The Lament of Lust and Love

Written by Miles O. Peterson Pictures by Steven Mosley

Marie

Good Service
Holding my phone wishing it were you, So I can press the right buttons to get through to you. A message of how I feel girl, Giving you that good service, Five bars to make you Sprint and let you know You earned this. No model can touch your style, Ill hold onto you tight, Texting and calling so you can receive In coming all night. I dont mean to be rude Or rushing to be on your peak minutes, I can surely wait past 9 So there arent any limits To how long we consume And exchange sweet sentiments. I wanna eat you like a delicious Crumb Entenmanns, But I can tell its still early Before we can meet. Until then Ill keep downloading apps So I can be the best Bump you ever had, And you dont have to be mad Cause Ima wanna plug you in And put a ring on you. So we can start a family plan And Ill always be in to you.

Elastic
I know its wrong But thinking about us Seems to be like breathing: I cant seem to stop. Maybe its less passionate And more of an irritation, An unquenchable itch I scratch and scratch. Trying to relieve myself of These endless fantasies, No matter what I do I cant seem to get away. Not sure, but why now? We seem to be such a bad thing. I still love you, but I wish these thoughts were gone Out of my head And maybe my heart Nothats too drastic. We bounce back like elastic Whenever a slip falls our way. Hopefully, too many pulls And stretches Wont leave us out of shape. Although, things seem a little limp.

Run Away
Im ready to run away with you. Let go of this entire world And fly away with you. Hit the road Hit the sky Hit the sea Be alone with you until all I see Is you and the stars, Gazing into your eyes that reflect All our God has created. Hold my hand as I hold yours, Lets use the keys and lock the doors. Leaving it all behind Leaving it all behind Embracing this unity Far from business and busyness, Im ready to run away with you. Run far far away, Praying for wings so we can take off, Because I just want you, I just want you with me.

One Day Itll Be Right

I think I write love songs because I want you near. Feeling your affection overwhelming me is A Sweet ecstasy that I can only dream about, Because every turn we seem to make leads to No outlet, A dead end, A place where our tires just spin, And Im sick of wasting gas and inhaling These toxic fumes. Its ludicrous, its suicide. I mean doing the same thing expecting change Just makes me gnash my teeth and need Invisalign. I cant stop writing these songs about you though. Wishing and hoping one day, we can get it right, One day we can be together and itll just be right.

I Hope You Dont Mind

I hope you dont mind When I wrap my arms around you, Pull you close to me, Smell your air, and steal your body heat. I hope you dont mind When I stare into your eyes And gaze and gaze Hoping to find out whats on your mind. Trying to be a mind reader is not that easy. I hope you dont mind When its difficult to be patient And I desire you So I lead us down a slippery slope That I secretly dont regret. I hope you dont mind That this wait drives me crazy too. I might seem together, Well knitted and fitted, But in private I unravel with this pen: Scribbling thoughts. I hope you dont mind Im missing you always And Im horrible at letting you know That youre always on my mind. I hope you keep me there, And are longing for that day too. I hope itll come very soon So we can spend more of this time Together instead of dreaming.

Feel
Sometimes I wonder why God made the body To feel so good. At times, everything feels so good That I can lie in bed and Roll and stretch Breathe and curl And feel an uncontrollable ecstasy Flow through my nerves. Every sensory follicle on my flesh tingles Letting me know this is good. Im just lying in bed though, Alone, hands to my side Wondering and dreaming and wishing That I wasnt, Because something that feels so good Shouldnt be enjoyed alone, Because something that feels so good Cant be experienced by me alone. Im sure she feels the same When she lies in bed Next to me or even alone, She probably asks the same question Why would you make me this way? Having to struggle with temptation from The sheets that lay Gently across my skin, Driving me crazy wishing it was A person tempted by the same sin. At least then, it wouldnt seem so bad. At least then, it wouldnt seem so mad. Im glad though for this skin For this flesh and all I feel within, Every rush and tingle and euphoric crave, Because at some point Ill enjoy what youve made In a way thats explained without words. At that time I wont wonder anymore Ill be thankful for what youve made.

