Chapter 1. Tell a dramatic story through humour.

The Wisps summoned all of their energy to try to resuscitate God. Thinking
only of the bar they left behind, the Wisps flew in patterns around God, and
sang their greatest devotional tunes. "Yes, Jebus loves us. Yes, Jebus loves
us," they sang, and it was good.
Crack! A bolt of lightning tore through the room, which happened to be a
manger, and Jebus lay in the center of the hay, silently.
"Hey look, it's Jebus. Guardian of the Galaxy. King of Kings. Ya know, the
savior? The messiah? God?"
"That's not God. Hey, how is God?" a Will O' Wisp asked. "He was sick, the
last time I heard."
"He transitioned to a nether plane. He's on Earth, now. In a manger,
somewhere. Probably not even crying about it."
The Wisp looked at his friends, the other Wisps, and lost his breath. They
looked like two Wise men. He looked at himself. He, himself, was human.
"Where and when are we?" the Wisp asked.
"We're witnessing the birth of Jebus," the other Wisps answered.
"May we pray we don't see television invented for at least another two
thousand years."
"Indeed. Then we couldn't watch:"
Planet Sprok
"without the humans noticing!" Tune in next time

Chapter 2. Humans are originally from Mars, but after using up

all its resources and destroying the atmosphere, scientists
launched a vessel containing basic genetic material to start a
new world into space. This vessel was the asteroid that killed
the dinosaurs.
"That sounds like an excellent idea," said the gang-leader of a rowdy band of
criminals. They launched their enormous DNA missile promptly. By the time it
would make it to Earth, it would hit the time-frame they were aiming for.
"Exactly as planned," said the criminal mastermind of Mars. By populating
Earth with human somes 6 million years ago, they'll have a great farm in the
present.

The fees for killing the dinosaurs would go to the owners of the weapon, a k a
God. It was a Genesis device he carried with him from far off in the Milky Way
to start life in the Solar System.
"Humans on Earth will surely foil God's plans!" said all the Martians. But God
had other plans.
There was a long path of footprints in the sand. You, my friend: you were
walking with God.
"God," you said. "If humans were brought to Earth from a nuclear missile sent
by martian criminals in the future, why would I not learn all of that until
visiting /r/writingprompts?"
"Because you weren't a real science fiction writer, son," God said. "They've
known all this stuff for a generation. But yes, it was my plan for humans to
populate Earth. I am cleverer than that, I say!"
"Then what was your mistake?" you asked.
"Letting my Will O' Wisp planet Sprok die."
"I'm sorry, you let a planet die?" you asked.
"Yes," God said. "It froze over when it became Hell. There are a bunch of
Marines, there. They go there to regroup when they die."
"What kind of God are you?" you asked, and ran off the beach into the sea,
lucid dreaming your way back to Neptune. God had sunk to capturing Wisps
to tell his story, it seemed.
Tune in next time on
Planet Sprok

Chapter 3. World's most successful assasin is a blind man, tell

me his story.
This is not a regular story. This is a story of God. God descended onto the
public sphere a regular human. He had come from space, but so had 4 billion
other humans from the past. Indeed, the previous Earth that these billions
had come from was so different that North Korea was a militarized state in
their world. In this one, however, it was a progressive utopia, like most
countries. God, apparently, didn't get the memo.
The Wisps said, "Oh, no! The television has apparated back to his head. It is
as if the memory of the broken screen has created itself in material form
upon God's head."

God was, in fact, blind. He saw only a virtual reality. It seemed that in this
world that he saw, North Korea was indeed another militarized state. It was
not the same Earth of the people who fell to this future world that
momentous day, but it was a very similar version of North Korea.
God was the world's greatest man. That day, he was an assassin. He gutted
the leader of North Korea, mistaking him for the one represented on the
television, and lived up to his name: God. Or Dog, backwards.
Tune in next time on
Planet Sprok

Chapter 4. North Korea finally becomes a free country. And as

the citizens of North Korea begin to adjust to this new
lifestyle, they discover /r/Pyongyang.
Zap. He omnisciently static-zapped his way from behind Neptune to above
Asia on planet Earth. Hell, itself, had frozen over. We weren't looking forward
to returning home--and God was on planet Earth.
4 billion parachuted men, women and children take up quite a bit of airspace
when flying to the ground in parachutes, even if they're jam-packed directly
on top of North Korea. God, with his Helping Hand, made sure few or none
would collide with each other, letting some collide as beautiful examples of
the swiftness and remorselessness of death, and when they landed on Future
N. Korea, the citizens reacted just as anyone would expect them to.
Unfortunately, after peacefully searching each citizen, and accepting the
huge task of preparing them for a life in the future with no international aid, a
North Korean worker found an ancient cell phone logged into a webpage:
http://www.reddit.com/r/Pyongyang
Centuries old fury and resentment came to fruition. Where was God? Well,
where wasn't he? He wasn't there, at least, I suppose. No God to stop the
rage from erupting, the workers all quit, and let the billions fend for
themselves. God in fact had given up and bought a vacation house in Taiwan.
Hella ladies, bra.
Tune in next time on
Planet Sprok

Chapter 5. 200 years after being successfully colonised with

Earth's criminals and other unwanted population, Mars has
developed a strange culture of its own

