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We fly for refuge unto Him (to deliver us) from the mischief of our
minds and from the evil consequences of our actions.
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Oh you who believe! Fear Allah as He has the right to be feared, and
do not die except as Muslims.
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(O you who believe! Keep your duty to Allâh and fear Him, and speak
(always) the truth 70 ز. He will direct you to do righteous good deeds
and will forgive you your sins. And whosoever obeys Allâh and His
Messenger (SAW) he has indeed achieved a great achievement (i.e. he
will be saved from the Hell-fire and made to enter Paradise). [al-
Ahzaab 33:70].” (Sunan al-Nisaa’i: Kitaab al-Jumu’ah, Baab kayfiyyah
al-khutbah).
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On the day of Nahr (in Hajj, the day of Eid), RasulAllah addressed the people
and said, "O people, what day is this?"
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He remained quiet and then he announced, "Verily your blood and your wealth
and your honor is sacred (to one another) as the sacredness of this day, as the
sacredness of this month, as the sacredness of this land." RasulAllah repeated it
over and over, and then he raised his head to the heavens and said, "O Allah,
have I given the message? O Allah, have I given the message" (Bukhari and
Muslim)?
It is from the mercy of Allah that you dealt gently with them. Were you severe or
harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you. So pass over (their
faults), and ask for (Allah's) forgiveness for them, and consult them in the affairs.
Then, when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah, for Allah loves
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those who put their trust (in Him) (A’le- Imran 3/159).
Indeed, the Sahaabaa followed the example of RasulAllah and were described
by the Lord of the Heavens and the Earth as such:
Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah and those who are with him are strong
against unbelievers, (but) compassionate-merciful amongst each other…(Al-Fath
48/ 29).
One of the biggest and evilest wreckers of this compassion, love, and
brotherhood is backbiting. The word in Arabic is gheebah, coming from the root
gha-yaa-baa, meaning that which is unseen. When a Muslim sees his brother or
sister committing a sin, instead of advising the brother or sister directly, the
Muslim goes to others where they are unseen and there they speak ill of the
brother or sister in their absence.
Backbiting is haram; it is one of the major sins and repentance must be sought
for this sin. There is no other opinion in Islam.
RasulAllah said to his companions, "Do you know what gheebah is?"
He said, "It is to mention something about your brother (in his absence) that he
would hate."
He sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said, "If what you said about him is true then you
would have backbitten him, and if it is not true, then you would have slandered
him (buhtaan)" (Muslim).
Look at the severity of the situation and the result of someone who runs after
their Muslim brothers and sisters trying to expose their faults. RasulAllah said:
"O you who have believed with (only) your tongues, yet faith has not yet entered
your hearts! Do not backbite the Muslims. And do not search out their faults. For
verily he who follows the private matters of his Muslim brother, Allah shall follow
his private matters. And whoever has his private matters followed by Allah, Allah
shall expose them even if they were (hiding) in the belly of their home" (Ahmad
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"I have met in this land people that had no faults. But they spent their time finding
faults in others and as time passed, they accumulated their own faults. And I
have met in this land people who had faults. However, they kept silent when it
came to the faults of others, and so as time passed their faults were forgotten!"
O you who believe! Avoid suspicion as much as possible for suspicion in some
cases is a sin. And spy not on each other, nor speak ill of each other behind their
backs. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, you would
abhor it...But fear Allah, for Allah is Oft- Returning, Most Merciful (Al-Hujurat
49/12).
1. Satisfying Anger
This is done by backbiting the person who kindles his anger. So every time this
person makes him angry, he subdues it by backbiting the person. Through this
(the backbiting), he feels he is getting even with the other person.
The cure for this is the advice of the Messenger sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam
when a man came to him and said, “Advise me.”
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RasulAllah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Laa taqhdab (Do not become
angry)!"
To cure this, he must remember the saying of the Messenger sal Allaahu alayhi
wa sallam:
"Whoever seeks the pleasure of men by displeasing Allah, Allah will abandon him
to the people" (Tirmidhi).
This could involve mockery and sarcasm. It is enough to remind those indulging
in this practice of what Allah, the Most High, said:
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may be that the latter are better than the former; Nor let
are better than the former, Nor defame one another, nor insult
(11)
It could very well be that Allah loves them and does not love us.
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A person may become angry because of a sin committed by another person. So,
he talks about it venting his anger and mentioning that person's name instead of
“I was sitting with Iyaas Ibn Mu'aawiyah when a man walked by and I said ill of
that man. ‘Keep quiet!’ Iyaas said to me. ‘Have you fought the Romans?’”
“I said no. He then said, ‘The Romans were saved from you and likewise the
Turk were saved from you. But your own Muslim brother was not saved!’”
