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MOREABOUTNONVERBALCOMMUNICATIONS
AdamBlatner,M.D.

Part2:USINGEXPERIENTIALMETHODSOFLEARNING

(RevisedAugust1,2002)

AsmentionedinPart1theoverviewonnonverbalcommunicationsitishelpfulfor
peopletolearnaboutthisdimensionofhumanbehavior.ThispaperisPart2buildingon
Part1,andwilldiscusssomewaysthatcanbeachieved.

Oneelementissimplylearningtheinformation,settingupthecategoriesinthemind,
gettingorientedtotheproblem.Butmuchofthelearningneedstobethroughgetting
the"feel"ofit,by"doing"thesebehaviors,andvaryingthem.Roleplayingaderivative
ofpsychodramaisanaturalandespeciallyeffectivewaytolearnthisskill.Forexample,
youcanonlyteachastronautsaboutlearningtogetaboutinzerogravitybyactually
simulatingtheexperienceinspecialflightsofairplanes,etc.Theremightbesome
preliminarybriefings,lectures,readingsofothers'experiences,andthatmayreducethe
senseofdisorientationbeforeithappens,buttheactuallearninghappensonlyinthe
"doing."Roleplayingisthesimulationmethodforinterpersonalskilllearning.

Theroleplayingtechniquesofenactment,rolereversal,doubling,themirror,replay,
andothersallofferavarietyofexperiential"viewpoints"forbringingsuchsubtlebody
languagesintosharperawareness.ItisworthwhiletorefertoPart1whilereading
throughthispaper,whichcomplementsPart1byshowinghowgainingthissensitivity
andawarenessmaybepracticed.Let'srestateagainthoughthemajorcategoriesof
nonverbalcommunications:

personal
eyecontact position
space

posture paralanguage expression

gesture touch locomotion

pacing adornment context

physiologic
responses

Learningaboutthisdimensionisgoodforpeoplehelpers,therapists,thosewhoneedin
thelongruntoteachpeoplehowtolearnaboutthisdimension!Butinaddition,I
envisionthisbeingtaughtinhighschool,college,professionaltraining,management
training,etc.aspartofanycurriculumofsocialandemotionallearning!

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Forpsychologists,learningaboutnonverbalcommunicationsgoesfurtherinhelping
therapistsunderstandthemanyleveleddynamicsofinterpersonalfunctioning.For
clientsorpatientsintherapy,theybecomemoreempowered,psychologicallyminded
andselfaware!SoIthinksomecomponentofthiskindoflearningwouldbeapowerful
adjuncttoanyholistictherapeuticapproach.(Perhapsaweekendworkshopforclients
inindividualorfamilytherapy?)

Somepsychotherapistshaveusedvideotapeplaybacktopromotesomeinsightabout
thedynamicsexpressedthroughnonverbalcommunications,butthatapproach
requirestechnicalequipmentandthetimetosetitup,someonetorunit,andoftena
gooddealoftimespentinreviewingthenoneditedtapes.Happily,roleplaying
techniquescanoftenachievemuchthesameresultwithoutthesedisadvantagesor
hindrances.

Also,theprocessofexploringproblemsinthisexperientialfashionoftenevokesa
greaterdegreeofgroupcohesionaspeopleworktogethertostageandcommentonthe
interactions.Thereareelementsofnovelty,playfulnessandartisticchallengein
enactingscenes,whichfurtherbuildsagreaterdegreeofinvolvement.

RolePlayingTechniques

Oftenpeoplecannoteasilyunderstandtheimpactofthenonverbalcommunications
involvedinasituationunlessitisreplayedandpointedout.Forthis,theroleplaying
techniquecalled"themirror"isofteneffective.(AsInotedbefore,thesetechniquesare
actuallypsychodramatechniques,whichI'vewrittenaboutinmybooksonthesubject.)
(Blatner,1996).Anindividual'sbehaviorissimplyportrayedbyanothergroupmember.
Thedirectorasksothersinthegroupiftheportrayalwasaccurate,andifnot,the
behaviorisreplayedagainuntilsomeconsensusisgainedregardingitsclosenesstothe
originalbehavior.Thepersonwhodisplayedthebehaviortobeginwith,theonegetting
thefeedback,isthusabletoseehows/hehadbeenbehaving.

