Michael J.

Franklin

How can you tell if someone is lying?

How can you tell if someone isn’t telling you the truth?

Today there seems to be no shortage of incredibly skilled liars.

There aren’t only the Bernie Madoffs, Ulrich Englers and
Jeffrey Skillings of the planet. Rather under most
circumstances, we don’t know whether people are right or
wrong. We all have a little larceny in us and tend to tell those
"little white lies".

According to a University of Virginia study conducted in

1996: Lying is part of the human condition. Over the course
of one week 147 participants, aged 18 to 71, were asked to
record in their diaries all of their social interactions and all of
the lies they told. On average, each person lied just over 10
times and only seven people claimed to have been
completely honest.
Michael J. Franklin

Let‘s look at it this way, most of the time we're just trying to
be thoughtful. If your wife, girlfriend or partner asks if you
enjoyed a dinner she cooked, most husbands, boyfriends and
partners who know what's good for them…say, "It was very
good!" It’s these "false positive" lies that are delivered 10 to
20 times more often than the truth that the meal sucked.
Another study indicted that men and women tend to lie with
equal frequency, though women are more likely to lie to make
other people feel a good, while men tend to lie to make
themselves look better.

We lie less frequently to the people that are closest to us.

So, the burning question is: How to know when someone's trying to sell you a can of fresh
mountain air?

Traditional polygraph tests have been around since the early 1900s. The technique uses sensors to
detect fluctuations in blood pressure, pulse, respiration in response to direct questions. There are
fundamentally two problems with polygraphs: one, they only work about 80 per cent of the time,
two and most importantly, it's not like you’re going to carry all that hardware to a meeting or to a
Michael J. Franklin

bar. Hence, you’re going to have to rely on your own skills and warning signals. Remember, if it
sounds too good to be true, chances are…well you know!

While there actually is no 100 percent way to expose a liar, there are some very helpful tactics for
uncovering people who probably aren’t telling the truth.

Some valuable tips to realize that you’re not getting the truth are:

• Liars tend to give short or one-word responses to questions,

• whereas, people telling the truth are more likely to talk a lot
more about the question that was asked.

• In other studies, liars tend to provide much fewer details and

use fewer words than an honest person and liars tend to talk
for a smaller percentage of any conversation time.

• Skilled liars don't break out in a sweat, but the rest of us tend
to get fidgety and uncomfortable.
Michael J. Franklin

There are some possible "give aways" for those who aren’t being truthful:

1. Shifty and constantly moving eyes. The person can’t maintain a fixed eye contact with you.

2. Their voices have a higher vocal pitch.

3. They start to perspire.

4. Their breathing becomes heavier.

Warning: Not everyone who can’t look you in the eye is a liar!

There are some behavioral traits, like averting eye contact that could be cultural and not indicative
of a liar

Liars tend to be reluctant to admit storytelling mistakes. When honest people tell stories, they may
realize halfway through that they left out some details and might backtrack to fill in holes. They also
may realize a previous statement wasn't quite right and go back and explain further. Liars, on the
Michael J. Franklin

other hand, are worried that someone might catch them in a lie and are reluctant to admit even the
slightest imperfections.

Other important clues are: liars tend to use imprecise pronouns. To psychologically distance
themselves from a lie, people often embellish their tales with second and third-person pronouns
like "you," "we" and "they". Liars are also more likely to ask that questions be repeated and begin
responses with phrases like, "to tell you the truth, " "honestly" and "to be perfectly honest”.

When people are telling the truth, they tend to make hand gestures to the rhythm of their speech.
Gestures emphasizing points or phrases are a natural and compelling technique when they actually
believe the points they're making. The less certain tend to keep their hand gestures to a minimum.

The mode of communication matters as well. Studies show that we are less likely to lie face-to-face
than over the phone or the Web. We only have to look at our own Internet and email exchanges to
see how often we tell those little fibes.

According to the study, would we ever come clean if we had the chance? Not likely, because 75
percent of those studied stated that they would lie again if given the opportunity and the chance of
being caught was reduced.
Michael J. Franklin

Six ways to catch a liar:

1. Stalling curious questions

Liars are more likely to ask that questions be repeated and answer questions with, "to tell you the
truth,", "honestly" and "to be perfectly honest." You should be alerted at those who give extremely
evasive answers to direct questions.

2. Long stories and the telephone

There is something about the phone that seems to

bring out the liar in us all. In a one week long study
of 30 college students, the phone was the most
popular choice, with 37% of the lies told in this time,
versus 27% during face-to-face exchanges, 21% using
web-based messaging and just 14% via email. This
shouldn’t come as a surprise as most phone calls
don't leave a record behind. Go figure.
Michael J. Franklin

3. Very thin facts

Liars, most amateur ones, haven’t had the opportunity to think through all the particulars details of
their stories. If you suspect you're being lied to, make more direct inquiries…but try not to let them
know that you’re on to them.

4. Uncomfortable gaps or pauses in conversations

When people are lying, the gaps between their words often increase. While honest people have the
truth locked and loaded, liars tend to take more time between points. No doubt they’re looking for
an approach that will be the most convincing.

5. A liar’s lack of cooperation

Used car salesmen, politicians, insurance salesmen and bankers notwithstanding, people generally
don't like to lie. It makes them uncomfortable, even aggressive. A truthful person is concerned,
composed and sincere; a liar is often defensive, guarded and much less cooperative.
Michael J. Franklin

6. A liar needs to be right

When honest people tell stories, they may realize partway through that they left out some details
and backtrack to fill in holes. They also may realize a previous statement wasn't quite right and go
back and explain further.

Liars, on the other hand, stick to their stories as they are worried that someone might catch them in
a lie.