This can cause a person to fall into backbiting, because it is easy for such an idle
mind to become busy with men, their honor, and their faults. To correct this, a
person must spend his time in acts of obedience to Allah, worshipping, seeking
Prophet sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said to a man while he was advising him:
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"Take advantage of five matters before five other matters: your youth, before you become old; and your
health, before you fall sick; and your richness, before you become poor; and your free time before you
become busy; and your life, before your death." (Report as musnad by Imam Ahmad)
Such people should think about their own faults and try to correct themselves,
and feel ashamed to criticize others when they have many faults themselves.
It was said to Rabee' Ibn Khaytham, "We never see you finding fault in others."
He replied, "I am not satisfied with myself enough to dedicate my time to finding
faults in others."
He sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Hold your tongue! Make your house
spacious for your guest. And cry over your (own) faults” (Tirmidhi)!
May Allah grace you and us with the blessings of the grand Qurr’an, and
may it benefit us and you with the verses and with wise commemoration, for
He the Almighty is Generous, Noble, Sovereign, Benign, Compassionate,
and Merciful.
PART II
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Abu Bakr once disputed with another companion about a tree. During the
dispute, Abu Bakr said something that he rather would not have said. He did not
curse, he did not attack someone's honor, and he did not poke a fault at anyone.
All he said was something that may have hurt the companion's feelings.
“Say it back to me,” said Abu Bakr, “Or I shall complain to the Messenger of
Allah.”
Abu Bakr went to RasulAllah and told him what had happened and what he said.
RasulAllah called that companion and asked him, “Did Abu Bakr say so-and-so
to you?”
He said, “Yes.”
He, sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said, “What did you reply.”
RasulAllah said, “Good, do not reply it back to him (do not hurt Abu Bakr). Rather
say, ‘May Allah forgive you O Abu Bakr!’”
The companion turned to Abu Bakr and said, "May Allah forgive you O Abu Bakr!
May Allah forgive you O Abu Bakr!"
How can we revive this air of mercy and love and brotherhood that the
companions lived? The Messenger of Allah showed us in the following ways:
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Allah says:
On those who believe and work deeds of righteousness, will the Most
Gracious bestow love (Maryam 19/96).
2. Spreading Salaam to Those Whom You Know and Those Whom You Do Not
“You shall not enter Jannah until you believe, and you shall not believe
until you love one another. Shall I not guide you to something that – if you
do it – you shall love one another? Spread salaam amongst yourselves”
(Muslim).
A man came to RasulAllah and asked him, “Which Islam is the best?”
He said, “To feed the hungry and to give salaam to those you know and
those you don't know” (Bukhari and Muslim).
“Tahaaddu tahaabbu (Give gifts and you shall love one another)” (Bukhari).
4. Telling Your Brother or Sister that You Love Them for the Sake of Allah
This is one of the ways to solidify the brotherhood and sisterhood when your
brother or sister knows that you love them.
These days people are loved for the clothes they wear, so they buy more
expensive clothes. Others are loved for the cars they drive, so they buy newer
models. But how many are loved for the sake of Allah and what kind of effect
would that have?
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Allahu Akbar! Imagine if it were you that RasulAllah said this to.
Mu'aadh replied, “May He whom you have loved me for love you also.”
In conclusion, if you remember only one thing today, let it be the following
words of RasulAllah. Take it as your motto until it carries you to Jannah. He
sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said:
"Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him say good things or
keep quiet!"
It's one of the greatest sins and yet it's something we do day after day.
Sometimes we don't even realise it. You're just chatting away with your friends
and you begin to talk about somebody else. Our whole lives are based around
'Home and Away' and 'Neighbours', soaps based on lying, backbiting etc. But
look at what the Prophet (saw) said about it:
The Prophet (saw) was sitting with his companions one day and one of them was
speaking badly about someone who wasn't there. As the man got up to leave the
Prophet (saw) said to him: "Pick Your Teeth!" "But I haven't eaten anything." The
man protested. "No" the Prophet (saw) said "YOU HAVE EATEN THE FLESH
OF YOUR DEAD BROTHER".
"Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? No, you would hate
it." (Ch49: v12)
The Prophet (saw) told us "Backbiting is to say something about someone they
wouldn't like said about them....If what bad you said about them is true, then you
have backbited and if it is false then you have slandered them."
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If you're still not convinced of how big a sin backbiting really is, then look at the
punishment Allah has in store for the backbiters. The Prophet (saw) described:
"On the night of Mirage I passed by some people who had metal hooks in their
hands and were clawing at their faces and their necks with them. I asked Gabriel
'Who were these people?' He said 'These are the people who eat the flesh of
human beings and disgrace them'.
This is how big of a sin backbiting is looked upon and yet we continue to backbite
without a second thought, next time you lie, talk about somebody, remember
Allah (swt) and the Prophet (saw) and put them in front of you before you speak.
Maybe we think it's all right to take the mock out of someone so long as we say it
to their face. 'We'll make fun of the way someone talks, walks, or how they look.