Anothervariationofthisisthatofrolereversal,inwhichtheprotagonist,theperson
whoseproblemisthefocusofthegroupatthemoment,changespartswithanother
groupmember(the"auxiliary")whoplaystheroleoftheothercharacterinthe
protagonist'sscene.Whentheauxiliary,intheroleoftheprotagonist,repeatsthe
behavior,theprotagonistintheroleoftheotherpersoninthesceneexperiencesthe
impactofthatbehavior.Whetherit'smanipulativecoyness,subtleintimidation,
helplessness,passiveaggressiveness,orothertypesofinterpersonalrelatedness,the
protagonistishelpedtoownthemeaning(atleasttoothers)ofhisorherownactions.

Themostpowerfultechnique,though,isthatofexaggeration.Whateverslight
elementisbeingexpressed,tobringattentiontoit,havetheprotagonistexaggeratethe
movementorvoiceelement.Thisexaggerationcanberepeatedatanevengreater
magnification,andthenexaggeratedyetanotherdegreegreater.Inthesemore
expressivemovementsoramplifiedstates,theunderlyingaffectandpossiblythehidden
assumptionorattitudetendstocomemoresharplyintoawareness.

Arelatedtechniqueisthatofvariationdoingiteitherintheoppositewayorinanother
way.Theresultingcontrastsmayagainbringabehavior'shiddenmeaningintosharper
awareness.

LearningbyDoing

Aswereviewthemaincategoriesofnonverbalcommunications,someteaching
exerciseswillbesuggested,thebettertohighlighttheexperiencesbeinglearned.More,
thepointistosuggesttothereaderthatyouusetheseideasmainlyasstimulantsto
yourowncreativityinexploringthevariousbehaviors.(IfIhadtoworkoutanexercise

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foreveryelement,itcouldfillalargeandratherboringbookboringbecauseit'sbestto
inventtheexerciseasyouexperienceitindoingyourownroleplayingprocesses.)

Asthemajorcategoriesofnonverbalbehaviorarebrieflydescribed,someexperiential
exerciseswillbenotedthatmighthelpinlearningabouttheirvariations.Thekeytothe
skillofbeingobservantliesinknowingwhattolookfor.Itmaybehelpfulatfirstto
exaggerateagivenbehavior,andthentograduallyexpressitinincreasinglymore
subtlefashions.

CategoriesofNonverbalCommunications(PracticalExercises)

YoumightwanttocomparethissectionwithPart1,whichdescribessomeofthemain
elements.Thissectionwillsuggestsomeexercisesyoucando:

PersonalSpace:Referringtothecomfortableoruncomfortabledistancebetween
people,experimentwithothergroupmembers,usingyourintuitiontosay"stop"when
othersmovetowardsorawayfromyou.However,ifthoseothersplaythepartsof
parents,lovers,orchildren,explorewhichkindsofclosenessfeelappropriate.Then
imaginetheotherpersontobefromaquiteforeignculture,andsenseintoyour
acceptablepersonalspace.Compareyourownrepertoireofallowabledistanceswith
othersinthegroup.

EyeContact:Experimentwithdifferenttimesforglancing,gazing,andstaring.One
cankeepcontactfor2secondsor20seconds.Whendoesitfeel"right"andwhendoesit
becomeintrusive?Experimentalsowiththefrequencyofmakingeyecontact.Onecan
lookaway,andthenlookatthepersonevery5seconds,holdingthatgazeasmentioned
aboveforvaryinglengthsoftimeorperhapslookatthepersononlyeveryminuteor
so.Atwhatpointdoesitbecomeflirtatiousorspooky?

Position:Here'sanexerciseIlearnedfromthepsychodramateacherLeonFineinthe
mid1960s:Setupaninteraction,say,betweenaparentandachild.Playthescenefirst
ata90degreeangle,then,carryingonwiththeparentstandingandthechildsitting.
Continuethesceneasthechildturnshisorherbacktotheparent.Thenfurtherpursue
theinteractionwiththeparentsittingandthechildstanding,facingeachother.Finish
thedialoguewithbothpeoplestandingfacetoface.Othervariablesmaybecombined.
Howdoesitfeelfortheparentorthechildwhentheparentstandsbehindorbehind
andslightlytothesidewiththehandsrestinggentlyontheshoulders?Notehow
certainpositionstendtogeneratecorrespondingattitudes.

