Chemicals of Love

Love is fascinating and complex.

Romantic love, in particular, seems to
be a beautiful mystery we find hard to
explain.
Although poets and songwriters can
put many of our romantic thoughts and
feelings into words, love is so
inexplicable we need the help of
science to explain it. After all,
psychologists have a lot to say about
how and why people fall in love.
Love is a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes that ranges from interpersonal
affection to pleasure. It can refer to an emotion of a strong attraction and personal attachment.
Psychologists have shown it takes between 90 seconds and 4 minutes to decide if you fancy
someone. Research has shown that 55% is through body language, 38% is the tone and speed of
their voice and only 7% is through what they say.
By the Evolutionary psychology, love has been seen as a mechanism to promote mutual parental
support of children for an extended time period.
Studies in neuroscience have involved chemicals that are present in the brain and might be
involved when people experience love. These chemicals include: nerve growth factor, testosterone,
estrogen,

dopamine,

norepinephrine,

serotonin,

oxytocin,

and vasopressin.

Dopamine,

norepinephrine, and serotonin are more commonly found during the attraction phase of a
relationship. Oxytocin and vasopressin seemed to be more closely linked to long term bonding and
relationships characterized by strong attachments.

The 3 stages of love

According to the triangular theory of love developed by psychologist Robert Sternberg, the three
components of love are intimacy, passion, and commitment. Intimacy encompasses feelings of

attachment, closeness, connectedness, and bondedness. Passion encompasses drives connected to

both limerance and sexual attraction. Commitment encompasses, in the short term, the decision to
remain with another, and in the long term, the shared achievements and plans made with that other
person.
Stage 1: Lust
This is the first stage of love and is driven by the sex hormones testosterone and estrogen in
both men and women.
In his book, The Brain in Love: 12 Lessons to Enhance Your Love Life, Dr. Daniel G. Amen
says that romantic love and infatuation are not so much of an emotion as they are motivational
drives that are part of the brain's reward system.
Stage 2: Attraction
Adrenaline
The initial stages of falling for someone activates your stress response, increasing your blood
levels of adrenalin and cortisol. This has the effect that when you unexpectedly bump into your new
love, you start to sweat, your heart races and your mouth goes dry.
Dopamine
Dopamine is a neurochemical that appears to be associated with mate selection. This chemical
stimulates desire and reward by triggering an intense rush of pleasure. It has the same effect on the
brain as taking cocaine.
Serotonin
Chemically, the serotonin effects of being infatuated have a similar chemical appearance
to obsessive-compulsive disorder, which could explain why people experiencing infatuation cannot
think of anyone else.
Nerve growth factor
In 2005, Italian scientists at Pavia University found that a protein molecule known as the nerve
growth factor (NGF) has high levels when people first fall in love, but these return to previous
levels after one year.

Stage 3: Attachment
Attachment is the bond that keeps couples together for long period of time. Scientists think there
might be two major hormones involved in this feeling of attachment: oxytocin and vasopressin.
Oxytocin
Dopamine triggers the release of oxytocin, which is sometimes called the 'cuddle hormone'. In
both genders, oxytocin is released during touching. In women, oxytocin is released during labor and
breast feeding.
Vasopressin
Vasopressin is another important hormone in the long-term commitment stage. It is also called
anti-diuretic hormone and it works with your kidneys to control thirst.
There ar also other chemicals such as endorphins and cortisol which are involved when people
experience love.
Endorphins
Your brain acquires a tolerance to the love stimulants and starts to release endorphins.
Endorphins are associated with feelings of attachment and comfort. They calm anxiety, relieve pain
and reduce stress.
Cortisol
Studies show that a person who have recently fallen in love show higher levels of cortisol. NGF
tends to activate the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis, which can increase cortisol, so it is
believed that the cortisol increase may be a product of NGF increase when falling in love.
Understanding the psychology behind falling in love can also help therapists treat people dealing
with heartbreak.
When a therapist understands the meaning that romantic love has in ones life and the traumatic
effects of the abrupt and sometimes unexpected end of a relationship, they can address their clients
ability to move on and strengthen their resiliency.