6/19/2015

DIRECT WORK WITH CHILDREN

Enable the child to understand significant events in

the past.

Confront feelings that are secondary to these events.

Become more fully involved in the future planning
of their lives.

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Communicating with Children

Goal: Find techniques that a particular child
can most easily use to share information

Communication occurs via a variety of senses and not

limited to verbal interchanges
Adults need to be flexible
Find a technique that works
Tools used depend upon the childs age, stage of
development and details of childs situation

Communicating with Children

Goal: Find techniques that a particular child
can most easily use to share information

Communication occurs via a variety of senses and not

limited to verbal interchanges

Adults need to be flexible

Find a technique that works
Tools used depend upon the childs age, stage of
development and details of childs situation

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Attention to Detail: Site selection &

Who is present
Tools used depend upon the childs age, stage of
development and details of childs situation

Under age 3:

Childs home environment and having a

known adult close by are important.

Preschoolers:
Can easily tolerate short separations from
caregivers. Parental figure indicates it is okay for
child to be with non-family member. Setting
should include familiar type toys.

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School age:
Settings other than traditional office setting playroom,
traveling in a car. May have too many distractions in a park
or restaurant. Others may disrupt conversation. May want
to plan an outing to a particular place to trigger memories.
If talking around a table, using structured paper/pencil
tasks, play materials or games puts children more at ease
than just sitting and talking.

Adolescents:
Usually communicate more openly in their room rather than
in other areas of the house. Help them fully explore issues
by seeing there are at least two sides to every issue. Look at
the pros and cons/plusses and minuses of a decision. By
inviting input into both sides modeling good decisionmaking. Expand their thinking from either/or to include a
variety of options between the two extremes.

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5 Steps in Disengagement Work

Kay Donley

1. Accurately reconstruct the childs placement history.

2. Identify various attachment figures.
3. Decide who were the most powerful of these figures in
influencing childs perception of self and others.

4. Gaining the cooperation of the most significant attachment

figure available.

5. Having that person give the child permission to become a

member of another family.

DEVELOPING A
LIFEBOOK

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What is a Lifebook?
A lifebook is a compilation of a childs journey through
time, usually from birth to present, with a look into the
future.

Included in the lifebook are memorabilia, writings, photos

and reflections that chronicle the childs history and
experiences. The book should allow the child to develop a
personalized record of who he is, where he came from,
and where he is going.

What is a Lifebook?
It is especially helpful for children who have had more than
one foster placement and are now moving into an adoptive
family.

There is no one way to make a lifebook. However, a strong,

loose-leaf format can work well, allowing for additions as
well as a lot of wear and tear.

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Whose Job Is It to See That A Lifebook

Gets Done?

A lifebook is usually put together by a child

with the child welfare worker, therapist, birth
parent, foster parent, adoptive parent or
guardian, along with help and input from other
significant adults in the childs life.

The following model for structuring a

lifebook includes six sections:
All About Me,
Birth Family,
Foster Family,
School,
Feelings, and
Adoption.

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All About Me
The all about me section involves gathering fun,
interesting facts and knowledge about the child.

We begin to identify and explore Who Am I?

Its time to discuss likes and dislikes, favorite
things, and important people.

Birth Family
Children who are removed from their family have a right to
as much knowledge and factual information about their
parents as possible. Depending on the age and other factors
at the time of separation, some children have little or no
conscious memory of their interactions with their birth
parents.

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Foster Family
We discuss in detail why the child is not living with their
family of birth and talk about how it has felt to move from
house to house, and live with different families. Often,
children cannot remember their birth parents, so it is
difficult to grieve for them. Most children have a special
foster family that they lovingly remember.

School

Regardless of the childs age, school is a large and important part of

the childs intellectual AND social development. This section is a
place to discuss peer relationships that worked, those that didnt,
and why.

When a child is feeling unclear about their past and not quite
comfortable with their foster family, school can become the only
stable relationship in their life. This may be the only part of their life
where they feel any control. Accompanying the child back to visit
and photograph their old school helps to strengthen the trust level
and relationship between child and adult.

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Feelings

There must be a trusting relationship between the child

and the worker who is sharing data with the child. The
childs worker is the most suitable person to prepare the
child because the worker is familiar with the case record
and has had regular contacts with the child.

Adoption
The facts about adoption need to be included regardless if
there is a potential adoption match or not. The goal of this
section is to teach the child clearly that a move from a foster
home to an adoptive home is very different. The worker
carefully teaches this section of the lifebook, taking a lot of
time to ensure that the child understands that adoption is a
gradual but permanent transition into a family who will
ALWAYS be his or her family.

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Other Helpful Tools

Family Tree Project
Genogram
Ecomap
Genogram

ADOPTION RITUALS
Possible outcomes of adoption rituals may include . . .

Releasing feelings of grief, anger and confusion toward a

situation or person

Putting memories in place in place so that they dont interfere

with efforts to create a new family

Changing the environment

Joining people together in new roles

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Key Elements to Consider

Time of day
Morning, afternoon and night all have symbolic meanings.
Season
Can signify different themes.
May want to link to a holiday or anniversary.
Place
Ceremonies can be private or public. Scenery may enhance the
impact.

Key Elements to Consider cont.

Witnesses
May include a role for everyone or for only a few.
Decide beforehand what each persons role will be.

Setting
The environment sets the stage. Consider colors, odors and sounds.

Food
sharing of food can symbolize families relying on one another.

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Key Elements to Consider cont.

Leadership
Must have someone to lead. Clergy, family members or close
friends may be appropriate choices.

Child Involvement
Children should have an active role in the ceremony so they can
define their role in the family

Key Elements to Consider cont.

Distinctiveness

The ritual should be initiated and presented in a way that

separates it from other events of the day.
Closure

Should have a planned closing that clearly indicates the end of

the event.

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ENTRUSTMENT RITE
(Within the Eucharistic Celebration)

Introductory Rite
Presentation of Maria Isabellas Biography
Ms. Maria Charisma Cid
Sending-off Message
Ms. Kamil Garcia
Words of Entrustment from the Administrator
Sr. Maria Socorro Pilar G. Evidente, D.C.
Words of Acceptance from the Adoptive Parents

Mr. Jose Francisco Vicent Frances and

Mrs. Maria Angeles Albero Tortosa
Signing of the Covenant
Mr. & Mrs. Vicent, Sr. Evidente, DC
and Ms. Josefina M. Dimalaluan
Liturgy of the Word
1st Reading: Ms. Marjorie

Rongalerios
Mr. Ricardo Carlos Quilaneta
Mass Presider : Fr. Francisco Kiko Magnaye, CM
Emcee: Mr. Joseph Marquez
Prayers of the Faithful:

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Thank You!

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