Ramadhan

Reflections
1436/2015

Abdul-Qaadir Abdul-Khaaliq
Washington, DC

Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem

Alhamdulillah was salaat was salaam alaa Rasoolillaah wa bad:
What follows is a collection of reflections that were initially just an idea I had for myself to be sure to give some
serious thought or consideration to life each day throughout the month of Ramadhan. These reflections may be
triggered by events or just something that came up or something that was long brewing and stewing that I
decided to let out. It could also serve as a sort of record of how I was thinking at the time. Years from now, if not
sooner, I may see things very differently and the contrast may prove interesting, wallaahu alam.
Of course many thoughts run through ones mind, so the greater task became not reflection itself but which
reflection to actually take time to write down. The thought came to mind to share these reflections with my
immediate family just as a daily reminder and communication even if for some reason we did not actually
engage in extensive conversation, and indeed that happens. It seems wrong that those closest to you dont
know what is on your mind or would make incorrect assumptions even though they know you well. It is a
consequence of communication where people do not talk to or around one another even if they are in close
quarters.
Then somehow the notion came to actually share some of the reflections with a few other people whom I either
do not see often nor have a chance to actually converse with, and who I imagined may find the reflections
interesting as well as perhaps letting them in on a side of myself that I dont often have an opportunity to share.
The thoughts are decidedly Islamically or Muslim directed. This of course had the effect of forcing me to edit
myself and think what would not just be of personal benefit, but hopefully food for thought and possible benefit
to others. I later decided to just post them all on my Facebook account, which frankly I basically use more or less
like a fancy bookmarker to track interesting articles, versus a lot of social contact and interchange with friends
and family. People dont even know I have a Facebook account and may find it surprising. I hardly have any
Facebook friends or accept any Facebook invitations and am not sure about the benefit or healthiness of
people sharing every little thought or activity in their lives.
The reflections tended to get longer deeper into the month and I felt almost committed to finish. Just putting
things in writing makes for clarity in some ways and certainly prevents the interruption of thought that may
occur in an immediate exchange or veering off into something else. Finally, one can take what is written not as a
commentary on them personally or their views but simply the musings of yours truly, about which they are
under no obligation to comment or react.
May Allah accept it and forgive me if anything is inappropriate or in error.
Akhookum

Reflection #1: What is the real value of fasting to us if we continue to openly sin during the days
and nights of Ramadhan especially? We know the hadeeth referring to this issue where one is just
going hungry and thirsty. How to convince such an individual who blatantly sins that doing so is
counter to the purpose of fasting? We do not want to say, "Don't fast if you are going to keep doing
such and such!" right?
Reflection #2: How seriously would a person be taken who says they are an environmentalist as
they dump garbage in a stream? What about someone who claims they are dieting as they down a
large Coke and a glazed jelly donut? What of the person who "works out" by sitting on the couch
listening to tunes and playing video games? Then how seriously should the Muslim be taken who
skips salaawaat, or looks lustfully at the opposite sex, disrespects their parents and abandons established Islamic
practices and habits, yet fasts during the days of Ramadhan?
Reflection #3: If we look at others and think of how and why they do or say something that seems
so obviously wrong to us as far as Islam goes, do we ever imagine that such is exactly how someone
out there sees us?
Reflection #4: While Islam shares the same linguistic root as 'peace', following Islam and being a
Muslim specifically means consciously and willingly submitting one's self, desires, and ego by
subordinating those personal desires and obeying Allah and doing so with sincerity and intending to
please Him alone. That cannot be done without obedience to His Messenger Muhammad
sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam. That's a mouthful. Defining Islam as 'peace' is easier, but we will not achieve peace
unless we live according to that complete meaning.
