Life On A Loop

October 2014
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LIFE ON A LOOP
INDEX
LIFE ON A LOOP
02
Deep English, 2011-2014
www.deepenglish.com
03
ACTIVE LISTENING MAIN STORY
06
ACTIVE LISTENING VOCABULARY
07
ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART A
10
ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART B
13
ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART C
16
ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART D
18
TAG QUESTIONS
21
PRESENT PERFECT
24
PRESENT CONTINUOUS
27
UNREAL CONDITIONAL
30
CONVERSATION LESSON
40
CONVERSATIONAL VOCABULARY
ACTIVE
LISTENING
VOCABULARY
ACTIVE
SPEAKING
FOUR
TENSES
CONVERSATION
LESSON
ACTIVE LISTENING MAIN STORY

LIFE ON A LOOP
Lucy Whitmore was a pretty, young woman from Hawaii, who lived a normal life. That was until she
had an accident, which changed her life. On October 13th, 2002, Lucy and her mother were in a
terrible car crash. Lucy survived the accident, although her mother wasnt so lucky and died in the
car crash. Most people would spend the next several months waking up very sad after losing their
mother. Not Lucy though. Its not that Lucy is coldhearted - she just wakes up every morning
believing that her mother is still alive.
Because of the car accident, Lucys memory was severely affected. She lost the ability to store any
new long-term memories. She wakes up each morning believing it is October 13th, 2002, the day of
the crash. Her father and brother go to great lengths to keep her from learning the truth. They cant
bring themselves to tell her that her mother is dead. Each morning, they give her a newspaper from
October 13th, 2002 and help her reenact that same day over and over again. They always have a
reason her mother isnt there. Because of this, Lucy is able to continue leading a somewhat normal,
happy life.
Then one day, she meets a man named Henry Roth at a cafe. Henry is instantly attracted to her, and
makes plans to meet her the next day. She agrees, neither of them knowing she wont remember
who he is the next day. When he greets her the next day, she tells him to go away. Henry is initially
hurt, having thought he was going to have a date with Lucy. The cafe staff then pulls Henry aside,
and informs him of Lucys memory problem.
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While most normal men would simply move on, Henry was already too drawn to Lucy. He begins
inventing new ways to run into Lucy every day. Lucys friends advise Henry to leave her alone but
Henry refuses. He continues to meet Lucy over and over again, and each day Lucy believes she is
meeting Henry for the first time.
Lucys father and brother werent comfortable with this arrangement though. They had been trying
hard to protect Lucy from the truth. They confront Henry, and he tells them he is going to tell Lucy
about whats really going on with her memory problem. Both Lucys brother and father are averse to
the idea, and try their best to keep Henry away from her. They soon realize though, that Henry is
serious about Lucy, and wont go away easily.
With Henrys help, they start filming videos for Lucy to watch every morning. These videos inform her
of the accident, and everything that has happened since. These videos are difficult for Lucy to watch,
and her family doesnt initially believe they are good for her. Henry keeps showing her the videos
though, and it becomes clear that Lucy loves Henry just as much as he loves her.
At one point, Lucy starts to regret the relationship, feeling she is a burden to Henry. She abandons
him and checks herself into the hospital. At this hospital, there are many patients with conditions like
hers. They arent able to bring her memory back, but she is in a controlled environment. Then a
breakthrough happens. Lucy begins painting pictures of a man she cant identify. The man is clearly
Henry, and her family decides that the best thing is for the two to be together. They obviously both
love each other and both deserve to be happy.
Henry and Lucy got married and had a daughter together. Every morning Lucy wakes up and
watches a video. In a few short minutes, Lucy runs through a gauntlet of emotions. She sees news
stories about the crash where her mother died and she cries tears of sadness. Then she sees a
video of her and Henrys wedding and cries tears of happiness. Even though Lucy has to go through
this difficult process every day, she has a good life and is happy with Henry.
This story is the plot of the 2004 comedy movie 50 First Dates starring Adam Sandler and Drew
Barrymore. While the plot is fictional, there are people who have a very similar experience to Lucy.
Michelle Philpots is one of those people.
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Just like Lucy, every day, Michelle wakes up next to a man who must convince her that he is her
husband. Similar to the movie, she doubts him every morning until he shows her a photo album from
their wedding 13 years earlier.
Unlike Lucy, Michelle was involved in two different accidents, which affected her memory. The first
was a motorcycle accident in 1985. The second was a car crash in 1990, which caused her memory
loss. The term for Michelle and Lucys condition is anterograde amnesia. Doctors say its rare,
although it does exist. It allows those suffering from it to carry out day-to-day activities. They are able
to function normally, except for the fact that their long-term memory doesnt work.
Also unlike Lucy, Michelle knew her husband long before the accident when she lost her memory.
Her husband, Ian, and her had been dating for several years when the second accident occurred. It
wasnt until 1997, 7 years after the accident, that they married though. So even though Michelle
doesnt wake up next to a complete stranger, she does need to be convinced she is actually married
to the person she is waking up next to.
Her memory troubles go beyond just the memories of her loved ones though. She has to keep
hundreds of Post-It notes around her home, to remind her to do simple things. The calendar app on
her phone is constantly going off to remind her about appointments and tasks.
Michelle says not everything about her condition is bad though. She enjoys watching TV, and never
gets bored of the same programs. To her, there is no such thing as reruns, since every episode is
new to her. Every time she hears an old joke, she laughs as if shes hearing it for the first time.
Michelles husband Ian says its tough, but he wouldnt have it any other way. He says it can be
frustrating having to be so patient. He keeps calm though, because he loves her and wants her to be
happy. He has known her for 25 years and feels lucky to have met her before the accident. Hes also
grateful that there are lots of photos of them together, before and after the accident. Without the
photos, it would be much more difficult for him to convince Michelle they are really married every
morning.
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Even though the movie is a comedy, for people like Michelle, losing your long-term memory is no
laughing matter. Imagine if you woke up every day for the rest of your life, unable to remember the
past 10 or 20 years of your life. If youre lucky like Michelle, then youve already met the person
youll spend the rest of your life with. People with this condition who havent though, often spend the
rest of their lives under medical care. What if the person you loved were to suffer from a condition
like this? What would your routine look like each morning to prove to them you already have a life
together?
ACTIVE LISTENING VOCABULARY

LIFE ON A LOOP
cold hearted: lacking warmth or love

great lengths: great effort
move on: to leave somewhere
drawn to: to be pulled to or attracted to
initially: at first
burden: a heavy load
abandon: to stop supporting; to leave
breakthrough: an important discovery or development
to run the gauntlet of emotions: to have to deal with a lot of negative emotions
going off: to start making a noise
reruns: replays of a tv show
wouldnt have it any other way: would not change anything
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no laughing matter: not something to be joked about
ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART A

LIFE ON A LOOP
Lucy Whitmore was a pretty, young woman from Hawaii, who lived a normal life.
Where was Lucy from? Lucy was from Hawaii. What kind of life did Lucy live? Lucy lived a
normal life.
That was until she had an accident, which changed her life. On October 13th, 2002, Lucy and her
mother were in a terrible car crash.
What changed her life? An accident changed her life. She was in a terrible car crash. Who
was Lucy with when she had the accident? She was with her mother.
Lucy survived the accident, although her mother wasnt so lucky and died in the car crash.
Did Lucy survive? Yes, luckily Lucy survived. What about her mother? Did she survive? No,
her mother didnt survive.
Most people would spend the next several months waking up very sad after losing their mother. Not
Lucy though.
Did Lucy wake up the next day feeling very sad? No, Lucy didnt wake up the next day feeling
very sad.
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Its not that Lucy is coldhearted - she just wakes up every morning believing that her mother is still
alive.
Is Lucy coldhearted? No, Lucy isnt coldhearted. Why doesnt she feel sad? She doesnt feel
sad because she still believes her mother is alive.

