Documente Academic
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Documente Cultură
jasonwiese77@gmail.com
FADE IN
INT. DECREPIT BEDROOM IN FRATERNITY HOUSE
A bunch of college freshmen FRATERNITY PLEDGES are sitting
in a circle on the floor of a dimly lit room chugging and
passing around pitchers of beer as several UPPERCLASSMEN
FRATERNITY BROTHERS stand around egging them on.
Chug!
FRATERNITY BROTHERS
Chug! Chug! Chug!
Take a
I was
CHAD
Well it sounds fucking stupid.
dumbest name Ive ever heard.
Jasper,
JASPER
Sorry Mr. pledge master.
CHAD
Look, youre a hundred and nothing
pounds, youre a geek and you have
the social skills of a four year old
autistic kid. Why do you think you
belong in Zeta Beta Alpha?
JASPER
Because I want to belong to something.
CHAD
But why ZBA?
JASPER
Because you guys gave me a bid.
CHAD
And you think your ZBA material?
JASPER
I hope so.
CHAD
(thinking)
Prove it. Prove your loyalty.
How?
JASPER
Ill do anything to fit in.
Yes.
JASPER
(confused)
I think so.
CHAD
Drink it.
Chads comments elicit evil laughs from the fraternity
brothers standing behind him.
JASPER
You want me to drink my own puke?
CHAD
Do you want to be in the fraternity or
not?
JASPER
I do, but dont you think this is a
little excessive?
CHAD
You can never be too excessive.
you dont want to be here.
(turns to the guys)
Should we blackball him fellas?
I guess
Why not?
fun.
RUSSELL
Youre obviously not having
JASPER
Because I need this fraternity.
a loser without it.
Im
RUSSELL
I dont think youre a loser, just a
little peculiar.
JASPER
Thanks, but I think most people on campus
look at me as a loser. Zeta will at
least give me a certain level of
respectability, a sense of belonging.
RUSSELL
OK, if thats what you think.
JASPER
Its true.
RUSSELL
Well on the bright side, at least you
only have a few days before you become
a brother.
JASPER
You think the hazing will stop just
because I become a brother?
RUSSELL
Yes.
JASPER
I fear this is only the beginning.
RUSSELL
Itll be fine, trust me.
JASPER
(exacerbated)
The only reason I like going over to the
house is because they have Netflix.
RUSSELL
That is key.
10
Suddenly, the back door of the hall opens and Todd and
Dominic enter. They walk down the steps towards Jasper who
is sitting on the aisle.
With no regard for the professor whos in the middle of his
lecture, they engage Jasper in a quiet conversation.
TODD
Jasper, grab your brick and lets go.
JASPER
But Im in the middle of class?
Dominic takes his textbook and notebook off of the table.
DOMINIC
Fuck this class, you have more important
things to do.
JASPER
Like what?
DOMINIC
You and your fellow pledge pukes need to
prepare the house for our party tonight.
JASPER
But I cant, I have class.
DOMINIC
Not anymore.
TODD
Hey, its not our fault you have class on
Fridays.
DOMINIC
Come on, we can do this the easy way or the
hard way.
JASPER
Whats the difference?
DOMINIC
The easy way is that you grab your brick
and stand up and walk out with us.
JASPER
And the hard way?
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12
CHAD (contd)
(laughs)
Here, let me help.
Chad shakes up his beer and tosses some of it onto the spot
which then ends up dripping down on Jaspers head.
CHAD
Keep up the shitty work bitches.
Chad walks out of the room as Jasper fumes.
JASPER
(whispers to himself)
Keep it up asshole, keep it up.
RUSSELL
What did you say?
JASPER
Oh, nothing.
Todd walks into the kitchen drinking his own 40 ounce Bud
Light beer.
TODD
OK, listen up jerk offs. After you
tools are done cleaning the kitchen,
I need you assholes to go to the
school cafeteria and steal some
fruit for tonights hooch.
JASPER
Do you mind asking a few of the other
pledges? Id like to go back to my
dorm room and take a shower after this.
Im a mess.
Todd angrily gets right into his face.
TODD
What did you say puke face?
JASPER
Im justIm justIm just saying itd
be nice if I could
13
TODD
(interrupts)
Shut your mouth puke face. Im the
social chair around here and when it
comes to parties and party set-up,
what I say goes. And I say to get
your lazy fucking asses to the
cafeteria and steal us some motherfucking fruit when youre done
cleaning. You got it?
JASPER
Yes sir.
Todd leaves the room as Jasper and Russell go back to
scrubbing the stoves overhead.
Another glob of grease trickles down the side of the
metallic stove top and drips onto Jaspers shirt.
JASPER
God damn it.
INT. SCHOOLS CAFETERIA
Jasper, Russell and the two other pledges are standing at a
long table thats filled with fruit in the middle of the
busy cafeteria.
Jaspers holding a backpack and looking around
conspicuously to make sure no ones watching him before
putting several slices of watermelon into it.
After he does this a couple times, TRENT, the muscular,
athletic pledge class president, walks over to Jasper with
a look of displeasure on his face.
TRENT
What the hell you doing squirt?
JASPER
(surprised)
Oh Trent, what are you doing here?
TRENT
As pledge class president, Chad asked
me to stop by to make sure you idiots
didnt fuck this up.
What did I
TRENT
Look at what your other pledge brothers
are doing and then look at what youre
doing.
Jasper looks at the other side of the table to see his
fellow pledge brothers secretly filling their backpacks
with durable fruits like apples, pears and bananas.
JASPER
Yeah theyre doing the same thing Im
doing.
TRENT
No theyre not fucktard.
Look closer.
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15
16
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18
ZACH
Goodnot great yet.
Zach looks around and sees another handle of vodka sitting
in the corner of the bathroom.
ZACH (contd)
It needs another handle of vodka.
He grabs the bottle and empties it into the garbage can.
ZACH (contd)
There, that should do it.
Zach hands the cup back to one of the mixers who scoops up
more juice from the garbage can so he can have his own
taste.
JUNGLE JUICE MIXER #1
Its perfect now.
He passes the cup over to Zach so he can have his own sip.
ZACH
I concur. As President of this chapter,
I hereby announce that this batch of
Wooly Mammoth is edible and fucking
delicious.
The crowd roars in excitement as they start grabbing Solo
cups to pour themselves some punch.
JUNGLE JUICE MIXER #1
(to the other mixer)
OK, lets grab the gin so we can make
the angry hooch batch now.
JUNGLE JUICE MIXER #2
Lets do it.
CHAPTER ROOM
Its the middle of the party and the dimly-lit chapter room
is packed body to body with dancing co-eds and others who
are hanging around in small groups drinking.
Jasper, whos walking around by himself, grabs a cold beer
from a garbage can thats full of them then leans against a
wall to watch all the action.
TIFFANY
Im Tiffany, whats your
JASPER
Jasper.
TIFFANY
Jasper, interesting name.
JASPER
Sorry.
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20
TIFFANY
No, no, I like it.
JASPER
(smiles)
You do?
TIFFANY
Yes, its nice and original.
Just as Jaspers beginning to feel a connection, Chad comes
over and interrupts the budding chemistry.
CHAD
Hey puke face, some chick upchucked all
over one of the bathrooms. Grab a mop
and a bucket and clean it the fuck up.