Reflection #5: If you pray taraweeh or qiyaam in an area where the imaam reads from the heart
and has excellent recitation with a sonorous voice, he adheres to the prophetic sunnah, meaning he
does not rush the recitation nor cut it short, and you can follow that imam from the start to the end
of his witr, and he makes even standing for an entire juz seem easy to absorb and you are in a clean
and comfortable masjid with a large respectful congregation, know that you are probably in an exceptional
situation. Do NOT take it for granted
Reflection #6: The attached video is over a year old (https://youtu.be/QT6HrwFR93o). You will find
a series of these types of videos where a child or any person is pulled out alive after a major
disaster. Nevertheless, reflect as we sit or eat or read safely and comfortably and possess the
technology to see such a thing and reflect.
Reflection #7: Isn't Ramadhan the time to stop justifying our shortcomings or continuing willful
blindness to them? Ex. I don't read Qur'aan because I was forced to as a child; I don't always pray
because so many religious people pray who are hypocritical and you don't need to be religious to be
good; I can't pray at work or school because I will be seen as extreme and so on. Do we really want guidance or
do we think ourselves above it? Let's be honest with ourselves before Allah Al-'Aleem in Ramadhan or our
fasting may simply be an exercise in discipline and meaningless adherence to 'tradition'.

Reflection #7.5: People are like plants. If you water and nurture them but keep them in a small pot, the beauty
you once enjoyed and admired will fade, the leaves become withered, little new growth that comes out small.
You can keep pulling the dead leaves but it will not improve because the plant has become 'root bound'. It needs
to be replanted and put in fertile soil with enough room to grow to its fullest. Sorry to go all Mr. Nyagi on you!
Reflection #8: When we look around and think 'Islam isn't working or else there why are the
Muslims and Muslim countries in such chaos? If ISIS is any indication of an Islamic State, then no
way!' we are missing several major points. One: While being Muslim, how many are really
practicing Islam? Two: Muslims suffer from a loss of connection with sound and well delivered
Islamic knowledge on the whole. Three: It takes not only sound knowledge but solid infrastructure for any state
to properly function. Four: Why are we basing our practice of Islam on what someone else is or is not doing and
not really facing up to what what WE are or are not doing?
Reflection #9: When I lived in a desert, I complained and disliked the oppressive heat and
pervasive dust. It was so hot I questioned why any humans would inhabit such a place and
wondered how they even settled there! How did they survive before the invention of air
conditioning? The forecast was almost invariably, 'hot, dry and sunny'. I longed for grass, trees,
green and seasonal change. Now I live where it regularly rains, trees are abundant and my yard is full of thick
grass that I worry about maintaining and it takes a lot of time and effort to do so! Cats do their thing, insects
abound, shrubbery is growing wildly and I long for a clear, dry sunny day to get the work done. In the first place I
was surrounded by masaajid and believers, albeit imperfect and with multifarious issues, but Islam was
prevalent, open and established in the land. In the second place, the believers are sparse and I am surrounded
by everything other than masaajid. Kufr and shirk is well established and we are faced with constant moral
corruption, and practices that are nearly the polar opposite to Islam are the norm so much so Muslims are right
up in it and do not or cannot even make distinctions and blend right in. Appreciate what you have.
Reflection #10: Have you ever been making your way back from taraweeh or qiyaamul-layl or
going to or from Fajr at the masjid, and despite being very early or late in the wee hours there is
traffic and activity on the streets? You see people just coming back home from partying on the
weekend, and sometimes clearly inebriated, stumbling, talking to themselves or doing something
very degrading and undignified. Sometimes as you are going in to the masjid they are going into or coming out
of a nightclub or bar. Does that make you think 'What a waste and loss' about those people? Or perhaps 'I thank
Allah for saving me from that' or maybe 'That's so sad. Na'oothu billaah'? Maybe instead of looking down on
such people and merely feeling disgust, we should feel a longing and desire for their guidance as we feel we are
guided. If you read the seerah, you will see this was the feeling of Muhammad sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam
towards his people whom he similarly noticed were misguided and lost.
Reflection #11: Can there be any doubt in the mind of any clear thinking Muslim with correct
'aqeedah that to consider any body of judges who rule in absolute contradiction to what Allah has
revealed as Supreme is disbelief in what was revealed to Muhammad sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam?
