Presence

Exercise: Imagine if you were instantly transported from where you are right now, into a
situation where it was kill or be killedwhere you had to save someone that you cared for or risk
your life for a cause that you believe in. If you were in a situation like that, would you be able to
access the primal part of you that you need to survive?
Here are some examples of what I might notice about being fully within Me
My back feels a little tight.
I feel interested in what Im reading right now.
Im feeling curious about what comes next.
Im feeling excited by this new information.
I can hear the conversations of the people around me.
I am aware of the presence of the people around me.
I can see the people around me.
Here some examples of what I might notice looking at me through her experience of me.
I can see that Me! seems agitated, uncomfortable or really relaxed.
I notice that Me! seems a little tense.
I see that Me! is very focused on what I am reading.
I sense that she is aware of me and can feel my attention on her.
I feel that she has an emotional heaviness.
I feel that she would welcome my presence.
Here are some examples of what I might notice about looking at U through ! "HI#$
%E#&'( experience of U )or *E+
"here is some tension between us.
#he seems agitated with me.
Im leaning into her personal space.
#he keeps looking away every time I try to make eye contact.
I seem very focused on getting her attention.
$r
%e seem really comfortable with each other.
%e are both leaning in toward each other.
&er eyes keep scanning my body.
#he hasnt looked away once, as if no one else is here.
My hands hang loose and comfortable at my sides.
I appear solid and comfortable in my body.
,eel yourself )I+
Excercise' #(em becsuk, m)lyeket l)lege(, )s koncentr*l+unk test,nk minden r)s()re k,l-n,
)re((,k a( abb.l +-v/ )r()seket. Men+,nk v)gig e((el minden porcik*nkon, ahol falba ,tk-(,nk
0picit tomp*nak )re((,k1, ott koncentr*l+unk +obban r*, am2g a s(en(orok be nem kapcsolnak.
#tretching, exercise, and using your voice allow you to be more 3resent in your body. "his
particular practice involves all three aspects. It is a stretch, a vocal pro+ection, and it takes some
physical effort.
4ever hold back emotions, it disconnects you from the woman. $wning your emotions, without
collapsing into them is very sexy to woman. %hen you suppress, you cant feel others, and
woman cant feel you.
Owning 5our 6motions! - Collapsing Into 5our 6motions!
"he first one is incre.ibly sexy to women.
"he second one is incre.ibly un/sexy to women.
%hen you own your emotions you allow yourself to fully feel whatever emotions arise,
while remaining fully centered and aware of who you are. "his means you could literally
be crying, even sobbing, and still feel totally solid and have women melt in your 3resence. "his is
rare and valuable because it takes a kind of emotional strength that women recogni(e.
5oure not about to explain your emotions, +ust to feel them. 6ven say them out aloud
0acknowledge them1, with 3resence allows you to own them. %omen light up when they can feel
you connected to your emotions e0en if it(s sa.ness.
"rying to .o %resence will always result in lack of %resence. I know1 it(s a little
tricky1 but 2ust like water there is no substance like it on earth. 3ou can(t make
water. In the same way1 you can(t make %resence. It(s something that you ha0e to tap
into. !n. 2ust like water is the lifebloo. of e0erything li0ing on the planet1
%resence is the lifebloo. of e0erything that comes to life when relating with women.
&wning your space )you+
Excercise 0expanding your awareness1' 7 simple exercise is to imagine you are filling the
space with your awareness by visuali(ing yourself reaching out and touching the four walls of the
space you are in at the same time.
4igger excercise: 7 lot of guys are intimidated by beautiful women and for that reason it can
be hard getting into 8nd position and genuinely seeing the world through their eyes. 7 great place
to start is with senior citi(ens, simply because they are generally the least threatening place to
start. #o lets say that youre on the bus and you see an elderly woman sitting across from you.
6verything moves faster than it used to.
5ou feel tired easier and things weigh more.
3eople are dressing in all kinds of strange new fashions.
5ou dont understand technology very well.
7 lot of your friends and almost all of your family have passed away.
"he young man 0you1 across the isle keeps looking at you.
5our grandchildren are the light of your life.
5ou dont remember things so well anymore.