TIFFANY
Why does he call you puke face?
JASPER
Its a long story.
CHAD
Ohhh, Im sorry but this isnt social
hour puke face.
JASPER
It is a party though, right?
CHAD
You talking back to me puke face? Its
a party for the brothers and girls, not
you. Pledges work during parties. Go
on, get going. Oh and by the way, the
same chick clogged the toilet with a
nasty shit, so go find a plunger too.
TIFFANY
Ewww, disgusting.
CHAD
Meh, some chicks arejust like some dudes
are.
JASPER
I cant wait for a few days from now when
(MORE)
21
JASPER (contd)
Im a brother and I dont have to put up
with this shit anymore.
CHAD
Ohh, whoa, whoa, whoa, who said youre
making it through? I still have a few
more challenges for you and can still
blackball your skinny, awkward ass.
JASPER
You would?
CHAD
Just continue doing what I tell you,
like getting a mop and plunger and
cleaning up the bathroom.
Jasper looks across the room and sees Trent making out with
two different females at the same time while receiving
high-fives from a couple of fraternity brothers.
JASPER
It was nice meeting you Tiffany.
Chad puts his arm around Tiffany as Jasper walks away
dejected both at his lot in the fraternity and how Trent, a
fellow pledge, is treated differently.
CHAD
Dont worry puke face, Ill take care
of your friend while youre gone. Ohh
and once youre done cleaning up the
puke and shit, bring a bottle of Fireball
and two, no make that four, beers up to
my room for me and her, bitch.
(looks at Tiffany)
So are you a freshman?
TIFFANY
Yes.
CHAD
I love freshmen. Hello, Im Chad, Im
the pledge master here.
TIFFANY
(smiles)
Ohhh, pledge master, that sounds powerful.
22
CHAD
Well you know what they say, with great
power comes great responsibility.
TIFFANY
I find power sexy.
CHAD
And I find you absolutely beautiful.
TIFFANY
(slurring her speech)
Kiss me then.
CHAD
Ill do more than kiss you. Why dont
you check out my bedroom? Its nice,
I have this pretty dope lava lamp.
TIFFANY
Id love to.
Chad kisses Tiffany then grabs her hand and leads her over
to a staircase.
Incidentally, Jasper has been watching all of this go down
from the other side of the chapter room.
Once they vanish up the steps, Jasper shakes his head,
punches the door that leads to the hallway and walks out.
CHADS BEDROOM
Chad is on top of Tiffany having sex with her under the
sheets of his bed while the lava flows through the lamp
sitting on the table in front of them.
She groans satisfyingly after every thrust from Chad.
FIRST FLOOR BATHROOM
Meanwhile, Jasper is trying to unclog a shit-filled toilet
with a plunger while he coughs and covers his face with his
shirt to try to mask the stench.
JASPER
Damn, how does a girl create so much
shit? I thought they were all hot and
just shit roses? I guess I was wrong.
23
CHADS BEDROOM
Now Tiffany is on top of Chad having sex with him as he
grabs her hips.
CHAD
Ohh baby, youre so good. Youre so
good. You might be a freshman but
you fuck like a junior.
FIRST FLOOR BATHROOM
Jasper slips and falls a couple times on puke as he mops up
the floor.
JASPER
This sucks. All I want to do is drink
a beer and maybe kiss a girl, but no,
Im standing here cleaning up puke and
shit.
CHADS BEDROOM
Tiffany is standing up already dressed in her pants and
putting her bra back on.
TIFFANY
Dont tell that nice guy Jasper that
anything happened.
Chad is lying in bed with his arms behind his neck as a
huge grin covers his face.
CHAD
What happened?
TIFFANY
You know what happened, you fucked me.
CHAD
And you fucked me.
TIFFANY
True, but either way, I dont think he
should know.
Why, who cares?
CHAD
Hes a tool anyways.
CHAD
How about another blowjob
TIFFANY
Mmm, maybe later.
FIRST FLOOR BATHROOM
Just as Jasper is finishing mopping the floor, a GIRL
barrels through the door and runs right into an open stall
to puke.
However, although shes bent over the toilet she still
manages to totally miss it and her puke splashes all over
the floor.
PUKING GIRL
Oh, god damn.
Jasper throws his mop down in frustration knowing hell
have to clean that mess up as well.
24
Your girl
JASPER
Shes not my girl.
CHAD
After the last twenty minutes I can
definitely agree with that statement.
JASPER
Youre an asshole.
CHAD
I might be an asshole, but at least
Im an asshole that has stank and
saliva on his dick from a chick.
What do you have?
Chad gets closer to Jasper so he can sniff his shirt.
CHAD (contd)
Jesus Christ puke face you smell awful.
25
26
JASPER
There was a lot of puke in the bathroom.
Ha, ha.
work.
CHAD
(laughs)
OK then, keep up the lousy
27
28
ZACH
Four seconds! Four seconds! Are you
serious with that four seconds shit?!?
You are such a fucking pussy!
Zach reaches into a trash can full of beer cans and passes
one to Jasper.
ZACH (contd)
Here puke face, why dont you take a
12 ounce of Busch Light, go to a bedroom and practice chugging in front
of a mirror.
The crowd starts pointing and laughing at Jasper. Some,
both guys and girls, even throw full beer cans at him with
a couple actually nailing him in the head.
Embarrassed, he quickly rushes through the crowd to exit
the room.
As he gets close to the door he sees Tiffany.
TIFFANY
Jasper, where are you going?
JASPER
Dont talk to me you slut.
With that, Jasper runs through the door and disappears
leaving Tiffany just standing there upset.
FIRST FLOOR BATHROOM
Jasper is sitting alone in a stall rocking back and forth
and crying while sipping his beer.
JASPER
(to himself)
I fucking hate everybody. I fucking
hate everybody. I fucking hate everybody.
LATER ON CHAPTER ROOM
The party has died out, most people have left and the ones
that remain are practically passed out on couches or lying
on the floor.
29
30
31
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CHAD
Whoo hoo!
Chad runs excitedly out of the room to gather everyone.
EXT. ROCKEFELLER UNIVERSITY CAMPUS NIGHT
LARGE LAKE ON CAMPUS
The pledges are standing in a line on the edge of the lake
facing all the fraternity brothers, their girlfriends and
many of the other party guests, both guys and girls.
Zach and Chad walk up and down the line of pledges, looking
at and judging them as they drink from their flasks.
ZACH
So Chad, what are we going to do with
this fine group of pledges as we wind
down their educational period? It is
hell week after all, shouldnt we give
them hell?
All of the brothers and their girlfriends watching on cheer
in approval.
CHAD
Of course Zach and I have an idea.
ZACH
Whats that?
CHAD
Its a time honored tradition for all
pledges to do.
ZACH
You all know how much we value tradition
here at Zeta Beta Alpha.
CHAD
Absolutely. So pledges, strip down to
your underwear.
The pledges look around to each other confused.
CHAD
Lets go, come on, get down to your
skivvies.
33
RUSSELL
In front of everybody?
CHAD
Yeah, in front of everybody. And for
those of you who decided to go commando
tonight, well, sucks to be you.
TRENT
Fuck it, I dont care if these chicks
see my big dick through my boxers
briefs.
