God is not done with you and me yet. Not yet.

I grew up in a Christian home, a Presbyterian Church, a successful family and lovely environment. But why was it that I was never really happy? I mean sure, whatever. I now !esus, I now "e died on the cross for my sins, I now I#m supposed to love everyone, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah. But there is so much more to that. $%& more to that. '()' '()' was absolutely the worst year of my life. I believe and now the reason was because I tried finding *oy in worldly things and I never really fi+ed my eyes on God. I was always insecure about my body, where I came from, and what people thought about me. I was pretty big and I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to go out and sing and play my instruments to others, even when it didn#t glorify God. ,ong story short, I wanted to be truly happy. In striving to be happy, I did the wrong things. -ainly by ic ing God out and ma ing "im second in everything I did. I would cry out to "im at times and yell and as "im why. .$hy can#t I be happy? $hy can#t &ou fulfill the things I want to do and become? $hy aren#t &ou doing anything? %ren#t &ou the %ll Powerful God?/ %s I#m writing this I#m crying because it gives me pain to now that I was demanding to receive happiness from God when I couldn#t even ma e time for "im. 0his gives me pain because I did this to my self. Both of my parents have well1paying *obs, I attend school, and I#m not sic , nor are any of my relatives. I#m not on the streets begging and I#m not dying. $hat did I have to complain for? I complained because I didn#t truly have !esus in my heart. "e was always second. 2tress pretty much too over resulting in weight gain, hair loss and mild depression. I told myself this is enough. 0his has to be enough. 3n the last day of '()', I cried. I wept to God because I was tired. I was tired of ma ing resolutions that I couldn#t eep. 0ired of ma ing goals that too me away from God. 0ired of everything really. I was in Nigeria at the time with family to celebrate the New &ear cross1over at home. I prayed that '()4 would be different. It had to be different. -y goal for '()4 was to start over. 2imple, right? Not really. I wanted to start over on everything. I prayed to God that night to forgive me for not spending time for "im, and for not ta ing "im seriously. I had to start over. I was determined. God truly answers prayers. '()4 '()4 was ama5ing. I don#t thin words could describe how awesome God has been to me. -y main goal was to manifest the Glory of God. 0hat, even though a person may not now me, they#d now that the %ll Powerful God %lmighty is alive and well. I started little by little, first by paying more attention in church. 0hen, since the world needs !esus, I started my own little preaching session at lunch time in school. 6veryday at lunch, I#d thin of a topic, get out my Bible, and tal to my classmates about it. 0he school I attended at the time was 768& diverse, so not everyone was Christian. It was against the school guidelines to discuss your religion at school, but I did so anyway, because people have to now. People have to now the !esus is coming bac soon. People need to get ready. It#s our *obs as Christians to go out and spread the $ord because !esus is coming bac . I then got in a lot of competitions. Churches were inviting me to sing and play

piano. God gave us all gifts. $hat better way to glorify God than to use the gifts "e gave you? It gave me great *oy to sing to the glory of God. It gives me great *oy when people as what the lyrics mean. It ma es me happy when I can teach them while the "oly 2pirit leads me. I graduated middle school in -ay '()4 with the second highest GP% and said my speech, than ing God in my heart. I too a month out of the summer to wor on my appearance. God doesn#t loo at you. "e loo s at your heart. God made you the way you are for a reason and "e#s done. No need to worry. "e focuses on your heart. It was hard for me because I was pretty big. I didn#t want to weigh more than my older siblings. I didn#t want to see that number on the scale. I didn#t want relatives comparing me to others. I didn#t li e people holding my bodily fat and ma ing me feel bad. I didn#t li e that. I had to change that. 9irstly I prayed to God to help me. I didn#t want to focus on my appearance. I wanted to focus on "im. In !une '()4, I e+ercised more than I ever did in my life. I was so serious in trying to loo .good/ that I harmed myself. I started starving myself because I was desperate. 2tarving made everything worse. $hen you starve, you#re telling your body that you#re probably not going to eat, so your body starts storing fat for survival. In reali5ing what I was doing, I tried again in !uly. I lost ': lbs in all and I felt accomplished. I started school the following month and I told myself that I had to wor harder because high school is different than middle school. I had to thin differently. 2o far so good, I guess, hahahaha. By ;ecember '<, my old piano teacher as ed me to play at her church. I accepted in awe that she was also a Presbyterian. I attended her church and played for =ing and Country#s .Crave/, Chris %ugust#s .Come Now 3ur =ing/, and most importantly, 3wl City#s version of .In Christ %lone/. I held myself in trying not to cry that day because God reminded me that, if it wasn#t for "im, I would#ve never been in an opportunity li e that. I fulfilled my goals for that year. I started over with God. I got superb grades, I lost weight, I preached a sermon on -anifesting God#s Glory, and I#m sure I also did manifest God#s glory. In Christ only, I am not sha en. In Christ only, we cannot be moved. In Christ only, you can find true *oy that, according to Philippians <>?, passes all understanding. I danced my way out of '()4 into '()< with *oy at the cross over service I had at my church. No matter how many than s we give to God, it would never be enough for what "e has, is, and will do for us. 6ven if our bodies were our mouths, it would never be enough. I than God. I#m grateful. 0he first few days of '()< I saw myself slac ing a bit. I cried more than I ever have in the first wee of !anuary. I cried because I didn#t want to be pulled away from God. I cried because I didn#t want to waste my life here on 6arth. 3ur days are numbered, and we have to caution what we do on 6arth. I wanted to go out and spread the $ord more. -y problem was how. "ow do I do that? It is more than merely saying .!esus is coming bac / and moving on. I started of with a two1wee fasting. I did not eat from @ am to @ pm and I could only drin water. I fasted for revival of my spirit. I want to become closer with the 3ne who created me. -y school is e+tremely diverse, so people with different beliefs and religions attend school with me. 0hose who claim to be Christians are the sames one persecuting, cursing and discriminating others. I want to be the light. I will be the light. $e have to be the light. It ma es me happy that people who have certain situations come to me because I#m .that Christian/. $hen they say than s, I always say in response, .0han God, not me./ It was God who used me to help them. $e need to continue spreading the $ord. $e cannot waste our time here. Ase the talents God has

given to you to glorify "im. Pray for one another. "elp one another. 2pend more time with God. 0each those around you about !esus and "is unfailing love. ,ove one another. ,ove is way more than se+, hugging, issing, hearts and all that lubby1lubby stuff. ,ove is caring for one another even though it could cause you pain. ,ove is treating everyone the same, even though they persecute you and may not have the same beliefs as you. !esus is love. !esus died in our place because he loved us.%s teen Christians, it#s our responsibility to go out and spread the $ord more. $e are the more social generation, so we have no e+cuse. No hesitation. 2pea truth, even though your voice may sha e. I#d rather die for God, than to stay alive and deny Christ. I am willing to die for my family, friends and strangers, even B!ohn ):>)4C. 6asier said than done, however. I pray that God will strengthen us and that we#d grow in faith, %ll in all, God#s not done. Not yet. %lways remember, I luh you. D4 But God loves you $%& more. "e#s not done yet. Not yet.