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Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who lived with their mother in

a
meadow. One day the mother pig said to the three little pigs, "You need to go
out
into the world and make your own way." So they waved "goodbye" and out
into
the world they went.
The pigs decided to build houses near the woods. A big bad wolf lived in the
woods. He was not happy when he saw the three little pigs building houses
nearby.
The first little pig was lazy. He made a house of straw. The big bad wolf
huffed
and puffed and blew it down.
The second little pig worked a little harder than the first little pig. He made a
house of twigs. The big bad wolf huffed and puffed and blew the house down.
The third little pig made a house of bricks. The big bad wolf huffed and
puffed
and huffed and puffed. But the house did not fall down. This made the big
bad
wolf very, very angry. He went up on the roof and tried to get into the house
through the chimney. He climbed into the chimney and slid down into a pot
of
boiling water. He ran out of the house and never came back!

Once upon a time, there were some pigs loved their lives and were happy all
the time. One day their mother pig kindly decided to help them achieve
independence. The pigs worked hard. It was scary to be by themselves. One
pig felt lazy after all the work and gave up. Another pig did a little more work
but soon got discouraged. The last pig was energetic and invigorated. One
day they came into great danger. The first pig was terrifiedhis house was
not safe! He felt more comfortable in his brother pigs house. That house was
not safe either. Finally, the last house, the last house that felt like home, was
safe and secure. Danger was defeated, and the pigs were relieved and lived
in peace for the rest of their lives.

Therewasanoldsowwiththreelittlepigs,andasshehadnotenoughtokeepthem,
shesentthemouttoseektheirfortune.Thefirstthatwentoffmetamanwithabundle
ofstraw,andsaidtohim,"Please,man,givemethatstrawtobuildmeahouse."
Whichthemandid,andthelittlepigbuiltahousewithit.
Presentlycamealongawolf,andknockedatthedoor,andsaid,"Littlepig,littlepig,
letmecomein."
Towhichthepiganswered,"No,no,bythehairofmychinychinchin."
Thewolfthenansweredtothat,"ThenI'llhuff,andI'llpuff,andI'llblowyourhouse
in."Sohehuffed,andhepuffed,andheblewhishousein,andateupthelittlepig.
Thesecondlittlepigmetamanwithabundleoffurze[sticks],andsaid,"Please,man,
givemethatfurzetobuildahouse."Whichthemandid,andthepigbuilthishouse.
Thenalongcamethewolf,andsaid,"Littlepig,littlepig,letmecomein."
"No,no,bythehairofmychinychinchin."
"ThenI'llpuff,andI'llhuff,andI'llblowyourhousein."Sohehuffed,andhepuffed,
andhepuffed,andhehuffed,andatlastheblewthehousedown,andheateupthe
littlepig.
Thethirdlittlepigmetamanwithaloadofbricks,andsaid,"Please,man,giveme
thosebrickstobuildahousewith."Sothemangavehimthebricks,andhebuilthis
housewiththem.
Sothewolfcame,ashedidtotheotherlittlepigs,andsaid,"Littlepig,littlepig,let
mecomein."
"No,no,bythehairofmychinychinchin."
"ThenI'llhuff,andI'llpuff,andI'llblowyourhousein."
Well,hehuffed,andhepuffed,andhehuffedandhepuffed,andhepuffedand
huffed;buthecouldnotgetthehousedown.Whenhefoundthathecouldnot,with
allhishuffingandpuffing,blowthehousedown,hesaid,"Littlepig,Iknowwhere
thereisanicefieldofturnips."
"Where?"saidthelittlepig.

"Oh,inMr.Smith'shomefield,andifyouwillbereadytomorrowmorningIwillcall
foryou,andwewillgotogetherandgetsomefordinner."
"Verywell,"saidthelittlepig,"Iwillbeready.Whattimedoyoumeantogo?"
"Oh,atsixo'clock."
Well,thelittlepiggotupatfive,andgottheturnipsbeforethewolfcame(whichhe
didaboutsix)andwhosaid,"Littlepig,areyouready?"
Thelittlepigsaid,"Ready!Ihavebeenandcomebackagain,andgotanicepotfulfor
dinner."
Thewolffeltveryangryatthis,butthoughtthathewouldbeuptothelittlepig
somehoworother,sohesaid,"Littlepig,Iknowwherethereisaniceappletree."
"Where?"saidthepig.
"DownatMerryGarden,"repliedthewolf,"andifyouwillnotdeceivemeIwill
comeforyou,atfiveo'clocktomorrowandgetsomeapples."
Well,thelittlepigbustledupthenextmorningatfouro'clock,andwentoffforthe
apples,hopingtogetbackbeforethewolfcame;buthehadfurthertogo,andhadto
climbthetree,sothatjustashewascomingdownfromit,hesawthewolfcoming,
which,asyoumaysuppose,frightenedhimverymuch.
Whenthewolfcameuphesaid,"Littlepig,what!Areyouherebeforeme?Arethey
niceapples?"
"Yes,very,"saidthelittlepig."Iwillthrowyoudownone."Andhethrewitsofar,
that,whilethewolfwasgonetopickitup,thelittlepigjumpeddownandranhome.
Thenextdaythewolfcameagain,andsaidtothelittlepig,"Littlepig,thereisafair
atShanklinthisafternoon.Willyougo?"
"Ohyes,"saidthepig,"Iwillgo.Whattimeshallyoubeready?"
"Atthree,"saidthewolf.Sothelittlepigwentoffbeforethetimeasusual,andgotto
thefair,andboughtabutterchurn,whichhewasgoinghomewith,whenhesawthe
wolfcoming.Thenhecouldnottellwhattodo.Sohegotintothechurntohide,and
bysodoingturneditaround,anditrolleddownthehillwiththepiginit,which
frightenedthewolfsomuch,thatheranhomewithoutgoingtothefair.Hewentto

thepig'shouse,andtoldhimhowfrightenedhehadbeenbyagreatroundthingwhich
camedownthehillpasthim.
Thenthelittlepigsaid,"Ha,Ifrightenedyou,then.Ihadbeentothefairandboughta
butterchurn,andwhenIsawyou,Igotintoit,androlleddownthehill."
Thenthewolfwasveryangryindeed,anddeclaredhewouldeatupthelittlepig,and
thathewouldgetdownthechimneyafterhim.Whenthelittlepigsawwhathewas
about,hehungonthepotfullofwater,andmadeupablazingfire,and,justasthe
wolfwascomingdown,tookoffthecover,andinfellthewolf;sothelittlepigputon
thecoveragaininaninstant,boiledhimup,andatehimforsupper,andlivedhappily
everafterwards.

