the use of language and voice, and how the other person uses his or her body. $n other words, it means being aware of both verbal and non verbal messages. >our ability to listen effectively depends on the degree to which you perceive and understand these messages.

JThe most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Kust listen. ;erhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention.? .achel 6aomi .emen.

1e spend a lot of our time listening Adults spend an average of GLM of their time engaged in some sort of communication, of this an average of ABM is spent listening compared to ELM speaking, CFM reading and NM writing. 'Adler, .. et al. DLLC(.

BARRIERS TO EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

There are many reasons why communications may fail. $n many communications, the

message may not be received exactly the way the sender intended and hence it is important that the communicator seeks feedback to check that their message is clearly understood. There exist many barriers to communication and these may occur at any stage in the communication process. !arriers may lead to your message becoming distorted and you therefore risk wasting both time and money by causing confusion and misunderstanding. -ffective communication involves overcoming these barriers and conveying a clear and concise message. *ome common barriers to effective communication include: 9 9 9 9 9 The use of jargon, over complicated or unfamiliar terms. -motional barriers and taboos. "ack of attention, interest, distractions, or irrelevance to the receiver. =ifferences in perception and viewpoint. ;hysical disabilities such as hearing problems or speech difficulties.

9 9 9

;hysical barriers to non verbal communication. "anguage differences and the difficulty in understanding unfamiliar accents. -xpectations and prejudices which may lead to false assumptions or stereotyping.

;eople often hear what they expect to hear rather than what is actually said and jump to incorrect conclusions. 9 &ultural differences. The norms of social interaction vary greatly in different

cultures, as do the way in which emotions are expressed. For example, the concept of personal space varies between cultures and between different social settings. A skilled communicator must be aware of these barriers and try to reduce their impact by continually checking understanding and by offering appropriate feedback. 0anguage 2arriers &learly, language and linguistic ability may act as a barrier to communication. 2owever, even when communicating in the same language, the terminology used in a message may act as a barrier if it is not fully understood by the receiver's(. For example, a message that includes a lot of specialist jargon and abbreviations will not be understood by a receiver who is not familiar with the terminology used. .egional collo3uialisms and expressions may be misinterpreted or even considered offensive. Psychological 2arriers The psychological state of the receiver will influence how the message is received. For example, if someone has personal worries and is stressed, they may be preoccupied by personal concerns and not as receptive to the message as if they were not stressed. *tress is

an important factor in $nterpersonal relationships. Anger is another example of a psychological barrier to communicationH Physiological 2arriers ;hysiological barriers may result from the receiver4s physical state: for example, a receiver with reduced hearing may not grasp to entirety of a spoken conversation especially if there is significant background noise. Physical 2arriers An example of a physical barrier to communication is geographic distance between the sender and receiver's(. &ommunication is generally easier over shorter distances as more communication channels are available and less technology is re3uired. Although modern technology often serves to reduce the impact of physical barriers, the advantages and disadvantages of each communication channel should be understood so that an appropriate channel can be used to overcome the physical barriers. Systematic 2arriers *ystematic barriers to communication may exist in structures and organisations where there are inefficient or inappropriate information systems and communication channels, or where there is a lack of understanding of the roles and responsibilities for communication. $n such organisations, individuals may be unclear of their role in the communication process and therefore not know what is expected of them. Attitu(inal 2arriers Attitudinal barriers are behaviours or perceptions that prevent people from communicating effectively. Attitudinal barriers to communication may result from personality conflicts, poor

management, and resistance to change or a lack of motivation.

-ffective receivers of

messages should attempt to overcome their own attitudinal barriers to facilitate effective communication.

.apport is a state of harmonious understanding with another individual or group that enables greater and easier communication. $n other words rapport is getting on well with another person, or group of people, by having things in commonH this makes the communication process easier and usually more effective. *ometimes rapport happens naturally, you 7hit it off4 or 7get on well4 with somebody else without having to try, this is often how friendships are built. 2owever, rapport can also be built and developed by finding common ground, developing a bond and being empathic. .apport is important in both our professional and personal livesH employers are more likely to employ somebody who they believe will get on well with their current staff. ;ersonal relationships are easier to make and develop when there is a closer connection and understanding between the parties involved I i.e. there is greater rapport. The first task in successful interpersonal relationships is to attempt to build rapport. !uilding rapport is all about matching ourselves with another person. For many, starting a

conversation with a stranger is a stressful eventH we can be lost for words, awkward with our body language and mannerisms. &reating rapport at the beginning of a conversation with somebody new will often make the outcome of the conversation more positive. 2owever stressful and5or nervous you may feel the first thing you need to do is to try to relax and

remain calm, by decreasing the tension in the situation communication becomes easier and rapport grows.