LIFE ON A LOOP
Because of the car accident, Lucys memory was severely affected.
What was affected by the accident? Lucys memory was severely affected by the accident.
She lost the ability to store any new long-term memories.
What has she lost? She has lost the ability to store new long-term memories. What about
short-term memories? She can still make short-term memories.
She wakes up each morning believing it is October 13th, 2002, the day of the crash.
When was the crash? The crash was on October 13th, 2002.
Her father and brother go to great lengths to keep her from learning the truth.
Does her family try to keep her from the learning the truth? Yes, her family goes to great
lengths to keep her from learning the truth.
They cant bring themselves to tell her that her mother is dead. Each morning, they give her a
newspaper from October 13th, 2002 and help her reenact that same day over and over again.
What do they give her every morning? They give her a newspaper from October 13th, 2002
every morning.
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They always have a reason her mother isnt there. Because of this, Lucy is able to continue leading
a somewhat normal, happy life.

LIFE ON A LOOP
Do you think that Lucy is living a normal life? Imagine you were Lucy. Would you want to
know the truth or live life believing every day was the same day?
Then one day, she meets a man named Henry Roth at a cafe. Henry is instantly attracted to her, and
makes plans to meet her the next day.
Who does she meet at a caf? She meets Henry Roth at a caf. How does Henry feel? Henry
feels instantly attracted to her.
She agrees, neither of them knowing she wont remember who he is the next day. When he greets
her the next day, she tells him to go away. Henry is initially hurt, having thought he was going to
have a date with Lucy.
What does she tell Henry the next day? She tells him to go away the next day. How does
Henry feel about this? He feels hurt.
The cafe staff then pulls Henry aside, and informs him of Lucys memory problem.
Who tells Henry about Lucys memory problem? The caf staff tells Henry about Lucys
memory problem.
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ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART B

LIFE ON A LOOP
While most normal men would simply move on, Henry was already too drawn to Lucy.
How did Henry feel about Lucy? He felt drawn to Lucy. Have you ever felt drawn to someone
you just met?
He begins inventing new ways to run into Lucy every day.
Did Henry naturally run into Lucy? No, he planned to run into Lucy. He invented new ways to
run into Lucy.
Lucys friends advise Henry to leave her alone but Henry refuses. He continues to meet Lucy over
and over again, and each day Lucy believes she is meeting Henry for the first time.
What do Lucys friends say to Henry? They advise Henry to leave her alone. Does Henry
listen? No, Henry refuses. He continues to meet her over and over again. If you were Lucys
friend, what would you do in this situation?
Lucys father and brother werent comfortable with this arrangement though. They had been trying
hard to protect Lucy from the truth.
How does Lucys family feel? They dont feel comfortable with the arrangement. Do they
want Lucy to know the truth? No, they want to protect Lucy from the truth.
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They confront Henry, and he tells them he is going to tell Lucy about whats really going on with her
memory problem.

LIFE ON A LOOP
Who confronts Henry? Lucys family confronts Henry. What does Henry tell them? He tells
them he is going to tell Lucy about whats really going on with her memory problem.
Both Lucys brother and father are averse to the idea, and try their best to keep Henry away from
her. They soon realize though, that Henry is serious about Lucy, and wont go away easily.
Is Henry serious about Lucy? Yes, he is serious about Lucy. Will he go away easily? No, he
wont go away easily.
With Henrys help, they start filming videos for Lucy to watch every morning. These videos inform her
of the accident, and everything that has happened since.
Why are they filming these videos? They are filming these videos to inform Lucy about her
accident and everything that has happened since.
These videos are difficult for Lucy to watch, and her family doesnt initially believe they are good for
her.
Are these videos easy for her to watch? No, they are difficult for her to watch. What does her
family think about the videos? Her family doesnt initially believe they are good for her.
Henry keeps showing her the videos though, and it becomes clear that Lucy loves Henry just as
much as he loves her.
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Does this stop Henry? No, Henry keeps showing her the videos.
At one point, Lucy starts to regret the relationship, feeling she is a burden to Henry.
www.deepenglish.com

LIFE ON A LOOP
Who starts to regret the relationship? Lucy starts to regret the relationship. How does she
feel about her relationship to Henry? She feels she is a burden to Henry.
She abandons him and checks herself into the hospital.
Where does Lucy go? She checks herself into a hospital.
At this hospital, there are many patients with conditions like hers. They arent able to bring her
memory back, but she is in a controlled environment.
What kind of environment is she in? She is in a controlled environment.
Then a breakthrough happens.
What happens next? A breakthrough happens.
Lucy begins painting pictures of a man she cant identify. The man is clearly Henry, and her family
decides that the best thing is for the two to be together.
Who does she begin to paint? She begins to paint Henry. What does her family think this
means? Her family thinks this means the best thing is for the two to be together.
They obviously both love each other and both deserve to be happy.
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Do you think this painting means they both love each other and should be together?
ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART C

LIFE ON A LOOP
Henry and Lucy got married and had a daughter together.
Did they start a family? Yes, they got married and had a daughter together.
Every morning Lucy wakes up and watches a video. In a few short minutes, Lucy runs through a
gauntlet of emotions.
What does Lucy do every morning? Every morning she wakes up and watches a video. Is
this a relaxing experience? No, its not a relaxing experience. She runs through a gauntlet of
emotions.
She sees news stories about the crash where her mother died and she cries tears of sadness.
What makes her cry? Watching news stories about her mother dying makes her cry.
Then she sees a video of her and Henrys wedding and cries tears of happiness.
What makes her cry tears of happiness? Seeing a video of her and Henrys wedding makes
her cry tears of happiness.
Even though Lucy has to go through this difficult process every day, she has a good life and is happy
with Henry.
Is this an easy process or a difficult process? This is a difficult process.
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Barrymore.
What movie is this story from? This story is from the movie 50 First Dates. Have you seen
this movie?

LIFE ON A LOOP
While the plot is fictional, there are people who have a very similar experience to Lucy. Michelle
Philpots is one of those people.
Is this plot fictional? Yes, this plot is fictional. Is the kind of memory problem Lucy has
fictional? No, the kind of memory problem Lucy has is not fictional. There are people who
have a very similar experience to Lucy.
Just like Lucy, every day, Michelle wakes up next to a man who must convince her that he is her
husband.
What does Michelles husband do every morning? Michelles husband convinces her every
morning the he is her husband.
Similar to the movie, she doubts him every morning until he shows her a photo album from their
wedding 13 years earlier.
What does he show her every morning? Every morning he shows her a photo album from
their wedding 13 years earlier.
Unlike Lucy, Michelle was involved in two different accidents, which affected her memory.
What affected Michelles memory? Two different accidents affected her memory.
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The first was a motorcycle accident in 1985. The second was a car crash in 1990, which caused her
memory loss. The term for Michelle and Lucys condition is anterograde amnesia.
What is Michelle and Lucys condition called? Michelle and Lucys condition is called
anterograde amnesia.

