10 Gifts You Deserve to Give Yourself

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. Mae West This morning a close friend of the family passed away far too early. While Ive spent most of the day grieving Ive spent the last couple hours thin!ing a"out the fact that our lives are sometimes much shorter than we e#pect them to "e and that each moment is a miracle $ perhaps an o"vious thought that simply sin!s in a "it more on a day li!e today. %s I sit here one &uestion !eeps dancing around my mind' What can you do with your moments to ma#imi(e their value) %n answer that immediately comes to mind' *se them to give yourself priceless gifts no"ody else can give you+

1. %n open mind in full acceptance of lifes changes.

Youre not the same person you were a year ago a month ago or a wee! ago. Youre always growing. ,#periences dont stop. Thats life. -ometimes there are things in our lives that arent meant to stay. -ometimes the changes we dont want are the changes we need to grow. Growth and change may "e painful sometimes "ut nothing in life is as painful as staying stuc! where you dont "elong. The "ottom line is that you cant reach for anything new if youre holding onto yesterday. You may thin! holding on ma!es you strong "ut often it is letting go and starting anew in the present.

.. % meaningful path and purpose.

If your life is going to mean anything you have to live it yourself. You have to choose the path that feels right to Y/* not the one that loo!s right to everyone else. Its always "etter to "e at the "ottom of the ladder you want to clim" thanthe top of the one you dont. -o dont wait until youre halfway up the

wrong ladder to listen to your intuition. ,very morning as! yourself what is really important and then find the courage wisdom and willpower to "uild your day around your answer. In the end its not what you say "ut how you spend your time that counts. If you want to do something youll find a way0 if you dont youll find an e#cuse. (Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the oals and !uccess cha"ter of#,$$$ %ittle &hings 'a""y, !uccessful (eo"le )o )ifferently.*

1. The time to do what truly matters.

Identify whats most important to you. 2rune nonessential commitments. ,liminate as much as you possi"ly can of everything else. 3o wasted time no fluff no regrets. The mar! of a successful person is the a"ility to set aside the 4somewhat important5 things in order to accomplish the vital ones first. When youre crystal clear a"out your priorities you can painlessly arrange them in the right order and discard the activities and commitments that do not support the ones at the top of your list.

6. The space to 7, without needless worry.

If you thin! and you thin! and you thin! you will thin! yourself right out of happiness a thousand times over and never once into it. Worrying doesnt ta!e away tomorrows trou"les it ta!es away todays peace and potential. -top over8thin!ing everything. 9ife is too short. Your "iggest limitations are the ones you ma!e up in your mind. The "iggest causes of your unhappiness are the false "eliefs you refuse to let go of. You are capa"le of far more than you are presently thin!ing imagining doing or "eing. You will however "ecome what you ha"itually contemplate so clear your mind and let your hopes not your fears shape your future. :ow) ;editate. <un. -et your mind free.

=. 2ermission to "e imperfect as you grow.

You may not "e where you want to "e yet "ut if you thin! a"out it youre no longer where you once were either. You have good reason to "elieve that you can trust yourself going forward. 3ot "ecause youve always made the right choices "ut "ecause you survived the "ad ones and ta!en small steps in the right direction. >ocus on the right things and ?ust do the "est you can. Dont allow yourself to "e crippled "y stress and self8loathing. ,verything is only as it is. Theres no reason to let it destroy you. 7reathe. 9et every moment "e what its going to "e. Whats meant to "e will come your way whats not will fall away. %nd remem"er that a great gift may not always "e wrapped as you e#pect. (+ead &he %ast %ecture.*

@. <eassurance of "eing ,3/*G:.

Tell yourself 4I am ,3/*G:.5 %ccept your flaws. %dmit your mista!es. Dont hide and dont lie. Deal with the truth learn the lessons endure the conse&uences of reality and move on. Your truth wont penali(e you. The mista!es wont hurt you. The denial and cover8up will. >lawed and vulnera"le people are "eautiful and li!a"le. 9iars and phonies are not. ,very "eautiful human "eing is made entirely of flaws stitched together with good intentions and finished with uni&ue edges.

You are Y/* for a reason. Ignore the distractions. 9isten to your own inner voice. ;ind your own "usiness. Aeep your "est wishes and your "iggest goals close to your heart and dedicate time to them every day. Dont "e scared to wal! alone and dont "e scared to en?oy it. Dont let anyones ignorance drama or negativity derail you from your truth.

B. The right relationships.

3ot everyone will appreciate what you do for them. You have to figure out whos worth your attention and whos ?ust ta!ing advantage of you. If your time and energy is misspent on the wrong relationships or on too many activities that force you to neglect your good relationships you can end up in a tedious cycle of fleeting friendships superficial romances that are as thrilling as they are meaningless and a general sense of wondering why you always seem to "e running in place chasing affection. Choose yourself rather than settle for those who treat you as ordinary. Y/* certainly arent. 3ever settle for "eing someones 4option5 when you have the potential to "e someones 4first choice.5 You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with. If you hang with the wrong people they will "ring you down "ut if you hang with the right people they will help you grow into your "est self. The <IG:T people for you will love all the things a"out you that the W</3G people are intimidated "y $ thats what you need to loo! out for.

D. -elf8education.
%s ;ahatma Gandhi once said 49ive as if you were to die tomorrow. 9earn as if you were to live forever.5 9ife is a "oo! and those who do not educate themselves read only a few pages. When you !now "etter you live "etter. 2eriod. %ll education is self8education. It doesnt matter if youre sitting in a college classroom or a coffee shop. We dont learn anything we dont want to learn. Those who ta!e the time and initiative to pursue !nowledge on their own time are the only ones who earn a real education in this world. Ta!e a loo! at any widely acclaimed scholar entrepreneur or historical figure you can thin! of. >ormal education or not youll find that he or she is a product of continuous self8education.

E. % chance to touch your dreams.

,veryone dreams "ut not e&ually. Too many people dream only at night in the &uiet of their own minds and then awa!e to find it was all an illusion. Dont "e one of them. Dream "y the day instead. 7e one of the people who dream with their eyes wide open and who wor!s to ma!e them come true. <est when you are tired "ut dont give up. You never !now whats ?ust around the corner. It could "e everything youve "een wor!ing for or it might "e ?ust another mile mar!er on your ?ourney. ,ither way when you !eep putting one foot in front of the other one day the ne#t step you ta!e will "e the one that carries you to your goal. (+ead &uesdays ,ith Morrie.*

10. The freedom to e#press your whole truth.

The greatest and most gratifying e#periences in life cannot "e seen or touched. They must "e felt with the heart from the inside out. Theres nothing more inspiring than the comple#ity and "eauty of human

heartfelt feelings. -adly though many people let the fear of ?udgment num" and silence them. Their deepest thoughts and feelings often go unspo!en and thus "arely understood. Do 3/T let people invalidate or minimi(e how you feel. If you feel something you feel it and its real to you. 3othing anyone says has the power to invalidate that ever. 3o one else lives in your "ody or sees life through your eyes. 3o one else has lived through your e#act e#periences. %nd so no one else has the right to dictate or ?udge how you feel. Your feelings are important. Dont let anyone lead you to "elieve otherwise.

Your turn+
Which of the points a"ove are you struggling with) What gifts do Y/* need to start giving yourself) 9eave a comment "elow and share your thoughts with us.