Can following one's own desires and rationale and divorcing them from revelation be in any way
considered eemaan? What more is needed to prove that reliance on ones intellect alone is insufficient? Muslims
who do not submit to the clear orders and prohibitions of the sources of Islam and instead put what they or
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others think or feel before the Qur'aan and authentic Sunnah are the first who need the benefits of this month.
Oh Allah grant us humility and sincerity to benefit from Ramadhan, aameen.
Reflection #12: There is nothing more enjoyable than standing behind an imam who recites the
Qur'aan giving each letter and aayah its full due with a nice voice as well. It impacts the heart
favorably and is a cause of increase in eemaan. It causes one to cringe when it is clear that the
imaam is not careful or unaware or unable to follow tajweed rules or has an off pitch tone. That
has a marring impact. Some of that may stem from a bit of excessive compulsiveness or even being a former
musician. Nevertheless, it is even greater joy to be able to read and recite the Qur'aan for one's self and even
more to be able to appreciate the meaning and consider it. There is a video of people in a certain country
literally flying through the taraweeh. It was unreal and even comical but ultimately saddening. How could that
happen? It is not possible to reflect or understand when one is not even giving the salaat its due. It was pure
ritual motion. It is better that one reflect seriously one hour in Ramadhan on the Qur'an than pray the whole of
it in that manner, and sometimes one needs to pray on their own with full concentration than standing in a big
congregation with no understanding. One however has to be able to even read at all first. Thank Allah if you can
and thank Him and learn how if you can't. You may sweat and stumble and even be embarrassed at first, but the
reward will be tremendous.
Reflection #13: Just reflecting on how the Sunnah restricts and the Qur'aan is a witness for or
against us. This is why some of us abandon one or both, or try to reinterpret them to suit our
inclinations. We will find all types of excuses and 'red herrings' as justification for our actions or
lack thereof. 'I don't have to be religious to be righteous', 'Religious people think they are better
than others' 'It's just Sunnah and not fardh' and on and on. Can we stop and be honest with ourselves in
Ramadhan? If we believe Allah has guided us to love both the Quran and Sunnah, to understand what that
means and adhere to them, we should thank Him and be humble, patient and want the same for others and
never feel assured or guaranteed Jannah (that we are or will remain on that path) or we will become complacent
and arrogant.
Reflection #14: If we get angry at a Muslim who is clearly recognizable as one while we aren't or
feel annoyed at a Muslim who stops to make salaat in public, or are embarrassed to use Arabic
phrases in public such as 'alhamdulillah', 'subhaanallah' or even a clear 'as-salaamu 'alaikum', or
feel accused if a Muslim asks us if we can read the Qur'aan, or feel upset to be asked what
masjid we go to, or cringe when a Muslim mentions an aayat or hadeeth in conversation with us and certainly in
a mixed crowd, or apologetic for and condemning of a Muslim who adheres to practices like not shaking the
hand of the opposite sex, not listening to music, lowering their gaze, avoiding free mixing and so forth then
know it is we who are deserving of anger, truly annoying, embarrassing, guilty, cause of upset, cringe worthy,
and who need to apologize and deserving condemnation. It is we who should correct our behavior to conform to
Islam rather than hoping it conforms to our whims. Ramadhan is the time to do it. Allah is forgiving and
acceptant of the penitent slave and can quickly put us on another path if we are sincere.
Reflection #15: O Messenger (Muhammad)! Let not those who hurry to fall into disbelief grieve
you, of such who say: "We O Messenger (Muhammad)! Let not those who hurry to fall into disbelief
grieve you, of such who say: "We believe" with their mouths but their hearts have no faith. And of
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the Jews are men who listen much and eagerly to lies - listen to others who have not come to you. They change
the words from their places; they say, "If you are given this, take it, but if you are not given this, then beware!"