Trent takes off his shirt and pants.
CHAD
Thats the spirit! Why cant the rest
of you losers be more like your pledge
class president? Trent is the model
you should all be following.
The rest of the pledge class reluctantly strip down to
their underwear, some are wearing boxers, others boxer
briefs.
CHAD
Damn it, looks like weve got some
needle-dicked pledges in this class.
How the hell did we let that happen?
Small dicks everywhere. Unbelievable.
The fraternity brothers, girlfriends and party guests point
and laugh at some of the uglier pledges standing there in
their underwear.
ZACH
Alright, it looks like theyre ready
Chad. What are they going to do now?
CHAD
What else? Youre going to swim to the
fountain in the middle of the lake and
back.
RUSSELL
What? Its the middle of the night, its
pitch dark out, its cold and were all
drunk. Thats dangerous.
34
CHAD
What are you a pussy?
RUSSELL
In this situation, I guess I am.
CHAD
Remember you can de-pledge at any time
pussy. You want to go home, leave all
your friends behind?
Russell stands there not saying anything.
CHAD (contd)
Good, get in the water. Everyone, get
in the water.
All the pledges, except Jasper, gingerly walk into the lake
up to their ankles.
Jasper remains standing on the edge of the lake looking
very concerned which leads Zach and Chad to approach him.
CHAD
What the fuck is the problem puke face?
JASPER
Im not a very good swimmer.
ZACH
Wait, are those Transformers on your
boxers?
Jasper grabs his boxers and points out Optimus Prime on
them.
JASPER
Yes, thats Optimus Prime, I like him.
Zach grabs a hold of the boxers and shows them off to the
assembled crowd.
ZACH
(laughs)
Hey look everybody, puke face wears
Transformers underwear!
Everyone in the crowd points and laughs at Jasper.
35
CHAD
So what were you saying puke face?
JASPER
Im not a very good swimmer, Im drunk
so Im not sure I can make it to the
fountain and back.
CHAD
Thats OK, I understand. I think I
have a solution that should put you at
ease.
Great.
JASPER
Thanks for understanding.
CHAD
No problem, no problem at all.
Just as Jasper takes a deep breath to relax, Chad pulls his
boxers down, revealing his naked body to everybody.
Everyone at the lake laughs and mockingly point to his
small penis which totally embarrasses him.
Todd walks up to Jasper and points right at his crotch.
TODD
(laughs)
Jesus Christ puke face, youre hung
like a Tic Tac! Have your nuts even
dropped yet?
Zach comes over and puts his arm around Jaspers shoulder
then turns him around so hes facing the lake.
ZACH
Im sorry, Chad can be an ass sometimes,
its OK, everything will be fine.
While Zach distracts him, Chad kicks Jasper in the ass
which makes him fall forward, face down into the lake.
CHAD
Now swim, all of you!
The pledges begin to swim toward the fountain in the middle
of the lake while Jasper lags behind visibly struggling.
TODD
Hes as cool as my dead grand-
ZACH
We need him for our GPA, we need him to
do our menial tasks around the house and,
quite frankly, we need him so we can feel
better about ourselves. Hes a great dude
to pick on. See, when put in circumstances
like this, you know like pledging a dork,
you always have to think big picture.
TODD
I guess thats why youre president.
ZACH
Dont you forget it bitch.
(laughs)
Pass me another beer you fucking idiot.
Todd gives Zach a beer which he pounds then crushes the
empty can with his hand and throws it on the ground.
Later on, the pledges are swimming back from the fountain
and towards the group.
They make it to shore and are immediately greeted by Chad.
36
Jasper!
Puke face!
ZACH
(shouts out)
Jasper! Jasper!
CHAD
Where do you think he is?
I dont know.
lake?
ZACH
At the bottom of the
37
38
CHAD
God I hope not. Trent and Dominic,
front and center!
Trent and Dominic run up to Chad to get his orders.
CHAD (contd)
Jump into the lake and look for Jasper.
Dominic quickly rips his sneakers off and jumps into the
lake with Trent.
They start swimming around the lake looking for Jasper and
calling out his name while the concerned crowd comes to the
edge of the lake.
CHAD
(shouts out)
Come on guys! Fucking find him.
(whispers to Zach)
Were fucked.
Relax.
ZACH
(whispers)
Theyll find him.
CHAD
(whispers)
And if they dont?
ZACH
(whispers)
Then were fucked. Dont worry though,
well figure it out either way.
CHAD
I hope so.
After a while, Trent drags Jasper from the water and onto
the edge of the lake to the horror of the crowd.
Jasper lays there unresponsive.
ZACH
Holy shit, hes fucking blue.
know CPR?
Anyone
39
RUSSELL
Yes, I do.
ZACH
Well get down there, fast.
Russell kneels down next to Jasper and begins administering
CPR.
Jasper remains unresponsive after a few tries.
CHAD
Come on, do better!
RUSSELL
Im trying, its not working.
CHAD
Youre not trying hard enough.
Russell goes back to the CPR and does it a few more times
as the crowd grows even more concerned and some of the
girls begin to cry.
After a few more tries, Russell finally gives up.
Its no use.
RUSSELL
Hes dead.
CHAD
No, no, that cant be right.
Chad starts kicking Jasper in his side and arms in a vain
effort to revive him.
CHAD
Wake up, wake the fuck up! Come on
asshole! Wake the fuck up! Dont
do this to us motherfucker! Dont
you dare do this to us you selfish
motherfucker.
Dominic grabs Chad from behind and pushes him away from
Jasper to get him to stop kicking him.
DOMINIC
Cool it Chad, cool it! Kicking the
shit out of him is not going to bring
him back.
Were in a
ZACH
Yes, I know that Chad.
TODD
So what are your orders?
Zach initially ignores Todds question and just continues
to look out at the peacefulness of the fountain.
TODD (contd)
Zach, earth to Zach? What the fuck are
we going to do? We have a dead pledge
on our hands. This is heavy shit.
What the fuck should we do?
Zach finally snaps out of his trance-like state and,
instead of addressing Todd directly, he re-joins the group
and gets everyones attention.
ZACH
Listen uplisten up everybody!
CHAD
What are we going to do Zach?
ZACH
Let me think for a moment.
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BECKY
This is nuts.
TODD
Stay out of this Becky, this doesnt
concern you.
BECKY
Doesnt concern me? Are you crazy?
If you havent noticed, Im standing
right here in front of a dead body
with the rest of you.
TODD
Just let the adults talk honey.
43
CHAD
You think I care?!?
Zach addresses the guys and girls that are standing around
the edge of the lake.
ZACH
Whats done is done everyone. Theres
nothing we can do to change the past,
the present is what it is, but thankfully
we absolutely can affect the future.
But its up to each and everyone here
to hold up their end of the bargain.
And whats that bargain you ask? We
were not here tonight, no one we knew
swam to the fountain this weekend, we
remained at the party all night long
then returned peacefully to our rooms,
dorms, apartments or houses afterwards
and we definitely dont know what the
hell happened to Jasper and were just
as concerned as everyone else is about
his whereabouts and hope for his safe
return home. Agreed?
(everyone is silent)
Come on people, if we dont do this, if
we dont make this pact, we could all be
fucked. Were all in this together now.