Intimepast,thoughnotlongago,therelivedpigs.Instature...little.Innumber...three.Who

beingofanagebothentitledandinspiredtoseektheirfortune.Didsetabouttodothusly.When
theyhadtraveledadistance,pignumberedfirstspake.Saying,"Harkenbrethren,heedthis
tempestuousrealm.""Tarrywelongfromhearthandhomeweshallfare,Ifear,[snort]notwell."
Andsobeingcollectivelyagreedbutindividuallyimpelled,Thediminutiveswinesetabouteach
toerectforhimselfanabode.PignumberedOnedidconstructhishousefromstraw.Pig
numberedTwodidlikewise.Though,rather,notfromstraw,insteadfromsticks.Meanwhile,
uniqueinhisimaginings,pignumberedThreediderectushisdomicile,Stalwartandgarish,a
structuremadefrombrickentirely.Soontherehappenedalong,asisfrequentlythescenarioin
classictaleofprotagonistpig,orredhoodedchild...Awolf.Carnivorousnatureinfullseasonhe
calledouttothestrawensconcedswine.Saying,"Praythee,littlepig,grantmeentrance."But
pigOnerecalledwithsageforebodingthat,"Heismadwhotrustsinthetamenessofabelly
pinchedwolf."Andrespondedimmediately,"Nay!Itshallnotbe!""Indeed,notbywhitor
whiskeredjowl!"Preparedforthismostexpectedresponse,thewolfrepliedimmediately."Then
steelthyselflittlepig.""ForthwithshallIendeavorbyemployingmeansbothhuffingand
puffingtodismantleyonflaxenfortress."Whereuponthereissuedforthfromthewolfanexhale
ofgaleproportions,Thatquicklyrenderedstrawhoveltodregsanddrossandcarriedaloftpiglet
andshatteredquartersboth.Exposednowtoclawandfang,pigletOnemadehaste,wolfin
pursuit,Tothestickfestoonedsanctumofpeccarysecondary.CausingpigTwotocryoutin
dismay,"Well!Thisknotsmyknickers!""Themarshalingofferalwolftomydoorstepis
nowhereamongthoseendeavorsamenableorcongenial.""Athousandpardons,"squealedOne.
"T'wouldseemthebeast'smaimfullbreathhaspurgedmeofhomeandsoundjudgmentalike!"
Themightymaelstromofthewolf'sexhalesplatteredsecondswine'sshackandshortenedhis
sanctimoniousscoldingsimultaneously."Lo!AndBehold!"squealedTwo."Standwenowamid
woodenwreckagetremulousandvulnerable.""Withnaryastrategyforeschewingthecanine
devourerloomingindeadlyproximity.""Strategy!"squealedOne."While'tisnobleto
contemplatetacticalparticularities,""Pressedaswearewiththetimerestraintforbidding
detailedstrategicalconversations,""IwouldurgeweRUN!""Weeweeweeweeweeweewee!"
Whetherbytheirownfleetfootedcompetenceorthewolf'swinlessattitude,Thediminutive
swinearrivedattheirultimatekindredneighbor'sinexpungeablebrickingressunscathed.Upon
thethirdpig'sdoorwithurgenthoovestheypounded.Callingout,"Unbarthisentranceandwith
hastewebeseechthee!"ThethirdpighailedfromtheAmericanColonies.Andpossessinga
vocabularysubstantiallylessrobustthanhisimpromptuvisitors,replied,"Saywhat?""Seekwe
sanctuary!"theyimploredonthevergeofhysteria."Lestwefallforthwithtotheravenous
appetencyofyonderapproachingcarnivore!"Stillconfoundedbytheirimportunatewords,pig
Threedidrenderajarhisportal.WhereuponOneandTwospilledthroughandcollapsedbeyond
thethreshold,enervated."So,y'alljustwantedtocomein?""Youcould'asaidthat."Thesinister
hissofthewolfcouldonceagainbeheardoutside."Praythee,pigs,grantmeentrance.""The
wolf!"saidOneandTwo."Wolf?"saidThree."What'dyasupposehewants?""Heseekstogain
purchasewithin.""Indeedhewouldoccupythisveryalcovewerehebutaffordedthemost
meagerofopportunities.""Right.""I'mjustgonnagoaskhimwhathewants.""Underno
circumstances!"squealedTwo,flingingselfbodilyagainsttheportal."Thereisnaughttobe
gainedaccostingexternalopponent.""Saveourownimmediatedemise!""Whatdidyousay
aboutmyMomma?"Houseandoccupantswereagainengulfedinamalevolentblastofwolfish
wind.Thefoundationshook,theframerattled.Andlo,totheastonishedeyesofpigletand
encroachingscoundrelalike,Stoodthethirdpigslodging,undaunted.Aghastanddismayed,pig
TwoqueriedofThree."Howdoesagainstsuchrelentlessandtorrentialonslaughtthisdomicile

endure?"PigThree,puffedoutchest,tappedahooftothehearthandresponded."It'sAmerican
Made."

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs - ages 2, 4, and 6. Are their ages even or odd?
Each little pig wanted to build a house. Pig #1 wanted to build a house of straw. Straw costs $4 a
bundle. He needs 9 bundles. How much will he spend?
The 2nd little pig wanted to build a house of sticks. Each bundle of sticks weighs 5 pounds.
Pig#2 needs 10 bundles. How much will they weigh?
Pig #3 wanted to build a house of bricks. Each side of his 4-sided house needs 100 bricks. How
many bricks will he need?
How many different ways could the pigs arrange their houses?
Pig #1 worked on his house 3 hours a day for 2 days. How long did he work?
Pig #2 built his house in 8 hours. He worked for 4 days. How many hours did he work each day?
Pig #3 worked for 16 hours. How much longer did he work than Pig # 2?
While they were walking, a very large wolf saw them. He was starving. "What a swell meal
they'd make," he thought. If he could get 5 pork chops from each one, how many pork chops
could he make?
Pig # 1 was getting crabby. He felt something was wrong. "We're being followed!" he screamed.
"Let's run for home!" The pigs ran and ran. They ran 4 miles in 2 minutes. How many miles did
they run each minute?
When they got home, Pig #1 heard a knock at his door. "Little Pig, Little Pig let me in!"
(Everyone) "Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin!" Now the wolf was angry. He huffed and
puffed and blew the house down! Little Pig No. 1 screamed and ran back to No. 2's house, which
was 125 ft. away. About how far was that?
Wolf was really angry now - and hungry too! At the stick house he cried, "Little Pig, Little Pig,
let me in." (Everyone) "Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin!" "Oh yeah?" said the wolf. "I'll
show you!" And he brought out his high powered fan he got on sale at Osco for $9.98. About
how much was the fan?
It took only 1 minute to blow down the stick house. How many seconds is that?
Yes, the stick house blew down too. Both pigs went squealing down the road to their brother,
who like all big brothers said, "I told you so!" And they sat down to watch TV. Their favorite
show, Pigmalion, comes on at 8:00 p.m. It was 7:30 p.m. How long did they have to wait for
their program?
Anyway, this wolf wasn't stupid. He knew he couldn't blow down the brick house without
popping a lung so he thought...."I'll just get in my 1963 Volkswagen and run this house down!" If
it's 1999, how old was the car?
Well, Mr. Wolf hadn't taken very good care of his old car, and Pig #3 did a pretty good job with
those bricks, In a contest between bricks and a Volkswagen Beetle, the house won. The pigs were
able to make 3 lovely furs for winter, and quit their jobs to sell scrap metal. If the car weighed 1
ton, how many pounds is that?
How much money would they make selling scrap metal at $1.72 a pound? Round the selling
price of scrap metal to the nearest dollar.
And so they lived happily ever after now with their successful pig-iron business. If each pig
earns $100 a week, how much will they earn altogether for their week's work?