5our feet hurt.
5oure looking forward to being safe and relaxed in your own home.
$k, so how about a beautiful woman at a bar now?
5ou feel annoyed, or perhaps flattered, at all the men staring at your breasts.
5ou feel safer tucked in close with your friends.
5ou wish someone would come and talk to you.
In middle school you were an ugly duckling that had to wear an eye patch and
everyone made fun of you.
5oure afraid that youre not good enough to be with these other girls.
5ou dont know if youll ever find a man who will really make you happy.
Exercise: 9eally put your attention on closing down your 3resence. &ow deep inside yourself
can you pull it in? If you saw someone you didnt want to know or where trying to hide from
soldiers in enemy territory, how far inside yourself could you pull it? &nce you .isco0er how
you close .own you can use that information to open up. :o the opposite, watch yourself as a
;ig ;ang, visuali(e and feel yourself moving outward in all directions at once. 7s you do this,
your ga(e will become wider and more spacious. If you can start to recogni5e where you close
.own in the moment1 you can use that to instantly open up instea..
*omen can feel us the same way tuning forks will resonate with each other.
Excercise' &a t<ls*gosan fe+ben vagy, l)g(/ gyakorlatokkal )s tested megr*(*s*val ker,l+ le a(
als.bb r)s(ekbe is, 2gy les( tel+es a +elenl)ted. 4e pr.b*l+ mindent +.l tenni, csak vedd el/ a
mas(kulin von(er/det.
=#ight with your .esire! means being willing to fully feel your attraction.
"he more present you are1 the more ra.iant woman you will attract.
More present will polari(e the woman more, and bring out more of her feminine.
6reating polarity )we+
#eeing the actual dinamic of the relationship from outside. Its two different energies that
compliment each other, and creating and upward spiral where musculine empowers feninine, and
so on.
'o science1 no pill1 no smooth talking1 fancy clothes1 courses1 or coaching that you can get
will change who she is. 4ut what you can .o is find the perfect complement, within yourself
0+elly1 to her particular flavor 0peanut butter1 in that moment and watch how she suddenly opens
right up like the perfect chemistry.
&er radiance brings out our 3resence
!'$
$ur 3resence brings out her radiance.
"his is %olarity.
Excercise' 06l/tte el/k)s(2t)s, l)g()ssel, kiter+es(t)ssel.1 "he exercise that >ictor is about to
experience is more than +ust a game. "he woman says a color and >ictors +ob is to echo it back
to the point where it seems as if they are speaking at the same time. :oing this well involves
?being extremely 3resent with a woman.
I want you to get that color the exact moment that she is saying it. 7s close as you can get it
without getting tight or trying too hard, +ust by virtue of you being right there with her. @et that
game be what motivates you to tune in with her even more.!
#hort attention span party girls! are the way they are because they do not experience a lot of
men with depth. 5ou can actually start bringing depth and, if you do it right, its like a vortex that
sucks them in. 6ven though all women have the tendency to test men, Aendra notices that if she
tests a man and his 3resence remains solid and intact, her desire to challenge him tends to go
away and almost feels silly. Men who can stay %resent through her range of emotions are
highly .esirable. E0en polarity can be uncomfortable.
If youre in a social situation and you .on(t know what to .o with your han.s, its a sign that
you(re not %resent. %hen youre fully 3resent in your body and in the moment, youll find that
your hands naturally become engaged in your conversation or +ust hang comfortably.
%resence 7illers
$ne of the easiest ways to kill 3resence is by trying to make something happen instead of +ust
allowing things to unfold naturally. Bor 6xample, when you are interacting with a woman, trying
to be 3resent in order to have her like you more, as opposed to +ust being 3resent.
8. $istraction' repetitive motion that serves unconcious diversion 0tapping foot, looking out,
talking fast, fidgeting1. Its a way of masturbating your energy out. @ike drumming on thighs.
9. 6ontraction' creating tension somewhere in your body, in order to avoid uncomfortable
feelings. 3ressing your hands opposed they numb out.
"his creates the kind of interactions with a woman where you could finish her word, sentence or
thought, because you are so connected to her. 7s soon as you notice that youre 3resent you
are no longer 3resent.
