Fangirls Anatomy

K-pop-loaded iPodcheck! Camerascheck! Albumscheck! Tees, pins, light sticks,

and other fan-phernaliacheck, check, check, check! Fangirl makeovercheck! Fangirl scream
check! Fansignscheck! Fan club official membershipcheck! verall obsession to !"#$ee
super check!
%ell, #&ve never been on a concert before but ever' time #&m on ()T and it passes b' the
*+ig ,ome-, images of me holding pearl blue light stick .hile /umping to the beat of Amigo
flash in m' mind and like .hat !pongebob al.a's sa' before going to Krusty Krab, #&m read'!
01222 times until he arrives at Krabs place34
(' fangirl s'ndrome started .ith Replay b' SHINee4 After a .eek of non-stop !"#$ee
giddiness, # kne. # .as hooked5on the cra6' l'rics # can&t even understand 0.ell at least no. #
can relate a bit4 Thanks to online 7nglish translations3, the irresistible se8iness slash cuteness of
their lead vocals 0se8iness is the .ord4 9ou don&t belong in the K-pop industr' if 'ou&re not
se8'3 and the feel-good beats4 #t .as onl' a matter of time before # found m'self s.ooning over
K-pop and in the instant addictive high that each song brought4
My Humble Beginnings
%hen # first entered this kind of realm, # .as totall' lost4 #t .as like # .as stuck in a ma6e
and couldn&t find m' .a' out4 +ecause # can&t t.ig their o.n language and e8pressions, # found
m'self scrunching m' e'ebro.s ever' time # tr' to sociali6e .ith :the communit'&4 The' have
their o.n language and each fanclub has their bunch of vocabularies, too4 The most commonl'
used mumbo /umbos a fangirl should master are selca0self-cam3, CF0commercial film3,
(;0(usic videos3, neti6en 0online fangirls<online K-pop critics3, goodb'e stage 0it is a si8-
month break of a group for the preparation of the ne8t album concept3, comeback stage 0after si8
months of taking a break, K-pop group goes back to perform on stage3, fanfics 0stories using the
K-pop idols as main characters34 +ut of course m' favorite part is # learned basic Korean! =ike
oppa 0meaning older bro, the one talking is a girl3 and hyung 0meaning older brother if the one
talking is a bo'3, saranghae 0# love 'ou3, maknae 0'oungest3, sunbae 0mentor3, dongsaeng
0'ounger sibling34 %ell, it .ill take me t.o full pages of all the /argons # have learned4 After a
month of severe indulgence, # have learned the ropes and finall', # called m'self an official
fangirl4 ,uring m' second month of fangirling, # can&t start m' da' right .ithout having m'
favorite part of m' favorite K-pop vibe as m' morning alarm and # can&t start m' assignments
.ithout reading a bunch of ne.s and picture updates from soompi4com and allkpop4com4
,a's, months, and 'ears .ent on and m' obsession gre. deeper and deeper4 # feel m'
nerves d'ing if # missed a da' of fangirling4 For three 'ears, # reali6ed that 'ou can&t be a true
blue fangirl if 'ou sta' sane ever' time 'ou .atch them smirk4 9ou don&t call 'ourself a fangirl if
'our earlobes can&t feel eargasm 0sorr' for the .ord but that&s the .a' .e sa' it3 each time the'
sing onstage and don&t dare label 'ourself as a fangirl if 'ou don&t stalk ever' single fact about
'our bias 0'es folks, 'ou heard me right4 %7 !TA=K34
To complete the package, fangirls read heaps of fan-fictions and s>uealing because of the
gidd' moments of their bias and their fictional partners 0to tell 'ou the stupid truth, # applied so
man' times for the main fictional character4 h, forgive me4 7ven /ust in stories # .ant to kiss
?ongh'un34 #n fact, # have improved m' talent in .riting .hen # started .riting fan fictions4
Though m' first .orks sucks, at least it .as .idel' read all over Asia @blushing@ and # made
some people cr' because of m' tragic masterpieces and of course, # have gained friends across
the globe! # have three from !ingapore, t.o from (ala'sia, one from California, si8 from
#ndonesia, and t.o from France4 Though .e are from different races, .e understand each other4
Fangirl Glitches
Though # feel so fl' ever' time # am fangirling, # admit that there are some complications
0some are minors but some are big34 First, being a fangirl involves a lot of mone' 0.hen # sa' a
lot, it&s a thick bunch of mone'34 %atching music videos ever' single moment, memori6ing alien
l'rics and being up-to-date is not enough4 #t is m' frustration4 (' not-so-high financial status
can&t feed m'self .ith this kind of satisfaction4 %hile most of the fangirls can grab ever' ne.