Once there was a mig bomma sow who lived with her pee little thriglets on a big fog harm. They
lived a line fife slopping with gorge and wallowing in the pud muddle and all, until one night
when the sig pow took the pee little thrigs aside for a tearious salk. "Oink," she wide, creeping.
"Oink, oink oink!" (Or, to verbaphrase her porridge, "Boys, you header bed for the yorest fonder
before harmer Fank bakes macon!")
So a few dours before haybreak, the pee little thrigs set out to fake their mortune in the feep
dorest. Now the lirst fiddle pig's name was Joe. Poe jig said, "I'm gonna build me a haw strouse,"
and he began strickin' up paw. The second piddle lig's name was Luke, and Puke lig said, "I'm
gonna build me a hick stouse," and he began stickin' up pigs. Now the lird piddle thig's name was
Dave. He was a mite barter than his smothers, earning him the name pigtickle prack. Pave dig
said, "I'm gonna build me a hone and storter mouse," and he began erecting clocks.
Now I won't same to clay that streaving waw or sighing ticks is easy 'cause it tain't rue, but it sell
of a hot limper than stortaring moans, and by the time Pave dig had the fox riled for his
pyreplace, the other poo tigs were bun dildin' and tootin' for ruffles. "Look at pigtickle prack,"
the pool crigs laughed, "pettin' like a swig over his stig bones." But pigtickle prack had seen tolf
wacks that day, and he wept kurking.
Eventually the hone stouse was done, and all bree throthers had dwellable livings. Pave dig never
did tell the other poo tigs about the tolf wracks, so Poe jig was shighty mocked to wake up to the
sounds of walivatin' soof. "Piddle lig, piddle lig, ket me lum in!" "Not by the chuzz on my finny
fin fin!"
"Then I'll larf and I'll barf and I'll hoe your blouse down!"
So the wolf larfed and he barfed and he hew the blouse down, whereupon Poe jig run off to Puke
lig's house and broke his wother. That wungry holf was right behind. "Piddle ligs, piddle ligs, I
wants two pat figs, I does!"
"Not by the muzz on my fuzzly fuzzle fuzz!" said Puke lig.
"Then I'll larf and I'll barf and I'll hoe your blouse down!"So the wolf larfed and he barfed and he
hew the blouse down. Loe and Juke freely reeked and run off to the hock rouse and dolted the
bore. The wungry holf got there quite rick, but not nasty fuff.
"Piddle ligs, piddle ligs, undolt the bore!" "Not by the mollicles on my fandible!" said Pave dig
(who never missed a chance to use a wig bird).
"Then I'll larf and I'll barf and I'll hoe your blouse down!"Pave dig just smiled and said, "Woe
blay!"
So the wolf larfed and he barfed and he larfed and he barfed, till he was foo in the blace, with no
effectable notice on the stock ructure. The wig bad bolf sat down to cogitate on this uneventful
prediction, when he noticed the choking smimney. Not bein' a very wart smolf, he chimed the
climney and dropped tail first into a boiling stot of poo.
That wolf earned his bass and just about everything else that day, since Pave dig clammed the
slover on the poo stot, leaving the other poo tigs mealing in squirthful reverie. Pave dig turned to

his overweight brothers and said, "Molf wheat is beaner than leef, and it would bepig you hooves
to conduce your resumption of faturated sats." The very next day they started a diet of
vegetabically grown organelles, and they began electing crocks for two new hock roams for Lo
and Puke jig.

WaybackinOnceUponaTimetime,Iwasmakingabirthdaycakeformydearold
granny.Ihadaterriblesneezingcold.Iranoutofsugar.SoIwalkeddownthestreet
toaskmyneighborforacupofsugar.Nowthisneighborwasapig.Andhewasn't
toobrighteither.Hehadbuilthiswholehouseoutofstraw.Canyoubelieveit?I
meanwhoinhisrightmindwouldbuildahouseofstraw?SoofcoursetheminuteI
knockedonthedoor,itfellrightin.Ididn'twanttojustwalkintosomeoneelse's
house.SoIcalled,"LittlePig,LittlePig,areyouin?"Noanswer.Iwasjustaboutto
gohomewithoutthecupofsugarformydearoldgranny'sbirthdaycake.
That'swhenmynosestartedtoitch.Ifeltasneezecomingon.WellIhuffed.AndI
snuffed.AndIsneezedagreatsneeze.
Andyouknowwhat?Thewholedarnstrawhousefelldown.Andrightinthemiddle
ofthepileofstrawwastheFirstLittlePigdeadasadoornail.Hehadbeenhomethe
wholetime.Itseemedlikeashametoleaveaperfectlygoodhamdinnerlyingtherein
thestraw.SoIateitup.Thinkofitasacheeseburgerjustlyingthere.Iwasfeelinga
littlebetter.ButIstilldidn'thavemycupofsugar.SoIwenttothenextneighbor's
house.ThisneighborwastheFirstLittlePig'sbrother.Hewasalittlesmarter,butnot
much.Hehasbuilthishouseofsticks.Irangthebellonthestickhouse.Nobody
answered.Icalled,"Mr.Pig,Mr.Pig,areyouin?"Heyelledback."Goawaywolf.
Youcan'tcomein.I'mshavingthehairsonmyshinnychinchin."
IhadjustgrabbedthedoorknobwhenIfeltanothersneezecomingon.Ihuffed.AndI
snuffed.AndItriedtocovermymouth,butIsneezedagreatsneeze.
Andyouarenotgoingtobelievethis,buttheguy'shousefelldownjustlikehis
brother's.Whenthedustcleared,therewastheSecondLittlePigdeadasadoornail.
Wolf'shonor.Nowyouknowfoodwillspoilifyoujustleaveitoutintheopen.SoI
didtheonlythingtherewastodo.Ihaddinneragain.Thinkofitasasecondhelping.
Iwasgettingawfullyfull.Butmycoldwasfeelingalittlebetter.AndIstilldidn't
havethatcupofsugarrformydearoldgranny'sbirthdaycake.SoIwenttothenext
house.ThisguywastheFirstandSecondLittlePig'sbrother.Hemusthavebeenthe
brainsofthefamily.Hehadbuilthishouseofbricks.Iknockedonthebrickhouse.
Noanswer.Icalled,"MrPig,Mr.Pig,areyouin?"Anddoyouknowwhatthatrude
littleporkeranswered?"Getoutofhere,Wolf.Don'tbothermeagain."
Talkaboutimpolite!Heprobablyhadawholesackfulofsugar.Andhewouldn'tgive
meevenonelittlecupformydearsweetoldgranny'sbirthdaycake.Whatapig!
Iwasjustabouttogohomeandmaybemakeanicebirthdaycardinsteadofacake,
whenIfeltmycoldcomingon.IhuffedAndIsnuffed.AndIsneezedonceagain.