Itll only take one to talk to ruin the
futures of all. Im talking about
expulsion, Im talking about probation,
(MORE)
44
Go
45
46
The area is pitch dark except for the light emanating from
the headlights of Richards car parked nearby.
TODD
(breathless)
OK, that should do it.
Exhausted, Todd tosses the shovel to the side as he takes a
seat on the grass.
DOMINIC
Should we mark the grave with something?
CHAD
Yeah, maybe my urine.
With that, Chad burps then pisses right on top of the
makeshift grave as he continues drinking his 40 ounce beer.
DOMINIC
(sarcastically)
Thats civil.
CHAD
Oh blow me. This douchebag has been
more trouble than hes worth since the
first day he walked into our house.
Besides what are we going to do? Mark
the grave to let the cops know exactly
where a dead body is? Ill tell you what,
why dont we just go down to the police
station and give them a screenshot of
google maps so they know where they
can find his body? That should cut out
a lot of the investigative bullshit,
make their lives easier. Better yet,
why dont we just surrender?
DOMINIC
OK, OK, I get it. But we should at
least say a pray or something, right?
CHAD
Youre right.
Chad folds his hands and looks down in mock pray as
Dominic, Todd and Richard all follow his lead.
47
CHAD
Dear puke facego fuck yourself geek.
Amen.
(looks at his friends)
There, are you all happy now?
DOMINIC
Well
CHAD
(interrupts)
Well nothing, hes out of our lives
forever now, lets just forget he ever
happened.
ONE YEAR LATER
EXT. ROCKEFELLER UNIVERSITY CAMPUS DAY
LARGE LAKE ON CAMPUS
Its a crisp, sunny autumn day on campus as TWO FEMALE
STUDENTS walk along the pathway that borders the lake where
Jasper drowned a year ago.
FEMALE STUDENT AT LAKE #1
Whatever happened to that kid that
disappeared last year?
FEMALE STUDENT AT LAKE #2
Which kid?
FEMALE STUDENT AT LAKE #1
The kid from our dorm, you know, the
quiet, shy one. I think his name was
Casper or something like that?
FEMALE STUDENT AT LAKE #2
Oh, the Asian kid that transferred to
Darden?
FEMALE STUDENT AT LAKE #1
No, that was Peter from down the hall,
Im thinking of that other kid who
lived on the floor below us. He just
disappeared one night and was never
seen again. I think he was a pledge
at that fraternity, Zeta Beta Alpha?
48
TODD
Pussy?
CHAD
Well yeah, that too.
TODD
What else?
CHAD
Hell Week!
Todd gives Chad a high five.
TODD
Hell yeah!
CHAD
Its right up there with Christmas and
Thanksgiving for me. But at least Hell
Week is a full week. Ive liked the
last few days, but Im going to love
the next couple days of hazing. Five
whole days to treat these assholes like
shit.
TODD
You really do love this stuff, dont
you, you sick bastard?
CHAD
Of course, why else would I volunteer
to be pledge master for three years in
a row?
TODD
To mentor and guide the new freshmen in
fraternity life each year?
49
50
CHAD
(laughs)
Ha, ha, good one. You almost made me
spit up my beer.
TODD
Yeah I could barely say that out loud
without laughing.
The pledges are exhausted, huffing and puffing and out of
breath, they are sweating completely through their clothes.
A couple of them even puke as they run.
CHAD
(through his microphone)
Lets go assholes! By the way, the guy
that comes in last place gets blackballed,
dont even bother coming back to the
house ever.
TODD
Man Im going to miss hazing pledges
after this year. Im not looking forward
to the real world at all.
CHAD
Youre doing life all wrong my man.
TODD
How so?
CHAD
Stay in school, thats what I say. I
mean, look at me, I get three more
years of this shit, going to law school
and all.
TODD
Are you going to stay involved with the
fraternity?
CHAD
Of course, Zeta is my life.
TODD
Dont you think youre getting too old
for this, that you should grow up?
51
52
CHAD
It cant be.
TODD
Theres only one way to find out.
Todd abruptly slams on the brakes as he comes up to Jasper
which leads a few of the pledges to run directly into the
back of the golf cart.
NEW PLEDGE CLASS PRESIDENT
Hey, what the fuck dudes!?!
Todd and Chad slowly get out of the cart and approach
Jasper.
They circle him and look at him quizzically, not believing
what theyre seeing.
53
54
He
TODD
How far down did you bury him?
CHAD
Far enough. Whatever, he was dead even
before we got to the field. I swear.
Todd waves his hand in front of Jaspers face to try to get
him to flinch or to at least acknowledge them, but he
doesnt.
Jasper?
Jasper?
TODD
Jasper?
55
56
Todd and Chad rush back over to the golf cart and get in.
As they look back to where Jasper was sitting they see that
he is now standing up and slowly walking towards them with
a devilish smile across his face.
TODD
Holy shit.
CHAD
Todd, Todd, get us back to the house,
please, please get us back to the house!
(shouts out)
Back to the house everybody!
As soon as Todd starts driving down the pathway, Jaspers
slow walk turns into a fast sprint as he tries to catch up
to the cart.
CHAD
Go faster, you have to go faster Todd!
TODD
Im trying, dont forget were in a
fucking golf cart! We can only go so
fast.
Chad and Todd leave the pledges far behind as they speed
down the pathway. Jasper runs around and through the
pledges in an attempt to catch up to the cart.
After a while, the pledges stop running as the golf cart
drives off into the distance then they stand around looking
at each other in utter confusion as they try to comprehend
what just happened.
NEW PLEDGE CLASS MEMBER #1
What the hell was that about?
NEW PLEDGE CLASS MEMBER #2
No idea.
NEW PLEDGE CLASS MEMBER #1
Have they gone nuts?
NEW PLEDGE CLASS MEMBER #2
Maybe it was a bad trip?
57
58
TODD
(looks behind him)
Hes gone?
CHAD
Yeah.
All of a sudden, with both Todd and Chad looking behind
them, Jasper reappears in front of the cart.
Todd turns back around and screams once he sees Jasper
standing in front of him practically peering into his soul.
TODD
Holy shit!
He puts the cart in reverse and slams into a statue which
topples over. Then he puts the cart back into drive and
speeds away from Jasper.
TODD
I dont like this Chad, I dont like
this one bit.
CHAD
Lets just get back to the house.
INT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE
ZACHS BEDROOM
Zach is walking around his room getting dressed for the day
as he listens to Todd and Chad tell their story of what
just happened. He doesnt seem concerned at all.
ZACH
Are you boys sure youre alright?
CHAD
Yes.
ZACH
Bad acid trip? Maybe some potent weed
making you see shit?
TODD
No. Besides the twelve pack we shared
this morning, were dead sober.
CHAD
I was there last year in case you
ZACH
So youre saying it was a ghost?
CHAD
I guess so.
TODD
I tried to put my hand on his shoulder
but it just went through his body.
59
60
61
Its not?
ZACH
Then why am I laughing?
CHAD
Because youre a dick?
ZACH
Hardly.
Zach grabs a sports jacket and walks out of his room.
ZACH (contd)
Ill see you boys later.
INT. ROCKEFELLER UNIVERSITY CAMPUS, LIBRARY
The Zeta pledge class is studying at four long tables on
the second floor of a library when Chad enters the area to
check up on them.