Posture:Trywalkingaroundwiththepelvistilteddownandforward,asifthrusting
thegenitalareaforwardwithatighteningofthebuttocks.Thenshiftpositiontoit
opposite,drawingbackthegenitalarea,tiltingthebuttocksrearward.Notehowthe
formerpostureencouragesaswagger,whilethelattergeneratesatendencytotake
mincingsteps.

Talkanddiscoverwhatfacialexpressionsandauxiliaryposturesandmovementsgo
withajawthrustforward.Whataboutthejawsubtlyretracted?Notethatthis
aggressivevssubmissivestanceisexperiencedinternallyaswellasinterpersonally,as
aremostothernonverbalbehaviors.

Asmentionedearlier,experimentwithdifferentanglesoftheheadontheneck,cocked
slightlyorsignificantlytooneside,turnedsothatone'sglanceisfromthecornerofone's
eye,thrustforwardorpulledback.

Movearoundwiththeshoulderspulledback,andthendrawnforward,notingthe
appearanceofothersinthedifferentposition(oroneselfinamirrororonvideotape),
andalsothefeelingsassociatedwiththesetwopositions.It'shardtobedepressedwith

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theshoulderspulledback.Notealsothatmanyoftheseshiftscanbealmost
imperceptible,yetstillhaveanimpactonothersandinone'sownbeing.

Paralanguage:Howyousaysomethingcanmakeallthedifferenceintheworld!
Inflection(rising,falling,flat...)
Pacing(rapid,slow,measured,changing...)
Intensity(loud,soft,breathy,...)
Tone(nasal,operatic,growling,wheedling,whining...)
Pitch(high,medium,low,changes...)
Pauses(meaningful,disorganized,shy,hesitant...)

TheTechniqueof"Gibberish"

Otherexercisestobedescribedmaybeenactedmoreeffectivelywithoutactually
havingtoimproviseadialogue.Thisinvolvesthegenerationofapseudolanguage,a
gibberish,madeof"dadamyamyablahblahblah"ratherthanrealwords.Playwith
havingconversationsinthis"glossolalia"formit'salsoagoodexerciseforspontaneity
training.Thevocalinflectionsarethekey,especiallyastheyareassociatedwithfacial
expressionandgesture.Thevalueofthis"generic"languageisthatyoudon'thaveto
createactualmeaningfulconversation,achallengewhichmaydistractyoufromthe
pointoftheexercise.

So,justmakeupagroupofsounds,gibberish,asifyouwerespeakingsomeexotic
foreignlanguage,andletyouremphasisbethroughyoujugglingthevariablesmentioned
above.Workingwithapartner,tryexpressingyourselfseductively,coyly,surprised,
irritated,etc.,andrespondtoyourpartner'sbehavior.Thendiscusswhetheryou
interpretedeachothers'messagesaccurately.You'llbegintonoticethepowerofthese
elementsofspeech.Usingparalanguagefreesyoutonoticethesubtletiesoffeelings
associatedwithnonverbalcommunications.You'lldiscoverthatanotinsignificant
componentofwhathasbeencalled"intuition"inourcultureisthesubconscious
awarenessofthemeaningculturegivestovariousnonverbalcommunications.Because
thisisnotgenerallymadeexplicitinthecourseoftraditionaleducation,itremains
beyondthegraspofordinary"leftbrain"consciousness.Workinginpairs,playwith
differenttypesofdistance,eyecontact,andposition.Havegroupmembersnoticeother
variablesnotmentionedinthispaper.