ThentheThirdLittlePigyelled,"Andyouroldgrannycansitonapin!"NowI'm
usuallyaprettycalmfellow.Butwhensomebodytalksaboutmygrannylikethat,Igo
aLittlecrazy.Whenthecopsdroveup,ofcourseIwastryingtobreakdownthisPig's
door.AndthewholetimeIwashuffingandpuffingandsneezingandmakingareal
scene.
Therestastheysayishistory.
ThenewsreportersfoundoutaboutthetwopigsIhadfordinner.Theyfiguredasick
guygoingtoborrowacupofsugardidn'tsoundveryexciting.
Sotheyjazzedupthestorywithallofthat"Huffandpuffandblowyourhousedown"

AndtheymademetheBigBadWolf.That'sitTherealstory.Iwasframed."

The three little pigs are a classic fairy tale, but upon closer inspection, I
believe that they are more relevant than ever. You see in the days of Patriot
Acts, terrorist attacks and Guantanamo Bays this story offers more than
meets the eye. Let's look at what the main characters represent before I
weave my tale for you.
Pig #1
This is the working class. They spend so much time trying to make ends
meet that they cannot spend a lot of money on their homes. This is why the
first pig was forced to make his house out of straw. He couldn't afford
anything else. Also, many of the working class people in this country are first
or second generation American. This makes them quite vulnerable in today's
suspicious society.
Pig #2
This is the middle class. Their house is made of sticks or wood. The
craftsmanship is a little more durable because they have a bit more
disposable income. However, the middle class is in peril. It is shrinking at an
alarming rate as we become a dichotomous society of rich and poor.
Pig #3
This is the upper class, the wealthy. They own and control most of the
resources in this country. They could afford the more expensive brick as a
building material, and they can afford to pay skilled laborers to construct it.
The upper class is virtually untouchable.
The Wolf
Full of hot air...hmm, can you say politician? Of course you can. The wolf
represents our government, more specifically the Department of Homeland
Security. He comes to your door and demands to be let in so that they can
ransack your home for evidence of terrorist activities.
Our Story
The first little pig builds his house of straw. He is most likely a hard-working
immigrant with limited means. One day the Department of Homeland
Security shows up and demands to be let inside because of a threat against
national security. The pig tries to refuse, but his house is immediately
destroyed and he forced back to his native country. Now that the immigrants
and the poor have been sponged from the country, the wolf sets his sights
on the middle class or the pig with his house of wood. This pig has the
resources to put up more of a fight, but in the end the government has
become so powerful that the middle class is destroyed. Since we are now a
country bereft of immigrants, the middle class disappears and they become
the working class. Now, the government has one more target, the wealthy.
The wealthy are not even the slightest bit scared of the government because
they know that their money will keep them safe. The government may try to
tax the wealthy, but the wealthy can set up tax shelters and dummy
corporations to hide their money. This means that the government eventually
gives up and returns to harass the new working class who have probably just
began to build straw houses.

Once upon a time there were three little pigs.


The straw pig, the stick pig, and the brick pig.
One day this nasty old wolf came up to the
straw pigs house and said "I'm gonna huff and
puff and blow your house down." And he did!!
So the straw pig went running over to the stick
pig's house and said, "Please let me in, the wolf
just blew down my house."
So the stick pig let the straw pig in.
Just then the wolf showed up and said, "I'm
gonna huff and puff and blow your house down."
And he did!
So the straw pig and the stick pig went running
over to the bricks pigs' house and said, "Let us
in, let us in, the big bad wolf just blew our
houses down."
So the brick pig let them in just as the wolf
showed up.
The wolf said "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow
your house down." The straw pig and the stick
pig were so scared!
But the brick pig picked up the phone and made
a call.
A few minutes passed and a big, black stretch
limo pulls up.

Out step three pigs named Louie, Vito,and


Dominic.
These pigs came over to the wolf, grabbed him
by the neck and beat the living heck out of him,
then one of them pulled out a gun, stuck it in
the wolf's mouth and fired.
Then they got back into their limo and drove off.
The straw pig and stick pig were amazed!
"Who the hell were those guys?" they asked.
"Those were my cousins from North Jersey--the
Guinea Pigs."
ONCE upon a time, when pigs could talk and no one had ever heard of
bacon,there lived an old piggy mother with her three little sons.
They had a very pleasant home in the middle of an oak forest, and were all
just as happy as the day was long, until one sad year when the acron crop
failed ; then, indeed, poor Mrs. Piggy-wiggy often had hard work to make
both ends meet.
One day she called her sons to her, and, with tears in her eyes, told them
that she must send them out into the wide world to seek ' their fortune.
She kissed them all round, and the three little pigs set out upon their travels,
each taking a different road, and carrying a bundle shrug on a stick across
his shoulder.
The first litfie pig had not gone far before he met a man' carrying a bundle of
straw; so he said to him:
"Please, man, give me that straw to build me a house?" The man was very
good-natured, so he gave him the bundle of straw, and the little pig built a
pretty
little house with it.
No sooner was it finished, and the little pig thinking of going to bed, than a
wolf came along, knocked at the door, and said: "Little pig, little pig, let me
come in."
But the little pig laughed softly, and answered: "No, no, by the hair of my
chinny-chin-chin."

