16 The Family

16.1 Introduction
When we look around us at home, we find we are surrounded by members of our family. We treasure their love and affection. We know that whenever we need anything we can ask our parents, we can go to our grandparents when we want to hear stories. Mother is always ready with a hot and tasty meal for us. In short, almost all our needs are fulfilled within the family itself. However, let us ask ourselves some basic questions. What is a family? Who are the persons who constitute a family? What are the functions of a family? What are the common types of families in India? How can we maintain cordial relations within our families? This lesson will try to answer some of these questions.

16.2 Objectives
After reading this lesson, you will be able to:

describe the term family and explain the role of a family; identify different types of families; explain the reasons for the changing structure of the family; list ways by which relationships within a family can be improved; relate increasing population to the strain on available resources;

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16.3 What is a Family?

Family is universal and typically consists of a married man and woman, and their children. Take a look around. You will find that people do not live by themselves. They live in families. Even you live in a family. And it is not just in India that we live in families. This is the case everywhere. The fact is that family is universal. In other words, it is found in all societies, all over the world. You must have noticed the word married in the definition given above. Family implies marriage of the couple. Marriage provides legitimacy to the relationship between the husband and wife, and the children born as a result of it. Family also implies common residence for all its members. In other words, all family members live together in the same house. But you may also have seen that sometimes the father lives away from the family because of his job, which may be in another city. In such cases, even though the husband does not stay in the same house as the rest of the family, he is still considered a part of the family. Family consists not only of the married couple but also their children, both natural (born to that couple) and adopted (those that have been legally adopted by that couple).

16.4 Functions of the Family

Let us now see what different functions a family performs. 1. Protection

At birth, the young child is totally dependent upon adults for all its needs. Survival would be difficult without adequate care given by the family members. In fact, the family looks after not only the children but all the other members too. Caring for and giving protection to the children, the sick and the old is an important function of the family. 2. Emotional bonding

The affection and love received from parents and other family members is essential for the proper development of children. The emotional bonding which close family ties give, make children feel wanted and loved. They grow up to be betteradjusted adults than those who have not felt close family ties. 3. Education

The family is the first school of a child- where the dos and donts of society are learnt. Learning how to interact with others, learning to respect and obey elders,

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learning to be honest, etc., starts at home. The traditional skills are also learnt at home and the child is prepared for future roles and career by the family (you will read more about this in Lesson 21). 4. Financial security

The family acts as a provider for all its members. It provides the food, the shelter and the clothes that everyone needs. Other requirements of the family members are also fulfilled. The work in the family is divided among all the members. Different members perform different tasks. Some earn, some perform the household tasks. Take a look at your own family and make a list of all the things that each person in your family does. You will notice that through this division of labour, all the work gets done, and the basic needs of everyone are fulfilled. 5. Recreation

Family members act as companions to one another. There is always someone to play with or talk to. Also, celebration of festivals and events in the family like birth or marriage, etc., provide recreation to members. In short, we can say that the functions of a family are to: give protection provide emotional bonding educate the members provide financial security act as source of recreation

INTEXT QUESTIONS 16.1

1. Fill in the blanks using the appropriate words from the brackets: i) Family is made up of ................... man and woman and their children. (unmarried, separated, married, divorced)

ii) Members of a family have a ................. residence. (local, common, beautiful, separate) iii) Family is found .............. (only in India, only in some parts of the world, in many parts of the world, all over the world) iv) Natural children are the children ............... into the family. 2. Name the function of the family that is being fulfilled in the following: i) When a child is saved from a dangerous situation ii) When a child is taught the traditional skills .................... .....................

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iii) When a child is loved iv) When a child plays with others in the family

.................... ....................

16.5 Types of Family

We generally see two types of families in India - the nuclear and the joint family. 1. The nuclear family

The nuclear family generally consists of a married man and woman and their unmarried children. In some cases, however, one or more additional persons may be living with them, for example, the fathers unmarried or widowed sister. 2. The joint family

The traditional joint family consists of a man, his wife, his unmarried daughters, his sons and their wives and children. If the grandsons are married, then their wives and children are also a part of the same joint family. You will notice that a joint family is made up of a number of nuclear families living together under the same roof. They share a common kitchen and hold common property. The oldest male member is generally the head of the family and the decision-maker for the family. But the women also play a significant role in decision making as they influence the male members to a large extent.