Common Sense
I never thought Id lose my taste, Or forget how things smell. I never thought I could lose my sight, And wonder how things feel. And now it seems your voice is Fading away, leaving me with nothing. But, this love for you hasnt given way, It must mean its more than common sense.

Shine On
The rays from the sun are too bright Forcing me to cover my eyes And shrink away. Im trying to keep myself from Getting burned again. Spending too much time In the light and warmth, Feels good and wonderful, But all youre left with is burns. Afraid to be in this new light, Still recovering, hoping my sunscreen Doesnt run away As I sweat with uncertainty. When Im standing in these rays, Bright and bold, Pushing UV so much its messing With my mind. Thinking this UV is you and me, But my doubts think otherwise. I could be wrong, Could be feeling a little overwhelmed And Im just on the brink of heat stroke. Im trying to shrink away, Because Im not ready for tans Or potentially getting burned. So just, give me an umbrella and a moment, And when things are good in my Heart and mind, Maybe Ill step back out into your glow. Hoping that you wont get tired of waiting And decide to shine somewhere else. I must remember even the sun takes Turns and moves around the world. Unless Gods got a special plan For you to stand still and shine on me.

JEM

I Cant Lie
I cant lie I want to hold you again. I want to embrace your flesh And kiss your body. I want to hear your breath quicken And know your enjoying yourself. I cant lie I want to see you In secret again And feel the embarrassment and fear Of what if we get caught? But, I know it doesnt matter Because its too late. Were so far gone It feels like time has stopped. I want to feel your legs, I want to feel your lips, I want to feel your breast, And feel you on me. I cant lie I wont lie I wish you would text me Just so, I know you didnt forget me Because I didnt forget you. Yet, I know Id have to run from you, Id have to forsake that crave To feel your smile against my lips, To feel that your lips have Curled up and I can feel your happiness. Id have to forsake my desire To see you standing there Dressed in blue Ready to

If we went further Hear one of us say I love you. Yet, I know it wasnt close to love, But the maxims of lust. Id have to forsake everything About that idea And I will But Every time I drive near your street To make that right turn Ill remember. I cant lie.

Burn
Burn Burn Burn I heard its better to burn And let this beast in me turn to ashes. Im asking and asking For the flames to be cut back, But the pain is necessary in fact. Waiting for the day of rest for my soul Groaning in expectation, Ima explode. Tapping out SOS in Morse code. I heard its better to burn And let this beast in me turn to ashes. Wheres my wife? Wheres my queen? God help me to not scream while These trials by fire try this heart of mine, Try this faith you have given me to soar. Battle bruises, burns of my choosing, I want to win, but I feel like losing. Burn burn burn Burn burn burn Turn the flames up Cause my lust has got to burn.

Stay With You

I wish I could stay with you. Find out how you are behind doors, See what posters and pictures You hang on your walls, And find out what music you like. I wish I could stay with you And spend time finding out What made you pick those sheets, Those curtains, that rug, Those chairs, See what kind of drinks You offer to your guest. I wish, I could stay with you just one night Away from rules and expectations, Just enjoying your company, Opening myself up to you So you could see a little bit Behind my door. I wish I could stay with you Just one time. We wouldnt have to do anything. Fall asleep watching a flick or two, It would be our little rendezvous, Nothing extravagant or too exotic Just two souls in communion. A social union of thoughts, Ideas and opinions, And if necessary Union of spirit, soul, and flesh. But, really I wish I could stay with you.

Trouble
If I dont shut my mouth Ill get myself in trouble. From my thoughts to my lips, From my brains to my hands, Im plotting some devious behavior That Im sure will get me in trouble. Im trying to tiptoe into Forbidden And make my way into Make Believe, When I shouldnt. I have more than enough, Chasing me, Desiring me, But, my yapping wont stop. Cant hold this tongue to keep quiet, Just shut up! Stop thinking you can be so smooth. Stop thinking they feel like you. Stop dwelling in Never Land And comeback home. I dont want trouble. I dont want problems. Even though you tempt me, I gotta defend me. Defend this heart, And this temple, From myself since Im devilish And planning a way to get all Jacked up. Juiced up on pride and pain, A little lust will make me vain. A monster I dont want to fight Its super strong like Bane. Stupid trouble Stupid lips Stupid thoughts God help me