Then said the wolf sternly: "I will make you let me in; for I'll huff, and I'll puff,
and I'll blow your house in!"
So he buffed and he puffed, and he blew his house in, because, you see, it
was only of straw and too light; and when he had blown the house in, he ate
up the little pig,and did not leave so much as the tip of his tail.
The second little pig also met a man, and he was carrying a bundle of furze;
so piggy said politely: "Please, kind man, will you give me that furze to build
me a house ? ".
The man ageed, and piggy set to work to build himself a snug little house
before the night came on. It was scarcely finished when the wolf came along,
and said: "Little pig, little pig, let me come in."
"No, no, by the hair of my chirmy-chin-chin," answered the second little pig.
"Then I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in!" said the wolf. So he
huffed and he puffed, and he puffed, and he huffed, and at last he blew the
house in, and gobbled the little pig up in a trice.
Now, the third little pig met a man with a load of bricks and mortar, and he
said:"Please, man, will you give me those bricks to build a house with ?"
So the man gave him the bricks and mortar, and a little trowel as well, and
the little pig built himselfa nice strong little house. As soon as it was finished
the wolf came to call, just as he had done to the other little pigs, and said:
"Little pig, little pig, let me in!"
But the little pig answered: "No, no, by the hair of my ch inny-chin-chin."
"Then," said the wolf, "I'll huff, and I'II puff, and I'll blow your house in."
Well, he huffed, and he puffed, and he puffed, and he huffed, and he huffed,
and he puffed; but he could not get the house down. At last he had no breath
left to huff and puff with, so he sat down outside the little pig's house and
thought for awhile.
Presently he called out: "Little pig, I know where there is a nice field of
turnips."
"Where?" said the little pig.
"Behind the farmer's house, three fields away, and if you will be ready tomorrow morning I will call for you, and we will go together and get some
breakfast."

"Very well," said the little pig; "I will be sure to be ready. What time do you
mean to start?"
"At six o'clock," replied the wolf.
Well, the wise little pig got up at five, scampered away to the field, and
brought home a fine load of turnips before the wolf came. At six o'clock the
wolf came to the little pig's house and said: "Little pig, are you ready ?"
"Ready!" cried the little pig. "Why, I have been to the field and come back
long ago,and now I am busy boiling a pot-ful of turnips for breakfast."
The wolf was very angry indeed; but he made up his mind to catch the little
pig somehow or other;so he told him that he knew where there was a nice
apple-tree.
"Where?" said the little pig.
"Round the hill in the squire's orchard," the wolf said. "So if you will promise
to play me no tricks,I will come for you tomorrow morning at five o'clock, and
we will go there together and get some rosy -cheeked apples."
The next morning piggy got up at four o'clock and was off and away long
before the wolf came.
But the orchard was a long way off, and besides, he had the tree to climb,
which is a difficult matter for a little pig, so that before the sack he had
brought with him was quite filled he saw the wolf coming towards him.
He was dreadfully frightened, but he thought it better to put a good face on
the matter, so when the wolf said: "Little pig, why are you here before me?
Are they nice apples?" he replied at once:" Yes, very; I will throw down one
for you to taste." So he picked an apple and threw it so far that whilst the
wolf was running to fetch it he had time to jump down and scamper away
home.
The next day the wolf came again, and told the little pig that there was going
to be a fair in the town that afternoon, and asked him if he would go with
him.
"Oh! yes," said the pig, "I will go with pleasure.What time will you be ready to
start ?"
"At half-past three," said the wolf.
Of course, the little pig started long before the time, went to the fair, and
bought a fine large butter-churn, and was trotting away with it on his back
when he saw the wolf coming..

He did not know what to do, so he crept into the churn to hide, and by so
doing started it rolling.
Down the hill it went, rolling over and over, with the little pig squeaking
inside.
The wolf could not think what the strange thing railing down the hill could be;
so he turned tail and ran away home in a fright without ever going to the fair
at all. He went to the little pig's house to tell him how frightened he had been
by a large round thing which came rolling past him down the hill.
"Ha! ha!" laughed the little pig; "so I frightened you, eh? I had been to the
fair and
bought a butter-churn; when I saw you I got inside it and rolled down the
hill."
This made the wolf so angry that he declared that he would eat up the little
pig, and that nothing should save him, for he would jump down the chimney.
But the clever little pig hung a pot full of water over the hearth and then
made a blazing fire, and just as the wolf was coming down the chimney he
took off the cover and in fell the wolf. In a second the little pig had popped
the lid on again.
Then he boiled the wolf, and ate him for supper, and after that he lived
quietly and comfortably all his days, and was never troubled by a wolf again.

This story begins at a rap battle in the Bronx of New York. Hammy the
brother of Pork Grind and Bacon was up against the master the Big Bad Wolf.
The BBW had never lost but Hammy was about to change that. Hammy got
up and blew everyone away and the BBW couldnt respond and lost his first
battle, when it was all over the Wolf yelled to Hammy, I will get back at you
and your brothers for this, but Hammy couldnt hear it through all the
screaming and cheering. The next morning Bacon woke up and got out of his
house which was made of rap CDs. Bacon was the youngest and always
being picked on by his older brothers. He went over to his brothers house
Pork Grind which was made of bling. Pork Grind was the second oldest. He

was the cocky one in the family. He was always talking smack but never
really backed it up. The two brothers went to their oldest brother Hammys
house which was made of Brick. Now the brothers were always giving grief to
Hammy about his lame house but he didnt care because he was the leader
of their family.
The previous night Hammy had beaten the BBW in a rap battle and his
brothers were so excited about this event. Big Bro you owned that sucker
last night, said Bacon. Yeah you did he wont be coming near us ever
again, proclaimed Pork Grind. Hammy though trying to set an example said,
I got lucky and he put up a good fight. The two brothers shaking their
heads and knowing Hammy was being humble, both went back to their
houses to get celebration food. Bacon looking through his pantry heard
something outside. He looked out the window and standing there was the
BBW. The BBW yelled Bacon I know youre the brother of Hammy. I would
get out while you can before I blow this house down. Bacon thinking who
blows houses down anymore, responded What who does that anymore,
besides my CDs will hold up, but right when he was done the BBW had
already blown down his house. Bacon being the youngest ran as fast as he
could to his brothers house.
The BBW saw him run their and followed him. Bacon panting and trying to
talk as fast as he could to his brother got out Pork Grind the Big Bad Wolf is
coming, Pork Grind confused looked outside and saw the BBW standing
their. I will huff and puff and I will blow your house down. Pork Grind replied
try your best. Then his house of bling was all blown down and they ran to
Hammys house.
Now Bacon almost suffocating said Hammy the BBW wants revenge.
Hammy looked out his windows and saw the BBW standing their. The BBW
yelled, I want revenge for last night, so I will huff and I will puff and I will
blow your house down. Hammy told both his brothers to stay calm. They
waited for a while and nothing happened to the house and they looked
outside and the wolf was still huffing and puffing and trying to blow their
house down. Then the BBW thinking on his feet climbed to their roof and saw
a chimney, he scooted his way down but the pigs had heard him on the roof
and set a hot pan right under. The BBW fell on this steaming hot pan and
went screaming out of the chimney and into to the Boston Bay.

Once there were three little pigs. Two went to college, and the other
pig was dumb so he couldnt go to college. He didnt even know how much
2+2 was.
One pig made a metal house, one made a house of bricks with a sign that
said,
"Keep out!"
The dumb one couldnt afford a house. He was homeless, and slept in the
streets. Boy, that wasnt too smart!
So one day a big, bad wolf came into town. He found the dumb pig. He said,
Youre dumb, can I eat you? The pig was so dumb that he said yes. So the
wolf did.
His other two brothers, who had gone to college, relaxed together having
some beer and some pretzels.
The moral of this story is: Always go to college, pigs!