It turns out, most of this was the Martians' doing, wasn't it, puppy dog? A new
campaign to redirect the flow of the human population has them teleporting
humans all over the solar system. And what's God's Kingdom but the solar
system itself? With Jupiter, Neptune, Saturn, Earth. . . Oh, and Mars.
Mars was a hellish death pit of no return, where super humans were
imprisoned and nobody thanked God for its existence.
So God, with his 3 squads of Marines, and his knowledge of the billions
recently teleported to planet Earth, had his plate quite full of a rather
challenging set of tasks. First, he had to feed the Marines.
"You know, the Martians are all criminals themselves. That's where they take
the super villains," one marine said, off-the-record.
"Those freaks would be like hell on Earth if they got out."
"What are these, fish sticks? I demand space crackers!"
The Will O' Wisps groaned. Now that planet Sprok was officially hell, their
property values were going to go way down. And with all the unwanted super
criminals flying around space, they'd probably be busy with God fighting for
peace and justice. But they just wanted some nice coffee!
Tune in next time on
Planet Sprok

Chapter 6. To combat humanities current problems, scientists

send the less fortunate 4 billion of the planet at light speed so
they arrive a few hundred years from now. Humanity has been
waiting for their return and has prepared accordingly.
In the calm vastness of blackness of space, where nothing vacuums into
nothing like two black sheets folded on top of one another until nothing can
be seen through, nothing at all, except for--Will O' Wisps? What are those
doing here?
In the vast blackness of the calming nothingness of space, where one inch
might as well be an interstellar distance like a light-year or a million light
years because Hell, I don't want to go into quantum physics but apparently
one inch is the exact distance around the universe twice in certain
dimensions we cannot conceive --My god, it IS the Wisps!
"What does the Wisp want of its only God?"
"You're delusional, man," the Wisps said. "You're stuck outside the apartment

with a television on your head tripping acid. We've been waiting thousands of
years for your return to sanity. Your roommate is pissed."
"Oh, God," God said, and took off his very warm hat. A crack formed beneath
his feet and spread nearly to the ends of the planet Sprok. Here, a god,
bridging the gap between computer generated worlds and the real one,
taking off his virtual reality suit without a second thought for his followers.
Truly divine.
In another divine moment, four billion human beings popped into existence
on the planet Earth at that exact moment. The event was imperceptible to
the Wisps, but God noticed. Oh yes, he did. Yes, God noticed. Yes, yes he did.
What does God do with all these humans? Tune in next time on
Planet Sprok

Chapter 7. Marines don't die. They just go to hell and regroup.

While the Will O' Wisps tapped from the bar, the television plant God seemed
to be evolving. From its video game head popped various objects, like
footballs, memorabilia, retro furniture, and other 50's-60's items. The Will O'
Wisps said one thing to each other.
"Disco Inferno."
It's when marines began to pop out of the video game head they were
alarmed. The video game head was a broken television, with loudspeakers
banging wargames in the background. Marines coming out of it wasn't
completely off-theme, but the image of a bent over plant god puking marines
out of its television-for-a head was going to stick with the Wisps.
"Marines don't die," one of the Wisps said. "They just go to hell and regroup."
One Wisp jetted around the cloud.
"Oh no!" it said. "We're officially hell!"
What have the Wisps done to themselves, this time? In what reality will they
find some semblance of peace? Tune in next time on..
Planet Sprok

Chapter 8. Science has advanced far beyond human

understanding, discoveries are made using supercomputers
running vast neural networks. In the darkness, God watches a
lonely machine printing output, a new law of nature!
Something troubles him, this law is undeniably valid but it's

not one that he created.

"This tiny selector told me the undeniable truth. Chlorophyll absorbs 50%
more sunlight than I remember."
We rotated the brass selector. "A second look always takes priority in
science," God said, us riding on his shoulder and forearm.
We jumped from God and tended to the machines. After hours, our
calculations came through. There was another system of intelligence which
nearly matched God, creating natural laws in his stead. We sought to find it
the next day.
God might be a little behind, but nothing with the ability to change the
properties of chlorophyll overnight should be in existence besides him.
Our wisp vehicles found the other god immediately. He was encroaching upon
our holy space, which could have been expected (it was the only holy space
on Planet Sprok). We sent the beast from heaven (which didn't suit it) back
to limbo, or the netherworld, where it belonged.
Unfortunately, God saw nothing. It was out of his sight, so we made the most
of it.
Will 'o Wisp Dark Tavern, Mon-Sun 2pm-4am
was emblazoned on the doorway of the plant beasts, left behind by their
paternal God.
"Who tends these machine fields, now?" asked God, who received no answer.
The Wisps were living at the ol' bar down the Holy Way where the plant
beasts were found. Rumors among the clouds say the Will O' Wisps would be
teaming with the plant beasts if their plant god ever returned. So God's
machine's went untended for a long, long time.
God eventually jumped into the computers themselves. He used his holy
powers to do this. When the Wisps heard that God had been defeated by his
own machines, they returned to operate the supercomputer. The plant god
came forth from the netherworld. God suffered inside the machine, but he
was protected by it from the plant god's powers.
One day, the plant god wanted to play a virtual reality game. He found the
nearest supercomputer -- God's supercomputer, and jumped inside.
Retribution was never seen alike before. The flames came from the computer
itself which rendered a paralysis upon the plant god, who died. And then,
from the corpse of the plant god, rose the television plant God, with a large

video game head.

Unfortunately, this was the current God O' the Wisps, who had inevitably sunk
into a dark depression at the bar.

by fpspfin WritingPrompts
by Spore2012in WritingPrompts
by Drvaonin WritingPrompts
by MateoElFidelin WritingPrompts
by wrestles_bearsin WritingPrompts
by alpalptekinin WritingPrompts
by leetlewetbeanerin WritingPrompts
by ThatOtherGuyAbovein WritingPrompts