LIFE ON A LOOP
Doctors say its rare, although it does exist. It allows those suffering from it to carry out day-to-day
activities.
Is this a common condition? No, its a rare condition. Does it allow people to carry out day-today activities? Yes, it allows people to carry out day-to-day activities.
They are able to function normally, except for the fact that their long-term memory doesnt work.
What part of their memory doesnt work? Their long-term memory doesnt work.
Also unlike Lucy, Michelle knew her husband long before the accident when she lost her memory.
What was different between Michelles story and Lucys story? Unlike Lucy, Michelle knew
her husband long before the accident when she lost her memory.
Her husband, Ian, and her had been dating for several years when the second accident occurred. It
wasnt until 1997, 7 years after the accident, that they married though.
How long after the accident, did they get married? They got married 7 years after the
accident.
So even though Michelle doesnt wake up next to a complete stranger, she does need to be
convinced she is actually married to the person she is waking up next to.
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Does Michelle wake up to a stranger? No, she doesnt wake up to a stranger. Does she still
need to be convinced? Yes, she still needs to be convinced she is actually married to the
person she is waking up next to.
ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART D

LIFE ON A LOOP
hundreds of Post-It notes around her home, to remind her to do simple things.
Are her memory problems just about her loved ones? No, her memory problems go beyond
just her loved ones. How does she use post-it notes? She keeps hundreds of post-it notes
around her home to remind her to do simple things.
The calendar app on her phone is constantly going off to remind her about appointments and tasks.
What is constantly going off? Her calendar app on her phone is constantly going off. Do you
use calendar apps or post-it notes to remind you to do things?
Michelle says not everything about her condition is bad though. She enjoys watching TV, and never
gets bored of the same programs.
Does Michelle think her condition is completely bad? No, she says that not everything is bad.
What does she never get bored of? She never gets bored of watching the same TV programs.
To her, there is no such thing as reruns, since every episode is new to her.
What does she say about reruns? She says there is no such thing as a rerun as every
episode is new to her.
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Every time she hears an old joke, she laughs as if shes hearing it for the first time.
Michelles husband Ian says its tough, but he wouldnt have it any other way.
What does Michelles husband say about the situation? He says its tough, but he wouldnt
have it any other way.
ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART D

