Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at

http://download.archiveofourown.org/works/704976.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: M/M
Fandom: One Direction (Band)
Relationship: Zayn Malik/Liam Payne, Niall Horan/Harry Styles
Character: Liam Payne, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan, Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson
Stats: Published: 2013-03-02 Words: 24274

Ridiculous
by scottmcniceass

Summary

They are every cliched high school story. The jock and the rebel. The popular boy and the
outsider. They shouldn't fit, and they definitely shouldn't work, but they sort of do
anyways.

Notes

I was just thinking to myself that I wanted some really cliched high school AU and then
this happened. So yeah. Enjoy. Or not. :)

There was a time when they were friends. Before the gap in the gate between their yards was
fixed, and theyd spend every afternoon together in each others backyards. When their mothers
would sip coffee by the door and chat about their lives while laughing at their two boys with dirt
stained jeans and smudges on their faces. When theyd wake up on the weekend and whoever was
up first would run to the others house and pull open the back door because their parents were so
used to them that they stopped caring a long time ago.

People grow up, though. They change. And when youre younger there are less things to separate
you. When youre younger, what clothes you wear or music you listen to or people you hang out
with does not make or break a friendship. Its as you get older, and you start looking for ways to
distinguish yourself from everyone else that these things happen. And old friendships fall apart,
because the boy with the skinny jeans and the tattoos and the cigarette dangling from his
fingertips does not hang out with the boy who wears his rugby uniform to school every day, who
sits at the most crowded table in the cafeteria. Thats just not how the world works.
Are you kidding me? Liam moans, rolling over. He knows he shouldnt sleep with his window
open, but its still late in the September and its too hot to sleep with it closed.

Through the open window he can hear Kurt Cobain wailing about -- something. He doesnt know
what, because he doesnt listen to Nirvana. Its too depressing and rough for him.

Liam gets out of bed, looking at the alarm clock on his side table. Its only seven. Why the fuck is
he even up right now?

What else could I write? I dont have the right. What else should I be? All apologies! He can
hear Zayn singing along with the music, somehow overpowering it despite the fact that the music
is deafening.

Right. Thats why hes up.

Liam takes a deep, calming breath, lest he pick up his track and field trophy from last year and
throw it at Zayns widow. He moves towards his own and pulls open the curtains and leans out,
looking down to spot his screen on the ground where its been for the last three months after
Louis, the psycho, broke into his room somehow . Hes still not sure how Lou managed that.

Turn that down! Liam yells.

Hes not sure if he can be heard over the music. If he didnt know that Zayns parents and his own
parents had left for work already, hed wonder why no one else was complaining about this. As it
is, he is sadly the only one being woken up far too early by the annoying music.

Zayns curtains move and then the other boy leans his elbows on the sill and cocks his head to the
side, waving by his ear and mouthing, Sorry, cant hear you.

I said turn it down, Zayn! Liam screams. He figures the whole neighbourhood can hear him.
Then again, they can probably hear Zayns music, too, so he doesnt really care.

Zayn steps back from the window and belts along with the music, Choking on the ashes of her
enemy. In the sun; in the sun I feel as one. In the sun, in the sun ! And, because Zayn is a
ridiculous and incredibly annoying person, he closes his eyes and pretends to play the drums along
with it.

Liam stares at him, a severely not amused look on his face as Zayn moves around his room
wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and a tank top, the tattoos covering his body clearly visible.
Finally he gives up and turns around, searching around his room. He finds Louis football in the
corner, picks it up, and moves back to the window.

Liam is not the best athlete in their school for nothing, and the ball soars through Zayns open
window and hits him right in the back of the head. Zayn stumbles and then turns to him, eyes
wide. A moment later the music turns off and the ball bounces off Liams window to fall into the
bushes below.

What the fuck ? Zayn demands.

Liam smiles sweetly at him. Can you hear me now?

Zayn flips him off and tugs his curtains closed, but he leaves the window open. Liam moves
towards his own stereo and turns it on. He doesnt have a CD in, but he has on their towns
popular radio station, and Maroon 5s Payphone plays loudly through the speakers. He turns it up
even more, until hes sure Zayn can hear it. A beat later a pair of rolled up socks flies through the
window. Liam smirks to himself and grabs his towel before heading towards the bathroom,
leaving his music loud enough to irritate his neighbour.