FacialExpression:Usingcombinationsofmusclesaroundtheforehead,eyes,mouth,
thetiltofthehead,eyegaze,andjaw,hundredsofsubtleexpressionsmaybeformed.
Usetheactor'stechniqueofstandinginfrontofamirrorwhileyouexplorethedifferent
kindsofexpressionsmentionedinPart1andenactthesesothatyoucanclearly
demonstratethedifferencestoyourself.Droopingorliftingyoureyelids,tighteningthe
musclesaroundyoureyesorlips,andnumerousotherphysicalexpressionscan
significantlyalteryourexpression.(Noticealso,asmentionedinPart1,thatthese
expressionsandotherbehaviorsactuallychangethewayyoufeelinsideyoucanalmost
sensethe"attitude"andsometimeseventhevoiceandvoicetoneandcharacteristic
wordsthatgowithanexpression,gesture,posture,etc.)

Also,theseexercisesandlearningprocessescanbeevenmoreeffectivewhenexplored
withinagroupsettingassumingacontextoftrust,playfulness,andmutualrespecthas
beenestablished.

Gesture:Similarly,explorethefeelingsinvolvedindoingorperceivingsomeofthe
following:clenchingfistshakingafingerpointing...etc.
(UsethelistunderthissectioninPart1.)
Recognizingthatsomeofthesearemorecultureboundthanothers,donot
presumetoknowwhatexpressionsorgesturesmean,butnoticethebehavior,attempt
tomakeitexplicitbytranslatingthegestureintospokenlanguage,andthencheckout

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whatthegesturemeanstothedifferentpeoplepresentThisisespeciallyimportantif
someonereactsinanunexpectedfashion.

Touch:Asanexercise,haveonepersoninyourgrouptakeanotherbythewristto
drawhimforwardcomparethattoagentleorfirmgriponthebackoftheupperarm,
orontheshoulder,orinthemiddleoftheback.Isthegestureapushoratug?Isthe
touchclosertoapat,arub,oragrabbing?Experimentindyadswithdifferentformsof
personalcontact,makingclearboundarieswhensomebehaviorfeelslikeit'sbecoming
uncomfortable.

Locomotion:TryoutthevariousmodesoflocomotionmentionedinPart1andnotice
whatideastheygenerate,whatfeelings,attitudes,impressions:
slithercrawltotterswagger,etc.

Pacing:Toappreciatethisvariable,chooseanactionsuchasextendingyourhand
forward,andperformthemovementseveraltimes.Eachtimechangethequalitytoone
ofthese(asmentionedinPart1)...jerkypressurednervousgradual,etc.

Also,tryoutvaryingyour"latencyofresponse."Tryansweringaquestionwithabit
moredelaythanyouwouldordinarilyextendthatsubtlepauseevenlonger,and
observewhatitdoestotheconversation.

Adornment:Tryhavingavarietyofhatsandwatchingthesenseofrolethatcomes
withthehat,letthehatsuggesttheassociatedbehavior.AlthoughI'mgenerallyinfavor
ofarelinquishmentofthecigaretteasavehiclefornonverbalcommunication,Imust
confessthatthedifferentwayspeoplemightcarryorbrandishtheseexpressionsof
"coolness,"style,representedstrongsemioticstatements.Tryoutdifferentways,like
thatcaricatureoftheNaziinterrogatingofficerholdingthecigarettepalmupbetween
thethumbandforefinger.Experimentwithyourglasses,oracane,etc.

Context:Havethegroupmovethechairsintodifferentpositions:Classroomstyle,with
thegroupleaderatthefrontandeveryonelinedupinrows.Inacircle,ahalfcircle.
Chairsatrandom,somemoreforward,somemorepulledbackPlaywiththelighting.
Experimentandseehowthingsfeel!

PhysiologicalResponses:AsnotedinPart1,thesecan'teasilybepracticed.But
somecanbemimicked.Sodowhatyoucan.

OtherWaysofLearningaboutNonverbalCommunications

Overthelastseveraldecadesanumberofmethodsoftherapyhavebeendeveloped
whichofferexperienceswhichhelpstudentsbecomemoresensitivetotherichnessof
thenonverbaldimensionofinterpersonalrelationships(Fine,1959).AlbertPesso's
"psychomotortherapy,"AlexanderLowen's"bioenergeticanalysis,"ArthurJanov's
"primaltherapy,"thefieldofdanceandmovementtherapy,andother"body"therapies
allincreasebodyawareness(Marrone,1990,Blatner,2000,p.133).Someapproaches,
suchasMosheFeldenkreis'approachorthatofF.M.Alexanderhaveapplications
primarilybeyondthecontextofpsychotherapyskillsinmanagingone'sownbodymore
consciouslymaybeconsideredtobepartofwhattheeducatedpersonwillwanttoknow
inthecomingyears.