LIFE ON A LOOP
He says it can be frustrating having to be so patient. He keeps calm though, because he loves her
and wants her to be happy.
Whats frustrating for Ian? Having to be so patient is frustrating for Ian. Why does he keep
calm? He keeps calm because he loves her and wants her to be happy.
He has known her for 25 years and feels lucky to have met her before the accident. Hes also
grateful that there are lots of photos of them together, before and after the accident.
How long has Ian known Michelle? He has known her for 25 years. Does he feel lucky to have
met her before the accident? Yes, he feels lucky to have met her before the accident? Why
does this make life easier? This makes life easier because there are lots of photos of them
together before the accident.
Without the photos, it would be much more difficult for him to convince Michelle they are really
married every morning.
How does Ian use the photos? Ian uses the photos to convince Michelle they are really
married every morning.
laughing matter.
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Is this a laughing matter for Michelle? No, this isnt a laughing matter for Michelle.
TAG QUESTIONS
LIFE ON A LOOP
Lucy Whitmore was a pretty, young woman from Hawaii, who lived a normal life. That was until she
had an accident, which changed her life.
Lucy was a pretty young woman from Hawaii, wasnt she? Yes, she was. She lived a wild
and crazy life didnt she? No, not at all. She lived a normal life. That all changed after she
had an accident, didnt it? Yes, thats right. Her whole life changed.
On October 13th, 2002, Lucy and her mother were in a terrible car crash. Lucy survived the
accident, although her mother wasnt so lucky and died in the car crash.
In 2002, Lucy and her mother had a car accident, didnt they? Yes, they had a terrible car
accident in 2002. Lucy survived, didnt she? Yes, Lucy survived. Her mother wasnt so lucky,
was she? Yes, her mother wasnt so lucky and died in the car crash.
Most people would spend the next several months waking up very sad after losing their mother. Not
Lucy though.
Lucy woke every day feeling sad, didnt she? No, she didnt wake up feeling sad.
Its not that Lucy is coldhearted - she just wakes up every morning believing that her mother is still
alive.
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She isnt coldhearted, is she? No, she isnt coldhearted. Every morning she believes that her
mother is still alive, doesnt she? Yes, every morning, she believes her mother is still alive.
Because of the car accident, Lucys memory was severely affected. She lost the ability to store any
new long-term memories.
TAG QUESTIONS
LIFE ON A LOOP
Lucys memory was seriously affected, wasnt it? Yes, her memory was seriously affected.
She lost her ability to store new long-term memories, didnt she? Yes, she lost her ability to
store new long-term memories.
She wakes up each morning believing it is October 13th, 2002, the day of the crash. Her father and
brother go to great lengths to keep her from learning the truth.
She always wakes up thinking its the same day in 2002, doesnt she? Yes, she always wakes
up thinking its the same day in 2002. Her brother and father dont try very hard to keep her
from learning the truth, do they? No, just the opposite. They go to great lengths to keep her
from learning the truth.
They cant bring themselves to tell her that her mother is dead. Each morning, they give her a
newspaper from October 13th, 2002 and help her reenact that same day over and over again.
They cant bring themselves to tell her that her mother is dead, can they? No, they bring
themselves to tell her that her mother is dead. Every morning they help her reenact that
same day, dont they? Yes, every day they help her reenact that same day.
They always have a reason her mother isnt there. Because of this, Lucy is able to continue leading
a somewhat normal, happy life.
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Lucy lives a somewhat normal, happy life, doesnt she? Yes, she lives a somewhat normal,
happy life. You live a normal, happy life, dont you?
Then one day, she meets a man named Henry Roth at a cafe. Henry is instantly attracted to her,
and makes plans to meet her the next day.
TAG QUESTIONS
LIFE ON A LOOP
She meets Henry at a bar, doesnt she? No, she doesnt meet Henry at a bar. She meets
Henry at a caf. Henry isnt sure if he likes her, is he? No, Henry is instantly attracted to her.
He makes plans to meet her the next day, doesnt he? Yeah, he makes plans to meet her the
next day.
She agrees, neither of them knowing she wont remember who he is the next day. When he greets
her the next day, she tells him to go away.
She tells him to sit down the next day, doesnt she? No, thats not right. She tells him to go
away the next day.
Henry is initially hurt, having thought he was going to have a date with Lucy. The cafe staff then
pulls Henry aside, and informs him of Lucys memory problem.
Henry feels hurt, doesnt he? Yes, Henry feels hurt. You would be hurt too, wouldnt you?
The staff tells him whats wrong with Lucy, dont they? Yes, thats right. They tell him whats
wrong with Lucy.
While most normal men would simply move on, Henry was already too drawn to Lucy.
You wouldnt move on, would you?
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PRESENT PERFECT
LIFE ON A LOOP
Henry has begun inventing new ways to run into Lucy every day.
What has Henry begun inventing new ways to do? Henry has begun inventing new ways to
run into Lucy every day.
Lucys friends have advised Henry to leave her alone, but Henry has refused.
Has Henry agreed to leave Lucy alone? No, Henry has refused to leave her alone.
He has continued to meet Lucy over and over again, and each day Lucy has believed that she is
meeting Henry for the first time.
Who has continued to meet Lucy over and over again? Henry has continued to meet Lucy
over and over again. Has Lucy believed that every time is the first time? Yes, Lucy has
believed that every time is the first time.
Lucys father and brother havent been comfortable with this arrangement though. They have been
trying hard to protect Lucy from the truth.
Has Lucys father and brother been comfortable with the arrangement? No, Lucys father and
brother havent been comfortable with the arrangement. Have they been trying hard to
protect Lucy from the truth? Yes, they have been trying hard to protect Lucy from the truth.
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They have confronted Henry, and he has told them he is going to tell Lucy about whats really going
on with her memory problem.
Who has confronted Henry? Lucys father and brother have confronted Henry.
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PRESENT PERFECT
LIFE ON A LOOP
Both Lucys brother and father have been averse to the idea, and theyve tried their best to keep
Henry away from her.
Who has been averse to the idea? Both Lucys father and brother have been averse to the
idea. Have they tried to keep Henry away from her? Yes, theyve tried to keep Henry away
from her.
Theyve soon realized though, that Henry is serious about Lucy, and wont go away easily.
What have they realized? Theyve realized that Henry is serious about Lucy and wont go
away easily.
With Henrys help, theyve started filming videos for Lucy to watch every morning.
Have they started filming videos every night? No, they havent started filming videos every
night. Theyve started filming videos every morning.
These videos have informed her of the accident, and everything that has happened since.
Have the videos informed her of the accident? Yes, the videos have informed her of the
accident.
These videos have been difficult for Lucy to watch, and her family hasnt initially believed they are
good for her.
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Have they been easy to watch? No, they havent been easy to watch. Theyve been difficult to
watch.
Henry has kept showing her the videos though, and it has become clear that Lucy loves Henry just
as much as he loves her.
PRESENT PERFECT
LIFE ON A LOOP
Whats become clear? Its become clear that Lucy loves Henry just as much as he loves her.
At one point, Lucy has started to regret the relationship, feeling she has been a burden to Henry.
What has Lucy started to regret? Lucy has started to regret the relationship.
She has abandoned him and has checked herself into the hospital.
Has she abandoned him? Yes, she has abandoned him. Has she checked herself into the
hospital? Yes, she has checked herself into the hospital.
At this hospital, there have been many patients with conditions like hers. They havent been able to
bring her memory back, but she is in a controlled environment.
Have they been able to fix her memory problems? No, they havent been able to fix her
memory problems.
Then a breakthrough happens. Lucy has begun painting pictures of a man she cant identify. The
man is clearly Henry, and her family has decided that the best thing is for the two to be together.
Has Lucy begun painting pictures of Henry? Yes, Lucy has begun painting pictures of Henry.
What has her family decided? Her family has decided that the best thing is for the two to be
together.
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PRESENT CONTINUOUS
LIFE ON A LOOP
Henry and Lucy are getting married and are planning to have a daughter together.
Who is getting married? Henry and Lucy are getting married. What are they planning to do?
They are planning to have a daughter together.
Every morning Lucy is waking up and watching a video. In a few short minutes, Lucy is running
through a gauntlet of emotions.
Is Lucy going running every morning? No, she isnt going running. What is she doing every
morning? She is watching a video every morning. How is this making Lucy feel? She is
running through a gauntlet of emotions.
She is seeing news stories about the crash where her mother died and she is crying tears of
sadness. Then she is watching a video of her and Henrys wedding and is crying tears of happiness.
What is making her sad? Seeing videos about the crash where her mother died is making her
sad. What is making her happy? Seeing videos of her and Henrys wedding are making her
happy.
Even though Lucy has to go through this difficult process every day, she is enjoying a good life and
is feeling happy with Henry.
How is Lucy feeling with Henry? She is feeling happy with Henry.
