Appreciate and Attach Smile

Purpose:
This exercise is developed by my friend who is NLP HUNA practitioner Mr. Vikas Dixit and a
coordinator of our NLP / HUNA group. I have routinely used this exercise for me and my clients. I highly
recommend it to all to increase your happy state and reduce the cross effect of your stress between your
work and personal life. It is our usual observation that if we are under work pressure and stressed at
office, we tend to take the tensions and stress to our home. This in turn disturbs our peace and happiness
at home. At the worst it could also strain our relationship with spouse and children. We could also pass
this negative emotions and energies to others at home at the cost of their health. On the other hand, if we
are under pressure or emotionally disturbed due to issues at home, we tend to take the stress to our office.
This in turn disturbs our work efficiency at office. This exercise eliminates or at least reduces carrying the
stress from work to home and vice versa thus improves Work Life balance.
Besides this adverse effect of the cross emotional stress, this exercise also helps in associating happiness
with various things in the world. We know from our experience that we feel happy by seeing certain
objects like flowers, chocolates, pizza, waterfall etc. based on our taste and experience with these objects.
Similarly we feel very happy when we meet some people like grandparents, small babies, old time friends
etc. We also feel energized or peaceful when we listen to certain music. This happens instantly because
the happy feelings are attached to these stimuli. In NLP we call the stimuli as Anchors. So the happiness
programs in our subconscious mind are anchored with these things. The anchoring has taken place based
on our personal experiences, learnt experiences from others or even our vivid thinking. The exercise
Appreciate and Attach Smile anchors the happy feelings through smile to all the things that we
encounter in our daily life. Thus we bring happiness in our life in perpetuity. At the same time when we
do this exercise regularly our face is ready to smile most of the time. This spreads the happiness to others
when we meet them. This makes our interaction to other more effective and helps in developing rapport.
Also our image with others is enhanced.
Another important thing in this exercise is appreciating the things. We often notice that we are very
appreciative of things when we acquire new things e.g. LED TV, car, etc and very eager to show it to
others. Similarly we are very appreciative of our spouse when we are newly married or appreciative of
children when they are babies. After passage of some time we take these things for granted and dont even
notice them even these are same things and has same utility or value for us. As a result we miss lot of
happiness in our life. Our relations tend to become dry and lose the fun in life. If we maintain the habit of
appreciating things, rather goodness in every thing that we encounter in daily life, we derive the
associated happiness. When we appreciate others, we validate good things in them and as a result
stimulate energy to motivate them.
Technique Protocol:
For first few times you need to close your eyes while doing this exercise. Once you are familiar you can
also do this exercise with eyes open and doing some other activity like driving, travelling, waiting in a
queue, etc. The procedure given below is only suggestive and you can modify as per your situation.
1.
Sit quietly with eyes closed. Concentrate on your breath. Observe your chest movement or
stomach movement. Observe your breath. Let it become smoother. There is no need to go to alpha state
(hypnotic or dream state) of mind for this exercise. As long as your mind becomes compose and quite
with less clutter of thoughts is enough. As such when you are driving or travelling or waiting in a queue,
you are usually in a tranquil state. Once you are calm start the next step.

2.
Suppose you are going back from office to your home or about to start for your home, think of
your closed door or gate of your home. Appreciate its design, its utility for you as safe keeping your
property, etc. Smile looking at the door. Imagine the door or the gate is smiling at you in response and
welcoming you to your home. If you use staircase or elevator to reach your home, appreciate its design,
cleanliness and utility. You smile at it and imagine it reciprocate with a good smile.
3.
Now think that you have entered you home. Visualize moving through all the rooms one by one
including kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, terrace, etc. observing all the objects like shoe rack, sofa set, table,
dinning table, chairs, TV, artifacts, kitchen table, cupboards, beds, bathroom fittings, study table,
computer, and so on. Appreciate each object for its elegance, utility and service it provides to you. Smile
at each and imagine these objects reciprocate with a smile. You can visualize different types of smiles
depending on the objects. You can use your creativity like cartoons where the objects speak and also
smile.
4.
Once all objects are over; imagine your spouse comes and greets you. You appreciate his or her
beauty, smartness, dress, intelligence or something. You give a nice smile and see that your spouse
reciprocate with a smile (you could also add hug if wish). Then your children would come. Follow the
same procedure like spouse. Then visualize your relatives, neighbours, friends, servants, etc. come one by
one. You appreciate them one by one appropriately maintaining necessary formality or casualness while
appreciating. Then give a good smile at them and see they reciprocate with a warm smile.
5.
Once you finish the people you see normally in your daily life, you can continue with the exercise
for animals and nature around you like pets, birds, sky, clouds, sun, moon and so on. Follow your
subconscious. Whatever comes to your mind is ok. I some times see TV anchors and news readers that I
watch daily. Every time for every thing and for everybody you Appreciate and Smile. Also observe
reciprocal smile from them.
6.
Suppose you are going to office from your home or about to start for your office, think of the
entry point of your office and follow the exercise in similar way. Only difference you will now see your
desk, chair, office dcor, conference room, etc. and meet your colleagues, boss, subordinates, clients,
vendors, suppliers, seniors, etc. The process of Appreciating and smiling is similar. Also you must
visualize the reciprocal smile. Possibly there would be more formality in office situation than the home.
However, warmth in your smile and true feelings in your appreciation should be same.
Now open your eyes. Without thinking or pondering on the exercise just go to your home or office like
usual. After the exercise when you go to your home or office, you will find that your home or office is
different that day. It is much comfortable. People around are more friendly. Peace and happiness prevails.
People are much appreciative of you and are in a good mood. The things work much smoother for you.
Do the exercise twice a day once while going to office and once while returning to home. After few
days your subconscious would be conditioned to do the exercise for you without you consciously
thinking about it.
Conclusion:
Exercise Appreciate and Attach Smile frees you from the negative effects of emotions associated with
objects and people around you. The exercise would help you in dissociating your stressful interactions at
office and home. Thus it will help you in achieving a good Work Life balance. It brings back your
happy thoughts and memorable associations with objects and people around you.
I found this process given above worked very effectively (like a magic) on me as well as on many of my
clients and students. If you want to modify it slightly as per your convenience you may do so. Before
closing, I would like to narrate a story that changed my approach to work life balance. The story goes
like this.

One person with his family while driving on the highway got his car broke down. He called a mechanic
from a road side garage. It was getting dark. The mechanic told the vehicle owner that his last bus to his
home is about to go and so he must close the garage. He can repair the vehicle on the following day. After
lot of pleading the mechanic agreed to work. He worked for few hours till about mid night and repaired
the car. After he had just finished a rough day on the job without dinner, he started walking towards his
home on the dark road. The car owner offered to drive him home. On the way the mechanic sat in stony
silence.
On reaching his home the mechanic invited the car owner to come in to meet his family and have a cup of
tea. Mechanics family was waiting eagerly with worries on their faces. As they walked towards the front
door, the mechanic paused briefly at a tree, touching the tip of branch. When entering the door of his
house the mechanic underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was wreathed in smiles and
he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a hug. After a cup of tea the mechanic walked the car
owner to the car. As they passed the tree, with curiosity the car owner asked mechanic about what I he
had seen earlier about the mechanic touching the tree before entering his home.
Oh, that's my trouble tree," the mechanic replied. "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one
thing's for sure, those troubles don't belong in the home with my wife and the children. So I just hang
them up on the tree every night when I come home and ask God to take care of them. Then in the morning
I pick them up again. Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick them up,
there aren't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."
Whatever works is Magic, as they say.