album copies, official calendars, official shirts, official pins and light sticks and can travel
.herever /ust to follo. their beloved&s concert, #&m /ust stealing some official photos in the
internet and print it as if # have the official calendar4 # onl' do.nload music videos and mpAs
from 4shared as if # have an official album4 # do.nload official shirt template and go to the
nearest and cheapest shirt printing services as if # reall' bought the official one 0poor me34
+elieve me, it&s hard to follo. the rich fangirls 0of course, 'ou can&t stop 'ourself being /ealous34
# even have to lie to m' dad .henever # bu' merchs 0merchandise3 and sa' it&s /ust a gift from a
friend4 The hardest part of m' fangirl life is that m' parents don&t support me 0the' think it&s /ust
a stupid addiction4 Perhaps the' don&t understand the concept because the'&re >uite old
@snickers@34 # can still vividl' remember the da' # had to thro. tantrums the moment # kne. that
#&m 1BA
rd
on the ticket raffle for the F)77 cultural partnership performance of !"#$ee in CCP4
%h' did # gro. insaneC The' onl' gave free tickets from first to the 1B2
th
! # had to cr' blood in
front of m' dad 0as if #&m a lead star in a hardcore Filipino drama3 /ust for him to let me attend4 #
can&t .atch inside the hall but at least # can see the arrival and departure of !"#$ee4 "o.ever,
since #&m a minor that time and he .ill not give me mone', # failed4 !o as a result, # cut seven
inches of m' hair /ust to e8press m' sorro. 09es, # felt sorro.34 #&m such a drama >ueen4
To add more findings, .e fangirls are detached to realit'4 $ot all people around us
understand us so, .e tend to disconnect 0that&s .h' .e have online communities34 %e share
closel' related vie.s and illusions4 %e are good da'dreamers 0especiall' night dreaming34 %e
imagine life is a fair'-tale and a photocop' of those fanfics .e read4 %e planted in our brains
that .e can find perfect people like those in K-pop 0and the .orst thing is some of us undergo
surgeries /ust to be a perfect carbon cop', reall'34 %e think of the almost impossible things and
do ever'thing /ust to make it happen4 Foolish as 'ou ma' see it but don&t .orr' 'ou&re not
mistaken4 !ome folks on the .a' hearing m' K-pop addiction raise their e'ebro.s and consider
a tanned Filipino girl chanting Korean spell is bi6arre4 h please, this is D21D .e are living right
no. and listening to K-pop is the result of globali6ation4 +ut as a rule in our .orld, bra.ling is a
big no so # sta' calm ever' time someone sa's straight to m' face that m' music sucks4
Whatever happens Ill stay
Fangirling took m' hand and .e ran more than a mile to escape from the soil of chaos4
The pressure of living in realit' .here ever'thing is tangled, imperfect and not going .ith 'our
plan is soothed4 These are the reasons that for three 'ears, # never thought of den'ing this kind of
life4 # .ant to sta' sane after the .hole da'&s .ork b' /ust devoting t.o hours of spaing4 #t
.ipes the tears .henever (r4 Algebra gave me an F4 #t taught me ho. to sta' cool .henever #&m
in a stick' situation b' /ust plugging m' earphones on and hit the pla' button4 #t sits .ith me
.hen all m' friends had gone home4 #t made me feel the giddiness #&ve never felt .ith a real
person4 #t holds the 'outh inside me because it can make me feel that after all the trials and
obstacles # pass through, #&m still 'oung4 And the most important thing, it made me feel ho. it is
like to be understood4
%e need to get out of sanit' because sometimes once .e go .ild and free, .e get to find
ourselves4 %e must seek for venues .here .e can e8plode the colors though .e have to look
cra6' and all4 =ike .hat # al.a's tell m' friends, normal is boring and be'ond normal is
e8citing4 Though .e are living in a same old planet, there are different .orlds formed b' people
.ho share same creations and dreams and for that, #&ve appreciated the differences of people&s
tastes and ideas4 $o matter ho. .eird a person does, as long as their >uirkiness makes them a
better person, the' shouldn&t be /udged4
Sweet reams! Fangirl
%hen the clock hits eleven #&ll shut m' e'es off to end another da' and fall into a deep
slumber4 There, # .ill not meet (r4 Algebra4 # .ill not see the face of the gu' .ho broke m'
heart last .eek and # .ill never pass through the gates of =a !alle4 # .ill /ust continue running
through the stairs of ()T station .ith m' bag full of fan- because time #&m not /ust passing b'
the *+ig dome- 0/ust don&t rock m' bed, oka'C34