CHAD
Whats going on cunt stains?!?
NEW PLEDGE CLASS PRESIDENT
Just studying.
CHAD
Studying, is that right?
Chad walks over to a table to spot check some of the
pledges computers.
CHAD
Thats what youre doing? Studying.
No pornhub? No Youjizz? Cliphunter?
xHamster? Studying.
NEW PLEDGE CLASS PRESIDENT
Yes sir.
Chad looks at someones laptop, hes on a Wikipedia page
researching World War I.
CHAD
What the hell is this?
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #1
Wikipediareading up on World War I.
62
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #1
Excuse me sir? I thought we were supposed
to be studying?
CHAD
You are. But I expected you guys to
be studying porn. You know, stuff that
actually matters in the real world.
Theres a lot of different things you
should brush up on, like fisting, fetishes,
DP, BBW, teen, cumshots, compilations,
bukkake, MILF, hardcore, interracial,
amateur, anal, bondage, creampie, mature,
threesome, and, of course, everyones
favorite, lesbian. I mean, isnt that
why college libraries still exist? So
that horny kids can watch Lisa Ann get
double-stuffed over free wi-fi?
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #3
Whos Lisa Ann?
CHAD
(slaps his forehead)
Holy shit you kids have a lot to learn
about life.
63
64
65
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #1
(high fives him)
Ha, ha, you got that right.
Jasper flips another page as he continues to read.
CHAD
(increasingly agitated)
What do you want from me?
Finally, Jasper looks up from his book, turns to Chad who
is sitting just a mere foot away and stares him down.
Chad gets an up close look at Jaspers ugly, wet, deathriddled, decomposing face.
CHAD
(mystified)
Ewww, what are you?
Jasper opens his mouth and drools out seawater which pours
out on the table.
Chad dips his finger into the concoction and looks at it.
Although it exists on his finger in his mind, the pledges
continue to see none of this. Its just Chad sitting and
talking to himself.
CHAD
Im sorry that you died Jasper, but
it wasnt my fault. I just want you
to know that.
While continuing to stare at Chad, Jasper slowly shakes his
head no.
CHAD
OK, but whats done is done, I cant
do anything about that.
Jasper shakes his head no again.
CHAD
What can I do for you?
this all better?
66
CHAD
Name it, what can I do?
Chad continues to be ignored by Jasper as he takes out his
iPhone to take a picture of him.
His hands are trembling so much that its difficult for him
to properly take the picture but he finally manages.
However, Jasper doesnt show up on the picture, its just a
shot of the table. He takes another photo but again he
doesnt show up.
This freaks Chad out even more so he finally stands up and
hurries away from the table.
CHAD
Continue studying pledges, Ill see
you back at the house at five oclock
sharp for kitchen prep before dinner.
He immediately beelines it out of the library while Jasper
continues reading at the table.
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #1
Chads an odd dude.
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #2
On the bright side, whatever spooked
him probably means he wont be coming
back to the library today.
A pledge takes a joint out from an inside jacket pocket.
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #3
Well then shall we go up to the stacks
and hit this joint I just rolled?
PLEDGE IN LIBRARY #1
Absolutely.
INT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE
CHAPTER ROOM
Chad and Todd are hanging out in the spacious, but quiet,
chapter room in mid-conversation.
67
CHAD
The motherfucker was in the library
this afternoon. Hes following us,
hes following me!
TODD
Thats fucked up.
I know.
do?
CHAD
What the hell are we going to
TODD
We need proof to show people. Even Zach
doesnt believe us, but he sure as hell
would if we had a video of him.
CHAD
I tried to take a picture.
TODD
And?
CHAD
He didnt show up on it.
TODD
Were you close up?
CHAD
I was sitting right next to him, do you
think thats close enough?
Dominic enters the room and immediately takes a seat on one
of the couches as he drinks a 40 ounce of beer.
DOMINIC
Whats up fuckos?
CHAD
Oh not much, outside of the fact that
Jasper has come back from the dead
and I think hes planning to terrorize
the fraternity or at least the guys in
it.
DOMINIC
Wait, what?
CHAD
one thing, neither puke face
is going to stop me from
with hell week or our Wooly
tomorrow night. Its Zeta
(MORE)
68
69
CHAD (contd)
Beta Alpha tradition and a kid who wasnt
even a brother isnt going to stop me,
hes not going to stop us.
DOMINIC
So you really think theres a ghost out
there haunting you?
CHAD
I saw it with my own two eyes.
TODD
So did I.
DOMINIC
Does Zach know?
CHAD
Yeah, we told him.
DOMINIC
And what does he think?
TODD
He thinks were nuts.
DOMINIC
Well you guys have been known to
hallucinate before.
CHAD
Jesus Christ, are we ever going to live
that shit down?
DOMINIC
You got to admit, theyre pretty epic
stories.
CHAD
Yeah, but
DOMINIC
(interrupts)
OK, lets say his ghost does exist,
what the hell are we going
Suddenly a red brick comes CRASHING through a window in the
chapter room, shattering it into tiny pieces.
70
71
72
DOMINIC (contd)
chapter room ready to cook. He cant
do that if you fucksticks are still in
here cleaning.
One of the pledges mopping the floor speaks up in
frustration.
NEW PLEDGE MOPPING
Were working as fast as we can.
So Dominic gets right up into his face.
DOMINIC
What did you say asshole?
NEW PLEDGE MOPPING
(nervously)
I said, ummm, ahhh, were working as
quickly as we can.
You know what?
me twenty!
DOMINIC
You can drop and give
Is this
73
CHAD
Trust me.
74
75
Stop
Dominic grabs a pot from the wall and goes over to the
stove where he tries to hit Jasper several times with it.
His wild swings just end up going right through him as the
pledges continue looking on as if hes nuts since they
cant see Jasper.
ZACH
Not you too now.
76
ZACH
And what did the pledges do?
DOMINIC
Nothing.
77
78
79
80
81
DOMINIC
Im not going to ask my dear old grandmother to loan us a priest so we can
talk to the dead. What are you, fucking
retarded? My family already thinks Im
a fuck up and drug addict, I dont have
to add any more fuel to that fire.
TODD
This is important though Dom.
DOMINIC
I know it is.
CHAD
OK, what about his old roommate, Russell?
TODD
What about him?
CHAD
He was his only real friend in the
fraternity, right?
TODD
Probably.
CHAD
So maybe he can talk to him? Knock
some sense into him. Tell him that
were not responsible for what happened.
TODD
It wont hurt to try.
CHAD
OK, lets grab Russell then and bring
him up to speed.
VENT LEADING TO THE KITCHEN
Jasper starts blowing air through the grate in the vent and
down towards the three guys standing in the kitchen.
KITCHEN
CHAD
Do you feel that?
82
83
Fuuuck.
CHAD
(trance-like)
Fuuuck. Fuuuck.
84
DOMINIC
And if it is?
CHAD
Then Im going to choke the life out of
him again.
DOMINIC
A lot of good thatll do.
CHAD
(frustrated)
Look, I dont know what the fuck Im
going to do. Im just curious to see
if his body is still here.
Chad digs one more time with the shovel and ends up hitting
something in the ground.
CHAD
I got something.
