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Individualist
Identity seekers, who feel unique and different
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Finding Oneself:
Fours will probably agree with most of statements:
1. I have the sense of something missing from life.
2. I try to look casual and natural.
3. I have always had an attraction for symbolism.
4. People don't feel as deeply as I do.
5. I like to do things properly and with class.
6. My environmental surroundings are very important to me.
7. It's easy for me to distinguish between "the best," and "the best
known."
8. I don't like to think of myself as being ordinary or having an
ordinary problem.
9. I find myself swinging back and forth between highs and lows.
Either I'm very up or very down, I don't feel very alive when I'm in
the middle.
10.People have accused me of being overly dramatic, but they really
don't understand how I feel.
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Path of development:
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Accept that wholeness and realness exist now in the present moment
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Do not pay so much attention to your feelings; they are not a true source of support
for you, as you probably already know. Remember this advice: "From our present
perspective, we can also see that one of the most important mistakes Fours make is
to equate themselves with their feelings. The fallacy is that to understand
themselves they must understand their feelings, particularly their negative ones,
before acting. Fours do not see that the self is not the same as its feelings or that the
presence of negative feelings does not preclude the presence of good in themselves"
(Personality Types, p. 172). Always remember that your feelings are telling you
something about yourself as you are at this particular moment, not necessarily more
than that.
Avoid putting off things until you are "in the right mood." Commit yourself to
productive, meaningful work that will contribute to your good and that of others, no
matter how small the contribution may be. Working consistently in the real world will
create a context in which you can discover yourself and your talents. (Actually, you
are happiest when you are workingthat is, activating your potentials and realizing
yourself. You will not "find yourself" in a vacuum or while waiting for inspiration to
strike, so connectand stay connectedwith the real world.
Self-esteem and self-confidence will develop only from having positive experiences,
whether or not you believe that you are ready to have them. Therefore, put yourself
in the way of good. You may never feel that you are ready to take on a challenge of
some sort, that you always need more time. (Fours typically never feel that they are
sufficiently "together," but they must nevertheless have the courage to stop putting
off their lives.) Even if you start small, commit yourself to doing something that will
bring out the best in you.
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Type 4. Romantic
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Fours as Parents
are good at helping their children get in touch with their feelings
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Need for self-understanding -> examine self -> understand themselves -> Need for selfunderstanding
In the healthy state, the need for self-understanding induces Type Fours to allow their
emotions to surface and examine these emotions in order to understand themselves.
When Fours achieve self-understanding, their need is satisfied and a balance is reached.
In the average state, when Fours' do not examine closely their emotions, they start to not
understand themselves. This increases the need for self-understanding, which helps
Fours to again examine themselves. Thus the balancing loop can help Fours to recover.
Fear of being defective -> indulge in fantasy -> understand themselves -> Fear of being
defective
In the unhealthy state, the basic fear of being defective can cause Type Fours to ignore
their true selves, allow their emotions to overwhelm them, and indulge in wild fantasy
about themselves. This means they will understand themselves even less, and further
increases Fours' basic fear. The cycle continues to build up.
Insight:
We can see from the diagram that a way to help break the control of the basic fear is to
weaken the unhealthy loop. Fours can refrain from indulging in fantasy and start
examining themselves. This will help Fours to understand themselves, and reduce the
fear of being defective.
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