Exercise: Co ahead and try it with a woman in your life so that you can experience getting into
that state yourself. $nce youve got his down you can take that way of being into your other
interactions with women. Aeep in mind that you can always take this exercise to a deeper level.

Appreciation
%hether your interaction with another person is subtle or extreme, every time you interact with
another human being youre sharing an experience with that person.
5ou have two fairly straightforward options here'
D. 3ou can be a 'o1 and re+ect what is happening during that experience. $r
8. 3ou can be a 3es1 and welcome and embrace that experience. If you are a yes,! women
will say things like I feel so gotten,! or I feel so seen,! or &e saw right into me,! etc.
4eing a 'o involves reactively withdrawing from an interaction, or trying to control, fix, or
otherwise change it. 4eing a 3es involves noticing and allowing whatevers arising in the
moment. Brom this place, you may choose to withdraw, or take steps to effect a change, but from
a place of free choice, not from a place of reaction. %hen youre being with women this way,
you can notice .eep truths about them that have them feel profoundly seen! by you.
$oing 7ppreciation could look like a woman at a birthday party receiving gifts and saying
thank you! with an overly?cheery smile that doesnt seem real. 7nd even though it looks like
shes really happy about the gifts she was given, you can feel on a deeper level that she wasnt
really all that impacted.!
4eing in 7ppreciation could look like a father saying thank you! to a fireman who +ust saved
his sons life. "he words arent that special, but the look in the fathers eyes, the depth and
resonance of his words, and the feeling that radiates from him, says it all.
The gateway to it was being a yes to even the discomfort, even the things you dont want to
look at or dont want to feel.
In order to really experience the uncomfortable parts of your life 0which makes available the
+uicy, rewarding and exciting parts of your life1 you must be a yes! to whatever is happening,
accepting whatever is so. Cuys who tend to ha0e more rewar.ing li0es exhibit whats called
no0elty seeking beha0ior.! "his means that these men find something novel! in every
experience. "hese men truly en+oy discovering someone elses world. 4eing a yes .oes '&"
mean you ha0e to agree or take on anything someone else says. 5ou can understand'
%ow, youre really mad at me. 7nd while this is clearly true for you it doesnt mean that Im
going take on your experience or that theres anything wrong with me.!
E:E#6IE )"HE H!ME/$EM&;I"I&' <!ME+: %herever you are a no! to other
people, you are a no! to the same thing in yourself. Bor example, if youre +udgmental of people
who are focused on themselves, then you +udge yourself about it as well. #o wherever theres
+udgment, its a place where youre not $A! with yourself. "his means that you are 7#&7M6:
of that part of you. 7nd #hame is probably the ;ICC6#" killer of attraction and connection with
women. If you dont fully accept yourself other people are going to have a hard time accepting
you."he good news is that #&7M6 tends to go away when its existence has been fully
acknowledged. 7s soon as you are able to say Im ashamed about EEEEE,! or I think the fact
that I EEEEE is wrong,! you are on the way of purging shame. 5ou still may not choose to engage
in those activities because of the impact that creates, but its not because it means something
about 5$F 0that youre wrong1. Make a list of all the things about yourself that you .o not
accept or are ashame. about. Brom here, your work is to do what it takes to get those things off
the list, one by one, by getting coaching, therapy, workshops, +ournaling, etc anything that
cultivates more awareness and compassion for those parts of you. More exercises on how to
cultivate self?acceptance to follow
;ike %resence1 !ppreciation is sometimes easier to un.erstan. by clarifying what it(s not.
6onsi.er that if you fin. yourself whining1 bitching or complaining1 e0en in a subtle way1
that(s a sign that you(re not in !ppreciation.
E:E#6IE ),rame <ame+: Imagine that youre talking to a woman and your eyes are like an
old fashioned camera. 09emember the kind that actually used film? It helps the visuali(ation if
you actually imagine hearing the sound of the shutter click1. 4ow imagine that you randomly
take a snapshot as youre speaking with her and time free(es for a moment.
%hat do you notice about that picture? %hat are your thoughts? &ow do you feel, in your body?