Onceuponatimetherewerethreelittlepigs.Onepigmadehishouseoutof
paper,theothermadehishouseoutofsticks,andthethirdmadehishouseoutof
metal.

ThebigbadwolfwasonhiswaytoTampaBay,Florida,toeatthethreelittle
pigs.Aftermuchtravelingtimehearrivedatthefirsthouse.

Hewentuptothedoorandsaid,OpenuporIllhuffandpuffandIllblowyour
housedown.Butthepigdidntopenthedoor.Insteadheranouttheback
door.Thenthewolfblewthehousedown.

Thepigrantohisbrothershouse.Thewolfthenrantothesecondpigshouse.He
wentuptothedoorandsaid,OpenthisdoororIllhuffandpuffandblowyour
housedown.

Thetwopigsranoutthebackdoortothethirdbrothershouse.Theywarnedhim
ofthewolf.Sincethehousewasmetal,theydecidedtoplaysomecards.

Thewolfthenrantothethirdpigshouse.Hewentuptothedoor,wasaboutto
knockonit,whenhesawanopenwindow.Heclimbedin.
Thethreepigswereplayingcards.Whenheclimbedinheknockedovera
glass.Theyheardhim.Buttheykeptquiet.

Thewolfcreptintothekitchenlookingforthepigs.Heopenedtheovendoor
andquicklythepigsshovedhimintotheovenandclosedthedoor.

Theyhadagreatdinnerthatevening.

Once upon a time there were three little pigs, who were involved into the
world of Mafia.
The Three Little Pigs, loved to play games and have fun with pig girls.
Nobody was happier than the three little pigs, and they easily made friends
with everyone (because they had a lot money).
Wherever they went, they received a nice welcome (because everybody
respected and feared them).
One day, a police wolf arrived to the neighborhood and started to ask for the
three little pigs. The three little pigs started to feel that they needed a way to
scape from the police.
Sadly, they knew that the fun was over now and they had to try to live like
the others. (At least to prettend), or they would be caught by the courageous
officer, with no more protection than their brawny bodies. They talked about
what to do, but each decided for himself to take their own.
The laziest and overconfident of the three little pig said he would be fine and
no one could catch him and even, he would have enough time to party with
his pig girls, and just decided to stay relaxed...
It only took a day to the officer to catch him.
Not as lazy as his brother, the second little pig went in search of his friends
to find a place to hide and at the same time he would have time to party all
day with his friends. But not all of them were truly friends and he was
betrayed by some of them...
It only took two days to the officer to find him and imprison him.
But the third little pig did not like, just staying relaxed, also he never trusted
no one around him, so that, he decided to build a hiding place for himself. It
took time, patience and hard work but he wanted it to be spacious, and most
of all, it had to protect him from the wolf officer!"
The days passed, but the eye of law never can be tricked so after a couple of
weeks the wisest of the three little pigs, was finally found.
But the third little pig was not born to be in jail, so while he was hidden he
contacted his men so that, they could prepared a way to set him free.

The pig's men brought a huge amount of money (coming from Mafia) and
had a long conversation with the wolf officer, promising to use the money to
build a new prison made of straws, a new bank made with wood and a new
school made with bricks.
The wolf officer agreed with them and decided to let them free by promising
to stay away from the world of dirty money.
Safe and happy, the wisest little pig called to his brothers. "No more dirty
money, no more problems to worry about!
From that terrible day and on, the three little pigs decided to work with a will.
In less time than they thought, they built three new brick houses.
The wolf officer wanted to see the little pigs's houses, at a distance he
caught sight of three chimneys, and he thought about the terrible situation
the three little pigs faced while they were in jail, so he smiled and said: He
who laughs last, laughs longest!.

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs. Two of them were happy, fun-loving pigs, determined to
eat low on the food chain and exist with a minimum impact to the ecosystem. The third pig, though happy
in her own dark and solitary way, thought all this was nonsense, and that what they really should worry
about was that nasty vegan wolf, who rode a rusty old bicycle and passed out hand-scrawled leaflets
about hemp activism each Tuesday.
Arent you, like worried about all those nasty teeth? the third pig said.
Oh, hes a vegan, come on! the other two would say.
Vegan or not, hes always looking so hungry.
Hes a vegan hemp activist. What danger is that?
So, when it became time to build homes, each pig decided for herself what to use. The first pig built her
house out of Portobello mushrooms. The second pig built her house out of bricks of tempeh. The third pig
look at both of them, rolled her eyes and put on an old Morrisey cd. Then she built her house out of
bacon.
Bacon!?!?!? Youre sick sick sick! the other two pigs said.
Youll be singing a different tune when that vegan wolf comes around. And besides, its nobody we
know.
Well, after their homes were built, everything settled down until Tuesday. The first two pigs were dancing
and singing
Whos afraid of the vegan wolf? The vegan wolf, the vegan wolf?
Whos afraid of the vegan wolf? Tra-la-la-la-la!
Suddenly, the pigs smelled an overpowering, but familiar hemp smell. Then they heard a rusty bicycle. It
was the vegan wolf! Before they knew it, the wolf was upon them. With a puff and a huff, he said:
Did you know that Hemp Seed is far more nutritious than even soybeans, contains more essential fatty
acids than any other source, is high in B-vitamins, and is 35% dietary fiber?
No Mr. Wolf, the two pigs said.
Well, theres lots to hemp that folks dont know and Sayare those Portobello mushrooms I smell?
Uh, yes, Mr. Wolf, thats my house, the first pig said.
All of a sudden, the wolf began to shake. His nose twitched, and his lips pulled back to reveal horrible
rows of jagged teeth.
OMIGOD! I LOVE PORTOBELLO MUSHROOMS! growled the vegan wolf, and he pounced upon
the first pigs house, ripping it to shreds. MMMMTASTY AND HIGH IN NIACIN!
The two pigs screamed, and ran to the second pigs house. From the window, they watched the vegan
wolf finish eating, licking his lips over the ruins of the house. And then, he got on his rusty bicycle and
went away.
After the wolf left, the two pigs breathed a sigh of relief.
Dont worry, said the second pig. My house is made of bricks. Well be safe here.
Bricks of tempeh, you idiots, sighed the third pig over some old Sisters of Mercy. Like thats going to
stop the vegan wolf.
But the other two pigs were deaf to her warning. Instead, they spent the week debating on whether they
should use their stock dividends to go to Burning Man or convert their SUV to biodiesel.
As they researched, they started singing again.
Whos afraid of the vegan wolf?
The vegan wolf, the vegan wolf?
Whos afraid of the vegan wolf?
Tra-la-la-la-la!