This Forbidden
I never thought I would desire something so foreign. Completely different from what I normally feel, What Im normally into, What usually grabs my attention. If I told someone, my brother or sister, How I feel about you I dont think Id get any approval. Even now, writing this feels so wrong. Something about that veil and barrier That separates you and me, In more than one way, Makes my heart and beast lust for you more. The fact that youre hidden and set aside From the world intrigues me. Knowing if I was to make a move It would be suicide. Stepping on a line that calls for rebellion, Rebellion in your hands and in mine. There wouldnt be a way for us to meet Halfway without someone dying: Spiritually or physically, both are devastating. This forbidden lust This forbidden love This forbidden lust Pains me its rough I never thought you would grab my heart Im probably lying though, Because whenever were together Im hoping. Im hoping you feel like me. Wondering if I think hard enough

Youll feel my rhythm, And maybe your heart will Beat in sync with mine So we could see dreams come true. I got a feeling when we lock eyes you can See more than my hazel pupils, Because Im looking passed your Brown eyes and brown skin Trying to see how I can make Your heart flutter and your breath stop. Trying to find the right bait so I can Lure you away into my playground. Not to use or abuse you, But bring you delight. Something thatll make you second guess And bite. Although its all trouble from the inception Of this thought, Because my commitment to another Makes this forbidden and an error. Hurting my love by following lust Is such a terror. So, I pray that God breaks this flame I got for you. Please LORD drench it with a flood To wash away the glue That weve spread between us By spending quality time And picking each others mind. If you dont bring the rain Jesus Im sure this fire will rage, Making me harsh, Bitter, And rough to my commitment

And more lured by this forbidden. This forbidden lust This forbidden love This forbidden lust Ive had enough.

Secret Song
I swear whenever we meet youre more beautiful. My heart grows fonder, but I stay cool Making sure my secrets never leak. I got a muzzle on my heart so it wont speak. Hoping at some point these feelings will die Because I know its all really a waste of time. I dream though if things were bizarre In a different world where this love is hallowed, Set a part to enjoy between beats, Riding on the rhythm that takes a seat And keeps the mojo flowing, flowing. The show keeps going our souls are growing Fingers interlocked, hand holding. Id meet your parents, and you meet mine, Wed have nice dates, sipping on wine. Id want to be with you like all the time Since whenever were together I always smile , But, I wake up and reality is foul. Heart breaking to know that you can never know, Youll only see on the stage this orchestrated show That I pray comes to an end, Swiftly and doesnt come again Because a broken heart is hard to mend. Youre not the only one that this is for, You just happened to be the best trigger For this loaded round to slide out the chamber. If anyone wanted to, just push the fader And hear the secret song playing all along, Synced up right with this ticking time bomb. Waiting for you to clip the right wires and let this explode. Fiery passion that paints reds and glowing gold But, Im blue singing this song Cleaving to the Lords truth to carry on. This tragedy of a nice guy feels so wrong. The wheels will turn and Ill slide like pong, Basic and boring but captivating to some, If I ever told you my heart, wed be done.

Stay Cool
Im trying to keep my mind off her hips, And keep my eyes off her lips, Because her heart is what I really want. I gotta stay cool, man, play it cool; All I gotta do is say wasup.

Burden
Buying my life with 1s and 0s Seems to be more than enough To make things harder. To make things worse than they are, And I wonder how far, How far can I carry this burden? Keep carrying these thoughts Thinking, questioning, asking How will I keep up with the pace? How will I keep up with the crowd? When I know it wont last; Shinny, hip, and flammable, Because in the end itll fade, Fade away and it wont matter at all. Yet, I cant get this lust and envy out Of my heart or out of my mind.