Chad throws the shovel up on the ground then bends over and
starts digging with his hands until he uncovers a garbage
bag in the ground.
CHAD
Here it is, its the garbage bag.
Todd and Dominic walk to the edge of the hole and look down
at the bag.
TODD
So are you going to open it?
CHAD
I dont know.
DOMINIC
Well we came all the way out here, you
might as well open it.
CHAD
Do you want to do it?
DOMINIC
Hell no, Im not going to fuck with a
dead body. Thats bad karma.
85
CHAD
Fine, if you guys are going to be pussies
Ill do it.
Its all you.
begin with.
TODD
This wasnt our idea to
Chad carefully unties the garbage bag and looks into it.
DOMINIC
Well?
Chad sees Jaspers badly mangled and decomposed body in the
bag while Todd and Dominic cover their noses due to the
smell.
CHAD
Hes in here alright.
TODD
Yeah, I can tell from the smell.
Suddenly, the headlights on Todds car, which is sitting 20
yards away and providing them light, begin to flicker.
DOMINIC
What the hell is that?
CHAD
Why are your headlights flickering Todd?
Thats odd.
TODD
I dont know.
86
Todd and Dominic, who are in the direct path of the runaway
automobile, jump into the hole with Chad to escape.
All three of them take cover by bending over in the hole
and putting their arms over their heads.
The car SCREECHES to a halt and stops close to the hole.
After a moment, it inches up ever so slightly, knocking
some dirt from the existing pile back into the hole and
onto the three guys, until it stops at the holes edge.
CHAD
What the fuck do you want from us!?!
After a few tense moments of quiet, the drivers side door
opens up and out steps Jasper.
He walks to the edge of the hole and looks down at the
three fraternity brothers.
TODD
Get away from us!
Jasper looks down at the garbage bag laying in the hole and
notices that his own dead body is in it then he menacingly
stares all three of them down.
DOMINIC
Tie the bag back up Chad.
CHAD
Im trying.
After fumbling around for a little bit, Chad finally
manages to tie the garbage bag back up so Jasper cant see
his own body anymore.
Jasper looks at the headlights of Todds car which makes
them go off.
Pitch darkness engulfs the park as a few lightning bolts
suddenly hit dangerously close to the hole.
TODD
Fuck, whats he doing?!?
at?
Wheres he
87
DOMINIC
I think he disappeared.
The three of them stand up, wipe the dirt off of them and
climb out of the hole.
Dominic continues to shine the flashlight app in all
directions once hes on land as Todd jumps into his car and
turns his headlights on. Jasper is nowhere to be seen.
Todd slowly backs his car up from the hole and jumps out of
the car again.
Chad grabs the shovel and starts re-filling the hole as
quickly as he can.
TODD
Chad rebury the body and lets just get
the fuck out of here.
CHAD
What the fuck you think Im trying to
do? Im going as fast as I can.
EXT. I-64 HIGHWAY NIGHT
Todd is driving down a quiet highway after reburying
Jaspers body in the open field.
He notices that a crudely written word has been spraypainted on a sign along the shoulder.
TODD
Guys, take a look at that.
say? Burn?
Whats that
CHAD
Yeah, so what? Theres graffiti all
over this highway all the time.
At the next exit they drive by a sign that has another word
spray-painted across it.
TODD
And what about that sign?
say?
DOMINIC
In.
Whats that
88
89
CHAD
Ill admit, its a little fluid.
TODD
Dom, you see anything else on the signs?
DOMINIC
No, I think its over.
TODD
Good, now we can go back toholy fuck!
Todd suddenly sees a brooding Jasper, with his shoulders
slumped forward and staring directly into the car, standing
in the middle of the highway.
He swerves to avoid him, driving across different lanes and
narrowly avoiding other cars and a tractor-trailer truck
who loudly honks his horn and swings quickly into another
lane to bypass Todd.
Todd drives off the highway and through trees into a nearby
forest coming to rest about fifty feet off the road.
CHAD
Fucking A!
TODD
Everybody OK?
CHAD
Yeah, Im fine.
The three of them get out of the car to survey any damage.
TODD
At least the cars fine. Jesus, we
need to constantly keep our heads on
a swivel. Theres no telling when
Jaspers going to pop up.
DOMINIC
Why didnt you just drive through him?
He is a ghost after all.
TODD
I dont know Dom, I panicked! Sorry, its
not every day that I see a fucking ghost
on the fucking highway!
90
CHAD
Chill out guys, chill out. The important
thing is were good, were fine, were
safe.
TODD
You got that right.
They suddenly become frightened when they hear ruffling in
the nearby trees and brush thinking its Jasper.
TODD
Lets just get the hell out of here.
DOMINIC
Fuck that, Im walking.
Youre walking?
TODD
Along the highway?
DOMINIC
I think Ill feel safer that way.
The ruffling in the forest continues.
TODD
Well Im getting the fuck out of here.
Todd and Chad jump back into the car. Once theyre in,
Todd rolls down his window as hes about to back out of the
forest.
TODD
Are you sure you dont want a ride?
DOMINIC
No, Im good.
TODD
OK, suit yourself.
Todd backs out and drives away as Dominic begins to walk
down the shoulder of the highway.
A baby deer, the animal responsible for the noise, emerges
from the trees and harmlessly eats leaves from a nearby
plant.
91
Help!
CHAD
Help!
CHAD
I guess.
LIFEGUARD
What happened?
CHAD
Not today, not yet.
LIFEGUARD
92
3?
3:30?
ZACH
5 oclock.
CHAD
Christ, sorry I totally lost track of
time.
ZACH
Thats alright.
Zach notices that somethings bugging Chad.
ZACH (contd)
You OK, Chad?
93
94
CHAD
Yeah, Im fine.
ZACH
OK, well, get back to the house, pronto.
I need to pick up my girl and her friends
at their apartment so I need some sort of
adult there to herd the cats.
CHAD
OK, Im going to do one more lap then
Ill go back.
As Zach leaves, Chad dives back underneath the water and
does another lap in the pool.
EXT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE, FRONT YARD NIGHT
The Wooly Mammoth party has just started and there is a
long line of CO-EDS waiting to get inside the house.
A few FRATERNITY BROTHERS are manning the door as the
guests file in.
As the brothers are pre-occupied IDing a particularly young
looking guy and his girlfriend, Jasper, who has been
patiently waiting in line, casually walks past them
unnoticed and into the house.
Overhead, a couple of new PLEDGES are standing on ladders
hanging a huge banner to advertise the party that says
WELCOME TO THE WOOLY MAMMOTH.
Zach is outside hanging out with WILLIAM, a fellow senior
fraternity brother.
ZACH
Ahhh, our last Wooly Mammoth party as
students William. Im going to miss
this.
WILLIAM
Me too Zach, me too.
Zach nods his head in approval as he watches the banner
being put in place.
95
ZACH
I got to say, we did it right while we
were here. Thats the only thing you
can ask for, that you do it right.
And we did.
WILLIAM
You know it.
Zach walks across the yard, shaking hands and high-fiving
fellow fraternity brothers and kissing the cheeks of random
girls, towards the front door.
INT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE
FIRST FLOOR HALLWAY
Zach enters the house and walks down the hallway, highfiving more fraternity brothers, towards the
CHAPTER ROOM
Where he grabs a beer thats being held by an unsuspecting
pledge and snakes his way through a crowded room filled
with dancing partygoers.