%hat is it that you pick up about her? 0&ey, relax. "ime is fro(en. 4o need to rush.1 %hat do you
notice about her energy? 5ou know, her particularvibe!?
%hen youre so aware of a woman that you can really speak the moment with her,! she comes
into a particular =uality of focus where you see her more clearly, it happens both ways.
Cuys will bring their energy 0awareness1 inwar. in an attempt to feel less vulnerable 0a primal
response1 and then upwar. 0a more modern day response1, because it puts them in their head
where they can try to figure out the situation instead of experience the uncomfortable sensations
of anxiety in their body. Bor clarity this means feeling grounded in your body, feeling your
connection with her, taking her in with your eyes and then continuing to feel your connection
with her in your body. "his is represented by the second position diagram.
et her meet you halfway at least. The moment where you let her impact you, thats the
moment where you werent trying to appreciate and you actually were appreciating, thats
where she felt it the most. !ont go "out there to appreciate her# let her impact you, its
basically the difference between "doing appreciation $"%m going to go out there and
appreciate&' as opposed to (ust actually )ppreciating.
&ow to create lust' "he go first rule applies here. 5ou must be really present, feel your
attraction 0its not the same to feel she is hot1, and own it 0appreciating, and being yes to it, dont
feel that its wrong in some way1. Its bold to go first, because it makes you vulnerable, and at the
same time this makes you attractive for the girl. "here are guys that go up to women an. say1
;et(s ha0e sex1 an. the women actually say yes. !lthough if a guy is thinking I ha0e to
ha0e sex with her1 I ha0e to ha0e sex with her1 I ha0e to ha0e sex with her1 then he is
probably not going to get a positi0e response. If he(s thinking1 yes or no is a fine answer1
!'$ I want to ha0e sex1 then attraction can be create. through his expression of lust.
"here(s a feeling of rightness1 clarity an. spaciousness associate. with a man who can own
what he wants1 without ha0ing to get anything.
*+reaking her heart, %n the moment it feels like its all there is. -o if my heart is broken it
often feels like nothing is ever going to change, thats all there is, sinking into a really deep,
dark, vulnerable place and in some moments wanting to (ust shut everything out, you know,
push everyone away in order to create my own safety. %ts not "youre keeping in perspective
your whole life and how great things have been and how things will be better later. %ts like
infinite despair, like a black hole abyss of gloom and heartbreak and loss and its that intense
for you. Opening her heart is similar to breaking it. If you want a truly expressive, radiant
woman in your life, full of femininity and sexuality, then you need a woman that has access to
her entire spectrum of emotions. %hen you can hold space! for her to feel safe to go through her
natural emotional cycle, then she can fully experience herself.
Its important to understand this doesnt mean feeling sorry for her or trying to fix her. 03lease,
do not try to fix herG1 It simply means being with her,! and having her feel totally heard and
seen and felt by you,! without making anything wrong.
hare. humanity 0in 8nd position, presenceHappreciation1 is when you realise that she is also a
person, +ust like you with her own dreams, and insecurities 0dont relate to her as a conIuest, or
target1. #hared &umanity is simply caring about the other persons experience, whether youve
+ust met them or known them for a long time.
E:E#6IE:4ext time youre out and you see a woman youJre inspired to meet.
tep 8: Cet really 3resent and notice if' #he seems really nervous right now. #he seems actually
really sad about something.!
tep 9: #tart to 7ppreciate what it is that youre getting 3resent to with her and from that
place, start to get curious about her. %hat is her sadness about?!
! lot of times men will relate to their turn/on as something they nee. to hi.e or 0eil. "he
truth is that when a man can feel his arousal an. fully own it without nee.ing it to be
anything other than a pleasurable rush for him1 then he is appreciating the experience he is
ha0ing. *hen a man .oes this it is 0ery impressi0e to a woman. o1 feeling your turn/on is
one thing. 4eing 0ulnerable )allowing her to see it+ with that turn/on is another thing. 4ut
actually ,EE;I'< an !ppreciation of that turn on is a whole other thing.
%hen youre doing shared humanity it comes with soul 0ision, because its not a laser beam, it
radiates from you, which helps you to see others under their skin.