And whomsoever Allah wants to put in Al-Fitnah [error, because of his rejecting the Faith], you can do nothing for
him against Allah. Those are the ones whose hearts Allah does not want to purify (from disbelief and hypocrisy);
for them there is a disgrace in this world, and in the Hereafter a great torment." with their mouths but their
hearts have no faith. And of the Jews are men who listen much and eagerly to lies - listen to others who have not
come to you. They change the words from their places; they say, "If you are given this, take it, but if you are not
given this, then beware!" And whomsoever Allah wants to put in Al-Fitnah [error, because of his rejecting the
Faith], you can do nothing for him against Allah. Those are the ones whose hearts Allah does not want to purify
(from disbelief and hypocrisy); for them there is a disgrace in this world, and in the Hereafter a great torment. S.
Al-Maa-idah 41
There is too much in this verse to comment on. Its up to you to read the tafseer. It does however coincide with
something I was already reflecting on. Namely, you can't MAKE people do anything despite how you feel about
them. You can't MAKE someone who has or knows the Qur'aan understand it or implement it. You can't MAKE
someone who claims or feigns faith act according to it. Even the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam couldn't. We
grieve and lament and feel turmoil to see when someone is going headlong towards a bad end, however it is
really not up to us. We can preach day and night, long and hard. If a person's heart isn't right, it will not benefit
them. They shut you out, turn off and you can't shout them into compliance. Allah guides whom He wills, not
whom you love. You just pray that whom He wills to guide and whom you love coincide. Remember them in
Ramadhan.
Reflection #16: And from those who call themselves Christians, We took their covenant, but they
have abandoned a good part of the Message that was sent to them. So We planted amongst
them enmity and hatred till the Day of Resurrection (when they discarded Allah's Book, disobeyed
Allah's Messengers and His Orders and transgressed beyond bounds in Allah's disobedience), and
Allah will inform them of what they used to do. Q5:14
When I read ayaat like this I tend not to think "See there! Those kaafirs are astray" but rather, "Look how we
Muslims are going down the same path! Why haven't we learned the lessons from those who went before us?"
What are we doing when we abandon the Qur'aan or take part of it and discard the rest? Look at the chaos and
division amongst us! Look at the rancor and hatred between us! Look at the disdain we feel for one another
while we claim to be following the haqq! Is it because we ARE following the Book or because we are heedless of
it's lessons, guidance and wisdom and negligent of the practices and character we are enjoined to adhere to and
uphold that are within it? If you do read the Book with sincerity and reflect and are a true believer, you know
the answer.
Reflection #17: When do we stop blaming someone or something else for our behavior, especially
for our disobedience to Allah? It seems human nature to lay our issues on someone or some
other cause. We can't do something because so and so or such and such said/did this or that
when I was a kid. Or so and so does it and I followed him/her/them. It seems obvious that if we
seek to blame someone or something else that at least we are acknowledging something is wrong in what we
do. It also seems that if we can reflect and lay the blame for our disobedience on a cause, we already have a
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means of getting past it. Otherwise, it becomes an excuse and a fall back, cop out that we have come to rely
upon as a mechanism to exit from responsibility for our own actions, wallahu alam. So the question is when we
lay blame, even if true, must it always cripple us? Allah has sent guidance in the Qur'aan and Sunnah and that it
is a core matter of belief for a Muslim. Sending guidance we could not follow makes no sense. Thus ultimately
we won't have anyone to blame but ourselves.
