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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

"Domestic violence, or domestic abuse is defined as a pattern of beaviour,


caracterised b! te e"ercise of control b! one person over anoter, #itin te conte"t of
an intimate or famil! relationsip"$Islin%ton&' It can be manifested in various #a!s,
includin% p!sicall!, se"uall!, verball! and ps!colo%icall!' Domestic violence affects all
people, re%ardless of social class, %ender, se"ualit!, a%e, etnicit! or educational
bac(%round' )o#ever, domestic abuse tends to affect more #omen tan men, especiall!
in *aamian societ!, as it is mainl! a %ender+based crime'
"Most commonl! domestic violence is a combination of t!pes of abuse' It tends
to be on%oin%, repeated and li(el! to escalate in severit!$ Diversit! and Domestic ,buse
Support Services&' ,ccordin% to an article in te Tribune entitled, "-olice ,dvice.
Domestic Violence ,nd Suicide", tree out of five persons are victimi/ed b! domestic
violence at some point in teir lives but because of pride and embarrassment, onl! one in
five victims #it p!sical in0uries see( medical treatment, and onl! about 123 of te
Domestic Violence incidents are reported to police'
4ro#in% up, man! of our !oun% men are tau%t b! teir faters, teacers, and
oter male role models tat te! are to be in control of teir sisters, #ives and
%irlfriends'Man! tin( tat it is #itin teir ri%t to abuse or mistreat teir #ives or
partners' It is a si%n of control' ",buse is about po#er and control, not about %ender
roles, and it does not ave to be p!sical to be abuse'$ Diversit! and Domestic ,buse
Support Services&'" Man! people tin( tat abuse is 0ust p!sical, but tere are man!
#a!s !ou can do abuse someone #itout even liftin% a fin%er'5Domestic violence is
al#a!s can%in%' T#ent! !ears a%o a lot of it #as 0ust te fi%tin% and tin%s li(e tat'
No#ada!s !ou are seein% domestic violence #it social media and it as complicated it
to te point #ere !ou cannot control it'"$4ibson 6278&'
-)9SIC,L ,*:SE
Tis is te (ind of abuse tat is most associated #it domestic violence in te
media' -!sical abuse ma! involve puncin%, slappin%, %rabbin%, (ic(in% or ittin% #it
ands or oter ob0ects' Tis t!pe of abuse is te one tat leaves te most p!sical
evidence, terefore it is te easiest to prove' ;omen #o are p!sicall! abused b! teir
romantic or marital partners can suffer bro(en bones, bruises, scars, cuts and even deat' '
Te de%ree of dam%e inflicted upon te person depends on te amount of force used,
#ere te force is applied and for o# lon% it is applied' Tis t!pe of abuse tends to
escalate in violence as time passes' ;at started as a seemin%l! innocent pus #en
ar%uin% can end #it an individual bein% violentl! beaten ever! da!' "Even tou% it is
sad but true, appro"imatel! all perpetrators of Domestic Violence sa! tat te! #ill stop,
but ardl! ever do' Te violence usuall! %ets #orse'"$-inder 6278&'
Man! *aamian #omen %re# up in enviornments #ere te! sa# teir moters
or %randmoters bein% p!sicall! abused b! teir usbands' )ence, te! see it as
sometin% normal, especiall! if te! ave not e"perienced or been educated oter#ise' In
teir e!es, if te #oman did not do an!tin% #ron%, er bo!friend or usband #ould not
ave ad to p!sicall! discipline er' ;en teir o#n bo!friends or usbands it tem
te! tin( tat te! are te problem and not im'
VE<*,L ,*:SE
Tis t!pe of abuse is more sociall! acceptable in *aamian societ!' It is ealt!
for couples to ar%ue no# and a%ain,o#ever #en tis appens on a re%ular basis and
#it increasin% verocit! it becomes verbal abuse' Man! couples re%ularl! curse, !ell at
and insult one anoter on an almost dail! basis' In man! reltionsips it is incorrectl! seen
