A Different Kind of Struggle 2/11/2010 1:13 PM

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Wednesday, February 10,2010

A Different Kind of Struggle Find eg: arts, music, happy hour

LGBT seniors open up about their semi-invisible lives

By Ryan McClendon
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“Gigi” is 68 years old and lives

in Northern Kentucky, where
she moved five years ago after
living in Cincinnati since the
1990s. She runs a small
business in the community and
enjoys her life very much.

And like many women her age,

she is discreet about her
sexuality. But this isn’t a result
of modesty alone. Gigi is a
male-to-female transgender —
she’s had facial feminization
surgeries and breast implants
— and relies upon her own
discretion in order to keep her
livelihood intact and herself
safe.

“I live my life without walking

around with a sign on my
back,” she says. “I just don’t
feel the need to tell everyone in
my neighborhood.”

Gigi is also active within

Cincinnati’s LGBT community.
She’s an outreach associate for CrossPort, a transgender and transvestite support group in
Cincinnati that hosts monthly meetings and frequent outings. She travels to schools and police
departments to discuss transsexual issues as well as recruit for Cross- Port.

Having transitioned to female at 57, Gigi understands the struggle of coming out later in life. She
says there are many elderly transgendered people in Cincinnati, but many of them are still
closeted.

“If they’re not out by age 65, they’re probably never going to come out,” she says.

CrossPort, however, might actually serve a dual purpose for Gigi. Although it’s open to all ages (its
youngest member is 22), about 60 of its roughly 150 members are above the age of 55, making
CrossPort the de facto elderly trans organization in Cincinnati, keeping her in contact with not only
her trans friends but people in her own age group.

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A Different Kind of Struggle 2/11/2010 1:13 PM

Gigi’s story is microcosm of a larger societal issue that often goes unnoticed in Greater Cincinnati:
The plight of the gay elderly. While Gigi has a wide swath of friends, young and old, there is no
dedicated place for her to commune exclusively with the LGBT people her own age.

Prime Time players

Cincinnati offers a wide range of social groups for older people, but there are no LGBT-exclusive Digital Version [page by page]
organizations. Many groups simply have a large population of older LGBT clientele, such as
CrossPort, New Spirit Metropolitan Community Church and Prime Timers.

Prime Timers, a social club for men, might be the closest thing to a senior gay men’s group in
Cincinnati. A chapter of the international Prime Timers Worldwide, the group advertises itself as
place for older gay and bisexual men and the younger men who admire them.

Steve Howell, 44, a native Cincinnatian, has been treasurer of Prime Timers for three years.
Although the club is open to heterosexual men, the majority of Prime Timers are gay.

“It is a place where men can come and socialize amongst other people,” Howell says. “They can
actually be themselves and not have to worry about someone seeing them, and they can mingle
with their own kind.”

Cincinnati’s is the third largest Prime Timers group in the nation, with 280 members, and the Cincinnati CityBeat on Facebook
group holds regular monthly meetings. The larger group is also broken up into several smaller You are a Fan
groups based on interests, and those groups typically meet weekly. Dining groups, athletic groups
and theater groups are among the many choices that Prime Timers offers. Cincinnati CityBeat "Burwinkel, 27,
could be like any number of job seekers
Though a majority of Prime Timers are gay, they’re not necessarily out, Howell adds.
in the Tristate, except for one thing: His
record includes a theft conviction, a
“There are a lot of guys that grew up in a different environment and are afraid of gay people,” he
crime for which he served about three
says. “There’s still a lot of fear.”
months in jail.
Prime Timers’ mission is to reach out to these closeted elderly men, but that’s about as easy as Case Closed on
chasing a shadow. Expungements
www.citybeat.com
“It’s been a challenge for us because we don’t always know where all the older men are,” Howell Jasen Burwinkel is having a
tough time. The Northside
says. “They think it’s all about sex. That’s what a lot of people think ... dirty old men having sex. resident works a part-time
That’s not what we are there for.” job and says he&rs,News
Yesterday at 4:46pm
Another reason older gay men have trouble attending social groups like Prime Timers is as
common among the elderly population as a whole — mobility. Cincinnati CityBeat LunaFest is
rescheduled. We'd imagine a lot of other
“I would say maybe a third that have mobility issues,” Howell says. “We have guys that come with
things are too. Here's a link to the
walkers, guys that are on oxygen and guys that can barely walk.” Lunafest info and a link to WCPO's latest
Cincinnati CityBeat has 2,258 Fans
Howell says social groups geared toward the elderly are necessary because often older LGBTers
are dismissed in the larger gay culture. “They forget about them,” he says. “I think it’s just (an
attitude of) the younger generation are in it for themselves.”
Phil Amy Ann Teresa Jonada

