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My Testimony to the Truth

Varkey M John
2012B3A3467G








ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
I would like to thank God for His grace given to me in writing
this paper. Also I would like to thank my Sir, Mr. Amitendu, who
has given me the opportunity to write about the Truth.


















This term paper on Creative Nonfiction is written in partial
fulfillment of the requirements of the course Creative Writing
(GS F241)










My testimony to the Truth
April 8, 2014.
To an old friend,
I am writing this letter to bear witness to my Lord and Saviour Jesus. Its been a
while since we have last seen each other. I have changed a lot since then. Ive
been called by God for His purpose.
It was on the 2
nd
of July last year that He called me. It was truly profound. Like all
born again believers, I too was led by God to Him by His Majestic Power and Will.
For over 19 years I did not know God. I have read the scriptures and known all the
laws and commands. Ive even read about Jesus but I have never understood nor
sought to understand the deep mystery of the cross. On that day even when I did
not seek God and was going completely against His Will, it pleased the Father that
I be reconciled to Himself through His Son, Jesus.
After I got to college, life changed a lot. College was a new way of life entirely.
There was a lot of freedom with no parents or teachers controlling you or telling
you what to do. I felt free and with all that my college had to offer, it was all that
you would ever dream of.
I fell right into it all. I had everything anyone would ever want. I had all the
money, the porn, the alcohol. I could party and drink and do whatever I felt like
doing all day, every day. Even the grades werent a big deal. I got a decent 7 by
the end of first year. And even with all this and more I had NOTHING!
I used to be afraid of everything. Even while talking with somebody my heart used
to race high. I used to be jealous of others for the things they had and I used to
seek glory from everyone a lot. I never truly had any peace. I was just doing this
and that and trying to find some purpose in it all.
My heart was absolutely empty. All the pleasures of this world could not satisfy
my greed or my thirst or my hunger. There was something missing. It was just all
vanity. Most days Id go to the bathroom and just think What am I doing with my
life? for just a 5 second gap. The thought would just fly away and Id go right back
into all that was not. All was vanity. I realized more and more every day. Nothing
made sense anymore. All that I studied made no sense. All that I enjoyed made no
sense. All that I drank, all that I ate, everything, absolutely everything was vanity,
absolute vanity. But I just lived on. I knew something was missing; still it somehow
did not matter. It was probably because everyone else felt the same and no one
seemed to matter much about the total meaninglessness.
Im writing you all this because I know you also are doing all the same things I
have been doing for nearly a year. I know of the darkness in your life, how you are
blind to everything and want something out of it all but somehow you are just not
able to grab it-like chasing the wind. I know how you try to seek glory from
everyone else in all that you do, in all the good things as well as the bad things
that you do. I know how you fear a lot, how you fear others around you, even
your friends, mostly because of things that you do. I know how you try to please
everyone else and no matter how hard you try not everyone gets pleased, and
somehow or the other you find yourself in envy and strife. I know how you use all
abusive and bad words, just so that people may see that you know these words
and that you may look cool in front of them. I know how you try to do all the
things that others do so that you also may find some joy in you, yet you dont feel
a thing and you get more sad and lonely. Also, I know how you laugh and smile so
hard to try to get some joy in your life and yet I know how deep the agony and
the pain of the imperfection and incompletion in your soul is. You always seek for
something. You dont know what it is you are seeking. You cant find it. I know its
crushing you. Im writing all this to you so that you may receive the perfection of
it all in my Lord Jesus.
I can tell you more of the empty life Ive felt, and probably you also are going
through. I am planning to keep this letter not too long.
Either way last year He called me. I wont go into the details of how He called
me but just know that He has called me, even though you may not believe me. I
was sinning the worst in those days and out of the filth that I was, He took me and
cleaned me. The conversion was instantaneous. Just one day and my whole life
changed for the better. That day He told me to repent and turn to Him in the
name of our loving Lord and Saviour Jesus. And it was the best experience that
has ever happened to me.
Its been nearly 9 months since I have been born again. I tell u with all my heart
that one day spent with Him was better than all the 19 years (nearly) without
Him. It was profound after that. Ive never felt such perfect peace, joy, love and
the immense completion and wholeness in all the years I spent without Him. Im
telling you... God is real. Jesus is real. He is more real than all of us. Its complete
absolute reality. I can prove by all the messianic prophecies, the bible code
findings and many NDEs, visions and dreams which all prove beyond doubt of His
reality. But beyond all that Im writing to you in this letter to testify personally
that I myself have seen, felt and tasted of His immense perfection and beauty.
His glory is beyond words. No amount of words in any systematic or algorithmic
order can ever be uttered by any man to describe even one millionth of His
absolute perfection. A million years spent on earth to just see one fraction of one
molecule of His toenail for one nanosecond would be infinitely worth everything!
After the conversion to the Truth, all my desires were immediately gone, all my
desires for porn, alcohol, girls, everything. It was completely gone. Every day I
used to wake up and the first image that came into my mind was the Him dying
for me on the cross. Every day all that was in my mind was Him. All that I could
think of was Him. And Id wonder about His infinite love for me on the cross all
day and night. It was just incomprehensible. No one could ever fathom the length
and depth and width and breadth of His infinite love.
There are preachers who die every day for His names sake. Ive never wondered
why or how they do it. It is only when you feel the gospel truly can you even come
close to understand why people die for the Lord. It doesnt have meaning to it
unless you seek God and He shows it to you and He will show it to you if you seek
Him.
Those days I used to cry like a baby out loud in my room. I didnt know fully why I
was crying and I could never get myself to stop from crying. I used to feel hot and
sweating every time I used to pray. Ive only heard of people crying in prayer
services. Only when you actually feel the Lord do you understand why they cry
like that. Some say its all an act. You can believe what you want but I tell you
from the depths of my heart all this is real and this is the absolute Truth in all the
worlds.
The days that followed Ive felt the most perfect peace. Nothing mattered to me
no more. Whatever anyone said, good or bad, didnt matter because it was only
for the Glory of God that I was living. Its His pleasure that was and is important.
All my fear inside me was just drained away. Only the fear of God remained.
Rarely have I felt my heart beat faster in fear of anything after that. The peace of
God completely filled me and perfected me.
Then there was the joy, the most absolute perfect divine joy. True joy is when you
can actually praise and glorify God. After my accounts exam in 2-1, I repented I
didnt study fully and Im not sure why but God allowed me to feel a joy that was
so profound and so beyond me that I jumped around praising and glorifying His
High Glory. In all my 19 years, even after all the pleasures Ive felt in this world,
even after partying and going to places and eating the finest food and drinking
and partaking in almost all the pleasures of this world, Im telling you Ive not
once felt such joy as much Ive felt that day. I havent felt joy to that degree again
either. It was just perfect. The best thing to it is that it was absolutely, completely
right. There was nothing wrong in feeling that much joy! It was like I was drunk in
Gods love.
Then love. All my envy and jealousy and hatred went away and I could finally love
everyone. The perfect freedom you can get is in Christ, and its more in Christ
when you truly learn how to love unconditionally.
Completion comes next. I felt the most amazing perfection and satisfaction in my
soul. There was nothing missing after that. I had found the purpose in life. God
showed it to me. I was never again lonely in life because God is always with me.
The emptiness I had always had was completely gone. Jesus filled the gap and I
felt whole.
All makes sense after you turn to Christ. All the purpose of man in this world is to
Glorify God. God made man to glorify Himself. He made them simple but we
make ourselves complicated. All that you study is to glorify God. All that you eat is
to glorify God. All that you say or do no matter what it is should be to glorify God
through His Son, Jesus. This is the absolute Truth and the purpose of life and you
will feel all the completion, peace, love, joy and so much more if you give away
your life to do the will of God, through faith in Jesus Christ.
I have had the privilege of suffering for Christ. He has rebuked me and humbled
me a lot. Even the sufferings you endure are all wonderful and you rejoice in it
because it gives glory to God. It is truly a remarkable life to live. Ive heard stories
of martyrs for Christ, being burnt alive upside down on the cross and being ripped
apart by lions and others beings stoned for His Names sake. The most wondrous
thing is that even while they were being killed they sang hymns of joy and praise
for the glory of the Lord. Its just profound how He can give you such peace and
grace, that even while suffering and not you rejoice in the Lord.
All these wonderful gifts, in all their perfection, can never be attained alone. You
have to rely on the One and True God to guide you. He is the only Way to Life, no
matter what anyone says or thinks.
My letter is getting a bit long. I think I would end it here. Again, this letter was
written as a testimony to the Truth. You probably will despise it and not believe a
word I said, but let those who have ears let them hear. Repent of your sins now
and turn to Christ now before its too late. You will die one day and I am bearing
witness to the Truth that Christ is the ONLY WAY into the kingdom. Turn from
your sins, repent and turn to Him NOW!
Regards,
Varkey
(2100 words)


