Knee

Howdy
Challenge Chinese Vocabulary
Words to a Duel and Bury em
Six Feet Under in Your Brain

Knee Howdy

Table of Contents
Introduction!...........................................3
Sounds Like!...........................................5
Problem Sounds!...................................6
English Has Tones Too!.........................8
Chapter 1 - Knee Howdy!!...................11
Chapter 2 - Running Shirt!..................29
Chapter 3 - Wowie Kazowie!...............39
Chapter 4 - Gong Swatter!...................55
Chapter 5 - Mahjongg Wars!................69
Chapter 6 - Rolaids!...........................83
Chapter 7 - High Shirt!.........................97
Chapter 8 - Seeing the Way!..............107
Appendix!............................................117

Introduction
The mission of this book is not only to help you
memorize how to say your first words of Mandarin
Chinese, but to also inspire you to learn hundreds or
even thousands more. You shouldnt have to use
flashcards, just use your imagination instead. When
children memorize all the names of the characters in an
animated feature film, it isnt because they study long
and hard, its because they actively engage in these
stories with their imaginations. We will use this same
technique to help us conquer two major obstacles to
learning Chinese words.
The first problem with Chinese vocabulary is that
there are very few words that sound similar to their
English counterparts. An example of one such rare
cognate is kfi* , which sounds similar to C O F F E E . It
makes that word easy to remember, but most Chinese
words sound nothing like their English counterparts.
Unless you stretch your imagination and twist the words
a little, there will be no hook on which to hang your
new words.
To that end, in each chapter there are brief dialogs
followed by wacky little micro-stories stories that will
stimulate your imagination and make the new vocabulary
words practically unforgettable. You can improve your
Pronounced like CAR FACE (Only pronounce the bold letters) with two relatively
high pitched tones.
*

For a fairly comprehensive list of words that do sound the same as English words,
see Loan Words in the Appendix.

Knee Howdy
memory even further if you tell your friends about them
when you are away from the book. Retelling the stories
in your own words and laughing out loud with friends
will embed the words deep in your mind.
A second problem we will conquer is the oftenintimidating 4 tones. You have to stand up and get your
body moving. For instance, if a word you are trying to
remember is a 4th tone word, you might stomp your foot
when you say that word. Make the tone hint movements
described in this book and you can stay physically
active while you at the same time build mental muscle
memory.

A Word of Caution
Please, do not fall into the trap of
thinking that it would be easier to just
memorize these words by rote. Dont
be a fuddy duddy! It has been
scientifically proven that if you are
having fun while learning, then you will
produce better results.
So stand up and face your enemy with your hand on
your weapon. Get ready to learn to be a quick draw.

Sounds Like
A pronunciation helper is offered with each new
appearance of a Chinese word in this book. For
example:
Character:
Pinyin: n ho
Sounds like: knee howdy
English: hello
Notice that the last two letters of the word HOWDY above,
the D and the Y, are not bold. The reason is that these
two letters are silent. To pronounce the Chinese word
correctly you should only say KNEE HOW and leave off
the DY sound. I could have tried to make up a story
using the word HOW, with no bold letters at all, but this
would probably just be too boring and not stimulating
enough to provide a good memory hook. How do you
imagine the word HOW anyway? On the other hand it is
easy to conjure up an image of the word HOWDY.

Extra help

In case you arent sure how to pronounce a word or

you just want to hear a real Chinese person say them,
you can visit KneeHowdy.com to listen to any of these
words pronounced by a native speaker. There is a
downloadable chart that lets you listen to any and all
Chinese sounds. I highly recommend it.

Knee Howdy

Problem Sounds
Most Chinese sounds have a very similar sound in
English. There are a few sounds, however, that take
more practice. For instance, there are two SH sounds in
Mandarin Chinese. One is spelled with an sh and one is
spelled with an x. If you dont distinguish between these
two SH sounds, you might not hear the difference, but
the native listener will. Just like you can readily hear the
difference between TH and S, but a Chinese person has
trouble.

- Sounds like the last two letters of CATS

ch

- Touch your tongue to the roof of your mouth and

make a CH sound.