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Barrymore. While the plot is fictional, there are people who are experiencing a similar situation to
Lucy. Michelle Philpots is one of those people.
PRESENT CONTINUOUS
LIFE ON A LOOP
Are there people who are experiencing a similar situation to 50 First Dates? Yes, there are
people experiencing a similar situation to 50 First Dates. Is Michelle also experiencing longterm memory loss? Yes, Michelle is also experiencing long-term memory loss.
Just like Lucy, every day, Michelle is waking up next to a man who must convince her that he is her
husband.
Is Michelle waking up next to a man who must convince her that he is her husband? Yes, she
is waking up next to a man who must convince her that he is her husband.
Similar to the movie, she is wondering if they are really married, until he shows her a photo album
from their wedding 13 years earlier.
What is she wondering? She is wondering if they are really married.
Unlike Lucy, Michelle was involved in two different accidents, which are still affecting her memory.
What is still affecting her memory? The accidents are still affecting her memory.
The first was a motorcycle accident in 1985. The second was a car crash in 1990, which caused the
memory loss, that she is still feeling today.
What is she still feeling today? She is still feeling the memory loss.
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The term for Michelle and Lucys condition is anterograde amnesia. Doctors are saying its rare,
although it does exist.
Are doctors saying the condition is rare or normal? Doctors are saying the condition is rare.
PRESENT CONTINUOUS
LIFE ON A LOOP
People with this condition are living normal lives, and carrying out normal day-to-day activities.
How are people with this condition living? People with this condition are living normal lives,
and carrying out normal day-to-day activities.
They are functioning normally, except for the fact that their long-term memory doesnt work.
How are they functioning? They are functioning normally, except for the fact that their longterm memory doesnt work.
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UNREAL CONDITIONAL
LIFE ON A LOOP
Unlike Lucy, Michelle knew her husband long before the accident when she lost her memory. Her
husband, Ian, and her had been dating for several years when the second accident occurred. It
wasnt until 1997, 7 years after the accident, that they married though. So even though Michelle
doesnt wake up next to a complete stranger, she does need to be convinced she is actually married
to the person she is waking up next to.
If you woke up next to a stranger, what would you do? If I woke up next to a stranger, the first
thing Id do is look for an exit. If I didnt feel like I was in danger, Id probably try to figure out
how I got there and who Id just woken up next to.
hundreds of Post-It notes around her home, to remind her to do simple things. The calendar app on
her phone is constantly going off to remind her about appointments and tasks.
If you had long-term memory problems, what techniques would you use to manage your life?
Id probably write things down a lot like Michelle. Id write myself a letter explaining my
condition in a notebook. Then Id probably use post-it notes everywhere in my house. Id put
one post-it note on my alarm clock with the date and a message telling myself to read my
notebook.
Michelle says that not everything about her condition is bad though.
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If you had long-term memory problems like Michelle, do you think you would find anything
positive about your condition? Id probably be pretty confused all the time, but Id try to find
something positive about it. I would try to see it as a unique opportunity to live life with fresh
eyes.
UNREAL CONDITIONAL
LIFE ON A LOOP
Michelle enjoys watching TV, and never gets bored of the same programs. To her, there is no such
thing as reruns, since every episode is new to her. Every time she hears an old joke, she laughs as
if shes hearing it for the first time.
If you could experience something again for the first time, what would it be? If I could
experience something again for the first time, I would like to re-experience meeting my wife.
Id like to experience the excitement and uncertainty of falling in love again.
Michelles husband Ian says its tough, but he wouldnt have it any other way.
What would you do if this happened to your partner? If this happened to my partner I would
do the same thing that Henry and Michelles husband did because I love my wife very much
and would want her to be happy. If I was in loveless marriage, I think it would be much more
difficult to make the necessary sacrifices. I dont know what Id do if that was the case.
He says it can be frustrating having to be so patient. He keeps calm though, because he loves her
and wants her to be happy. He has known her for 25 years and feels lucky to have met her before
the accident. Hes also grateful that there are lots of photos of them together, before and after the
accident. Without the photos, it would be much more difficult for him to convince Michelle that they
are really married every morning.
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If you didnt have photos of your husband or wife, how would you convince him or her that
you were married? Hmm, that would be really difficult. If I didnt have photos of my wife, Id
have to tell her things about herself that a stranger could never know. But then maybe Id
just seem like a creepy stalker.
UNREAL CONDITIONAL
LIFE ON A LOOP
laughing matter. Imagine if you woke up every day for the rest of your life, unable to remember the
past 10 or 20 years of your life.
What would you think if you woke up thinking you were 30, but you were really 50? At first,
Id probably think I was dreaming and try to wake up. Then Id probably think I was losing
my mind. And then, Id probably go find a doctor right away.
While less than 99.99% of us will never have to deal with a situation like Michelle, its much more
common to deal with a parent who may no longer remember who we are.
Would you ever put your parents in a hospital, if they could no longer take care of
themselves?
Do you think your partner or family would take care of you for the rest of your life if you had
this condition? What about your children? Would you expect them to take care of you in this
situation?
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CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: Okay. This month the topic is memory. Did you see the movie that this months Core Audio
was based on?
Aaron: No, I actually havent seen the movie yet.
Dan: Okay. Its actually not that great of a movie but its a great story.
Aaron: Its a comedy, right?
Dan: Yeah. Actually, I havent seen the whole thing. I saw part of it on the airplane. Its a kind of
movie that you watch when theres nothing else on. But its interesting because its based on a true
story.
Aaron: Yeah, the premise itself is quite interesting.
Dan: Right. The character in the movie, she has a car accident, her mother dies. And when she
wakes up, she cant remember anything after that accident. So every day she wakes up and she
thinks its the same day over and over again. Then she meets a guy that she really likes. The next
day of course she doesnt remember him. Hes really drawn to her so he keeps going back and he
wont give up. His family tries to keep him away, but theres this true love thread going through the
story that penetrates deeper than her memory problem.
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Aaron: But hang on, I have a question about that. The guy that she meets, had they known each
other before her accident?
Dan: No.
Aaron: Okay, so this is someone new that she meets?
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: Right.
Aaron: I see. Okay.
Dan: So thats why the movie is called 50 First Dates because every day is a new first day for them.
And every day she doesnt remember him, but he does. I mean on one hand, you can make a case
that hes really in love with her, going after her day after day after day. But on the other hand, there
is something kind of creepy that he knows all the stuff about her and she doesnt know anything
about him.
Aaron: It kind of makes you wonder what his motives are, and staying in that relationship.
Dan: Yeah. So in the movie, its called 50 First Dates because each day he thinks of a unique way
to woo her, a unique way to have an exciting date with her. But really, one thing they dont talk about
in the movie is they can just be doing the same thing every day because she wouldnt know.
Aaron: Yeah. She wouldnt know, it wouldnt matter.
Dan: But that would probably make a really boring movie. Fifty Same Dates.
Aaron: Yeah, Fifty Same Dates. Right. And it would probably be boring for him because hes just
doing the same thing over and over.
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Dan: But he knows that it works, so hes probably going to think its nothing really unique to
Aaron: But this was based on an actual true story, though, right?
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: I mean, can you imagine if this was your wife before the first time you met her, and for 50
days, you had to think of a unique way to approach her that would work? Youd probably just do the
same thing.
Aaron: Yeah, maybe. And maybe it was just true love. Maybe he just felt so drawn to this person
and vice versa.
Dan: Right.
Aaron: But this was based on a true story though, wasnt it?
Dan: Yeah, it was based on a true story, Michelle Philpots, and I think shes British. And similar, she
also had a car accident and she doesnt remember anything past that point in time. A little bit
different from the movie is she eventually married the man that she was with before the accident.
Every morning she wakes up and she looks over at this guy who she must think is her boyfriend, but
in reality, though, its her husband. I mean, she does know who he is. She was dating him before the
accident.
Aaron: Oh I see. But she just doesnt remember anything after the accident
Dan: Yeah. She doesnt remember that they dated for another 7 years and they eventually got
married. I dont know if they had kids or not but that would be even stranger.
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Aaron: If they had kids.

