Wonder Words

English is a marvelous and rich language. Yet native speakers seldom pause to consider its weird vocabulary. Coming from different countries and cultures and meandering the halls of history many English words now seem to have paradoxical definitions. These are wonder words because they make you wonder When you eat more vegetables isn!t it fruitless" #id you ever wonder why funeral starts with the word fun" Would church music be considered organic" $sn!t dogma a bitch" What are you vacating when you go on vacation" %hould someone with guests act hostile" &r take them hostage" Wouldn!t it be more accurate to call a fireman a waterman" Can you en'oy a party fully" $n the navy is a portly person left(handed" $s a precaution something you get before a caution" #o undertakers actually undertake when it comes to fees for service" Could we call an abstract painting an artificial artifice" )t sundown wouldn!t you expect nightrise instead of nightfall" Would you expect a high(rise of flats to be very tall" $sn!t kidnapping normal in kindergartens" )ren!t even small Catholic churches massive" )re overjoyed people too happy" $sn!t the center of register the gist of the word" Can lay people be upstanding citi*ens" Why do they call marriage matrimony instead of patrimony" +ike the wheel wasn!t the la*y %usan a revolutionary idea" ,ust before an artist!s model takes a break is she predisposed" Would the ugly truth be called the lowdown lowdown" -ow come lipstick doesn!t do what it says" $f money doesn!t grow on trees then why do banks have branches" $f a deaf person has to go to court is it still called a hearing" $f you run errands aren!t you a go-getter" Why don!t we say farrer instead of farther or nearther instead of nearer" $sn!t a good steak rarely well done" #idn!t rearing children once have something to do with spanking their butts" Wouldn!t it be more correct to call a butterfly a flowerfly" $f you pull the wings off a fly does it become a walk" $f somebody is armed to the teeth does he have a neck" $f you cease to be then come alive are you deceased" -ow come you are still sitting after you sat. $sn!t it ama*ing that anyone can stand sitting" $nstead of a personality does a dog have a dogality" -ow come someone can be canny and uncanny at the same time"

What!s the point of flattery" $f a vegetarian eats vegetables what does a humanitarian eat" Exactly what is so fast about quicksand" )ren!t half-baked ideas rare" -ow do you get off a non-stop flight" When you cash a check do you check the cash" What is so proper about property" $sn!t anything underwater also over water" )re outstanding pay checks good or bad" Why do they call dwellings stuck together apartments" Can you orient yourself out west" Why are there interstates in -awaii" Why do caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing" $f you are 'ust kidding isn!t that childish" )t the drive(in theatres was there a lot of autoeroticism" Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways" $sn!t it odd that sweetmeat is basically bread while sweetbread is meat" Why do we hear music from speakers and dial talk shows on tuners" Why is brassiere singular and panties plural" -ow come people recite at a play and play at a recital" Why do we iron our clothes and paper our walls" Why are goods sent by ship called cargo and those sent by truck shipment" Why does worthless mean the opposite of priceless" Why are the bigheaded usually also small-minded" $n court how come you can!t swear except under oath" #oesn!t is seem the opposite of ability should be nobility" $f you get a scratch on your car can you make something from it" $s it cheating to put silverware and glasses in a dishwasher" $sn!t it odd that to tell time you look at the hands on the face on the wrist" $f you are assassinated instead of 'ust murdered are you important" %houldn!t guests leave a ban.uest fed up" $n a stadium why do they call a place where you sit the stands" Then there all those military wonder words. Why is a bunch of foot soldiers called an army instead of a leggy" Was /eorge Washington a revolting general" Why doesn!t the military call missiles hittiles instead" $s a fortress a fort without any guns sticking out" $s a casualty someone dressed in sweat shirt and 'eans" #oes an army major get demoted to a minor" %houldn!t the army infantry be called the army adultery" -ow come an army private doesn!t get any privacy" %pecifically what is an army general"