Stop
Stop Dont look Stop Dont make eye contact Stop dreaming Stop trying to imagine Something that doesnt need to be Let her reflection fade away Keep your eyes straight Stop Dont look Stop Dont dream Close your eyes and remember Flee youthful lust Stop adoring Stop dreaming Close your eyes and drift Deep into the music Let these headphones squeeze your mind Squeeze those thoughts out Stop dreaming Stop staring Just stop

RENEE

Burning Bridges
Im glad that this bridge is burning Throwing kerosene into the mix So the process gets along a little quick Because my heart is far too sick To deal with these secrets any longer Im tired of fantasies, lies, and an alternate Universes that led me to be haunted By your face By your grace Your foolishness and loving fun demeanor If I explain more I might become meaner And let more words slide across the page Cant have that though Cant feed more into something like a parasite Ive found the problem and Im making the site Cloverfield Destruction to save the world Sending the Avengers to save me from this girl But Im glad its fizzling out Glad the last spark is growing cold And the glow is fading away Turning to ashes that Im hoping blow in the wind And are forgotten so I can move away from this sin Thankful the Lord forgives my failed tests

Remembering Im just flesh Who was twitter pated with the wrong one Oh well, thats how all love songs begun How every story was spun And how every war in Troy was done A heart throb, a pretty face Pearly whites and a derriere You can see from space Or maybe just a crush That leaves the dude crushed

Notice Me
Would you notice me If I smiled at you brightly? Would you notice me If I listened to you intently? Would you notice me If I loved you from a far? Would you notice me If I came to your rescue? Would you notice me If I cared for your wounds? Would you notice me If you broke my heart? Would you notice me If I fought for your love? Would you notice me If I stood with you through it all? Would you notice me If I was there to pick you up from a fall? Doesnt seem that way. Doesnt seem like you noticed at all. Seems like Im invisible And all of my love was a waste. So, I wonder Would you notice me When I dont return your calls? Would you notice me When I ignore your presence? Would you notice me When I pull away from you? Would you notice me If I acted like I didnt notice you? Would you notice then?

Wont matter, because its too late in the end.

Wasting Time
I must be wasting my time. Dont know why I didnt see this before, But Im pouring into something thats more Of a hassle; like a pail with a slow leak. Everything Im trying is just hitting the floor Yet, Im going back and forth To my hearts well trying to give All thats deep down inside of me. I must be wasting my time Being foolish and ignorant, Ignoring warning signs. Thoughts and feelings. I havent felt this bad since I got drunk. At least that was fun. This just hurts and makes me sick Angry, bitter, fighting resentment Trying to convince myself to find contentment Somewhere in these past years of labor. I cant blame you And I wont, but I must be wasting my time. Im not looking for a refund Or some compensation, Because there was happiness, There was pleasure and joy, But now, I cant see it and it sucks. Im walking in the dark. If things can get better, I hope they do, But right now I cant see it through. I dont want to waste anymore time. I dont want any more pain Or anymore heart breaks.

No more falls and acts of disobedience I just want to be happy I just want to be right I just want to spend my time On a positive investment Not a gamble.

Imperfect
Its easier to write and tell lies Instead of thinking of ways To end my life. Broken hearts lead to suicide And Ive thought about dying More than you think. Im sorry for being imperfect, I cant read minds and emotions Make me weird. I wish I could do better, but Ill keep hiding tears. Walking away feeling cold Because awkward moments get old. I wish it was easier than Having to stop Under street lights and let my Thoughts flow from this pen But, if I dont let the pressure within Come out Im sure blood will decide to run. Lord, help me. Im sorry for being imperfect. Maybe next time Ill kiss you Good night and hold you in my arms Instead of driving off thinking Of how I will harm Myself for being me. Imperfect little me Imperfect is all of me Im sorry.

Cold
I wonder if stress can kill Powerful and painful like a heart attack Its feeling like Im fading to black Laying on my back being crushed By enough weight to change my soul I know its my fault, but why are you so cold? Yesterday feels far away and tomorrow is John Doe. Im stuck with Today with no place to go Trapped so tight I need the Jaws of Life to know My sorrow from this self-inflicted show Of cuts and bruises No matter how I look at it Im losing Struggling with choosing right and right Good versus good and all of it could Make tomorrow brighter or something on fire Thats burning away to ashes and dust And you must know this isnt easy Trying to get back to the yellow brick road Leading down a path we both go on Journeying to the emerald city to get our wish I know I was a scarecrow lacking brains A cowardly lion and a heartless tin man But maybe you can click your heels And we can head back home Any place where it isnt so cold

Severed Lines
It feels like my heart is no longer in it. I cant tell if she can read it on my face, I hope not because it wouldnt help. Struggling to resuscitate something dying, Im trying, I really am no lying. Praying for wisdom, grace, and love Wanting things to be better for us, But I think my heart checked out. My thoughts are trying to get it together, Trying to get it all lined up, But theres an issue somewhere on the line And the message is getting lost. I hope this wont last forever. Having my heart and mind severed From one another is like walking blind. When youre trying to love I need it to be altogether, Altogether and right, Because feeling this way just aint right.