Dan: Yeah. So you would imagine every day its like, Who is this 3-year old? Who is this 4-year
old? Who is this 18-year old?
Aaron: Right. So the day would have to obviously begin with some kind of review.
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: Yeah. So it begins with him opening a photo album. He shows a photo album, pictures of them
dating, pictures of their wedding. He actually says if he didnt have those photos, it would obviously
be much more difficult. I mean, imagine if you woke up next to somebody, you had no memory of
who they are and they had nothing, no proof, and they just wanted to tell you that, Im your wife.
Weve been together for three years.
Aaron: Really? I mean I would think that would be pretty strange from my subjective experience of
that moment. Here I am with this strange person and theyre telling me things that, Weve been
together for three years. I mean, that would just seem hard to believe!
Dan: Yeah. And especially if it I imagine like what must to be like after 10 years or 20 years.
Because then, clearly, once you get convinced, Okay, this is real. This person isnt lying to me.
They have some proof. They have some pictures, then you would have so many questions. What
happened to this person? Is my mother still alive? Is my father still alive? Is my brother still alive?
Aaron: And then you would forget the very next day anyway.
Dan: Yeah, but it wouldnt stop you from wanting to know. And as the span of time that youre trying
to catch up on increases-Aaron: Yeah. Itll be harder and harder.
Dan: Youd probably spend all morning.
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Aaron: Eventually all day! And youll just fall asleep and then wake up again. Its almost like a
rebirth every day. I just wonder how that would affect your quality of life. Maybe it wouldnt be any
more or less difficult than what we go through. Its just that from our perspective, were comparing it
with our experience of reality and were saying how difficult that must be. But from that perspective,
maybe its just, it becomes normal life. It depends on the attitude that you take and your outlook on
things. It can be positive or it can be negative. You deal with the reality youre given.
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: I suppose the most effective way would be to have a video of yourself and every morning you
can hear yourself talk to you about what had happened. Give you the clip notes, you would probably
get really good at telling that to yourself. But then can you imagine if you woke up and you were 20
years older?
Aaron: Right. You saw this young person, the young you talking to you.
Dan: While the young person, thats what you think you look like.
Aaron: Right, because thats what you remember. That would be pretty odd. It would be a pretty
odd experience.
Dan: If it happened to you when you were really young, you would be stuck in this childlike state,
you would never develop fully. But I wonder if there-- I mean she, Michelle Philpots, she talks about
the benefits, is she can watch the same TV show over and over again and still laugh like its the first
time. I wonder if she approaches life in general that way, if almost she has a Zen Buddhist sort of
perspective on things where everything is new and she embraces the space in her life, not being
encumbered by all of the recent memories that most people are going through.
Aaron: Yeah, it may have a positive effect on that.
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Dan: Because surely she remembers what happened before the accident, but if you know thats 10
years ago. As soon as I accept the fact that this is 10 years later, am I really going to dwell on that
argument I had with somebody even if it felt like it was yesterday? If I know its 10 years, okay thats
done. So maybe youre left with this spacious feeling where everything is new. Whats theYou
ever read Zen Mind, Beginners Minds?
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Aaron: Yes, by Suzuki.
Dan: Theres a great first sentence in that Something along the lines of...
Aaron: You cant remember it, can you? I think we have a memory problem here, Dan.
Dan: Maybe I was making something up because now I dont know.
Aaron: I dont remember it either.
Dan: Its In the experts mind, there are a few possibilities. In the beginners mind, there are many.
Youre open to so many things, you accept so many more things if you can approach things as a
beginner. I wonder if Michelle experiences that in some way.
Aaron: Yeah, I wonder. I wonder what that would be like. Its so hard to imagine because were just
so used to an existence where the moment that were conscious, we have an identity thats
constructed upon mostly memories. And I think whats really interesting about memories is that
theyre different for each person.
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If we experience the same event, you and I, and 10 years later we havent talked about that event at
all and then suddenly it comes up, your experience of it, your memory of it would be much more
different than mine, perhaps. Perhaps I would think, Wow that was kind of a negative experience,
and I know Dan was having a negative time, and I was having a negative time. But then 10 years
later, I remember it that way, but you remember it as being positive, and Im certain you had a
negative experience but you felt something positive. It may be the way-- You have to remember a
memory is also a construct. Were also constructing that in the moment, and so every time we
construct it, we may color it with our own biases, our own values, and I think it\s really interesting.
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: I think the answer to whose would be more accurate would probably be mine, but that aside,
that judgement aside, the person who had thought about it more over those 10 years would
probably be the one who remembered it works her more inaccurately.
Aaron: Perhaps, because theyve reconstructed it so many times.
Dan: Yes. So every time you remembered something, youre kind of recreating that memory and
photographic memory gets changed with each reproduction. And if one of us has only thought about
it once, its probably much closer
Aaron: Maybe its more pure. Its a more pure form. I dont know
Dan: I mean theyve done some research studies on that. Theyve been able to isolate how strong
an event something was, how so that theyve remembered it very often or people who at least
reported that they had never thought about it since. They were able to somehow determine that they
are more accurate when they were being recalled less frequently.
Aaron: That makes sense. The condition that this woman had where she could only remember up
to the accident, is that the same condition that the man in that movie Memento had, or is that a
different one? Do you remember the movie Memento?
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Dan: I do. The one where the guy also, I think he got hit over the head. He got involved in
something in the underworld and he got beat up or hit in the head. And when he came to, he wasnt
able to form any new memories. So it sounds like the same thing but its a long time since Ive seen
the movie. But that was a great movie because
Aaron: I see. The story was in reverse chronological order, a lot of the scenes.
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CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Dan: For Michelle Philpots, the way she remembers things is by putting post-it notes everywhere. I
think the guy in the movie also would write things down. He would wake up in the morning, he would
pull out all his little notes from his pockets. But he had also tattooed on his arms to make sure, he
would have some messages.
Aaron: I vaguely remember the movie but it just seem like he was always very stressed out in the
movie.
Dan: Yeah. I think he was trying to unravel some mystery. Thats a much better movie than 50 First
Dates.
Aaron: But actually this problem with memory is not limited just to people who have accidents or
brain trauma, that kind of thing. Its actually a natural sort of progression as we get older, we start
aging that we become more and more forgetful, and in some cases we become senile. We lose
most of our memories. With people with Alzheimers disease, they lose memory of everything and
dont even know who they are. So its something that all of us, at some point, will have to deal with
either as the son or daughter of parents who are going through this or eventually ourselves as we
get older, if we even live that long.
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Dan: I was listening to this really interesting interview with this woman whose mother had lost all
memory of any connection to her. Her dementia was fairly, it was pretty deep. She had no memory
of her family at all. The psychiatrist advised her you cant She would always try to set her straight
like, Im your daughter and this is your granddaughter, and that would just make her mother feel
more upset because she just couldnt understand anything and it just didnt make any sense to her.
The psychiatrist said, In these kind of cases, the best thing to do is just to roll with it. Dont try to
correct her. Just be with her and wherever shes going, go with it.
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
She was actually an improv comedian, so was her husband. So all of a sudden it just clicked, it was
like, Of course, thats what I do. Thats what my husband does, too. Its like, Okay yeah, theres
flying monkeys outside. How many are there? I wonder if we can get them to come up on to the
porch.
Aaron: For lunch?
Dan: And all of a sudden her mothers quality of life just increased. Shes laughing and enjoying
things
Aaron: That makes a lot of sense. Thats a good story.
Dan: But actually she got quite upset because she started to talk about it more deeply that she
started on that path. She did feel it was the right decision. But her husband, for some reason, was
much better at it than her, connecting with her mother. Maybe because she still had this longing to
have her mother recognize her as her daughter. She couldnt let go completely, but her husband
could. So the mother started to just love her son-in-law and started to just question, Who is this
woman living in my house. You better toe the line or Im going to kick you out because youre just
like some homeless lady that I took in.
Aaron: Gosh, really? Oh, how terrible for her.
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Dan: Then she started feeling jealous of her husband because her husband had this great
relationship with her mother. Then she would just talk about the longing of wanting to connect with
her mother based on memories. She just wanted to say, Remember the time we went to the beach
and dad did that crazy thing and dumped ice cream on his head?
CONVERSATION LESSON
LIFE ON A LOOP
Aaron: It plays such an important role in our whole creation of who we are and what the reality is.
Dan: Yeah, bonding and relationship, so much of it is based on retelling the good times and the bad
times that you share with people.
Aaron: Memory is a very precious thing.
Dan: The chances are none of us will ever experience this kind of amnesia but we will probably see
that with our parents at one point. Whether theyll get to the point where they dont remember who
we are or not, Im not sure what the chances of that are but its definitely a possibility. Thinking
about how you would deal with somebody that you love who doesnt remember who you are
anymore, who you cant share those kinds of stories with.
Aaron: You have to be pretty committed to that relationship to keep it going because its really in
your hands at that point. You could walk away and let someone else deal with it or you could make
a commitment to staying there even though that person doesnt even know who you are. You know
who they are. Interesting.
Dan: I would do that for you. I would come visit you in the hospital every Christmas and on your
birthday.
Aaron: You better write that down so you dont forget because Im going to show it to you.
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Dan: I would at least call the nurse and tell her to bring you some candles.
Aaron: Thank you, Dan. Its very nice of you. Ill do the same for you.
LIFE ON A LOOP
Hi there. Aaron here of Deep English. Im now going to talk about some of the languages that
occurs in the conversation between Dan and I on memory.
1. premise
Im going to start by talking about the word premise. Dan mentions this movie called 50 First Dates
that he watched or at least watched part of. He says that its interesting because its based on a true
story and I say, Yeah, the premise itself is quite interesting. So this word premise, it basically
means, in this context, the state of affairs. That means the way things are which forms the basis for
some kind of further work or creation, in this sense, the movie. The movie itself may not have been
so interesting but the premise, the idea that the movie was based on, is interesting.
This word premise actually has its roots in logical reasoning. The famous syllogism that, All men
are mortal and Socrates is a man, therefore Socrates is mortal. This kind of reasoning is based on
two premises. The conclusion is based on two premises. The first premise is that all men are mortal,
that means they die. The second premise is Socrates is a man. Those are the two premises upon
which the conclusion is based, and the conclusion is that Socrates is mortal. That means he will die
at some point in his life. Thats true because both premises are true.
In this context, of course were not following any kind of logical reasoning but were just talking
about the basis upon which the movie, as if it were a conclusion, was created. Thats premise. I
used the word itself just to draw emphasis to the premise, as opposed to other things. So thats
premise itself.
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LIFE ON A LOOP
2. drawn to
The next piece of language is a verb and its drawn to. Dan is talking about this woman in the
movie who cannot remember anything after a car accident that she had. Dan says, Yeah, the next
day of course she wakes up and she doesnt remember this man that shes involved in a
relationship with. And he says, Yeah, this man is really drawn to her so he keeps going back and
he wont give up. That is he wont give up trying to be her boyfriend. Later, actually, in the
conversation I say, Yeah, maybe it was just true love. Maybe this man just felt so drawn to this
person that he kept coming back.
Basically, this drawn to is very similar to the verb attract. Its just from the opposite perspective.
We might take another example like, Mr. Jones likes old books very much so antique bookstores
attract Mr. Jones. Mr. Jones is drawn to antique bookstores. We could also say, Mr. Jones is
attracted to antique bookstores, but we cannot say that, Antique bookstores draw Mr. Jones. I
mean, you could say that but, actually, that sounds very strange. We usually say, almost always
would say, Mr. Jones is drawn to antique bookstores. Are you drawn to antique bookstores? Im
not so drawn to antique bookstores. Im drawn to contemporary bookstores. I like to see the latest
novels and books that have been written, so Im drawn to that. What are you drawn to? What are
you attracted to?
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3. hang on
Okay, the next one is hang on. Dans talking about this movie and hes telling me the story and I
say, But hang on. I have a question about that. That guy she meets, had they known each other
before the accident? So as Dans explaining, I interrupt him in order to get some necessary
information that I need to continue understanding what Dan is saying. This is a way, kind of a casual
way, of interrupting someone to ask a question or to add a piece of information.
LIFE ON A LOOP
There are many ways to interrupt people. We actually mention this in one of our learning strategies
and give you some exercises for using them. But another one might be hang on, hang on a sec,
wait a sec, wait a minute, hold on, hold on a sec, hold on a minute. Those are some kind of
casual ways to interrupt people.
If you want to be a little bit more polite, you might say, Sorry but may I ask a question? or, Excuse
me, can I ask a question? Im sorry but I need to ask a question. Those are little bit more polite
ways to interrupt people.
So hang on a sec. Hang on. Do you have any questions? Like this. Okay. Hang on.
4. on one hand and on the other hand
The next thing Id like to draw your attention to is something that Dan uses, a language pattern, and
its kind of a duel, that means a double language pattern. It goes together. That is on one hand and
on the other hand. You use these phrases any time you want to point out opposing sides, opposite
sides of any particular issue.
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Dans talking about the movie 50 First Dates and he says, Every day this woman cannot remember
this guy but he does remember. So thats the issue, and then Dan says, No, I mean on the one
hand, you can make a case that hes really in love with her, going after her day after day, which is
kind of the positive side of the issue. Then Dan says, But on the other hand, there is something
kind of creepy that he knows all the stuff about her and she doesnt know anything about him. So
thats the other side of the issue. It might be a little strange or odd or creepy or weird that hes
attracted to this woman even though he knows that she cannot remember from day to day whats
actually going on.
LIFE ON A LOOP
Use this: On the one hand, A, but on the other hand, B. You can use your voice to show the
inflection between the two. The positive one you can say one way and the negative one you can say
the other.
Let me give you a couple of examples. Pay attention to my intonation and how I deliver this. Were
going to have a party with my friends. Its his birthday. Its on Thursday night at a restaurant and I
know lots of interesting people are going to be there. Im looking forward to going, but Im not sure if
I really want to go or not because I have to get up early in the morning on Friday. So I might say
something like, Well, should I go or not. Hmm, lets see. Well, on one hand its going to be lots of
fun and Im going to meet lots of people and I might drink a little bit and have a really good time. But
on the other hand, I got to work really early the next morning so Im afraid I might be out too late and
too sleepy the next day. Thats one example.
Lets take another example: gun control in the USA. This is a very controversial issue for many
people because on the one hand, with gun control, with greater gun control, peoples lives will be
safer and it will actually save lives. The more gun control, statistics show, actually saves more lives.
Fewer people will die. But on the other hand, its written in the constitution that people have a right.
They have a right to bear arms, to own guns and weapons. Thats a bit of a problem because
people have this constitutional right and they feel that they have the freedom to do it so by changing
the gun laws and taking their guns away, you are taking away part of their culture, part of their
traditions. So there are two opposing sides. On the one hand its good and on the other hand its
bad. Like this.
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See if you can use this when talking about contentious issues, issues that are controversial or that
may have opposing sides. Okay, I hope thats clear.
LIFE ON A LOOP
5. it makes you wonder
Later I say, It makes you wonder. Were talking about this guy who keeps seeing this woman over
and over again, and I say, Well, it kind of makes you wonder what his motives are in staying in that
relationship. Anytime something raises a question or causes you to question something, you can
use this phrase it makes you wonder. It makes you ask the question. It actually begs the question.
For example, recently, we have a tree in our garden, in our front garden, and our garden is very
small and its basically surrounded by concrete. Theres not many other plants around the houses
next door. Theres no continuation of trees and things. Then suddenly, all these caterpillars
appeared just out of nowhere and started eating all the leaves. Within just a couple of weeks, all the
leaves on the tree were gone. And it just kind of makes you wonder, how on earth did those
caterpillars get there so quickly? They just appeared! I wonder what happened. How did that
happen?
Another example might be, here in Japan the birth rate is super low. Its like one of the lowest in the
world. It kind of makes you wonder because Japan is a fairly developed country. In fact, its one of
the wealthiest countries in the world. Why? It sort of makes you wonder, why is the birth rate so
low? Japanese people can certainly afford to have children but why is the birth rate so low? It kind
of makes you wonder. Likewise, Japanese people have the longest lifespans in the world. They live
longer than just about any other group of people. It kind of makes you wonder why, especially
nowadays with globalization and all the fast food people are eating and all the convenience store
food thats loaded with preservatives and sugar and salt and things like that. It kind of makes you
wonder why they still have the longest lifespan in the world.
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Thats when you use the phrase it makes you wonder.
LIFE ON A LOOP
6. along the lines