Reference:
1. John 14:6 Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to
the Father except through me.
This verse has been used in the line, He is the only Way to Life, no matter what anyone
says or thinks. and in the line, You will die one day and I am bearing witness to the
Truth that Christ is the ONLY WAY into the kingdom. It may have also been used as a
reference in other lines where the term Truth has been used.
2. Matthew 11:15 Whoever has ears, let them hear.
This verse has been used in the line, You probably will despise it and not believe a
word I said, but let those who have ears let them hear.
3. Ecclesiastes 7:29 This only have I found: God made mankind upright, but men have
gone in search of many schemes."
This verse has been used in the line, He made them simple but we make ourselves
complicated.
4. Mark 1:15 "The time has come," he said. "The kingdom of God has come near. Repent
and believe the good news!"
This verse is used in the lines, That day He told me to repent and turn to Him in the
name of our loving Lord and Saviour Jesus., Repent of your sins now and turn to Christ
now before its too late., Turn from your sins, repent and turn to Him NOW! and other
places where repentance is talked about.
5. John 3:3 Jesus replied, "Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless
they are born again."
This verse is used as reference to the term born-again which is used in the paper.
6. Ecclesiastes 1:2 Vanity
[a]
of vanities, says the Preacher; Vanity of vanities,
all is vanity.
This verse has been used in the lines, It was just all vanity., All was vanity. and other
places where vanity is described.
7. Ephesians 3:18 may have power, together with all the Lord's holy people, to grasp how
wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,
This verse has been used in the line, No one could ever fathom the length and depth
and width and breadth of His infinite love.
8. Acts 5:41 The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted
worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.
This verse has been used as a reference to the idea portrayed in the line, I have had
the privilege of suffering for Christ.
9. Ecclesiastes 1:14 I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are
meaningless, a chasing after the wind.
The phrase, chasing the wind has been used in the line, I know of the darkness in your
life, how you are blind to everything and want something out of it all but somehow you
are just not able to grab it-like chasing the wind.
10. Colossians 1:20 and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth
or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.
The idea of reconciliation was used in the line, On that day even when I did not seek
God and was going completely against His Will, it pleased the Father that I be reconciled
to Himself through His Son, Jesus.

All the verses used in reference are from NIV translation of the living Bible.

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