16.6 Roles and Responsibilities of Family Members

Closely observe a nuclear and a joint family. In each case, find out which family member is responsible for carrying out which activity. For instance, who earns the money? Who does the cooking? Who decides what purchases are to be made? If there is a major decision to be taken, then who takes it? Every family member has a certain role to play. The manner in which these are carried out is reflected in the emotional his in the family. The personality development of the youngsters etc. These are different for nuclear and joint families. Let us find out in detail. Characteristics 1. Division of labour on the basis of age and sex Nuclear family The husband is responsible for earning money for the family. The wife looks after the house. When both the husband and wife are working, they share the responsibility of running the house and bringing up the children. Joint family The eldest male member manages the property and finances. The women do domestic work and child rearing almost exclusively.

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2. Independence

Children are actively involved in doing their own work. They become more self- reliant and independent. They have greater self-confidence and learn to take initiative.

Members are expected to cooperate with each other to complete the familys tasks. For example, if a baby is crying and the mother is busy, any other person will automatically attend to the baby. Children, thus, learn to depend and rely upon each other. Decisions are taken exclusively by the male members and women and children are rarely consulted. They have no say in any family decisions. Since husband and wife do not share household chores, there are fewer interactions and lack of privacy does not let strong emotional ties between husband and wife develop. Cousins are very close to each other. This provides stability to the family members.

3. Involvement of children

Decisions in the family are taken jointly by the parents. As children grow older, they are also involved in the decision making of the family and their opinion is valued. Greater interaction and privacy lead to stronger emotional bonds between the husband and wife. Children receive all the love, affection and guidance from their parents, so they become very at-

4. Emotional attachment between family members

ADVANTAGES OF NUCLEAR AND JOINT FAMILIES After reading the previous section, can you list the advantages of living in a nuclear or a joint family? Let us do so here. Advantages of living in a nuclear family 1. 2. 3. It encourages initiative, independence and self reliance among its members It encourages decision making among the children, which gives them greater self-confidence. There is considerable privacy and opportunities for the members to interact with each other. This results in deeper emotional ties among the members It encourages family members to be cooperative and accommodating.

Advantages of living in a joint family 1.

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2. 3. 4.

In the event of death of parents, a child finds adequate emotional and economic support. It cares for the old, the helpless and the unemployed in the family. There is more financial security.

Can you now list the disadvantages of living in a joint family?

INTEXT QUESTIONS 16.2

1. Fill in the blanks with the most suitable words from the bracketsi) ii) iii) iv) Nuclear family encourages in the children.(dependence, independence, irresponsibility, timidity) In a nuclear family, the parents and children are emotionally . (close, distant, apart, indifferent) Division of labour in a joint family is on the basis of (income, age, sex, sex and age) .. offers more opportunities for husband and wife to interact with each other. (nuclear family, joint family, both nuclear and joint families, neither nuclear or joint family) In a joint family, children are attached to their own parents, brothers and sisters. Children in a nuclear family are more self-confident. Children and adults participate equally in decision making in nuclear and joint families. Death of a parent is less traumatic in a joint family. dependence independence strong emotional bonds privacy cooperation

2.

State whether the following statements are true or falsei) ii) iii) iv)

3.

State whether the following traits belong to nuclear or joint familyi) ii) iii) iv) v)

16.7 Factors Contributing in Changing Family Structure

Over the years, the structure of the family has been undergoing a quite change in India. There has been a change in the occupations and style of living of people due to which there has been a shift from joint to nuclear families. Let us see what other factors have contributed to this change.

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1.

