Lindsay Iseli Written Expression Project October 24, 2013 The student I chose to assess is a 9-year-old female in 4th

grade. For the purpose of this project Ill use the name Cora to refer to her. She is in the classroom I am student teaching and has been a joy to work with. She is one of the few students whom I have met that has a passion and love for school. Her parents have confirmed her love for school and willingness to work hard to succeed. She is thorough, meticulous, and strives to do her best work at all times. Cora uses her time wisely and completes mostly all tasks on time or early. She is willing to help other students, but also craves challenges. She is labeled gifted in language arts and thoroughly enjoys all components of this subject. She is excited about reading and reads above grade level. She has expressed her love for writing and is often asking for more time to write. Whenever Cora has free time, she is at work on a new piece or editing an old one. I had the opportunity to meet with her for the first writing conference in which she articulated her love of creating or recreating stories into written form. With her permission, I was able to read through the majority of her pieces in her writing binder. This section of Coras binder was filled with many differing types of writing. There were fiction, non-fiction, patterned, prompted, poetry, informational, and that is just the beginning. In comparison to other students her pieces section was overflowing with first drafts that could be taken through the writing process. After conferencing with Cora concerning her writing, she stated that she would like to work on organizing her writing and also conventions.

Assessment Results In the beginning of the school year during writing instruction we focused on reviewing writing techniques, conventions, and other components of the writing workshop. So far this school year, the students have been concentrating on different types of writing. Almost each day, a mini-lesson incorporates a mentor text that illustrates different kinds of writing. During the composing time, students were given the choice to write similar to the lesson, work on a previous piece, or add to the ideas section. Students have only taken one chosen piece through the whole writing process. For this assessment, I chose three pieces of Coras writing that she did entirely on her own and has not edited. The first piece (A) is a fiction story, the second (B) is a nonfiction story about a real life event, and the third (C) is a themed narrative. Cora had many pieces to choose from. However, after conferring with her, she expressed that she was particularly proud of these three pieces. When deciding which traits to assess, I found that her conventions were above grade level. Each sentence is capitalized and ends with a form of punctuation. She incorporates quotation marks, commas, and other punctuation in correct ways that were incomparable to the other 4th graders. I did not choose to assess word choice or sentence fluency for the majority of the same reasons. I decided not to assess ideas because the students were given new ideas, structures, and models each day. Therefore, Cora chose different ideas that she had already composed. Across all three samples of Coras writing, she tends to have a solid foundation and a sense of direction. She typically understands when to begin a new paragraph and illustrates a meaningful structure. Although she tends to lack elaboration, her writing presents a basic understanding of the structure of each type of piece she was attempting. Her sequencing of

events is at times sporadic, however it is clear that she was making rational choices about the order in which events should occur. In writing piece A, she gives an introduction, conflict, slight resolution, and ending. In writing piece B, she tells the story in the sequence in which the events occur. In writing piece C, Coras piece has a weak introduction and conclusion, and at times lacks a clear purpose. Overall, each of these pieces needs transitions. Often she writes so, once, and or just starts a new paragraph with a completely new idea. Transitions are sometimes needed, unclear, or missing. After reviewing her pieces with the organization-scoring guide, I thought her writing reflected a 4 overall (A=5, B=4, and C=3). Following the voice-scoring guide, I believe Coras writing samples reflected a score of a five overall. When I read each of these samples, I can clearly hear her animated and active voice shining through. She writes in an original and distinctive manner, especially for a fourth grader. Cora uses phrasing and punctuation to present each of the pieces in a spontaneous, lively, and enthusiastic manner. It is evident that the writer is present and aware of her readers. The writer utilizes her choice of words to reveal her thoughts and feelings, especially through writing piece B. She expresses the events sequentially, while also giving the reader insight into her inner feelings and thoughts.

Lesson Plan: Thoughtful Transitions Objectives: Writing SOL 4.7 h o Use transition words for sentence variety. o Link ideas within paragraphs using words and phrases Students will be able to incorporate transitions in writing. Students will be able to select a transition appropriate to the meaning of the sentence and to the continuity of the story. Students will illustrate their knowledge of appropriate transition use by writing using transition or bridge words they have learned. Materials: Student writing binder and writing samples 3x5 index cards glue scissors copies of lists of transitions or bridge words shown below Introduction: Read Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Tell students: Im going to read a familiar story to you. I want you to follow along on your copy as I read. Ask students: Did you notice that certain words were missing? Tell students: The missing words are transition words. These words provide a bridge between ideas. We use transition words to help make our ideas more clear to the reader and to develop the story in an organized manner. Ask students to cut out the list of words and glue on index card. Then, ask students to cut the card into 9 bridges so that one word appears on each bridge. Tell students: I want you to choose the appropriate transition or bridge words from our list for each of the blanks on your copy of the story I just read. Please work as a pair to decide which bridges to use. You can place your bridges on the blank lines. When you are finished share your selections with the class. Next Meanwhile So By Now Then Suddenly First At this Lastly

Guided Practice: 2nd Time: Follow steps in the introductory activity. Using the following word list of transitions or bridges

Ask students to notice similarities and differences between the word lists. Work in partners. Then, discuss as a whole class. Consequently Finally Initially Simultaneously Not surprisingly By this time Immediately

3rd Time (On their own) Ask students to select their own transition words or phrases to fill in some or all of the blanks to make the story even better. Students should be encouraged to use some words or phrases different from those on the previous two lists. Students may need to brainstorm in groups or as a class. If they need help, a few suggestions are: Next But Just then Then However Suddenly By now Very soon Because of this Afterwards At the same time

Ask students: Which of the bridge words do you think is most appropriate for this story? Why?

Assessment: Writing Prompt: The Three Bears have sued Goldilocks for breaking and entering, as well as damage to property. You are the judge who must decide whether she is guilty or innocent. State your opinion as to whether you think Goldilocks is innocent or guilty. Use examples in the story to provide support. Grading: Teachers are looking for students ability to focus on the prompt, to state an opinion and to develop their support using examples from the story. Also, teachers are looking for the students ability to correctly use the previously learned transition or bridge words and phrases. Conclusion: At the end of this lesson, students will have gained practice in deciding which transition or bridge word is appropriate from the lists and discussing their reasons for such. Additionally, students will have gained practice in choosing other transitional words or phrases to make writing a story more strong and effective. Resources: Adapted from http://www.geocities.com/fifth_grade_tpes/brfdges1.html http://www.writingfix.com/6_traits/organization.htm