RecentstudiesofthehypnotictechniquesofMiltonEricksonandthemethodsofother
masterpsychotherapistsledtothedevelopmentofapproacheswhichnotesubtletiesof
eyemovement,breathing,andothernonverbalcues(Bandler&Grinder,1975).Itwas
alsonotedthatdifferentpeopleseemmoresensitivetocertainmodesofperception,so
thatsomereactmoretovisualcues,otherstoauditorycues,andstillotherstotheirown
internalkinestheticorfeelingcues.Thus,theimpactofaperson'svoicetoneorfacial

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expressionalsovariesaccordingtothetemperamentoftherecipientofthe
communication.

Summary

Peoplereacttotheunspoken,asmuch(ifnotmore)tohowsomethingissaidastowhat
aretheexplicitmeaningofthewords.Misunderstandingscanoftenbeclarifiedifthe
peopleinvolvedhavetheabilitytonoticeandcommentonthenonverbal
communicationsinaninteraction.Psychodramaticmethods,especiallythoseof
enactment,replay,mirroring,doubling,rolereversal,coachingandroletraining,are
effectivevehiclesfordevelopingthiskindofawareness.

Therapistsneedtolearntherangeofnonverbalbehaviorsinordertodiagnosetheoften
subtledynamicsofthesituationandthepeopleinvolved.Thesenonverbalactionsoffer
cluestotheunderlyingdefenses,mixedfeelings,anddisownedintentions.Cotherapists
andtheclientsthemselvesalsobenefitfromthisawareness,becausetheabilityto
commentonthenonverbalcommunicationsinaninteractionallowsparticipantsto
modifytheprocessofproblemsolvingaswellasaddressingthe"content"oftheissues
themselves.

Thefieldofnonverbalcommunicationshasgrownrapidlyoverthelastfewdecades,and
ithasapplicationsinbusiness,media,internationalrelations,education,andindeedany
fieldwhichsignificantlyinvolvesinterpersonalandgroupdynamics.Anoverviewofthis
fieldwasnotedinPart1onthiswebsite.Certainlythereisaneedformorepsychological
mindednessinalltheserealms,andthetechniquesofexperientialeducationoffer
invaluabletoolsforthebuildingofsocialskills.

REFERENCES

Bandler,R.&Grinder,J.(1975).Thestructureofmagic,Vol.I.PaloAlto,CA:Science
andBehaviorBooks.

Blatner,A.(1985).Becomingawareofnonverbalcommunication.InA.Blatner,Role
development:Asystematicapproachtobuildingbasicskills.SanMarcos,TX:Author.
(Nowoutofprint.)

Blatner,A.(1996).ActingIn:Practicalaspectsofpsychodramaticmethods(3rded.).
NewYork:Springer.

Blatner,A.(2000).Foundationsofpsychodrama.NewYork:Springer.(pp.101103,
on"expressionandaction")

Fast,J.(1971).Bodylanguage.NewYork:PocketBooks.

Fine,L.J.(1959).Nonverbalaspectsofpsychodrama.InJ.Masserman&J.L.Moreno
(Eds.),Progressinpsychotherapy(Vol.4).NewYork:Grune&Stratton.

HicksonIII,MarkL.&Stacks,DonW.(1985).Nonverbalcommunication:Studiesand
applications.Dubuque,IA:Wm.C.Brown.

Marrone,R.(1990).Bodyofknowledge:Anintroductiontobody/mindpsychology.
Albany:StateUniversityofNewYorkPress.

Morris,D.(1977).Manwatching:Afieldguidetohumanbehavior.NewYork:HarryN.
Abrams.

Morris,D.,Collett,P.,Marsh,P.,&O'Shaughnessy,M.(1979).Gestures:Theirorigins
anddistribution.NewYork:Stein&Kay.

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Forresponses,emailme.

Returntotop

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