Uncertainty
The past seems present on these aged pages, Trying to understand where all of this came from Looking for answers in the old places of my mind That I've archived and put away to hide. All of this is difficult to deal with. I want answers, But hearing clearly is more of a challenge than I thought. You're fighting for something I thought we had lost seeing your struggle makes me question the cost of what to do next in all of this. Your heart and smile I surely miss, but I'm still not sure if it's really for us. Is it really His will for us to be? I guess we'll ride it till the end of the line And find out really what's the divine Plan for our hearts and hands to play. Entangled together or waving farewells, Whatever it is I just pray it tells of His glorious plan for our lives now and tomorrow, Joy or sorrow, I'm still not sure. Please, Lord help us to the core. Get to the heart of it, the meat of the beast And do what you must so that we have peace. No longer being tossed to and fro by winds of doubt But, resting in truth that we're on the right route.

Sad Tales
The bottom of this bottle is looking good to me; Seeing distorted through glass is likely The clearest Ive seen since its all happened. A tragedy in my hand as the ship sinks With many tears, you would think, but Im lacking. Even though my heart is broken and still cracking Whose fault was it? I cant really tell, But every tale told Im the one who yelled, Cried wolf, and made this fairy tale fail. Now with regrets Im trying to say farewell. Hoist up my sails and catch a brisk gust Cause I cant stay here anymore and trust That things will work out right for you and I. Wearing a smile would only be a lie On display for all to witness and experience Not knowing the pain from every remembrance.

Remorse
Im sorry, The pain of my decision is Starting to kick in. I knew it would be hard, But that doesnt mean I was ready. Ready to deal with losing you, And I wont be selfish and say you arent hurting. Id be surprised, but I could be wrong. Im sorry things turned out this way. Im sorry we dont talk, We dont see each other, And that weve grown apart. After years of bonding This has cut the line and forced A canyon between us. Im still believing this was right. Still believing that itll all work for good To those who love Him And follow His heart. Im counting the days before things Will change. When maybe I can move on And start making a new way A new path and a new life. Instead of wishing tears would Come when I realize how sorry I am.

Ghosts
Standing there I look to my right Remembering her is like seeing a ghost Just a phantom or outline Of what I use to love Seeing her naked body As she looked at mine There was no shame There was no fear Just peace and joy Lust mixed with love And excitement that we had gotten use to But now I cant seem to get use to Her not being there Or being anywhere Thoughts about this ghost just Remind me of how alone I am Standing there naked Vulnerable weak and fragile Remembering the pain and the separation I try not to look that way anymore I try not to believe in ghosts

Unicorn
You are my unicorn, You are my joy, You are my fable, Because no one would believe that we met. No one could imagine the mystical Union we experienced As the night crept around us. A mysterious being as yourself Gracing a mere mortal With your presence. I would be called crazy For speaking these tales, These testimonies I've gathered From what many see to be an allusive fox: Sly, cunning, Exotic, and transcendent. You are my unicorn, You are my joy, You are my dream that I never knew existed. You startled me awake And drew me into Slumberland Where magic became our reality And unsure moves became our playground. Exposing me to another side Of what was already hidden to most. Overwhelmed by the beauty I saw And now I try to hold onto fleeting times That will never come again. But, I can cherish the moments we were one, my friend.

You are my unicorn, You are my joy, You are my Zenith My burning star pressed against the black sky. You are my wishful thinking And gallant mirage, Where eternity bends for me to see A glimpse of the heavenlies. Broken by my despising heart, cuts from our crossing will always be deep, But I have no regrets from it all While I travel Repentance after another fall. You are my Unicorn, You are my joy, You are my harmony.