Allah warns us against such behaviour: "O you who believe. Let not some men
laugh at others, it may be the that they are better than you. Nor let some women
laugh at others it may be that they are better than you. Nor abuse each other ,
nor be sarcastic to each other by using offensive nicknames..." (Ch49v11)
Don't forget that Allah made us the way we are, so how can you even think of
making fun of his creation?
Cool to Swear?
Listen to yourself and to your friends speaking one day - nearly every sentence
will have a swear word in it, thinking it's cool and macho to swear, copying the
idols of TV and the cinema. Is it really 'cool' to swear? The Hellfire is far from
being cool. People will wish they were cool then rather than being cool in this
world. Remember! That every time you speak , an angel writes down what you
say, and that one day you will have to answer for every single word you ever
uttered. So if you swear at someone then it's written down as a sin against you.
You're only harming yourself. The Prophet (saw) said that "Abusing a Muslim is a
sin and fighting with him is disbelief." (MUSLIM).
We've all been there - you're just so angry with somebody and the only way you
can express yourself, is to swear at them. The solution? ...
A man came to the Prophet (saw) one day and said "Advise me". The prophet
(saw) said "Don't become angry. Don't become angry. Don't become angry"....
"When one of you gets angry while he is standing up, he should sit down. Then
anger will leave him, and if not then he should lie down" (Ahmad). So let us follow
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this beautiful advice of the Prophet (saw) and remember that anger is from
shaitan. If someone angers you or swears at you then don't harm yourself by
doing the same but respond in a better way as Allah says in the Quran:
"Repel evil with what is better. Then he who was your worst enemy will become
your best friend." (Ch41v33)
How often do we say such a phrase or say that "I was only joking". We treat lies
as being trivial. However we are told that "Allah's messenger did not hate
anything more than lying"(Ahmed). The Prophet (saw) was once asked "Can a
Muslim be a coward?" He (saw) replied "Yes." and then asked "Can a Muslim be
a miser?" and the reply was "Yes." The Prophet (saw) was then asked "Can a
Muslim be a liar?" The Prophet (saw) replied "NO! A Muslim can never be a liar".
Furthermore, he said "Truth leads to virtue and virtue leads to paradise...Lying
leads to wickedness and wickedness leads to the hellfire." (Bukhari). As we know
that one lie leads to another ten lies which lead to bad actions. Remember you
can lie and think that you have got away with it but on the day of Judgement your
hands, tongue and feet will bear testimony against you and tell the truth.
One day one of the companions asked the Prophet (saw) "O Messenger of Allah.
Will we be called to account for what we say?" He replied "May you be lost to
your mother - people will be thrown, faces down into the hellfire, only on account
to what their tongues said." (Tirmidhi).
Indeed the tongue controls the rest of your body. A well controlled tongue will
keep us within Islam but a loose tongue will destroy us.
The Prophet (saw) said "When a person gets up in the morning, all the parts of
his body make a plea to his tongue saying; 'Fear Allah regarding us, because we
follow you. If you are right then we shall also be right , and if you are wrong then
we shall also be wrong." (Tirmidhi)
Instead of swearing, lying and engaging in useless talk we can use our tongues
in better ways and what better than telling people about Islam. Allah says "Who is
better in speech than one who calls (men) to Allah and works righteousness and
says I am one of those who bow down in Islam" (Ch 41v33)
Indeed if you control your tongue and speak good then paradise can be yours.
The Prophet (saw) said "Whoever can guarantee me two things I can guarantee
them Paradise." The companions asked "What O Messenger of Allah?" He
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replied "What is between his jaws (his tongue) and his legs (private parts)."
(Bukhari)
I've lied and backbited, sworn and made fun of others. I must be doomed I must
be going to hell!"
"O my servants who have wronged themselves. never despair of the mercy of
Allah for truly he forgives all sins. He is the Forgiving, the Merciful." (Ch39v53)
So if you really repent and turn back to Allah and promise not to commit the sin
again then truly Allah's promise is true and He will forgive you. If you've
backbitten someone - go and tell the person whom you backbited and apologise
sincerely and ask them to forgive you. But if you think that the situation will get
worse then turn back to Allah sincerely begging for his forgiveness then to make
up for what you said, go around and talk good of him.
As we know that the best person to have ever lived is the Prophet Muhammad
(saw) and he is the best of example for mankind. If we follow him we can never
go wrong. Ayesha (RA) the Prophet's wife described the Prophets conduct as
follows:
"He was neither a obscene talker nor a user of bad words. He did not shout nor
did he repay evil with evil. He used to forgive people and overlook their sins."
(Tirmidhi)
Final Advice: A beautiful saying of the Prophet (saw) that will ensure the
protection of our tongue. The Messenger of Allah (saw) said:
"Whoever believes in Allah and the Last day, LET HIM EITHER SPEAK GOOD
OR KEEP SILENT" (Agreed upon)
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