And everything settled down until the next Tuesday, when they smelled that familiar hemp smell, heard
that rusty bicycle. It was the vegan wolf!
All of a sudden, the wolf was upon them! With a puff and a huff, he said:
Did you know that eco-friendly hemp can be processed into a wide range of biomass energy sources,
from fuel pellets to liquid fuels and gas? Development of hemp biofuels could significantly reduce our
consumption of fossil fuels and nuclear power.
Wow, Mr. Wolf, the two pigs said.
16. Well, theres lots to hemp that folks dont know and Sayis that tempeh I smell?
Uh, yes, Mr. Wolf, thats my house, the second pig said.
All of a sudden, the wolf began to shake. His nose twitched, and his lips pulled back to reveal horrible
rows of jagged teeth.
OMIGOD! I LOVE TEMPEH! growled the vegan wolf, and he pounced upon the second pigs house,
ripping it to shreds. MMMMGOOD PROTEIN SOURCE!!!
The two pigs screamed, and scrambled to the third pigs house. From the window, they watched the vegan
wolf finish eating, licking his lips over the ruins of the house. And then, he got on his rusty bicycle and
went away.
After the wolf left, the two pigs breathed a sigh of relief. The third pig opened her door and squinted at
them.
You know how some pigs arent the type to say I told you so? she asked.
The other two pigs nodded hopefully.
Well, thats not me. I like SO told you so. What in the name of Charlottes Web were you thinking?
Portobello mushrooms Tempeh Hes a veganwolf! She rolled her eyes and sighed. Well, come on
in.
B-but your house is made of bacon. the first two pigs squealed.
Yes, bacon. Do you know any vegan whod come near bacon?
The other pigs shook their heads.
And besides, its nobody we know.
So the pigs all went inside, and although the first two pigs felt a little strange in the bacon house, they
knew their friend was right. Maybe a little sick, but right.
So they relaxed until the next Tuesday, looking at the third pigs Hot Topic catalog and started singing
again.
Whos afraid of the vegan wolf? The vegan wolf, the vegan wolf? Whos afraid of the vegan wolf? Trala-la-la-la!
And everything settled down until the next Tuesday, when they smelled that familiar hemp smell, heard
that rusty bicycle. It was the vegan wolf!
All of a sudden, the wolf was upon them! With a puff and a huff, he said:
Did you know that hemp is among the oldest industries on the planet? The Columbia History of the
World states that the oldest relic of human industry is a bit of hemp fabric dating back to
Get a real job, you mangy old hippie! the third pig interrupted disparagingly.
Hey, thats not very nice, but its cool, man, said the vegan wolf. Some folks still dont know a lot
about hemp and.Sayit that BACON I smell?
Yes, it is! smiled the third pig, tossing an aluminum can into the non-recyclable garbage.
Ewwwwbacon And youre a pig? Youre sick sick sick!
Its nobody we know. Now go bother someone else.
The wolf started away, shaking his head. Then, he smelled again, a little deeper this time. Bacon He
licked his lips and started salivating. He shook his head. No, Im a veganwhat would I tell my friends
at the food co-op?
Then his stomach growledbaconbut he shook his head again. No, its baconwhat would I tell my
Rabbi?
Then, the wind blew over the house, and suddenly the wolf began to shake. His nose twitched, and his
lips pulled back to reveal horrible rows of jagged teeth.

Its BACONNNNNNN! growled the up-till-recently vegan wolf, and he pounced upon the third pigs
house, ripping it to shreds. With oily bacon still dripping from his maw, he leered at the three quivering
pigs. More bacon, the wolf smiled as he moved toward them
Afterward, the wolf looked down at his bursting belly, belched, wiped his mouth with a hemp napkin, and
pedaled awkwardly away. Suddenly, he got a heart attack, fell over, and died.
The end.
The moral of our story:
Building a house from the dead bodies, oil, and suffering of those from your own species rarely results in
a happy ending, even if its nobody you know.

Onetime,awaybackyonder,theoldsowandherchildrenwerealllivinglongerthantheothercreatures.Itseems
tomethattheoldsowwasawidowwoman,andifIamnotmistaken,thatthatshehadfivechildren.Letmesee,
therewasBigPig,andtherewasLittlePig,andtherewasSpeckledPig,andtherewasBlunt,andlastandlonesome,
therewasRunt.Onedaythisherepigmother,sheknewthatshewasgoingtokickthebucket,andshetookand
calledupallherchildrenandtoldthemthatthetimehadcomewhentheyhadtolookoutforthemselves.Andthen
sheupandtoldthemasgoodasshecould,althoughherbreathwasmightyscant,aboutwhatabadmanoldBrer
Wolfwas.ShesaidthatiftheycouldescapefromoldBrerWolf,they'dbedoingmonstrouslywell.Notlongafter
that,sureenough,oldMissSowlaydownanddied,andallofthosechildrenofherswereflungbackonthemselves,
andtheywhirledin,theydid,andeachonebuilthimselfahousetolivein.BigPig,shetookandbuiltherselfa
houseoutofbrush.LittlePig,shetookandbuiltastickhouse.SpeckledPig,shetookandbuiltamudhouse.Blunt,
hetookandbuiltaplankhouse.AndRunt,shedidn'tmakeanygreattodo,andnogreatbrags,butshewentto
work,shedid,andbuiltarockhouse.Byandby,whentheyhadeverythingfixedup,andmattersweresortof
settled,earlyonemorningherecameoldBrerWolflickinghischopsandshakinghistail.Thefirsthousehecameto
wasBigPig'shouse.BrerWolfwalkeduptothedoor,hedid,andheknocked.ThiswokeupBigPig,andshecame
tothedoor,andsheaskedwhoitwas.BrerWolfalloweditwasafriend,andhesangout:Ifyou'llopenthedoorand
letmein,I'llwarmmyhandsandgohomeagain.BigPigaskedagainwhoitwas,andthenBrerWolfupandsaid,
"How'syourma?""Mymaisdead,"shesaid,"andbeforeshedied,shetoldmetokeepmyeyesonBrerWolf.Isee
youthroughthecrackinthedoor,andyoulookmightylikeBrerWolf."ThenoldBrerWolf,hedrewalongbreath,
likehefeltverybad,andthenheupandsaid,"Idon'tknowwhatchangedhermind,unlessshewasoutofherhead.
IheardtellthatoldMissSowwassick.Iknowmightwellthatifyourmawashererigh now,inherrightmind,
she'dtaketheroastingearsandbegladtogetthem,andmorethanthat,she'daskmeinbythefiretowarmmy
hands,"saidoldBrerWolf.ThetalkabouttheroastingearsmadeBigPig'smouthwater,andbyandby,aftersome
morepalaver,sheopenedthedoorandletBrerWolfin,andblessyoursoul,thatwasthelastofBigPig.Shedidn't
havetimetosqueal,ortogrunteither,beforeBrerWolfgobbledherup.ThenextdayoldBrerWolfputupthesame
gameonLittlePig.HewentandsanghissongandLittlePig,shetookandlethimin,andthenBrerWolfandhe
tookandreturnedthecomplimentsandletLittlePigin.LittlePig,sheletBrerWolfin,andBrerWolf,heletLittle
Pigin,andwhatmorecanyouaskthanthat?ThenexttimeBrerWolfpaidacall,hedroppedinonSpeckledPig,
andrappedatthedoor,andsanghissong:Ifyou'llopenthedoorandletmein,I'llwarmmyhandsandgohome
again.ButSpeckledPig,shekindofsuspectedsomething,andsherefusedtoopenthedoor.YetBrerWolfwasa
mightydeceitfulman,andhetalkedmightysoft,andhetalkedmightysweet.Byandby,hegothisnoseinthecrack
ofthedoor,andhesaidtoSpeckledPig,tojustlethimgetonepawin,andthenhewon'tgoanyfurther.Hegotthe
pawin,andthenhebeggedtogettheotherpawin,andthenwhenhegotthatin,hebeggedtogethisheadin,and
thenwhenhegothisheadin,andhispawsin,ofcourseallhehadtodowastoshovethedooropenandwalkright
in.Andwhenmattersstoodthatway,itwasn'tlongbeforehemadefreshmeatofSpeckledPig.Thenextday,hedid
awaywithBlunt,andthedayafterthatheallowedthathewouldmakeapassatRunt.Nowthen,rightthereiswhere
oldBrerWolfslippedup.HeislikesomefolksIknow.He'dhavebeenmightysmart,ifhehadn'tbeentoosmart.
Runtwasthelittlestoneofthewholegang,yetallthesame,thenewswasoutthatshewaspesteredwithsenselike
grownfolks.BrerWolf,hecreptuptoRunt'shouse,andhegotunderneaththewindow,hedid,andhesangout:If
you'llopenthedoorandletmein,I'llwarmmyhandsandgohomeagain.Butallthesame,BrerWolfcouldn'tcoax
Runttoopenthedoor,neithercouldhebreakin,becausethehousewasmadeofrock.ByandbyBrerWolfmade
outlikehe'dgoneoff,andafterawhilehecamebackandknockedatthedoor,blam,blam,blam!Runt,shesatby
thefire,shedid,andsortofscratchedherear,andholleredout,"Who'sthat?""It'sSpeckledPig,"saidoldBrer
Wolf,betweenasnortandagrunt."Ifetchedyousomepeasforyourdinner!"Runt,shetookandlaughed,shedid,
andholleredback,"SisSpeckledPitnevertalkedthroughthatmanyteeth."

