I am the way I am today because of my influences nature and nurture.

Friends and
family. Time era. A lot of my behaviors today as my birthday today at 22 is present
because of translucent experiences. Even now im still alone. I have always been
alone. This may seem paradoxical but I have never been happier. I cant remember
a time where change was dire. This post traumatic growth is beautiful. Being part of
that endless loop of cognitive strains, psychological damage, verbally, physically,
mentally, spiritually devaluing. I have major trust issues, something I found out
about myself. Thats why I dont have many friends. I find it hard to make friends.
My intentions are pure, but my ability to connect with others have been severed.
Definitely having being part of a family that was divorced at a very young age for
my brothers and i. you would expect the people who gave you life was suppose to
love you unconditionally. Without fear or intimidation. I had that question to my
mom, as a susceptible child, you wouldnt think of trading your mother for someone
else. It is within reason that made the very essense of living hard to contemplate
with. When your own mother has made you feel that the world was cruel and cold.
Fading away would be better, because the cycle was never changing. Same shit
different day. Were things going to get better. Our brains are synchronically adept. I
learned this just this year. I dont care if its late. When a persons time has come, he
is called upon to lead himself into awakening and conscious of self and surrounding.
World and universe. You are who you attract. Its not what people want.
Your
perception of the universe is ultimately in your own hands. The kingdom of god is
within man himself. Energies become synergy within the path to singularity. That is
the true peace and love for life. The creation and matter of everything. But to be
human is to be flawed. Was our species inadvertently doomed to fail. Inevitably
going through unbalanced fluctuations of yin and yang. The world will never be
without opposite charges. We just got to respect the fact that there are a million
possibilities, we are part of a predestined map of, never knowing of what the future
holds, but we can guess at it, and prepare ourselves to make the most of our
potentials and capabilities. Thats where people lose themselves in the search for
power sex and money. Any of these things can be beautiful elements of life in terms
of the pursuit of happiness, to be virtuous within oneself. We cannot judge someone
elses life because it is different from ours. Hell is on earth, heaven is within the
mind. Our perception is key to that door to the kingdom of heaven. It would only
pull us as a whole forward. Leadership the dominant trait humans as apex species
of this planet have. The ability to learn and evaluate. How far we can advance as a
species as a whole, as a team, as a singular unit.

Our chase for love, security, self-esteem, and a sense of purpose. Ultimately self
actualized. To be human is to be sinful. There must be a balance. Mankind is flawed,
although interesting random concept of making artificial intelligence whose models
are flawless. Technology has blossomed to revolutionize the very neurological
wirings of our brain. We are evolving, but there must be a balance. Seven mind
altering traits that have written impactful history on the human timeline in such a
colossal time length of the birth of this planet: lust, gluttony, pride, wrath, greed,
envy, sloth

We cant but accept that this is part of human nature. Thats the realistic fact. It
wont decease. But it is how we deal with it that separates our ability to transcend
into an awakened being. Humans dont have instincts, we have basic drives. But our
purpose is reflection on our legacy to mark our leadership. How well we help others
achieve. We cannot choose perfectly how our destinies will be, but we can definitely
manifest it in a certain way to be the best we are capable of doing. Everyone has
their cap, once we reach that cap, we have to accept it. Not a single impurity in a
euphoric state knowing you did your absolute best to become the best you can. No
one can take away your heart, except for yourself. They can sure influence your
decision on whether to give up or not. But at the end of the day, you are author of
your own life. i accepted who I am, and will continue to learn more about myself and
the way I learn. Similar energies, frequencies, wavelengths, that our consciousness
omits is very contagious. humans can network through each other just like how own
neurons send signals to each other to pass information. We are connected, just like
our synapses. It is inevitable that you get what you deserve. Arrange your aura in a
way where you have a better chance of becoming what you were always meant to
be, a unique individual with a sense of purpose.

This is what I understand, this is how I broke down the world through my perception,
the conclusions of ideas and spectacles from my observations of life unfolding in its
infinitive possibilities. I dont have many friends, but when I do make a friend, i
believe it is a purposeful bond of learning. All my friends have inspired me and
influenced me some way. I got to see what other peoples behaviors are like, I got to
see their perception on the world. Everyone has a different mind, great minds think
alike, but never the same entirely. We love and accept for who they are. Everyone I
have attracted in my life has brought me a lesson, somehow some way, I will find it,
and I will transgress it into my file cabinet of observations.