ISSN: 0976-3759

Volume X

Issue 07

ISSN: 0976-3759

Journal of School Social Work Price Rs 20.00

A National School Social Work monthly dedicated to networking of parents and teachers.

Volume X Issue 7

December 2013
C ont e nt s

Page

Editorial Dr Laxmi 02 Parenting Styles Retold Deepti Redhu and Asmita 03 Social Work Perspective of Parenting Style Sasikala S and Dr Florance Shalini J 07 Social Work Intervention forAcademic Excellence John Packiaraj M 11 Attitude of Student-Teachers towards Teaching Profession Pachiyappan P and Dr Ushalaya Raj D 15 Parental Choice in Selecting Schools for Their Wards Dr Ramakrishnan N 21 Parenting Styles: Research Openings Dr Suman K Murthy 27

Focus: Parenting Challenges

Hony Special Editor: Dr Laxmi, MSW, Ph.D
Assistant Professor, DOS in Social Work, Pooja Bhagavath Memorial Mahajana P.G. Centre, Mysore, Karnataka, India Journal of School Social Work,

Mobile: 98406 02325

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

8 (New 14), Sridevi Colony, Seventh Avenue, Ashok Nagar, Chennai 600083

jssw.india@ gmail.com
01

Note: Views expressed by the contributors are not necessarily the official view of the Journal.

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

ISSN: 0976-3759

Volume X

Issue 07

ISSN: 0976-3759

Parenting Styles Retold

Deepti Redhu* Asmita**
*Deepti Redhu, Assistant Professor, Mata Harki Devi College of Education for Women, Odhan, Sirsa, Haryana, India -125 077. deepti.nain@gmail.com **Asmita, Assistant Professor, SLIET (Deemed University), Longowal, Sangrur, Punjab, India -148 106. it.asmita@gmail.com

30

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

Introduction: development of a childs autonomy Parenting is the process of within reasonable limits. There is a promoting and supporting the give-and-take atmosphere involved in physical, emotional, social, and parent-child communication and both intellectual development of a child control and support are balanced. from infancy to adulthood. Parenting Authoritarian parenting: is important in order to help children These parents are very rigid, strict. grow into confident, well-adjusted and and place high demands on the child, perfect individuals. Parenting refers to but are not responsive to the child. In the aspects of raising a child besides this style of parenting, children are the biological relationship. State and expected to follow the strict rules society can take a role as well as the established by the parents. Failure to biological parents and immediate follow such rules usually results in family. Parenting does not follow any punishment. Punishment is most single path and does not treat all often used to promote future children as chips of the same block. obedience. This type of parenting is Each child is different from another seen more often in working class child and so, every child is to be families than in middle and upper-class treated differently. It means there are families. Children raised through many parenting styles. authoritarian style are less cheerful, Authoritative parenting: more moody and also demonstrate This style combines a medium passive hostility and anti-social traits. level demands on the child and a Permissive parenting: medium level responsiveness from the Permissive parents, sometimes parents who believe in positive referred to as indulgent parents, have reinforcement and infrequent use of very few demands to make of their punishment. They are more aware of children. This style of parenting is a childs feelings, abilities, aptitude and more popular in middle-class families capabilities and support the than in working-class families. In these Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013 03

ISSN: 0976-3759

Volume X family settings, a childs freedom and These children tend to lack self-control, autonomy are overvalued and parents have low self-esteem and are less tend to believe and depend mostly competent than their peers. on reasoning and explanation. There Now the question arises that which are minimum expectations from child is the perfect style of parenting, there so punishment or explicit rules in this is no single style rather it depends on style of parenting are less. Children the nature, attitude, aptitude etc. of of permissive parents are generally the child and economic, social, happy but sometimes show low levels geographical environment of the of self-control and self-reliance family but the research shows that because they lack structure at home. authoritative parenting style is more Permissive parents are generally beneficial than the too-hard nurturing and communicative with authoritarian style or the too-soft their children, often taking on the permissive style. status of a friend more than that of a Pointers to parenting: parent. Parenting is empowering children Uninvolved parenting: to do something that you did not even An uninvolved or neglectful dare to think in your life. Given below parenting style is when parents are are some tips to effective parenting: often emotionally absent and Give unfettered love: Love does sometimes even physically absent. not mean providing all material An uninvolved parenting style is comforts. Love is warmth and characterized by few demands, low security. Give unconditional love. responsiveness and little Its time to learn, not teach: communication. There is often a large When a child comes, unknowingly gap between parents and children with we laugh, play, sing, crawl under this parenting style. Children with little the sofa, and do all those things or no communication with their own that we normally dont do. So it is parents tended to be the victims of time to learn about life along with another childs deviant behaviour and teaching them. may be involved in some deviance Use action, not words: Due to themselves. Children of uninvolved parents complaints and endless parents suffer in social competence, do this and do that children academic performance, psychosocial become parent deaf! An action development and problem behaviour. speaks louder than words. 04 Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