A bit later in the discussion, Dan brings up a book called Zen Mind, Beginners Mind. He says,
Have you ever read it? and I said, Yes. Its by Suzuki, meaning D.T. Suzuki. Dan says, Yeah,
theres a great first sentence in that. Something along the lines of And then I interrupt him.
Basically, when you cannot remember something that someone said to you, or you cannot
remember exactly what they said or what you read or what you saw or what you heard, you can use
this along the lines phrase to try to communicate the general meaning of what they said as best as
you can. That communicates to the listener, when you say along the lines, it communicates to the
listener that what I am going to tell you is not exactly what the person told me, but its close to the
best of my ability to remember what that person said or what I read in a book.
One example might be, lets say Im talking with my co-workers at a morning coffee break and I tell
them, Yeah, you know what? I met the boss last night for dinner and drinks. And we had lots of
conversation but one of the things that he said, and Im not sure exactly what it was, but its
something along the lines of, If we cannot make this company more profitable, then people will start
losing their jobs. Thats not his exact words, but it was something along the lines of that.
That might be an example of how this phrase might be used in the conversation.
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7. dry humor
A bit later, were talking about memory and remembering something from the distant past and how
accurate it would be. Then Dan says, Well, I think if it was between me and you, the answer to
whose memory would be more accurate would probably be mine. But that aside, the person who
had thought about it more over those ten years would probably be the one who remembered it more
inaccurately.
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This is an example of what I call dry humor and its basically Dans attempt to be funny. This kind of
humor only works if the listener or listeners truly understand the full context of the conversation and
the relationship between the speaker and the listener, or the speaker and the listeners.
This kind of humor is very hard to pick up on or understand if youre not familiar with the speaker
and the listener and the full context. Sometimes, native speakers will use this kind of humor and its
hard to pick up on. Theres another good phrase, pick up on. Its hard to pick up on unless you
have full understanding of the context. I just wanted to point out that he didnt really believe that his
would be more accurate. He was just making a joke and I understood it. I think I remember laughing
a little bit. It wasnt that funny, Dan.
.
8. just roll with it
Im going to move on into the next phrase which is just roll with it. Were talking about the situation
where a mother is experiencing dementia. She cannot remember things at all. Her daughter has
come to help her and live with her and the daughters husband also is living with them. Dan says,
Well, the best thing rather than trying to correct the mothers lack of memory and tell her what is
true and what is not, is just to roll with it. Whatever she says, just roll with it, and that will be the
best. Dont try to correct her. Just be with her and wherever shes going, just go with. Just roll with
it.
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Basically what this means is to adapt yourself and just follow the situation. Follow the context
wherever it goes and dont try to control it or change it or fight it. Just like a log floating down a river,
the log is an inanimate object and it cannot control where the river is talking it. Whereas a swimmer
in the river does have some control, depending on the strength of the current, where to go and how
to fight that current o save his or her life or to get to a certain point in the river. Thats what he
means. Even if its totally crazy what the mother says, just pretend that its real. Just roll with it.
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You might hear this when people are taking about difficulties in life. If things arent going your way in
life, if things are too difficult, well, just roll with it. It will create less stress and fewer problems for
you. You might hear someone say, Yeah theres lots of changes going on in our society right now
especially with the new government but instead of fighting these changes, maybe its just best to roll
with them. Give the government a chance to make things better for the citizens, something like that.
Another way you can communicate the same meaning is to say go with the flow. Some people say
go with the flow or you also hear roll with the punches. Sometimes in life you have to roll with the
punches. You have to go with the flow. Just roll with it. Just go with it.
9. toe the line
A few more. One of them is tow the line. Dan says, The mother started to just love her son-in-law
and started to just question, Who is this woman? referring to her daughter. Who is this woman
living in my house? Hey, you better toe the line or Im going to kick you out.
Toe the line basically means to follow the rules strictly, to submit to authority, to conform with the
rules of the culture that youre in. It kind of has an authoritarian meaning. For this reason I think it
comes from perhaps a military origin where the military sergeant would yell at the privates and say,
Okay, line up! and people had to run and toe the line. Put their toes right on a straight line so that
everyone is lined up. Im sure you can imagine this in a public school or a private school system
thats very strict and authoritarian where the students at a certain time have to line up and they need
to toe the line. They need to follow orders, they need to obey their teachers, or the soldiers need to
obey their superiors. So toe the line.
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You also hear this in politics. Some politicians, when it comes to voting or making decisions, they
toe the party line. They always toe the party line. What that means essentially is they just do
whatever the party does. They dont think for themselves. They just follow the decisions that their
political party wants to make. That can be good or bad depending on what you want out of your
politician.
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10. in your hands