E:E#6IE )oul -ision+ 7s you go through your day?to?day life, consider all the people you
come into contact with. 9eali(e that theres an entire life across from you thats the center of its
own universe +ust like youre the center of your own universe. *hat might be going on
within another person(s uni0erse>
6apti0e au.ience' Most guys dont reali(e that an interaction where both people feel enlivened
afterward can only come as a result of an interactive dance! 0a two way exchange of energy1. If
its one way 0you talk all the time1, then youre not appreciating. &ow to deal with it when
someone holds you in K7? 5ou mustnt make himLher wrong, +ust appreciate and still speak the
truth about what you are experiencing with himLher.
<etting hare. Humanity ? -liminess gone.
<etting in touch with <enuine 6uriosity ? Captive )udience gone, awkward silences gone.
%hen you are in appreciation, its tempting to made an impression, but keet it real 0curiosity1.
$on(t ask *hy> "he actual interpretation has nothing to do with the experience, so dont
separate her from her emotional side 0it shoots her back to her head1.
Men usually ask why! when'
"hey want an explanation or a theoretical answer.
"heyre trying to be her therapist or problem solver and help her get Mfixed.
"heyre trying to get her out of her emotions and into a more logical, structured reality
that works better for them.
E:E#6IE )<enuine 6uriosity+: 3ractice taking 8nd position 0imagining what its like to be
another person1, and from that place, C6" KF9I$F# about them. "his could be with a stranger,
friend, family member, or a woman youre dating.
7sk them Iuestions that arise out of your Cenuine Kuriosity, while avoiding why! Iuestions.
Bocus on the emotional aspects of what its like to be them 0this is usually the most challenging
part for guys1, allow Iuestions to arise naturally, and take the ride! of what its like to be them,
as they share their experience with you. 7fter you ask these Iuestions, you may ask what it was
like for them to answer the Iuestions you asked ? get some feedback on how they experienced
youG
!nalogy: Imagine a massive, titanic si(ed ocean liner. That is the interaction. 4ow imagine the
one little guy whos in charge steering this floating city. That is the subtle energy that guides the
interaction. Kompared to this enormous structure, the guy steering is +ust a teeny little speck, but
its that teeny little speck that wields all the power over the direction of the ship.
Case and point, Appreciation is not compliments, its not trying to have her feel good, its
not necessarily sharing your thoughts about things, that actually created less connection
here. This is about awareness. Noticing the places where you go on auto pilot and
disconnect or stomp on attraction. (Being a yes to your awwardness! feel it, and say out
loud with a smile."
'ot the wor.s of the =uestion1 but the intention behin. the =uestion1 is what makes the
connection.
"he %ower of -ulnerability
>ulnerability, for guys, is often one of the most dreaded Id rather +ump out a window then
experience it! kind of feelings.>ulnerability is an intense emotional state to feel in your body that
people will go to great lengths to avoid feeling. Interestingly, of all the emotional states, it is also
the easiest emotional state to access. In order to feel it all you have to do is approach a woman.
&eres the irony of vulnerability. %hen we really allow ourselves to fully feel vulnerability in our
body, women feel it in their bodies too. "hey rarely feel this way around men because most of
men havent cultivated the desire to experience and own! that uncomfortable energy. Imagine
that a woman is with a man, and in his presence she feels intensely turned on. &owever, the only
way she can feel intensely turned on is because he is also feeling it in his body and owning it.
7ny man who can do this is experienced by women as solid, steady and ama(ingly present.
%omen can feel overwhelmed in his presence because what they are feeling is what he is feeling.
It is only because he owns! it that he can be so solid and steady while experiencing it himself.
4ow, when youre in that intensely vulnerable state and you fully allow yourself to feel it,
embrace it and own it without trying to resist it in any way, and "&64 you approach a woman,
sheMll definitely feel the intensity of that vulnerability in her body too.
Isnt it ironic that at the center of the very thing that we a0oi. is the very thing that we want?
"HE %#&6E ,&# I'"E<#!"I'< "HEE ;E!#'I'<
D. Birst youll look back on your interactions and see where you did this. $h yeah, I see what I did.!
8. "hen youll catch it after you do it. I did it againG!