Reflection #18: Forgiveness is a quality we need to have if we ourselves want it. I am not
thinking of the type of knee-jerk forgiveness that is only superficial or that one does because it
is expected. Nor am I meaning to belittle or imply that not finding forgiveness in one's heart for
all wrongs committed against them to be sinful. What I more realistically think we can strive for
and achieve is rising above the slights and injuries we may endure at the hands or tongues of
others that we really need not allow to hinder us spiritually, emotionally or otherwise. If we can't let some
things go, we probably do more harm to ourselves and maybe even others not even involved than any
satisfaction we get out of holding some past offense over the head of someone who if they remember at all
what they did to us, either could not care less. Moreover, they may have long ago repented and begged Allah for
forgiveness which they may have gotten in Ramadhan...while we are still 'stewing' in our own misery. Who in
that case is the loser and who among us has not said or done something either knowingly or unknowingly that
may have hurt or offended someone else? Allah forgive us, aameen
Reflection #19: How have practices and beliefs become ingrained and widespread in so many
Muslim cultures that have nothing to do with Islam or the practices and worship of Muhammad
sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam or his companions radhiallahu 'anhum? It is a long story but on a
simple personal scale, how many times have we seen people do something that makes us
scratch our heads and we said nothing, did not ask about it nor did we know any evidence for or
against it? How many times have we heard people make statements about Islam that we feel or even know are
not right and off-base but really could not refute with any solid proof? How many times have we been where
someone comes up with what sounds like a great idea that impacts the worship or practice of the Muslims but
no one really has a basis for it from any precedent or established principal? In fact, how many times have people
just acted based on how they felt about something versus what they knew or were certain of from the authentic
sources of Islam? How many people even think to apply the principle in Islam of acting only after gaining sound
knowledge? It takes time and effort to gain knowledge. It takes humility to accept that one needs knowledge
and does not know everything. However, arrogance is widespread and we feel we don't have to listen to anyone
but ourselves and those who agree with us and how we feel and what we think takes precedence over all other
considerations. We seem to miss the entire point of what it means to be Muslim. Let's ask for humility and
knowledge in our duaas in these last few days of Ramadhan.
Reflection #20: I wonder if this will be my last publicly shared reflection? The point of this was to
record at least one useful reflection of the days of Ramadhan, more so for myself than anyone
else. I just decided to share them with the few people I have even accepted or left on this forum.
I long ago stopped thinking what I had to say made much difference to folks. I also tend to
use this thing as a bookmarker more so than a social network which I know its inventor didn't
intend. I have rejected, ignored and "un-friended" a slew of folks and family mainly because I don't have time
and even with the few who remain, the amount of stuff posted is overwhelming. Now in the last 10 days and
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nights of Ramadhan it is bad enough I have work to do and can't remain in itikaaf. Do I need to look at cat
videos and other sundry clips and posts or drastically increase focus on the Book of Allah?
Reflection #21: O Prophet, fear Allah and do not obey the disbelievers and the hypocrites. Indeed,
Allah is ever Knowing and Wise. And follow that which is revealed to you from your Lord. Indeed
Allah is ever, with what you do, acquainted. And rely upon Allah ; and sufficient is Allah as
Disposer of affairs. Q.33:1-3
By extension so are we so ordered as his followers. Why do we imitate and desire other than this and follow the
guidance of other than that which is in the revelation? Why do we keep listening and following those who did
not give the Qur'aan or the Sunnah any weight? Could we be more astray than we when we do that?
Reflection #22: It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger have
decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allah
and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed in a plain error. Q. 33:36
Those who convey the Message of Allah and fear Him, and fear none save Allah. And Sufficient is
Allah as a Reckoner. Q. 33:39
O Prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to bring down over themselves
[part] of their outer garments. That is more suitable that they will be known and not be abused. And ever is Allah
Forgiving and Merciful. Q. 33:59
There is no more beautiful sign of belief than hijab. There is no more beautiful and dignified appearance than
that of a woman who wears it. It leaves no doubt as to what the Muslimah is about or who she is. Indeed Allah
alone is the judge of the interior of us all and Most Forgiving and Merciful. He certainly knows those women
who are compelled not to wear it from those who are willfully disobedient, ego-tripping, careless, following
erroneous fataawaa and those who are confused and in doubt about it or weak in the face of social pressure.
Nevertheless, it literally pains me to see Muslim women who have put it aside or altered it to the point of
meaninglessness, especially here where the highest emphasis is placed on women's appearance and bodies and
near nakedness is commonplace. I just can' t help it since it has to me since before I ever knew its ruling, been an
outstanding and even inspiring characteristic of the Muslim ummah. Inspiring because it is walking proof of the
courage of Muslim women where men can hide and a non-verbal command to respect her for more than her
looks. The ayaat make clear there is no room or basis to opine that hijab is optional and not mandatory. As far as
choice, indeed we all have a choice to obey and adhere or not. What and Who should we fear most?