Ho. to 2rea! the +ce 1hen meeting somebody for the first time some simple tips will help us reduce the tension in the situation enabling both parties to feel more relaxed and thus communicate more effectively: 9 +se of non threatening and 7safe topics4 for initial small talk. Talking about

established shared experiences, the weather, how you travelled to where you are. Avoiding talking too much about ourself and avoid asking direct 3uestions about the other person. 9 "istening to what the other person is saying and looking for shared experiences or

circumstances this will give us more to talk about in the initial stages of communication. 9 Trying to inject an element of humour. "aughing together creates harmony, making a

joke about ourself or the situation5circumstances we are in but avoid making jokes about them. 9 !eing conscious of our body language and other non verbal signals we are sending.

Trying to maintain eye contact for approximately FLM of the time, relaxing and leaning slightly towards them to indicate listening, mirror their body language if appropriate.

9 view.

*howing some empathy, demonstrating that we can see the other person4s point of .emembering rapport is all about finding similarities and 7being on the same

wavelength4 as somebody else so being empathic will help to achieve this. ,ake sure the other person feels included but not interrogated during initial conversations, as we may feel tense and uneasy meeting and talking to somebody new, so may they. ;utting the other person at ease, this will enable us to relax and conversation to take on a natural course. Although initial conversations can help us to relax, most rapport building happens without words and through non verbal communication channels. 1e create and maintain rapport subconsciously through matching non verbal signals, including body positioning, body movements, eye contact, facial expressions and tone of voice with the other person. 1atch two friends talking when we get the opportunity and see how they sub consciously mimic each other4s non verbal communication. 1e create rapport instinctively, it is our natural defence from conflict, which most of us will try hard to avoid most of the time. $t is important that appropriate body language is usedH we read and instantly believe what body language tells us, whereas we may take more persuading with vocal communication. $f there is a mismatch between what we are saying verbally and what our body language is saying then the person we are communicating with will believe the body language. !uilding rapport, therefore, begins with displaying appropriate body language relaxed and open. As well as paying attention to and matching body language with the person we are communicating with, it helps if we can also match their words. .eflecting back and being welcoming,

clarifying what has been said are useful tactics for repeating what has been communicated by the other person. 6ot only will it confirm that you are listening but also give you opportunity

to use the words and phases of the other person, further emphasising similarity and common ground. The way we use our voice is also important in developing rapport. 1hen we are nervous or tense we tend to talk more 3uickly, this in turn can make you sound more tense and stressed. 1e can vary our voices, pitch, volume and pace in ways to make what we are saying more interesting but also to come across as more relaxed, open and friendly. Trying lowering your tone, talk more slowly and softly, this will help us develop rapport more easily. Helpful Rapport 2uil(ing 2eha-iour 9 $f you are sitting then lean forward, towards the person you are talking to, with hands open and arms and legs uncrossed. This is open body language and will help you and the person you are talking to feel more relaxed. 9 "ook at the other person for approximately FLM of the time. %ive plenty of eye contact but be careful not to make them feel uncomfortable. 9 1hen listening, nod and make encouraging sounds and gestures. 9 *mile@ 9 +se the other person4s name early in the conversation. 9 Ask the other person open 3uestions. 0pen 3uestions re3uire more than a yes or no answer. 9 +se feedback to summarise, reflect and clarify back to the other person what you think they have said. This gives opportunity for any misunderstandings to be rectified 3uickly. 9 Talk about things that refer back to what the other person has said. Find links between common experiences.

9 Try to show empathy. =emonstrate that you can understand how the other person feels and can see things from their point of view. 9 1hen in agreement with the other person, openly say so and say why. 9 !uild on the other person4s ideas. 9 !e non judgemental towards the other person. "et go of stereotypes and any preconceived ideas you may have about the person. 9 $f you have to disagree with the other person, give the reason first then say you disagree. 9 Admit when you don4t know the answer or have made a mistake. !eing honest is always the best tactic, acknowledging mistakes will help to build trust. 9 !e genuine, with visual and verbal behaviours working together to maximi#e the impact of your communication. 9 0ffer a compliment, avoid criticism.

Our Communication S!ills can ma!e a (ifference #et.een #eing Hire( an( *ire(

THANK 1O/555