When he gets back to his room, towel tied around his waist, he remembers that he left his curtains
open. Zayn is sitting on his window ledge -- something that has always bothered Liam, because as
much as Zayn annoys him, Liam would be mildly upset it he plummeted to his death--, legs
dangling, smoking a cigarette.

Liam turns down his music before going to close the curtains so he can get dressed when Zayn
calls, Giving me a show, Liam? He brings his cigarette to his lips, which are curled up into a
smirk.

Liam flushes and shuts his curtains so hard he nearly rips them off the rod. Fucking Zayn Malik
and his stupid smirk and his stupid tattoos and his stupid music.

Liam gets dressed in a pair of jeans and his blue and white rugby shirt, because theyre having
tryouts today and he likes to show his team pride just like everyone else. Plus, Liams spot on the
team is secured without a doubt. Unless he manages to break his arms or legs, hell be on the team
again this year.

When hes dressed he heads downstairs and gets himself a glass of orange juice and puts two
slices of bread in the toaster. He finds a note on the counter from his mum, as well as money for
lunch. He pockets it and ignores the note, knowing that it says nothing more than have a good day
at school, sweetie! or something along those lines.

He butters his toast and eats it like that, because thats how he likes it. When hes done he follows
it up with another glass of orange juice and then runs up the stairs to brush his teeth because he
forgot to do it after his shower, and he also sprays a bit of body spray on himself. When hes done
that he has just enough time to grab his bag from the closet and his keys from the table by the
door.

He leaves the house at about the same time Zayn comes out of his own, helmet tucked under his
arm. Zayn salutes him on his way to his motorcycle. Liam hates that motorcycle. For one, its
dangerous. For another, its annoyingly loud, and Zayn has a habit of coming in late on
weeknights and waking the entire neighbourhood with the loud rumble of the engine. Why his
parents let him have it, Liam has no idea.

Liam, on the other hand, has a very respectable car. Its not exactly nice, but he paid for it by
himself with the money he saved up last summer working at the sports shop downtown. Its red
and a bit rusted, but it drives well, and it was cheap.

By the time Liams car starts -- sometimes it takes a few turns of the key in the ignition to get it to
work--, Zayn is peeling out of his driveway. Liam watches him go with a roll of his eyes. Zayn is
such a clich, with his tattoos and leather jacket and motorcycle. Honestly.

Liam stops to get coffee on the way to school, grabbing a cup of tea as well, because Louis will
pay him back for it, and he tends to be horrible in the morning when he doesnt have coffee. For
some reason he can never get it for himself; Liam really doesnt understand his friends.

Liam pulls into his parking space in the lot, the one closest to the building. Its a coveted spot, but
everyone knows that its Liams, and no one ever attempts to park there because of that fact. A
few spots down he can see Zayns bike, as well as Zayn leaning against it, arms crossed over his
chest, chatting with Harry and Perrie.

Liam! someone shouts when he exits his car.

Liam rolls his eyes at Louis as he runs towards him, nearly tripping because Louis is terribly
uncoordinated when hes not on the field. It doesnt make any sense to Liam, because if you put a
football in front of him suddenly hes graceful and athletic, but Liam has also watched Louis fall
down a set of stairs on more than one occasion.

Caffeine, Louis moans, reaching for his cup. He pulls open the tab on the lid and takes a deep
sip, despite the fact that its burning hot, which Liam knows because his own tongue still hurts
from his first sip. Bless your everything.

Youre ridiculous, Liam tells him while locking his car doors, just in case. Last year before their
big game the guys from the other team had filled his car with fish. It took a month to get the smell
out, but then again, Louis had snuck into their locker room and cut holes into all of their uniforms,
so they get them back for that, at least. And wheres Niall?

Louis shrugs as they walk towards the building. Last time I saw him he was sleeping against his
locker with a bagel on his face.

Liam frowns at him. A bagel on his face.

Louis grins. Okay, so it was in his hands but I may have removed it from said hands and stuck it
to his cheek using the cream cheese. Whatever. He shouldnt be sleeping in the hallways. Its his
own fault for leaving himself so vulnerable to attack.

Louis wasnt kidding. When he gets to their lockers -- Nialls to the left of his, Louis to the right--
, Niall is on the floor, head tilted back, mouth open, fast asleep. And there is half a bagel stuck to
his cheek. The other half must have fallen off, because it lays on the floor beside him, but has left
a smear of cream cheese on his face.

Youre an idiot, Liam tells Louis. He kicks Niall gently with his foot. Niall.

