Typical rapist not stranger with weapon 90% assault doesnt use force or threat of it 75% assaults committed

by someone victim knows Many dont resist the approach Unless theres consent, it is sexual assault; always assume a no Sexual assault doesnt discriminate on sexual orientation Sexual assault about power and violence, not sex Sexual orientation of the person is irrevelant Anyone can be victim of assault committed by person of any sexual orientation So all the cultural and dynamic factors that promote assault and their consequences equally apply to all sexual assaults Factors unique to LGBT can further complicate: misunderstandings, homophobia lead to more stigma, discrimination, violence May become motive for more sexual assault and is harder to report Establish consent through communication, but hard because diff communication styles, language, social pressures, alcohol Men straightforward so expect women to be straightforward, girls are subtle and expect guy to pick up Unclear comm can lead to lack of consent; unless there is consent, it is sexual assault Rape is about overpowering a person and controlling them The Language we use to describe sex contributes to the problem, unequal and violent view of sex that leads further to ideas of sexual assault The terms for a man sleeping with a girl=compliments; but girl with guy=insult Culture makes it seem like ok for man to have a lot of sex but girl no boys will be boys and she was probably asking for it Violent language-bang, nail, screw. All the terms are actions to a girl, not consent Men who use sexual language are more likely to commit sexual assault Pressures contribute to sexual problem: men pressured to have lots of sex (prove not gay, status, group achievement/conquest), women pressured to attract lots of men (feel more attractive, status, self-esteem, group status) If womens behavior of attracting men is misinterpreted, men can mistakenly believe they have consent Most things subconscious Alcohol: the number one date rape drug, present in of all sexual assaults on college campuses. Drunk or sober, need to have active consent, no excuse If shes drunk, not be able to legally give consent and resist Alcohol can be used as a weapon: 75% men use alcohol to lower womens resistance Expectations and communications: expect men to get more sexually aggressive and women get more sexual; even when not really intoxicated; clear communication is difficult (misread intentions and signs) 25% sexual assault on women, men are usually responsible, take an active role in not taking part in rape Dressing a certain way or in a particular location or how she acts isnt an invitation to sexual assault; need consent and can be withdrawn at any time

Rape != sex Rapes effects are the same for all situations P: Presume no unless you hear yes. C.R.A.P. Communication (opening the dialogue), Rape is not sex (side effects, rape if no side effects), Alcohol and drugs (not able to give or listen for consent), Peers (sexual aggressiveness toward sex, guy talk, strong group effect, sexist language and objectifying women) Acquaintance rape is just as bad as stranger rape. Greater personal trauma and issues of trust themselves and their judgment about people Protect against sexual assault (which both men and women can do): recog that psychologically coerced consent is not consent, using verbal judo (change the situation without creating conflict), warning signs for sexual aggressors (selfish, men in strong male social group, lack of boundaries/too touchy or talk about sex too much, too big gap in communication, excuses, charmers, over sexual/sexual macho, immature, charmer, trust issues*, drunk or stoned**, violence****). Most male on male rape is as an assertion of dominance, but female on male rape is possible Rapist is always at fault Coerced consent is still sexual assault Intervention when see signs, anti-rape position Rapists really respond to guys: stop guys from committing rape; (like the language problem). Power of positive peer pressure, look out for bad situations Most men would not rape and hate it, most power in stopping it Dating violence: no guy has right to hit, hurt or manipulate a girl, mainly about control problem Verbally abusive or extremely jealous Look at the girl: if wearing too much makeup and clothing or not allowed to hang out with other guys, bruises Encourage her to get some counseling, concern for them Stalking: 15% women report: versions are like sending repeated unwanted emails, calls, texts, show up unannounced or uninvited Sexual harassment: unwelcome, severe and pervasive any unwelcome intro of sexuality that creates an intimidating or offensive environment Sexual harassment: unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, verbal/physical conduct of sexual nature; when it starts to interfere or a threat Hostile environment harassment: verbal, visual, physical conduct Report the situation can lead to investigation can lead to disciplinary action; formal and informal procedures Take action when you see it happen Never the victims fault, rapist should feel ashamed Get safe (get away from assailant, dont shower or delete evidence), contact support, get med attention (maybe have internal injuries, date rape drugs checking, immediate contraception, antibiotics for STDs, contact rape crisis hotline), get counseling (get help from a friend, Post-Traumatic stress syndrome, a lot of problems, hard to trust other people again)

If friend got assaulted: just be there for them, dont judge try to get them medical attention, dont counsel them yourselves, prosecuting can be hard cus have to repeat many many times, ways to take action) Long term conditions