- Touch your tongue to the roof of your mouth and

make an R sound.
Advanced: Let a little air pass through so it makes
a very slight SH sound at the same time.

sh

- Touch your tongue to the roof of your mouth

and make an SH sound. If your tongue is in the right
place it will also make an R sound as in the word SURE.

- Put your mouth in the position to make a long E

sound. Like this, EEEEEEE. Then while you keep making
the long E sound and move only your lips to how you
would have them if you were going to make a long U
sound. The resulting sound is kind of like a long U and
a long E mixed together.

- Sounds like a hissing sound but with an SH sound

instead of an S.
Advanced: Touch the tip of your tongue to the
back of your bottom front teeth. Hold that while
you also touch the top of your tongue to the
ridge near your teeth at the roof of your mouth.
This is where the sound somes from. Try to make
an SH sound by letting air pass between the top
of your tongue and the ridge. It should come out
sounding like a weaker, hissing SH, and that
would be correct.

- Sounds like the middle two letters of KUDZU.

zh

- Touch your tongue to the roof of your mouth and

make a J sound. If your tongue is in the right place it
will also make an R sound as in the first part of the
word JURY.

Knee Howdy

English Has Tones Too

Dont let anybody scare you when they talk about the 4
tones of Mandarin Chinese. English has all those tones
and more. The only difference is, whereas English tones
can convey meaning and emotion, Chinese tones can
only convey meaning.
When you write Chinese using English letters instead of
Chinese characters you indicate the tone with either a
special series of symbols or by putting the tone number
right after each syllable. This is called Pinyin or
pin1yin1.

Meet the 4 tones

1st Tone
Symbol:
Pitch: Relatively high,
but not like a chipmunk.
This is the tone you
make when a doctor tells
you to stick your tongue
out and say Aaaahh.

2nd Tone
Symbol:
Pitch: Rising from a
medium pitch to the
same as 1st.
This tone sounds exactly
like the lilt at the end of
a question. Examples:
What? Eh?

3rd Tone
Symbol:
Pitch: Usually Low.
This tone is usually just a
low tone, but there are a
few exceptions:
When it is immediately
before another 3rd tone it
sounds exactly like a 2nd
tone and the next one is
just a normal low tone.
Thats why n ho sounds
like n ho.
Advanced: When it is to be
said by itself, to be
emphasized in a sentence
or to be said at the end
of a sentence it starts
medium low then goes
lower and then goes up to
medium.
These are all tones that
we have in English. So
believe me, you can do it
and with practice you
will be able to do it well!

4th Tone
Symbol: `
Pitch: Falls abruptly from
medium to low.
Until you can do this tone
perfectly you might have
to stomp your foot or clap
your hands while you say
a word with this tone.

The Fifth Tone

Symbol: (none)
Pitch: Neutral
Some call this a tone and
some dont. The reason is
because it is neutral, just
like an unstressed syllable
in English.
An example is the word
CHICKEN. In English, that
first stressed syllable
CHICK- is stressed like the
Chinese 4th tone and the
last syllable -EN has no
stress, similar to the
Chinese neutral tone.

Knee Howdy

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Chapter 1 - Knee Howdy!

Knee Howdy
Dialog
You:
Hello. My name is _________.* Whats your name?
N ho. W jio __. N jio shnme mngzi?
Chen Yang:
My last name is Chen. First name is Yng.
W xng Chn. Jio** Yng.
You:
Pleased to meet you.
Jin do n hn goxng.
Chen Yang:
Likewise.
W y sh.
*

See page ? for a list of common English names pronounced in Chinese.

Most Chinese verbs can include the thought of to be. So, there is no
need to say I am called, I called is correct in Chinese. Also, since there
is absolutely no conjugation in Chinese, it would literally be translated as I
call instead of I called.

To form a question, you usually phrase it the same was as a statement

but you put the question word in the spot where the answer is supposed to
go.

Chinese give their family name first and their given name last, the
opposite of how we do it.
**

If the subject of a sentence is understood, you dont have to repeat it in a

second sentence.