N. "hen youll catch it right in the moment and even perhaps speak it. %ait a sec, I am starting to do my
thing again.!
O. "hen youll find yourself catching it right before it happens. I could feel myself starting to go there.!
P. "hen at some point youll reali(e that you havent done it in Iuite some time. Instead of being I4 the
storm as youre climbing the mountain, youre now 7;$>6 it. @ooking down, you can now see the storm
below you. 5ou can still hear its distant rumble and yet you know that it has no real power over your life
any more.
5ou must be a =yes! even to screwing things up
"he only rule is that you must allow your real curiosity to gui.e the =uestionsQ you cant ask
something unless you actually want to know the answer. "his is so A65, my friend. If youve
studied outer game techniIues then you may have an entire buffet of opinion openers, games and
routines at your disposal. ;ut the most exciting, satisfying and sexy interactions occur when
youre truly in the moment, letting a fresh experience unfold, which is edgy for you both.
7gain, if you find yourself acting like her coach! or her Mtherapist! then youve got the wrong
idea completely. "his is about simply en+oying her ride as you go on it with her and creating
deeper intimacy and connection as she feels heard and seen and felt by you.
@uality of your ga5e' "heres a particular techniIue in the 3ickup Kommunity! that is meant to
help men take the edge! off of their anxiety about approaching beautiful women. It basically
involves seeing or imagining a flaw! about her so she seems less perfect and therefore less
intimidating. ;y this point, hopefully, you can see that looking for or imagining her flaws is not
only the exact opposite of 7ppreciation, but, as would be expected, produces less than stellar
results.
Exercise )7ino -ision+: %e tend to label the things that we look at. If we touch something,
however, we tend to accept the raw experience without trying to label it.
8. @$$A around the room, and label everything you see. ;ook. 3ants. :esk. :oor. :oorknob.
Aeyhole. @ight switch. @ight socket. "issues. :og. 3lant. @eaf. >ase. 4otice how you feel in
your body.
9. 4ow, using your sense of touch, go to each of the things you were looking at, and touch them.
Beel the texture of the book, the soft fabric of your pants, the cool smoothness of the desk
notice the different textures, weights and contours of these things. 7llow that experience by itself
to be enough without labeling things as book! or pants! or desk.! 4otice how you feel in
your body. %hen I do this exercise, I feel a flavor of almost childlike, exploratory curiosity R
does that match your experience?
A. 4ow here comes the Aino >ision! part. @ook again at each of these things, as if your ga(e
was reaching out and caressing those ob+ects, +ust as you would with your hand. 5ou arent
labeling the contours you see +ust simply touching them with your ga(e.
Instea. of re.ucing ob2ects in your awareness to a series of labels1 you(re acti0ely
E'<!<I'< with a 0isceral1 physical experience. It will help keep you out of your hea..
"his is 7ino -ision.
B. 4ow, imagine what it would be like to look at a woman in this way. %hen youre making eye
contact with a woman, imagine that youre reaching out with your eyes and caressing her.
Imagine that you can feel the smoothness of her cheek, the silkiness of her hair, the warmth of
her skin, and the gentleness of her being with your ga(e. &owever, dont put words to it 0like Ive
+ust done1. 7ctually feel what it would be like to extend your awareness and energy to caress her.
%hen you really start to master Aino >ision, it may actually feel as if youre waking up out of
the Matrix. %eve literally had a woman tell one of our 7M3 Crads, %ow, your ga(e feels like
warm honey is being poured through my entire body.!
E:E#6IE )hare. Humanity C9+: 5ou may be thinking to yourself &ow do I practice
#hared &umanity?! Its simpler than you think. Co anywhere where there are a lot of people, like
the mall or a Iuiet place where you can conscientiously observe other people, like the library or a
caf). #it there and people watch! for a little while. "hen pick a person who stands out to you in
some way and start to really feel! into who they are.
If you all you had to go on was +ust your sense! about this other person, how would you answer
the following Iuestions? Cive it a try. 6ven without coming up with the answers or knowing the
real truth, can you B66@ into what it might be like to be them? $nce you do it, notice if you feel
closer to them. $r do they feel like the same stranger as they did before? Khances are, if you
really give this exercise your full attention youll feel much closer to them, and if you choose to
talk to them, theyll feel comfort with you and be impacted by your 3resence and 7ppreciation.