Visibility still a problem

Gay elderly visibility isn’t just a Cincinnati issue — it’s a national problem.
Tina Lynn Lou Dave Eric
Karen Taylor is director of outreach and education with SAGE (Services & Advocacy for Gay,
Bisexual, Lesbian and Transgender Elders), the nation’s oldest nonprofit advocacy organization Cincinnati CityBeat on Facebook

that assists elderly LGBT Americans. Many of the services, benefits and entitlements available to
CityBeatCincy
seniors are largely unknown to the older gay community, she says.
CityBeatCincy
“What happens in reality at the local level is that LGBT older adults are invisible,” Taylor says. The
programs serving seniors don’t serve them effectively, she adds, because many attempt to treat 'A Different Kind Of Stuggle' - LGBT seniors
open up about their semi-invisible lives in our
everyone the same and don’t take the vagaries of sexual orientation into ac count when providing latest report - http://short.to/16xu8
care. 2 hours ago

Once a person turns 60, benefits and entitlements change. Many gay community centers don’t If you're in Wyoming (the neighborhood, not
the state), check out Half Day Cafe for lunch.
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may not be aware of how to do that work,” Taylor says. about 1 hour ago

The LGBT social strata are the lifeblood of gay seniors because often they don’t have the reliable 'Walking Away' - Read Larry Gross' insightful
account of a relationship gone wrong in his
family network that heterosexual seniors have. Two-thirds of gay seniors live alone, and 90 percent
Join the conversation
of them don’t have children. For most elderly people, spouses and children are the aging
population means of staying social and getting services.

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A Different Kind of Struggle 2/11/2010 1:13 PM

population means of staying social and getting services.

“That’s who our aging service system rely on to provide basic assistance at home,” Taylor says. “If
we have a population that doesn’t fit the criteria, it means just walking in the door of a senior
center where someone says, ‘What’s your wife’s name?’ is immediately a barrier to access.”

History’s lingering effects

Cincinnati LGBT Center Vice President John Maddux, 60, says there’s definitely a lack of social
support in the fabric of the LGBT community. He currently doesn’t participate in many activities
geared for seniors but spends time with friends exploring personal interests.

Maddux, who’s also an English professor at the University of Cincinnati, takes a more
philosophical approach to why gay men don’t participate in these groups.

“I think it’s a sociological phenomenon,” Maddux says. “(The 1950s was) an era when men
couldn’t come out, you lived in the shadows. We were all so socialized in a culture where men
had to compete with each other rather than nurture each other. I don’t think we really know how to
be a part of each others’ lives other than either sexually or in a competitive sense.”

Part of the problem is passivity on the part of institutional structure, Maddux adds. There isn’t
enough outreach by gay organizations to their elderly constituents, specifically on the part of the
local Center. Other than the annual Pride Parade and the Pride Night at King’s Island amusement
park, he says, the Center’s presence in the community has been minimal.

“I would say that our outreach is pretty pathetic,” Maddux says. “The center has to rediscover
itself, to redefine itself. We need to ask ‘How can we serve you?’ ”

Michael Chanak, board member-at-large for the LBGT Center, is an anomaly all his own. At 60,
he’s an apt jumper through ageseparated social castes of Cincinnati’s gay community. He uses
social media to keep up with friends, young and old, and to keep tuned in to Cincinnati’s varied
gay world.

“Most of the people in my age group, they’re just not using those things,” Chanak says. “I’ve
always been really successful. I’ve been able to have friends and do pretty well for myself. Some
are more sensitive to the age issue, especially people in my age group.”

While he wouldn’t mind a social group of people closer to his age, it isn’t a high priority for him.

“I’ve just become well-socialized,” Chanak says. “I don’t feel particularly isolated and my health is
still decent enough that I don’t have any disability that limits my (activity).”

Chanak says many of his elderly gay friends have mobility issues that limit their sociability. But for
him, he’s still able and still knows how to work a room.

“I’m either a stubborn crazy person or just determined that I’m going to make my way,” he says.
“I’m just happy that I got this far.”

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