Jaspers menacing face appears in the reflection of a
window as Zach walks by but he doesnt notice it.
As he makes his way across the room, hes accosted by a
DRUNK FEMALE who dances and makes out with him.
Laughing, Zach pulls himself away and walks up the
STAIRCASE
Where he maneuvers himself around several COUPLES standing
on the steps making out as he makes his way to the
SECOND FLOOR HALLWAY
Where he continues walking and high-fiving more fraternity
brothers who are hanging out drinking or emerging from
their rooms.
He twists his way through a large crowd that has gathered
outside the
BATHROOM
96
The
97
98
99
DOMINIC
Fuck no, were too stupid to be honor
anything.
ZACH
OK, so stop acting like one. Besides,
the bands going to go on in a few
minutes.
TODD
We got a band?
CHAD
Jesus, do you even go to our meetings?
TODD
I was probably too baked to remember.
CHAD
Fucking retard.
ZACH
Lets get moving guys.
CHAD
Alright, well be down.
ZACH
Dont lie to me.
I swear!
CHAD
Well be down in one
100
Already?
WILLIAM
Well you know what they say, I aint
a player I just crush a lot.
ZACH
You do you Willie boy, you do you.
WILLIAMS BEDROOM
William opens the door to his room and leads the girl in.
Its Tiffany, the girl that Jasper met last year, but shes
dressed and looks much sluttier than her freshman year.
WILLIAM
Make yourself comfortable Tiffany.
Mi casa es su casa.
TIFFANY
Oh, you speak Spanish? How exotic.
WILLIAM
Well I dont want to brag, but yeah Im
bilingual. I figure I should be so I
can have an advantage in the job market.
From what I read, Spanish will become
the dominate language in the next few
decades.
Tiffany walks over to the wall and looks at a few SAMURAI
SWORDS that are hanging on it.
TIFFANY
Well these are certainly interesting.
WILLIAM
Oh my swords? Yeah, Im a little bit
of a collector.
TIFFANY
Interesting thing to collect.
101
SARAH
Its hard dating in
BECKY
Isnt that the truth.
102
103
SARAH
Its early, lightweight.
PATTY
Yeah but Ive been pounding while you
bitches have been sipping.
SARAH
Were smart enough to know its a
marathon not a sprint.
Patty spits up a little more vodka.
PATTY
Yep, yep, Im going to be sick.
She stands up and runs out of the room.
SECOND FLOOR BATHROOM
Patty rushes through the bathroom, past the jungle juice
vats, and into a stall where she immediately starts puking.
WILLIAMS BEDROOM
Tiffany is on her knees in the middle of the room giving
William a blow job when one of the samurai swords suddenly
starts vibrating against the wall.
The sword shakes loose and levitates in the air over
William and Tiffany.
William, whos eyes are closed and hands are on the sides
of Tiffanys head, doesnt see the sword over his head.
WILLIAM
Oh thats right baby, dont stop, keep
going, this feels awesome.
Suddenly, Jasper appears in the room standing next to
William. He takes hold of the sword and in one swift
movement slams it down between William and Tiffany.
104
105
She hasnt
SARAH
You know how flighty she is. She
probably went to the bathroom, pissed
then went downstairs to look for Dom.
BECKY
Should we go downstairs too?
SARAH
Might as well. Were pretty much done
with the bottle anyways.
Becky and Sarah stand up and walk out to the
106
107
SARAH
Stop. Please stop.
With her eyes barely open, she puts her hand up to try to
push the bottle away but Jasper manages to shove it into
her mouth and pour the rest of the whiskey down her throat.
108
SARAH
No more, no more.
Sarah starts spitting up a little and is close to vomiting
when Jasper straddles her on the couch and closes her nose
with two fingers then uses his other hand to squeeze her
mouth shut.
She tries to cough and puke but nothing can come out so she
starts to choke on her own vomit.
Sarah violently kicks and struggles to get free but Jasper
manages to keep her down. Her face turns blue as her life
is slowly drained out of her.
After a while, her struggling stops and she comes to a
peaceful rest on the couch. Shes dead.
EXT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE, BACKYARD NIGHT
Dominic is making out with a very busty, sexy girl thats
not his girlfriend in a hot tub.
SUZIE
Are you sure this is OK?
your girlfriend here?
I mean isnt
DOMINIC
Yeah, but shes upstairs playing with
her friends. Were totally fineand
youre totally hot. Suzie, I want to
make you my number two girl.
SUZIE
(sarcastically)
How romantic. Number two girl?
what does that even mean?
Seriously,
DOMINIC
When Pattys not around, youll take
care of me.
SUZIE
Oh, Ill take care of you?
DOMINIC
Yeah, well hook up when my girlfriends
away or at class or working. Times like
that.
109
SUZIE
Well if you want me to take care of you
youll have to go down on me first.
Dominic turns on the jets of the hot tub.
DOMINIC
Im down with that.
SUZIE
Do you want to move to some place more
comfortable?
DOMINIC
No. You dont get much more comfortable
than a hot tub.
SUZIE
OK, up to you.
Just as Dominic puts his mouth under the water, the
temperature on the hot tub mysteriously turns all the way
up to the maximum heat 104 degrees.
SUZIE
Ohhh Dominic, thats great. Thats
really great!
While Suzies eyes are closed she puts her hands on top of
Dominics head and runs her fingers through his hair.
After a few seconds, Jasper walks up to the hot tub, puts
his hands on top of hers and pushes them down which forces
Dominic to be fully submerged.
Suzie, who cant see Jasper, is confused over whats
happening and helpless to doing anything about it.
SUZIE
Whats going on? Whats happening?
Dominic struggles mightily to get to the surface but
Jaspers ghost strength is too much for even him to handle.
After a few moments, Dominic stops struggling.
drowned.
Hes
With that, Jasper takes his hands off and casually walks
away as Dominic lifeless body floats to the surface.
110
SUZIE
Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
INT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE
CHAPTER ROOM
Zach walks up to the makeshift stage set up in front of the
crowded room and grabs a microphone thats set up on a
stand.
ZACH
(shouts)
Hows everyone doing tonight?!?
The crowd roars in approval.
ZACH
Is that all you fuckers got? I thought
Rockefeller University had some hardpartying motherfuckers going here?!?
So let me here you again, how the
fuck is everyone doing tonight?!?
The crowd roars even louder.
On the other side of the room, Trent is standing by a keg
surrounded by pledges and other partygoers.
TRENT
Pledges, grab my fucking ankles! This
guys going to teach you all how to do
a fucking keg stand!
A couple pledges grab Trents legs and tip him over the keg
as he grabs the tap and puts it in his mouth.
TRENT
Here I go motherfuckers!
Suddenly, Jasper, whos blending into the crowd, walks by
and stares down Trent as he begins his keg stand.
Zach continues speaking on the stage.
ZACH
OK, thats what I thought. Those are
the Rockies I know and love. You guys
loving the Wooly Mammoth?!?
111
Zach raises his red Solo cup and takes a sip as the crowd
roars in approval again.
ZACH (contd)
Good, good. Its like a roofie colada
without the roofiesam I right guys
and girls? Hey, are you motherfuckers
ready to hear some live music?!?