%hat does the expression on their face tell you? :o they seem sad, happy, tired, restrained? 6tc.

Hol.ing energy back

<roup 8: )6ollapsing+ Energy pushe. forwar. R you lose connection with yourself and
attraction dies.
<roup 9: )%osturing+ Energy hel. back R you try to manage! your image, stuck in Dst
position, no #hared &umanity, Kaptive 7udience occurs, attraction dies.
<roup A: Meeting their ga5e R youre 3resent, clear and open. "ake a look at this image of
7lexis below. &ow does the Iuality of her ga(e feel to you?
E:E#6IE )%osturing an. 6ollapse+: @ook at yourself in the mirror. If you can, imagine
what it would be like to be a woman looking at you. 6xplore the Iuality of your ga(e from that
perspective. %hat do you notice? 9emember, this is very subtle work. 7re you falling forward,
leaning in, wanting to make sure a woman doesnt think or feel a certain way? If so, youre more
likely to Kollapse with women.
$r do you seem more withdrawn, pulled?back, indifferent, playing?it?cool, not too interested? If
this is the case, youre more likely to 3osture with women. 4ow, practice imagining being totally
centered and 7>7I@7;@6 for the interaction, keeping awareness in your body, allowing
yourself to be impacted without being overwhelmed. 7 lot of guys can get decent results in their
relating with women without being centered but it ends up being a lot of work. Brom a
centered place, theres very little that &7# to be done. Bor a woman, encountering a centered
man is rare since most men either collapse forward or posture back 0to some degree1.
7llow yourself to be impacted from a woman, that makes a huge difference'
.oure really nurturing! R 5oure telling her how she is. % feel really nurtured in your
/resence. 5oure sharing with her about your experience and how she impacts you.
E:E#6IE )$eep 4reathing %ractice+: Bollow along with the breathing practice that Sohn
gives 7m+ad, and notice the difference that you feel in your body. :eep breathing oxygenates
your blood, making you feel more alive, alert and 3resent.
E:E#6IE )4rief 9n. %osition %ractice+: ;ased on the two photos, if you were a woman,
how do you think you would feel! about 7m+ad before and after this simple breathing exercise?
3ractice taking 8nd 3osition! and describe out loud or on paper.
7fter having tasted that kind of depth and connection not having that is so painful and, not
wanting to sound too dramatic or too dark, I would +ust rather die.!
E:E#6IE )4eing Mo0e. an. Emotionally Impacte. 4y 3our ;ife+' Imagine that youre
walking down the street and you see :ecker on a cell phone walking your direction while
sobbing. 7t this point youve spent some time with :ecker, so based on what you know of his
3resence so far, how would you imagine this looking and feeling to you?
:o you imagine him sobbing while solid in his masculinity?
%ould he be a complete yes! to his own experience?
%ould other men feel that his 3resence was that of a pussy?
:o you think its possible for a man to be fully feeling his heart, fully feeling his emotions, and
still be standing strong? If we didnt, I doubt any of us would be involved in this work.
Konsider, for your own life, what it would be like for you to embody this strength and
vulnerability at the same time.
@ike men, its also a struggle for women to be a yes! in their lives. "he more a woman is a yes!
to her own feminine design, the more +oy and freedom she feels.
Excercise )#eflection+' "his exercise is a complement to the curiosity process. It simply
involves reflecting,! or speaking back, to her what you +ust learned about her.
My first impression of you wasD *hen I felt you the mostD *hat I really got about youD
#ome guys will do this exercise verbatim! at the end of a date and create an ama(ing connection
from it. "hats fine, and feel free to use it if you like. "o be clear, however, were not teaching
you a techniIue! as much as we are a particular Iuality of being! that can have a ma+or impact
on your relating with women.
Excercise )6hoosing game+' 5ou can play games with her based on giving her two different
options to choose from. "he more you get 3resent and drop into 7ppreciation with her, the more
creative and fun your Iuestions will be.
Moonlight or starlight?
Kats or dogs?
Mountains or deserts?
#and or snow?