BrerWolfwentoffagain,andbyandbyhecamebackandknocked.Runt,shesatonarockandholleredout,
"Who'sthat?""BigPig,"saidBrerWolf.Ifetchedsomesweetcornforyoursupper."Runt,shelookedthroughthe
crackunderneaththedoor,andlaughed,andsaid,"SisBigPigdidn'teverhaveanyhaironherhooves.Thenold
BrerWolf,hegotmad,hedid,andhesaidhewasgoingtocomedownthechimney.AndRunt,shesaidthatthat
wastheonlywaythathecouldgetin.AndthenwhensheheardBrerWolfclimbingupontheoutsideofthe
chimney,shetookandpiledupawholelotofbroomstrawinfrontofthehearth,andwhensheheardhimclimbing
downontheinside,shetookthetongsandshovedthestrawontothefire,andthesmokemadeBrerWolf'shead
swim,andhedroppeddown,andbeforeheknewit,hewasburnedtoacrackling.AndthatwasthelastofoldBrer
Wolf.AtleastitwasthelastofthatBrerWolf.

A wolf looking for food finds three pigs, each one having their own home made of straw, sticks
and finally, bricks. The wolf knocks on each door, threatening to blow their house down. The
pigs with the straw and sticks fall victim to the wolf's threat. The homeless pigs take refuge in
the third pig's house and the wolf is not able to blow the brick house down. Tired, the wolf gives
up and leaves.

Thethreepigsweresafeinthebrickhouse...untilthegovernmentfoundoutaboutthe
luxurybrickmansionandraisedpropertytaxes.Thethreelittlepigs,unabletofindajob
inabadeconomy,couldn'taffordthetaxes.Thegovernmentkickedthemout,thebank
tookoverandsoldthehouseasaforeclosedproperty,reapingwindfallprofits.Thebig
badwolf,whohadbeentrackingtheeconomicsituation,camebackfromthewoodsand
atethethreelittlehomelesspigs,endingtheirmisery

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs. Three Little
Pigs They each had a house made of different things. One
made of cookie dough, one made of gingerbread, and one
made of duct tape. One day, Godzilla decided to take a
small walk near the three little pigs' houses. Godzilla
made it to the first pig's house, which was the cookie
dough house. The first pig came out of the house and
said "you can't take down this house!" Unfortunately for
the little pig, Godzilla hated cookie dough, so he gobbled
the house up, leaving the little pig running to the other
little pig's house. Godzilla then made it to the second
pig's house which was the gingerbread house. He found
that the previous pig was also in the house. Both pigs
came out and yelled "you wouldn't dare destroy my
house!" Godzilla decided to take the challenge and
blasted it with his super blast. The two pigs ran away to
the last pig's house. Godzilla made it to the last house,
which was the duct tape house. At the sight of the duct
tape, he started feeling weak, and blew up.

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who lived with their mother in
a
meadow. One day the mother pig said to the three little pigs, "You need to go
out
into the world and make your own way." So they waved "goodbye" and out
into
the world they went.
The pigs decided to build houses near the woods. A big bad wolf lived in the
woods. He was not happy when he saw the three little pigs building houses
nearby.
The first little pig was lazy. He made a house of straw. The big bad wolf
huffed
and puffed and blew it down.
The second little pig worked a little harder than the first little pig. He made a
house of twigs. The big bad wolf huffed and puffed and blew the house down.
The third little pig made a house of bricks. The big bad wolf huffed and
puffed
and huffed and puffed. But the house did not fall down. This made the big
bad
wolf very, very angry. He went up on the roof and tried to get into the house
through the chimney. He climbed into the chimney and slid down into a pot
of
boiling water. He ran out of the house and never came back!

How hard did you find it to read? On a scale from one to 10.
What happened to the wolf?
What was your favorite part of the story?
_____ Will you tell us a little bit about your story? Will you tell us about your
experience reading it?
Imagine this was the same story for everyone, but with these same different
perceptions. How will you or have you handled this in your classroom.

How hard did you find it to read? On a scale from one to 10.
What happened to the wolf?
What was your favorite part of the story?
_____ Will you tell us a little bit about your story? Will you tell us about your
experience reading it?
Imagine this was the same story for everyone, but with these same different
perceptions. How will you or have you handled this in your classroom.