Issue 07 Provide the best atmosphere to children. They sense a supportive and loving atmosphere as well as anxiety-ridden state of affairs. Form a friendly relationship: Parents should avoid being a boss be friendly at home. Make yourself-truly attractive: A child is attracted and influenced by many things. If parents are joyous, intelligent, and wonderful, he would not seek company anywhere else. Use genuine encounter moments (GEMS): Childs selfesteem is greatly influenced by the quality of time parents spend with him and not the amount of time. Parents often pretend to listen or ignore childs attempts to communicate with them. If parents dont give to child GEMS throughout the day, he will often start to misbehave. Use action, not words: Due to parents daily orders, complaints and endless do this and do that children become parent deaf! An action speaks louder than words. Let them take decision to feel powerful: Ways to help them feel powerful are to ask their advice, to give them choices, to let them to help adults in different tasks. Use natural consequences: If parents interfere when they dont

need to, they rob from the children of the chance to learn from the consequences of their actions. Use logical consequences: Often the consequences are too far in the future to practically use a natural consequence. When that is the case, logical consequences are effective. A consequence for the child must be logically related to the behaviour in order for it to work. Withdraw from conflict: If the child tests through a temper tantrum or being angry or speaking disrespectfully, it is best to leave the room or tell the child you will be in the next room if he wants to Try again. Do not leave in anger or defeat, be patient during that time. Be watchful: Be Consistent in keeping your eyes on the activities of the child and on his/ her company. Nurture your childs self-esteem: Children start developing their sense of self as babies when they see themselves through parents eyes. Parents tone of voice, body language and every expression is absorbed by child. Consequently, praising the child for his accomplishment, however small; letting him to do things for himself will make him feel capable and

ISSN: 0976-3759

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

05

ISSN: 0976-3759

independent. By contrast, belittling your child or comparing him unfavourably with another will make him feel worthless. Catch your child being good: The more effective approach is to catch the child doing something right, and praise to the skies. You completed your homework without being asked-thats marvellous! orYouwerepolishingyourshoes very skilfully! These statements will do more to encourage good behaviour over the long run than repeated scolding and being harsh. Conclusion: There is no universally perfect and best style of parenting, if you are

Volume X genuinely interested in giving your children a perfect and good upbringing accept that different children need different levels of attention, expression of love, and toughness. Suppose gardener is working in a coconut garden and you ask him, How much water per plant? he answers At least 50 litres per plant. When you go home, if you give 50 litres to your rose plant, it will die. So, you must be careful that what kind of plant you have at your home and what it needs. To the world you are one person, But to your child you are the World! Make their world beautiful and fill it with love!

Issue 07

ISSN: 0976-3759

References: Dr Vatsyayan (1982): Child Psychology and Child Guidance. Meerut: Kedarnath Co. Mishra, R.C. (2005): Early Childhood Care and Education. New Delhi: A P H Publishing Corporation. Sharma, R.N. (1999): Raising Children with Difficulties , Meerut: Rastogi Publication. Garry Chapman, Ross Campbell (1995): The five Love languages of Children, Country? Northfield publishing, ISBN: 1881273652.. Aldort, Naomi (2006): Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves; Country? Books Publisher Networks, ISBN- 1887542329. Bruehl, Mariah: Playful Learning, Country? Publisher? ISBN-9781590308196. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parenting. http://www.fcs.okstate.edu/parenting/issues/communicating.htm. http://www.eklavya.org/parenting. Elsen, Jane (1986): Positive Discipline, Country? Ballantine Books, ISBN0345487672.

Focus for Jan 2014: Balanced Diet. HSE: Dr Venkateswarlu V, Dept. of Sociology and Social Work, Acharya Nagarjuna University, AP 06 Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

ISSN: 0976-3759

Volume X Date: To Subscription Division, Journal of School Social Work, 8 (New 14), Sridevi Colony, 7th Avenue, Ashok Nagar, Chennai 600083 Past Subscription no:

Issue 07

ISSN: 0976-3759

From Principal/ Librarian,

PIN: Sir,

Sub: Renewal/ New Subscription reg. Please find enclosed a crossed DD drawn in favour of JOURNAL OF SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK for Rs 1200.00 (5 years subscription) Rs 2400 (10 years subscription) Rs 3600.00 (Patron subscription 15 years) payable at Chennai Service Branch. Details of DD: No: dated drawn on The Journal may please be sent to the following address:

PINCODE: Thanking you, Yours truly,

Signature and seal

A photocopy may also be used.

Journal of School Social Work has a current account (A/C no: 409201010035051) in Ashok Nagar, Chennai branch of Union Bank of India (IFSC Code: UBINO540927.) Subscription can be directly remitted from ANY BANK, anywhere in India.

26

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013

Journal of SCHOOL SOCIAL WORK December 2013