Co really slow. ;reathe, and take your time. "his is an opportunity to really take her in. If you
rush this process youre completely missing the point of it. Its not even really about the words as
much as it is the connection. 5oull start to learn all kinds of things about her based on her
responses. 3ou(ll also learn a lot about her base. on the =uality of her response.
&aving ama(ing women in your life is not a direct result of this work. It is the by/pro.uct of this
work. %hat youre learning here is a higher level of living your life and women are drawn to
you as a result of the extraordinary life youre learning to create.
7ppreciation applies to far more than +ust women ? it determines the Iuality of your life. Its
looking at the world with the eyes of a child, fascinated, 3resent and curious 0thats a treeG1.
7mi' 7nd I want a man to feel my first kiss with him the way you +ust felt that tree. I dont want
it to feel rushed, I dont want it to feel like there wasnt attention because I was an ob+ect. I want
to feel exactly like you +ust described that.!
*e struggle with this1 we notice a woman an. e0en as we(re checking out what we really
like1 what we think is hot1 we also ha0e an imme.iate focus on what is not hotD I say that
you(re suffering in those moments. I say that youre totally undercutting whats possible with
women and that youre miserable in those moments. $ne of the most rewarding practices I know
of, to take your relating with women to an entirely new level, from the place of a deep sense of
inspiration and clarity about what you want and where youre headed, without apologi(ing for
it =
Integrity
Integrity' Adherence to a code of values; incorruptibility; you cant be swayed from what you
stand for.
%hen you(re less attache. to the outcome of an interaction and more connecte. to your own
personal truth you start to have access to a whole new way of being that women find innately
attractive.
Excercise )what .o you want+' Make a list of all things you want in your relationships with
woman.
%hen you are in alignment with your values, it will show up in your interactions with women,
because you will naturally talk about what you K796 about, rather than +ust ;.#.ing or
pretending to be interested in the conversation. he May 4e !ngry *ith 3ou1 4ut !ctually
#espect 3ou M&#EE #he may not like that shes not getting what she wants, but it has far more
value to her that she trusts you to make a powerful choice in alignment with your truth.
Excercise )"ruly important+' "ake a moment to reflect deeply on whats truly important to you.
%hat are you passionate about? %hat do you really care about? %ould you make a significant
sacrifice in some way for this particular thing? Is there something you would you be willing to
die for?
$wning his truth in =Ice TueenL"horn @ady! experience
D D1 He was being %resent to the sensations in his own body and what he felt inside was
8 B679.
U 81 7s he 6M;97K6: that fear, welcomed it, and actually even chose to 64S$5 it, he
D was being a 3es1 !ppreciating his own sensations.
N N1 &e was willing to vulnerably #&796 his authentic experience with her 0Integrity1.
O O1 He was being a 3es or !ppreciating &69, without +udging or dismissing her as a
P bitchy ice Iueen.!
V P1 He wasn(t attache. to her response as he shared his experience )Integrity+.
W V1 7nd he was able to do all of this in a playful, uplifting way.
Integrity is about taking responsibility for your own experience 0your sense of internal okayness
is not swayed by her response1. 5ou need to be established long before you ever set foot into that
social environment. :ont +udge, +ust share your experience, like i felt really connected, etc.
exual power
N different kind of things where we shut down our sexuality, and how to resolve them'
I. %hysical
6hi packing excercise' patting yourself everywhere, on your belly with airbreathing techniIue,
with a deep breath bring awareness to your body, to your spine 0be in the moment, present1
II. Emotional
a+ !nger' dont supress your anger as man 0toward woman1, example' resenting
woman have power over you 0specially when you dont have a clue how it works1,
bring it up, and be honest with yourself, dont harbor anger, or resentment
b+ hame' sometimes unconscious, imagine how your would you react if someone
exposed you in public 0cover up? Kontracted? $r unapologetic?1, or exposed
through masturbating, first step overcoming it is awareness of the problem,
imprint of past experiences of shameLwrongness of expressing sexuality, get it
handled, so you dont have emotional charge around it, until that they own youG
6xercise' talk open about itG
c+ My .esires are too kinky for most of woman' 8W. percn)l hagytam abba