as te normal tin% to do and is not seen as abuse' It includes but is not limited to !ellin%,
cursin%, screamin% and insultin%' Verbal abuse can destro! a #oman=s self+#ort, self
esteem, confidence and peace of mind, especiall! #en comin% from someone #o te!
love' It can >uic(l! escalate into p!sical abuse, as most disa%reements in relationsips
be%in #it #ords tat trnasform into actions'"Te verbal attac(s are meant to control te
victim, in an effort of strippin% tem of teir self+esteem, self+confidence, and self+love'
Te perpetrator often #ants teir victim to believe tat it is teir fault for te violence and
te verbal abuse'"$-inder, 6278&'
-S9C)OLO4IC,L ,*:SE
-s!colo%ical abuse,also referred to as emotional or mental abuse, is #en a
person is e"posed to ne%ative beavior from anoter person #it te intent of causin%
tem ps!colo%ical trauma' In a relationsip, a man mi%t manipulate a #oman=s
emotions and cause depression, an"iet! and stress' )e ma! do tis b! pla!in%
mind%ames, e"ercisin% complete control over er life' ?or e"ample, b! decidin% #ere
se %oes, #o se tal(s to and #at se eats' ,lso, te abuser ma! constantl! treaten to
leave te relationsip or arm te individual, er cildren or famil! if se decides to
leave im' :suall! ps!colo%ical abuse is incorporated #it verbal or p!sical abuse'
Te form of abuse is ver! dama%in% to a #oman=s ps!ce' ,s te dam%e is not
visible, se ma! ta(e a lon%er time to come to %rips #it te fact tat te relationsip is
affectin% er mood, personalit! and peace of mind' "Most persons #o are victimi/ed b!
tese einous crimes feel trapped and confused' Te abuser not onl! p!sicall! attac(s
tem, but te! also ps!colo%icall! attac( and manipulate teir victims'"$-inder, 6278&'
, #oman ma! tr! to can%e er lifest!le or #o se associates #it to please er partner
#ic ma! result in er becomin% sociall! isolated from peers, fello# emplo!ees and
famil! members' Se becomes totall! submissive to is #ill in order to please im' Tis
usuall! comes from te desperation or fear of bein% alone' ", bad man is better tan no
man", is te motto tat man! clin% to'
SE@:,L ,*:SE
,ltou%, it is not as openl! discussed as te previous tree, se"ual abuse does
occur in relationsips of all forms' Man! *aamian #omen live #it false assumption
tat because te! are in a relationsip te! are obli%ated to e"can%e se"ual favors or
en%ae in se"ual intercourse #it teir partner' Ever!one as te ri%t te sa! no,
re%ardless of if te! are in a relationsip #it or even married to a man' ,lso, date rape
as been receivin% >uite alot of attention in bot ;orld and *aamian publicit!'
,ccordin% to te Ne# O"ford ,merican Dictionar!, date rape is rape committed b! te
victim=s escort' Tis escort does not ave to be in a relationsip #it te person, but can
also be someone se as been datin% for a #ile, a person se as 0ust met or even a male
friend'
Man! *aamian males assume tat te main purpose of ma(in% a #oman is
%irlfriend or #ife is to obtain se" #itout >uestion' ;en se refuses or does not feel li(e
en%a%in% in se"ual intercourse e ma! tr! to force imself upon er, #ic is rape' Some
men do not see it as rape, but simpl! as tem ta(in% from te female #at se sould
ave %iven tem submissivel! and #itout >uestion' Tis is not onl! a dan%erous #a! of
tin(in%, but is e"tremel! dama%in% to te p!sical and mental #ell+bein% of te female'
Tis problem is not 0ust in adult relationsip, but in tose of teena%ers and adolescents as
#ell' )oll! Tuc(er in an intervei# #it te Tribune ne#spaper said tat ",bout one in
four adolescents report verbal, p!sical, emotional or se"ual abuse from a datin% partner
amon% 77+7A !ear olds in relationsipsB te! sa! te! (no# friends #o ave been
verball! abused b! a bo!friend or %irlfriend'C

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