Reflection #23: Someone sent me a clip of a popular American da'ee making some
objectionable statements. I don't really like getting into that sort of criticism because it is
fraught with many pitfalls. How many times have we seen it over and over again? Namely,
where some da'ee becomes popular and gets a lot of attention and gets raised up by his
devoted following to the level of scholar and any criticism thereafter is like a declaration of war.
He gets raised up only to be shot down later and betrayed sometimes by his former strongest supporters!

Why does this keep happening? Is it all the da'ee or speaker or just as much those who listen to his or her
da'wah? I say this because it is clear that anyone speaking publicly on Islam will be critiqued and it is also clear
that they will at times make errors. It is also true that we can have an initial impression of someone that turns
out to be very wrong because we don't TRULY know them. We are flawed and shortcoming so we overestimate
and underestimate others all the time.
Where and what is our safeguard? Sincerity (ikhlaas), humility, then sound knowledge that only comes after the
first two and then it must be obtained from solid, sound, established sources and 'ulamaa (scholars) and that
takes time and effort. Taking 'ilm from the students and the up and coming du'aat as a SOURCE is a major
problem, but it is easy to fall into because they are more accessible and it is an understandable shortcut frankly
for most people who are not going to devote themselves to the pursuit of knowledge nor have the ability to do
so.
The best of the speakers and callers are those who refer to their sources and a red flag should go up in our
heads when the speaker seems mostly to refer to none other than himself or someone few have even heard of.
We are still taking a chance if WE don't know who or what a sound source is and are basically dependent on
others to tell us! It is a trial of our age of 24 hour connectivity that anybody, me included, can spout off at the
mouth and keyboard with no restriction any time and as much as they want to. May Allah protect us, aameen.
Reflection #24: I ate something that is having negative effects. I made it through salaat okay but
it is taking time to wear off. Now that is not a complaint. I chose what I ate and it was not
unwholesome or spoiled but has a certain effect on the digestion I should have expected. I
somehow put aside the risk and forgot or rationalized eating it or the amount I did and now I am
paying for it.
Now as an analogy when we put some things into our heads, it also has an effect on us, especially the heart and
we probably realize it is risky or liable to have negative effects but we rationalize doing so. We use our eyes to
take in whatever it is and we take the time to intellectually or emotionally digest it and can feel the effects or
manifest them in some way such as our behavior or speech.
Our Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said what means, "Have true shyness before Allah...true shyness is to
protect the head and what goes in it and to protect the stomach and what goes in it." How can a Muslim then lay
eyes on what is haraam, or listen to it or speak it and not care whether what they eat is halaal or haraam? Think
of all the time spent listening to and learning the latest rap or pop song, watching the latest movies, reading the
novel or other books and sites filled with ideas, morals and beliefs totally contrary to Islam vs learning our deen
from sound texts or solid teachers, reading what will lift up our hearts and purify our souls, especially the
Qur'aan or remembering Allah on our tongues and speaking about that which is beneficial from or about our
deen! Indeed, some of us would prefer anything other than to talk or read or hear about the deen! How can this
be? Basically because of what I just described and one thing leads to another. As the programmers say, "garbage
in, garbage out". If we turn away from ayaat telling us how our organs and the Qur'aan will testify against us on
Yaum Al-Qiyaamah, it doesn't make it any less a reality.

Reflection #25: Can there be any doubt that the key reason for our going astray is lack of
satisfaction with what Allah has revealed in the Qur'aan and Sunnah? At some point due to lack
of ikhlaas, arrogance or even ignorance someone just could not completely submit to Allah's
guidance through His Messenger sallallaahu ' alaihi wa sallam so they either refused to do it or
stopped doing it, and perhaps influenced others who followed them in that. They wanted
something more or something else that the sunnah would not give them. No one spoke up or did anything and
after time passed the hatred of the wrong even left the hearts. Those who were obeying the Messenger
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam were stopped or discouraged from doing so and over time desires and caprice
supplanted the sunnah. We made excuses, rationalized our actions and our cultures or family history or national
traditions became more important, even if whatever was in them contradicted the sunnah. We became weaker
and could no longer stand against the trends and misdirection of the corrupt and insincere. Even being educated
in Deen became something rare and those who had the weakest academic aptitude were relegated to religious
studies and so such became looked down upon. We became corrupted by wealth and worldy considerations and
fear of humans supplanted fear of Allah. Is there any doubt that the only thing that will return this ummah to its
place of honor, is the same thing that gave it honor in the first place?