(crowd roars again)
OK, guys put your hands together, and
girls get ready to throw your panties
on the stage for The Scalawags!
As the BAND takes the stage, the lights suddenly go off
then flicker back on.
The lights overhead flicker on and off several times, with
a few of them burning out and exploding.
Each time the lights go back on Jasper can be seen standing
on stage staring out aimlessly into the crowd.
Trent continues his keg stand on the other side of the room
and finally tries to stop.
TRENT
OK, let me down.
The pledges physically cant let go of Trents legs and put
him down.
PLEDGE HOLDING TRENTS LEG #1
We cant.
TRENT
Come on fucktards, put me down!
PLEDGE HOLDING TRENTS LEG #2
We cant, our hands are stuck on your
legs!
TRENT
Are you fucking kidding me?!? Stop joking.
Im going to kick your asses when I get
down.
Suddenly, the keg tap is shoved down Trents throat and
turned on full blast.
112
113
Many are pegged in the head as they run away, causing cuts,
bruises and a lot of blood.
Suddenly, a wave of dirty seawater comes crashing down the
staircase knocking over people that were hanging out on it.
The wave of dirty seawater quickly fills up the chapter
room as many partygoers are sucked under, a couple brothers
even drown, while others struggle to stay afloat.
Several brothers rush over to the double doors that lead to
the outside and attempt to open it. However, its been
locked from the outside with a pair of handcuffs.
Theyre BANGING hard on the doors to no avail.
TODD
Let us out, let us out!
With the seawater quickly climbing up to the waists of the
partygoers, a VERY MUSCULAR FRATERNITY BROTHER comes over
and uses his upper body strength to crash through the door.
Once the doors are open, everyone floods out of the chapter
room as the wave of seawater pours out onto the backyard.
FIRST FLOOR HALLWAY
The new pledge class president leads a bunch of his fellow
pledges from the chapter room and through the first floor
hallway towards another exit from the house.
As they turn the corner in the hallway, they stop in their
tracks when they see Jasper standing right in front of the
closed door that leads to the outside.
NEW PLEDGE CLASS PRESIDENT
Easy Jasper. Easy.
Jasper stares down the president and the rest of the
pledges before he opens the door and moves out of the way
so they can escape.
Confused at first, the guys dont waste any time and run
out of the house as fast as they can.
As soon as theyre all gone, Jasper ominously closes the
door and locks it.
114
Grab the
Get closer!
Peter looks down and notices that all the sand on the court
has turned into quicksand.
PETER
I cant!
115
DILLON
Im sinking!
Peters feet get dangerously close to the quicksand and he
can feel himself almost falling in, so he throws the branch
down and backs away from the court.
PETER
Im sorry bro.
Dillon utters out some final words just before he sinks
completely under the sand.
Fuck you Peter!
DILLON
Fuck you!
116
I dont like
117
Next, both Todd and Becky are levitated over the lake,
close to the fountain, and dropped into it from about
twenty feet up.
After a few moments, they manage to swim to the surface.
TODD
Becky, Becky, you alright?
BECKY
Yeah, yeah, I think so.
Todd looks over to the pathway and doesnt see Jasper
anymore.
TODD
I think were OK now.
BECKY
What the hells going on here?
Im scared.
TODD
I dont know, but lets just swim to
land and well figure it out later.
BECKY
OK.
Becky begins swimming towards land, a few feet in front of
Todd, then feels a tug.
BECKY
What was that?
After the tug, shes dragged completely underwater.
Becky!
Becky!
TODD
Ill save you baby!
118
Lets
CHAD
Where are you?
119
120
CHAD
Come on, come downstairs we need your
help.
RUSSELL
Id prefer to stay up here.
CHAD
And Id prefer you stop being a fucking
asshole and come down with me.
Chad puts his hand on the back of Russells neck and drags
him out of his room.
CHAPTER ROOM
He pushes Russell across the chapter room and towards Zach.
CHAD
OK Zach, I got Russell here.
seen Jasper?
No.
Have you
ZACH
Russell, any idea where he could be?
RUSSELL
Yeah, hes probably in the same place
where you buried him last year.
CHAD
Funny guy, huh?
RUSSELL
What do you mean?
ZACH
What do you think is going on here
jackass? Who do you think is doing
all this stuff to us?
RUSSELL
No idea.
CHAD
Its Jasper. Hes come back from the
dead to torture us.
RUSSELL
For real?
121
CHAD
Yes, for real.
ZACH
Now you going to help us or you going to
be a bitch?
RUSSELL
What can I do?
ZACH
I want you to talk to him, knock some
sense into him, let him know that we
werent responsible for his death.
RUSSELL
But you were.
ZACH
Seriously Russell? Im two seconds away
from kicking your fucking ass.
RUSSELL
OK, so you want me to lie?
ZACH
Whatever you want to call it, yes. We
just need him to back the fuck up, I
dont care how we do that.
RUSSELL
OK, Ill talk to him.
ZACH
Good, so any idea where he could be?
RUSSELL
No idea, there wasnt really any
particular place he liked hanging out.
ZACH
OK, lets go looking for him then.
LATER ON - KITCHEN
When Zach, Chad and Russell run into the kitchen they dont
even initially notice that Jasper is standing on a step
ladder cleaning the grease off of the stoves overhead.
Do
RUSSELL (contd)
Jasper, we all get a ton of shit in life
though, some more than others, I get it.
We all bust balls, we all fuck around,
but thats what being a guy is all about.
You know? You talk shit, you do shit,
but at the end of the day theres a lot
of love here. These guys here tonight
were your brothers, theyd spit blood
for you. What happened was a terrible
accident, but you cant blame them because
you were a terrible swimmer. They didnt
know. Theyre sorry that anything
happened, absolutely they are. We all
are. But right now this is madness.
Can we just stop the madness?
(Jasper continues to
ignore him)
Jasper, I beg you. As your best friend
here at school. Theres got to be a
better way than this, right?
122
123
Just
CHAD
Im sick of this prick.
124
RUSSELL
Easy Jasper, my friend. Easy. Remember
the good times we had in the dorms, on
movie night? In the food court? At the
pool hall on campus? Remember those?
You were a good friendand a hell of a
pool shark. I know all about your family,
I know about the things you loved, the
things you hated and the things that
kept you up at night. I practically
know you better than you know yourself.
So what do you say? Lets remain friends,
now and forever.
Jasper walks up to Russell and, uncharacteristically, gives
him a hug.
RUSSELL
Good Jasper, good. I knew there was
only goodness in your heart and you
only acted out because you were
Jasper takes a step back then blows Russells head off with
a bullet to the head.
The stove sets on fire as Jasper drops the gun and walks
out of the kitchen into the
CHAPTER ROOM
Where he calmly sits down on a couch and turns the TV on.
Dead bodies litter the floor and theres no one else left
in the house since theyve either escaped or their dead.
Jasper flips on Netflix and picks out the original Carrie
movie to watch.
He sits there peacefully watching the credits roll as the
kitchen fire spreads and the chapter room begins to burn.
EXT. ZETA BETA ALPHA FRATERNITY HOUSE NIGHT
The house, which also gets struck by lightning, quickly
becomes engulfed in flames as the structure starts to
crumble.
FADE OUT