In Chinese lots of words can act as verbs and adjectives. For instance,
goxng. This can mean happy (adjective) or it can also mean to be
happy (verb).

Literally: I also be. Or, I also am.

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Character:
Pinyin: n
Sounds like: knee
English: you
Memory Hook: Imagine a teacher that calls on people
by pointing at them with her knee. Instead of pointing
with her finger and saying "you", she points with her
knee and says n.
Tone Hint: While saying "knee" point down at your
knee and then raise your knee up to meet your finger.
That is how the tone is said when it is alone or at the
end of a sentence. Down then up.

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Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin: ho
Sounds like: howdy
English: good
Memory Hook: When a cowboy says "Howdy", we know
he is saying that everything is fine and good.
Tone Hint: Its the same way as a cowboy says it when
he's real relaxed. Low then comes back up at the end.

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Character:
Pinyin: n ho
Sounds like: knee howdy
English: hello
Memory Hook: Kung fu master delivers a KNEE to the
face of a cowboy saying Howdy. Thats a mighty fine
way to say hello.
Tone Hint: When two 3rd tones are together, like in n
ho, the first syllable changes to a 2nd (rising tone).
When you picture this in your head, imagine the kung fu
master rising up through the air to knee the cowboy in
the face. This only relaxes the cowboy and he says
"Howdy".

15

Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin: w
Sounds like: moi? (french)
English: I, me
Memory Hook: You are in Paris. Someone points at you
accusatively. You respond innocently, "moi?. MOI means
me in French.
Now you are in Beijing. Again, someone points at you
accusatively. You again respond innocently, w?. W
means I or me in Chinese.
Pronunciation Hint: I understand that you might not
know French, but you almost certainly have heard the
French word MOI. Google it if you have to.
Tone Hint: Imagine how a snooty woman would respond
to an accusation, a low then rising tone. Moi?

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Character:
Pinyin: w jio
Sounds like: WATCH OUT!
English: Im called (literally: I call)

Memory Hook: Of course you are scared when you

meet a new Chinese person because you know you're
going to practice what you've learned. So, tell yourself
to watch out and you will be saying Im called _____.
Pronunciation Twist: Replace the tch sound with a J
sound.
Tone Hint: If you say watch out! quickly in an
emergency, you will probably start with a low tone and
then a stomp your foot tone.

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Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin: jio
Sounds like: jowls (the cheeks of a hound dog)
English: call
Memory Hook: You have a pet hound dog named
Jowls. Call him over to you... He doesn't come. Call
him over again, but this time stomp your foot when you
yell his name sharply. Jowls! Get over here!
Tone Hint: Its a good idea to actually get out of your
seat and stomp your foot when you are practicing the
4th tone.

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Character:
Pinyin: shnme
Sounds like: shun mother
English: what
Memory Hook: For what possible reason would you
shun your mother? What did she ever do to you?
Tone Hint: When you say WHAT? the tone is a rising
question-like tone. It is the same with the first syllable of
shnme. The last syllable is a neutral tone, which is
very similar if not the same as any other unstressed
English syllable.

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Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin: mngzi
Sounds like: mean gesundheit
English: name
Memory Hook: Have you heard the joke about how
Chinese people name their children? They throw some
pots and pans on the ground and whatever sound it
makes is what they name their newborn.
Well, this is only partially true. What the joke doesnt
explain is that they wait for the babys first sneeze. This
always startles everyone around and someone invariably
drops whatever they are carrying. That is when they find
a name for the baby.
Now of course the baby doesnt like that and if he
could talk (and speak English) he would undoubtedly say
Now, that was a mean gesundheit!
Pronunciation Twist: The S in GESUNDHEIT is
pronounced like the letter Z. Pronounce the N and the G
together to make an NG sound.
Tone Hint: Simple! When we are talking to someone, we
usually ask their name. When someone asks a question
there is usually a rising tone at the end of the
sentence. There is always a rising tone on the first
syllable of the word mngzi.