Reflection #26: This week I came across a man outside of the retail store where I was so blessed
to be able to buy a new pair of shoes. He looked pretty young and while it is always sad to see
anyone begging or homeless, somehow to see a young man doing so brings many issues to mind.
His nails were long and I realized he was a big and tall man. I saw that he was literally bursting out
of his shoes. They were in tatters.
Many people living in the streets of America are coming off alcohol or substance abuse problems and cannot
hold or qualify for a job, many are suffering from mental health issues, and some are physically disabled. A
segment are pushed into the streets due to purely financial reasons. Many Americans are one paycheck away
from the street and if they don't get it, they have to go to shelters that are often unsafe and thus prefer to take
their chances on the street, living in cars, in lots, crashing with friends or family if they have any until their
generosity runs out. Whole families find themselves in this condition. It seems so incredible in a country where a
man can be paid $29 million dollars a year to play a ball game or where someone gets a trophy for stuffing
themselves with hotdogs, burgers, chicken wings or pies.
I decided to actually talk to this man and treat him like a human being and ask him about himself. He was
reluctant of course to reveal his business to a perfect stranger, but then again, he was already terribly exposed
to the world. I just did not want to toss him some change and walk away. He told me he is homeless and faced
some "problems". How far could I really delve considering I have no real resources other than possibly pointing
or taking him to a shelter? I through to myself, "I can do without these shoes while he has not even a decent
pair" so I asked his size. He said 18! Such shoes are impossible to just pick up from a store. They can be ordered
online. I asked him his name. When he told me it broke my heart more...he was a Muslim.
Oh Allah let us not forget people like this in these last days of Your blessed month, nor thereafter, aameen.
Forgive us for our greed and complacency, aameen. Bless us to act beneficially beyond just feeling sorry and sad,
aameen.

Reflection #27: Sometimes we need help to see joy or goodness amidst so much misery. How
does one keep from allowing so much bad news from weighing them down in a quagmire of
cynicism and depression? It is so easy to be negative as the list of what is wrong is long. One can
also delude themselves into thinking they are the only ones suffering or even noticing the wrongs
in this world. Ramadhan is a time to reflect upon the meanings of Allah's Revelation as opposed to swirling
downwards into the dark hole of one's thoughts. It is the Qur'aan indeed that brings tranquility to the hearts.
How can we achieve that?
We have to be humble and cognizant of our limitations and perhaps we will realize how little control we have.
We must admit how much we must depend on Allah and therefore beg Him for guidance, wisdom, courage and
strength. We must believe in His ultimate wisdom and certain power to change any condition as He pleases. Let
us beg for His Mercy upon us and all those who are oppressed, living in poverty, facing abuse and torture,
wrongly accused and convicted, ameen. Forgive us and forgive the believers and bless us to forgive one another,
ameen.
Reflection #28: Thank You Allah for giving us yet another opportunity to gain Your Grace and
Mercy despite the prayers we were late for, the food we wasted or overate, the unnecessary or
inappropriate speech, the time wasted watching TV or being on Facebook, looking a little too long
at something we should have lowered our gazes from, losing our tempers and being impatient,
not reflecting on Your Book, or not being completely humbled and grateful for the uncountable blessings and
favors You have bestowed on us while so many go without. Most of all we thank you for the immeasurable
blessing and privilege of being Muslim and can only hope to be truly considered as such by You, not worrying
about the opinion of us of any of Your creatures before You. Please accept any good we have done of ibaadah
and righteous work during this month, aameen.