Industrialisation- Earlier, people were engaged in agriculture which encouraged the joint family. But when income from agriculture proved to be inadequate, some people moved to cities in search of better jobs. As the rural youth got better education, they also moved to cities for better paid jobs. This migration has led to the breakdown of the traditional joint family. Large size- When the size of the joint family became unmanageable, some sons moved out and established nuclear families. Education and employment of women- As women got better educated, they started taking up jobs outside the home. These women were more confident and enterprising. This also contributed to the gradual breaking up of the joint family.

2. 3.

16.8 Family Relationships

Look at your own family. How does each member of your family get along with the others? Is there fighting or arguing among the members or are the relations cordial? Is there any member of your family who quarrels a lot? Is there a member who always tries to maintain peace in the family? It is important to study questions of this kind while talking about or analyzing family relations. Family relations depend on the way every member behaves and interacts with each other. Let us look into some of the factors which can make or break relations in a family. Factors which make relations Trusting behaviour Having no expectations from others Overlooking minor mistakes Looking after other peoples comforts Sharing and cooperative Loving and caring Factors which break relations Mistrusting everyone Expecting a lot from others Criticizing and arguing Selfish and self centered Interfering in others affairs A couldnt care less attitude

It is not necessary that a person, who is responsible for spoiling relationships, has all the negative characteristics. One may be loving and caring and is willing to overlook omissions, gives due respect but may also be extremely selfish. It is this selfish nature of the member, that spoils things for him and others and suppresses even the good qualities in him. In fact, it once again proves the point that family relations are very tricky and delicate and take tremendous efforts from everyone to maintain.

16.9 Increasing Population - A Strain on Resources

What is Indias population today? Well, it has crossed the 100 crore mark! This is why we see a large number of people anywhere we go. The market, the roads, hospital or doctors clinic, train and railway station, bus and bus stop - everywhere there are

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people and more people. This means that whatever resources we have - money, land, houses or food - all are being shared by more and more people. If we look at a family, we find that the income remains more or less the same over the years and they continue to live in the same house. But the members of the family increase as the couple has more children. So, the same income is used to buy more food for more mouths, more clothes and more people sleep under the same roof. There are more tensions in the family as each member tries to grab more for himself/ herself. Can we allow this kind of situation to continue? Definitely, no! It is extremely important for all of us to remember that our resources are limited and we have to be careful in using them. It is the responsibility of the family to give the best possible to the children in terms of food, clothing, education, good housing, etc. This is only possible when each family restricts the number of children born. This will help in improving their quality of life and make them well adjusted members of the society.

INTEXT QUESTIONS 16.3

1. Point out the false statements and correct themi) ii) iii) iv) v) 2. i) ii) iii) iv) v) 3. i) ii) iii) iv) v) Growth of industries is am important cause for bringing about changes in the joint family system. The employment of women has hardly had any effect on the traditional joint family system. Sharing and cooperating in a family strengthen relationships. Family members must always have expectations from the others. The size of the family has no relationship with the resources available. employment of women outside the home family planning conflicts in the family education of rural youth early marriage Lack of communication between family members increase in family size love and cooperation between family members employment of women outside the home having many expectations from others

Identify the factors that have lead to the break up of the joint family system-

Identify the factors that strain the family relationships-

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16.10 What You Have Learnt

In order to make it easy for you to remember, here are the main points of the lessonJoint break up of joint family leads to formation of smaller

FAMILY Nuclear

Functions

Relationships

Size

give protection provide emotional bonding educate the members provide financial security act as source of recreation

Need to be nurtured with love and care

must not strain available resources

16.11 Terminal Exercise

1. 2. 3. 4. Explain in your own words what you understand by a family. Describe at least two differences you find in the different types of families around you. Give two valid reasons for the break up of the joint family system in India. List two actions you can take as a peacemaker in your family.

16.12 Answers to Intext Questions

16.1 1. i) married 2. i) protective iv) recreational ii) common ii) educational iii) all over the world iv)born iii) emotional iii) sex and age iii) f iv) T

16.2 1. i) independence ii) close iv) nuclear family 2. i) F ii) T

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3. i) Joint iv) Nuclear 16.3 1. i) T iv) F 2. i) , iii), iv), 3. i, v

ii) Nuclear v) Joint ii) F v) F

iii) Nuclear iii) T