Contemp Fam Ther (2008) 30:176178

DOI 10.1007/s10591-008-9065-3
BOOK REVIEW

D. D. Castaldo: Divorced Without Children: Solution

Focused Therapy With Women at Midlife
Taylor and Francis, New York, 2008, 254 pp, $35
Louisa H. Kimball

Published online: 16 May 2008

Springer Science+Business Media, LLC 2008

Written from a feminist perspective, Divorced, without Children: Solution Focused

Therapy with Women at Midlife challenges the reader to confront restrictive views of
womens roles relative to marriage and families. In this three part book, Debra D. Castaldo
asks the reader to think about societal expectations for marriage and childrearing and the
challenges for women who do not meet these standards. She presents a review of the
literature in the area of childless middle-aged divorced women then describes a narrative,
relational constructionist approach to clinical work with this population, including a presentation of case studies from her own clinical work and research experience. Written in a
straightforward manner, the author provides important information for clinicians and
consumers alike. The book represents an important contribution in terms of synthesizing
relevant research material from the psychotherapy field and providing clinical guidance for
the helping professional.
Castaldo outlines assumptions made about women who are not married during the
developmental stage of midlife. Additionally, she discusses the challenges for women who
do not have children, either by choice or by circumstance. She posits that the intersection
of childlessness and divorce at midlife represent a double challenge for women. The author
delineates three large tasks for the book: to increase knowledge about the challenges faced
by divorced women without children; to facilitate understanding of social context and
socially constructed meanings; and to explicate the cultural, professional, and personal
paradigms, beliefs, and myths that impact clinical practice with women (p. 3).
In the first chapter, the author discusses the paucity of research in the area of midlife
divorce without children despite the increase of women in this population. She positions
herself as a post-modern observer of this population, a person to offer thoughts about the
clinical work and research she has conducted over the span of 20 years. She notes that her
clinical orientation has been influenced by social constructionism, feminist developmental
theory, Eriksons individual developmental theory, solution-focused brief therapy, a
multigenerational family systems approach, and narrative therapy.

L. H. Kimball (&)
University of Connecticut, Storrs, CT, USA
e-mail: louisa_kimball@yahoo.com

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After describing her theoretical influences, Castaldo discusses the historical, cultural,
and political trends that have changed the way that people think about families, roles, and
individuals in context. She notes that despite changes in educational access, labor force
participation, and family planning methods, Western industrialized countries continue to
support a pro-natalist, pro-marriage discourse. She believes this ideal has become a cultural
expectation that allows little room for individual life preferences or choices. As an
illustration, she presents the case study of a female client struggling to understand her
divorce experience. The author discusses her use of the relationship and both narrative and
solution-focused techniques to help sponsor her client through her healing process. The
clients guilt, shame, and feelings of blame that resulted from her divorce are reframed into
feelings of competence, power, and strength.
In the fourth chapter, the author outlines the theories that inform her clinical practice
and research agenda. She discusses how social constructionist theory influences her use of
solution focused and narrative therapies to help her clients evaluate their attempted
solutions amid their contextual restrictions. Also employing a feminist perspective on
womens development, she discusses the importance of attachment, connection, mothering, and responsibility for relationship as central to womens well-being (p. 47). Using
role theory, she considers traditional social roles assigned to women that make childless
midlife divorce more challenging. She uses the family developmental life cycle (FDLC) to
conceptualize a middle aged divorced womans place in the life course. She notes that the
FDLC does not provide for a woman to be divorced without children as a normative life
stage. She also employs two individual theories of human development: ego psychology
and Eriksons individual life cycle. She applies a feminist framework to these theories to
assert that gendered expectations shape how a woman relates to others as well as the ways
in which she should think about her own development.
The next two chapters provide information about the research in each of the topical
areas separately: the effect of divorce on midlife women and the effect of childlessness on
midlife women. Castaldo reviews the history of divorce in the Victorian era, when women
were considered the property of their husbands or fathers, and marriage offered financial
security. Divorce at that time was initiated by men and generally was considered shameful
for women. She suggests that echoes of that shame continue in the present. She encourages
clinicians to talk with their clients about the transition from being married to being
divorced, taking stock of each individuals goals and desires. Other clinical suggestions
include working around the emotional aspects of divorce, loss and grieving, role exit and
transition, adjustment to major lifestyle changes, identity issues, changes in family and
social relationships, midlife and aging issues, and financial adjustment (p. 71). Castaldo
emphasizes the importance of a holistic conceptualization of the individual clients
placement in her social and cultural context.
In the following chapter the author focuses on being what she calls childless in a
mothering world (p. 75). She illuminates the stigma around not having children in a pronatalist society, especially when women are ambivalent or set against having children.
She lists a series of negative attributions made in relation to women without children,
including being lonely, unhappy, lazy, more career driven, less family-oriented, and less
caring about others. Given the intense negativity internalized by many women in modern
society, Castaldo notes the importance of exploring each individuals self-concept and the
meanings she associates with the decision not to have children. She discusses how women
tend to feel pressure to have children, even when the decision to do so does not feel right.
She notes, women are now faced with the difficulty of weighing the benefits of personal
freedom, autonomy, and a childfree lifestyle against the long-term responsibility and

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commitment of mothering (Daniluk and Herman 1984, cited in Castaldo, p. 81). She
reports that developing social networks with other women who do not have children has
been an effective coping mechanism for some of her clients.
After presenting the research in the areas of midlife divorce and childlessness, Castaldo
uses the next two sections to present themes illustrated in her research and clinical
experiences. She notes that these themes represent important topics for therapeutic discussion and are grounded in the core of womens distress, decision making, ability to
adapt, and coping capacities (p. 97). In Chap. 8, she suggests that clinicians discuss the
following areas: beliefs about marriage and motherhood both before marriage and postdivorce, desire for children across the adult lifespan, understanding about the divorce
process including reasons for dissolution, realization of mistakes, issues around compatibility with spouse, and stressors around childbearing, as well as the initiation and feelings
about divorce. Castaldo provides four stories of women with varying desires for marriage
and children. Through these vignettes, she addresses the complex issues accompanying
marriage, childlessness, and divorce. These case studies provide rich illustration of the
concepts outlined in the presented research.
Castaldo employs a relational constructionist approach to therapy for the final chapters,
using a framework that requires a nonblaming, nonvictimizing stance that considers them
[the clients] at best, within an unresponsive social environment and, at worst, within a
stigmatizing, devaluing environment that seeks to divide and oppress women (p. 159).
She talks about the importance of meeting clients where they are emotionally, not
attempting to provide answers or interpretations of their experience. The final portion of
the book outlines clinical strategies she uses when working with this population, along with
clinical case studies for illustrative purposes.
As a whole, the book is narrative in its presentation of the issues surrounding midlife
divorce and childlessness for women. The author provides interesting research, clinical
impressions, and strategies for working through the transition from marriage to divorce.
She utilizes an empowerment approach to therapy with an otherwise disempowered population, asking clinicians to consider each individual clients response to childless divorce
as normative. Castaldo challenges the entrenched societal expectations that women should
want to be married with children, allowing for a broader definition of what women can do
and desire. After reading the book, it is clear that the author addressed all of the goals
she set out to accomplish, increasing knowledge and awareness about the challenges for
divorced women without children, the social context that supports a pro-marriage, pronatalist mentality, and the narratives that impact clinical practice with this population.

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