Reflection #29 (last entry): On the last night I was at a masjid for Qiyaam and we
shared suhoor and were waiting for the adhaan of Fajr. A youth came up to me who I
have known for many years. He has shown symptoms of a condition that is called
Asperger's Syndrome which is a mild form of autism. Now I am not a doctor but what I
know about this syndrome in the course of working with many children and reading
some, is that people who have this have difficulty with some social skills such as not reading facial cues
and being very blunt and unfiltered and inability to understand subtleties in speech or mannerisms such
as sarcasm. They may say or ask something very bluntly or get right up in someone's face or continually
go on about something. They may just as well abruptly start or stop a conversation or turn off instantly.
It can be very awkward to say the least. There is another interesting observation, namely people like
that rarely lie and are guileless and thus are prone to being taken advantage of. Finally, their take on the
world around them can be very different as their perceptions and filters are very different. All the above
can at times be a boon or a major bust in certain situations.
As you can imagine, this can make school life very difficult and certainly socialization a major task in
general for such a person. Very hard to make friends and even become the butt of jokes and ridicule and
pranks. They may or may not know they are being "punked" and can be very deeply emotionally hurt of
course. Sometimes they can be very sensitive to others and not always sure when someone is being
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genuine, whether rude or nice towards them. Everybody will not take such a person like this young man
- who is very tall by the way and could be intimidating to someone who does not know him approaching them well and will construe them as being rude or clueless and thus react rudely. These
souls can indeed be "off-putting" to others but they do not realize that at all and do not intentionally
mean to be so and so they have to be coached and guided and even then it is hard for them. I know all
this, but it is still often hard to know how to respond or react or direct such a person, especially if you
are not always around one another. I taught this young man for a few years and learned how to deal
with him in general. He has matured but still has this sort of demeanor, if you will.
Now here's the punchline after all that intro. This young person came to me and said, "You know I
always wanted to ask you: Are you white or black?"! Now of all the questions I have ever heard in my
entire 50 plus years on this earth, THAT was never even remotely one of them! Nor could I imagine how
ANYONE, at least not in the USA would have any doubt about my particular race classification. Anyone
who knows me, and knows what I look like, knows what I am talking about. I mean I am not exactly Colin
Powell or an ambiguous sort of physical appearance but you may not be able to tell what tribe for sure!
However, the question intrigued me intensely so I asked, "Why do you ask? Would it make any
difference as to how you deal with me?" He said, "No I was just wanted to know for my own
information." I said, "Well why is it important and what difference would it make?"
By the way, I know some people sitting nearby heard all this and thought I was being particularly rude or
evasive but I had a reason in mind. I do have a bad habit of being sarcastic but hopefully not caustic and
I resist the urge to 'ding' people. They may have even thought I had a problem with being what I
obviously am (at least I thought so up until this conversation), but I have no issue at all with that and feel
no shame or real hesitancy to identify myself according to the racial classification under which I belong.
This young man had sparked something though. I even asked him, "You really don't know do you? You
are unique. I am not saying that is a bad thing, but you are unique." He really had no clue. He was
getting ethnicity and nationality and race all mixed up as though knowing I was from Washington, DC
would have confirmed me as a particular race versus if I had said I was from Morocco or Saudi Arabia. I
even pointed to a very light skinned brother who is a bona-fide African and asked what race he thought
he was even though he was more African than many in the room.
Anyway, I finally recited the aayat, "Allah created you different people and tribes so that you know one
another. Indeed the most noble of you is those who have the most taqwa." I left him hanging and I know
he felt I was giving him a hard time, and I was, but I was really trying to get him to THINK. He got ME to
thinking for sure. WHY is my race important and does that alone make me who I am? Must I look a
certain way or fit a stereotypical image to be more or less respected or taken more or less seriously? I
declare to you I have no problem telling the world what I consider myself to be as far as a racial
classification and I am very well aware and cognizant of what that means in this world and especially
here in the land where I was born and raised, however, should or do I really HAVE to?

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