Finally, one more and its in your hands. Were talking about a situation where your parent, your
mother or your father, completely goes senile and cannot even remember who you are often. In this
situation you have to be pretty committed to that relationship, is what I say. You have to keep it
going because, really, that relationship is in your hands at that point. You can walk away and let
someone else deal with it or you can make a commitment to staying there even though that person
doesnt know who you are. Its in your hands, that decision. That persons fate is in your hands. That
means youre in control of it. The situation is in your control. Its up to you to decide what to do.
People use this by changing your to in my hands, its in his hands, its in our hands, its in their
hands, et cetera. It just depends on the situation how you use this phrase. One example might be,
youre walking along and suddenly you see a car accident and someones lying there, bleeding on
the road. You need to do first aid on that injured person until the paramedics arrive by ambulance.
After that, its in their hands. Its no longer in your hands. Its in their hands. The fate of that injured
person is in their hands.
Another example might be, Oh hey, I went on a job interview last week and I did the best I could. I
thought I gave a really good interview. I thought it went really well. But now the decision is totally in
their hands so Im just waiting to hear from them. Its all in their hands now. My fate as to whether I
get the job or not is no longer in my hands. Its in their hands. Its up to them. Thats another phrase,
up to that you can use. Its up to them, its up to the paramedics, its up to that guy, et cetera.
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What you do with all of these vocabulary and languages patterns that Ive just talked about is totally
in your hands now. Its in your control. Its up to you. Are you going to use these in conversation or
are you just going to listen and forget them? Its in your hands.
PHOTO CREDITS
LIFE ON A LOOP
Photo Cover, fran.trudeau, Many Suns (CC BY 2.0)

(https://www.flickr.com/photos/21898655@N05/8300759398)
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October 2014

ACTIVE LISTENING MAIN STORY

ACTIVE LISTENING VOCABULARY

ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART A

ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART B

ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART C

ACTIVE SPEAKING - PART D

ACTIVE LISTENING MAIN STORY

ACTIVE LISTENING VOCABULARY

cold hearted: lacking warmth or love

no laughing matter: not something to be joked about

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART A

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART A

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART A

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART B

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART B

Deep English, 2011-2014

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART B

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART C

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART C

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART C

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART D

ACTIVE SPEAKING / PART D

Deep English, 2011-2014

Aaron: If they had kids.

Deep English, 2011-2014

Thats when you use the phrase it makes you wonder.

6. along the lines

10. in your hands

Photo Cover, fran.trudeau, Many Suns (CC BY 2.0)

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