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Character:
Pinyin: xng
Sounds like: Washington
English: last name, family name, surname
Memory Hook: I approached a Chinese person that I
hadnt met before in my town and I asked him his
name. N jio shnme mngzi?, I said. He replied, W
xng Chn. I was a beginner so I thought he was telling
me that his name was Washington. Then I said Pleased
to meet you, Wxngchn. Needless to say I was
embarrased when I realized I had inadverdantly told him
that I also have the same last name as him, Chen.
Tone Hint: That was one of my first embarrasing
mistakes I made while learning Chinese. I am sure there
will be more. When I make a mistake like that I feel like
stomping my foot.

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Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin: jin
Sounds like: G.N.
English: to see
Memory Hook: You arrive at work a few minutes late,
as usual, and immediately your friend, whom you have
always expected is not really your friend, tells you that
the General Manager wants to see you. Your hearts
skips a beat but then keeps a steady, pounding rhythm.
What are you going to do? The manager wants to see
me!, you say wishing you could take the exclamation
point off the end of that sentence and replace it with a
question mark. You could hide, but that would be
childish. You could run away, but that would show fear.
Take my advice. Heres what you should do. You should
walk calmly to the G.M.s office and rip the leg off the
M on the little G.M. sign on the wall beside the door
to his office. That way you can just go to your cubicle
secure in the knowledge that you now have an excuse
for not obeying and going to see him. - All I could see
was a G.N. sign on the door, so I assumed you had
moved to a different office. I knew I was supposed to
see the General Manager, not the General Nanager.
Tone Hint: When you imagine ripping the leg off of the
M, thrown it down to the ground to remember the 4th
tone, the falling tone.

22

Character:
Pinyin: do
Sounds like: endow
English: to arrive
Memory Hook: When my mother brought me into this
world, when I first arrived, I was endowed with many
gifts.
Tone Hint: Thats what your mother told you? We all
know what she really meant was that when you first
arrived she accidentally dropped you on the ground.
Oops!

23

Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin:
Sounds like:
Literally:
English:

jin do
G endow
see arrive
to see

Explanation: Why do we use see and arrive together

here? Well, in this phrase, the do gives it a bit of a
past tense feel. It is kind of like saying to have arrived
at seeing.

24

Character:
Pinyin: hn
Sounds like: honey
English: very
Memory Hook: Honey is very sweet.
Tone Hint: You need to use your imagination to make
this one stick (no pun intended). Perhaps you can
imagine your head hanging down low by the toilet. You
ate too much very sweet honey and now you are very
sick.

25

Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin:
Sounds like:
Literally:
English:

goxng
gouge shingles
high excitement
happy, in a cheerful mood

Memory Hook: You are sick again, but this time you
have adult chickenpox or shingles. The doctor says not
to scratch but you know deep down that the only thing
that is going to put you in a cheerful mood is for you
to gouge your shingles with one of your leftover
chopsticks. Imagine how good it will feel to scratch that
itch.
Tone Hint: The tones of this word aptly describe what
would really happen if you scratch your itch. Sure, your
are on a brief high at first, but the ensuing pain drops
you back down in the dumps. Was it worth it?

26

Character:
Pinyin: y
Sounds like: Yesterday OR Yellow Submarine
English: also, too
Memory Hook: Your grandpa forgot the words to
Yesterday, by the Beatles.
Sing it grandpa!:
Yesterday. Also my troubles seemed so faraway.
Also, I know that that they are here to stay.
Oh, I believe in yesterday, too.
Encore!:
We also live in a yellow submarine.
A yellow submarine.
A yellow submarine, too.
Tone Hint: It is all fun and games when he sings it at
home, but when grandpa showed up at your school
singing the Beatles in front of all your friends, your
head hung low.

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Knee Howdy

Character:
Pinyin: sh
Sounds like: sure
English: to be (includes all the forms of
to be: is, are, am, etc.)
Memory Hook: Imagine this dialog of a husband and
wife:
Wife: Am I pretty?
Husband: Sure.
Wife: Are you in love with me?
Husband: Sure.
Wife: Is sure all you have to say me? Do you
even want to be my husband?
Husband: Sure.
Tone Hint: A sharp clapping sound echos through the
kitchen as the wife slaps her hand across her husbands
face.

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