Niall gasps awake and wipes at his cheek. The bagel falls and he kicks out at Louis, who jumps
back at the last second to avoid it. Are you kidding me? he demands. I was eating that!

You were sleeping, Louis corrects. And how do you know that I did it? It could have been
Liam.

Niall grumbles something and pushes himself up. It wasnt Liam because Liams not a
fuckbucket.

Louis tilts his head to the side, looking mildly impressed. Fuckbucket, he repeats. I like that.

Go fuck yourself, Niall tells him.

Would you like to watch my attempts?

Liam ignores them and pulls open his locker. He removes his bag from over his shoulder and
takes out his binder, as well as a pen, which he holds in his mouth as he shoves the bag into his
locker. He pulls his History textbook from his shelf and then shuts his locker again, just in time to
hear the sound of a skateboard moving through the hallway.

Liam looks up to see Harry Styles moving through the crowd, people jumping out of the way for
him as Zayn runs after him. Harrys got a book in his hand, and he keeps turning and laughing at
Zayn as he goes, until theyre past Liam and down the hall, and then turning out of sight.

Fucking hot, that one, Niall says, watching them go.

Liam freezes, eyes wide. No, hes really not.

Niall shrugs. I dont know. The green eyes do it for me.

Oh, he meant Harry . Liam shouldnt be all that surprised. Niall isnt exactly bisexual. Hes not
really anything. No one can beat Nialls ability to not give a single fuck about anything. Niall likes
what he likes, doesnt what he doesnt, and could care less about what anyone else thought about
him, or about labelling things.

I thought you had that thing with whats her face? Louis says, moving towards his own locker.

Niall shrugs. Didnt work out, he replies. He doesnt open his own locker, because Nialls
locker is never touched until lunch, when hell grab his money from his bag. Until then, his books
will stay in there unless one of their teachers forces him to fetch them. She wanted a relationship
or something. I told her I wasnt really into that whole commitment thing. I like riding solo.

Niall is quite possibly a douchebag. A loyal, wonderful douchebag, but a douchebag nonetheless.
Liam loves him anyways. At least hes not clinically insane like Louis.

The bell rings and they head for their class. History is the only period they all have together.
Liams pretty sure that this was done specifically to keep them all separated, and probably for
good reason.

They take their seat at the back of the class, Mark and Patrick sitting in front of them already.
Theyre on the rugby team with Liam and Niall. Not nearly as good as they are, but not bad.

The second they sit down, Niall places his face on the table and then falls asleep. Depending on
their teachers mood, hell get away with it. Niall gets away with practically everything because,
despite the fact that he never pays attention, hes a fairly good student. If he wanted to, Liam
thinks that he could be at the top of all of their classes. But Niall does the bare minimum to get by,
and cant be bothered to do anything more.

History passes in a blur of Nialls snoring and Louis humming under his breath and balling up
pieces of paper to throw at various people around the room when their teacher isnt looking. When
the bell rings, Niall startles and nearly topples out of his seat, but Liam grabs the back of his shirt
to keep him up.

Louis heads off for his theatre class, and Liam stops at his locker to change his History book for
his English one. He has English with Niall, thankfully, because he doubts hed get through that
class without him.

Once again they sit at the back. This time Niall makes a valiant effort to stay awake. He taps his
pen against his desk in a way that would make Liams teeth grind if he wasnt so used to it.

Liam flips open his binder and scribbles on the margin as Harry comes into the room. Niall sits up
straighter and says, Styles!

Harry looks over at him, eyebrows drawing together. He sinks into a seat closer to the front of the
room and gives Niall one last confused and disbelieving look before he pulls out his book.

Liam snorts. I dont think Ive ever seen you strike out so quickly, he tells Niall.
Nialls grinning, though. He shrugs and says, Havent struck out yet. Im just starting.

The seat next to Harry stays unoccupied as the room fills up. Its Zayns seat, but Zayn wont be
there for another -- Liam checks the clock-- eleven minutes. Hes not sure if Zayn keeps a set
schedule, or if its just by accident that he turns up to every class exactly fifteen minutes late. Their
teachers barely even bat an eyelash at this anymore, because theyve tried everything and Zayn
resolutely shows up late to literally every one of his classes that Liam has had with him for the last
couple years.

Just as expected, their teacher starts writing on the board and Zayn is still not in class. Liam spots
the stack of books on her desk and sighs, wondering what hell have to read this time.

Were going to be starting with--, his teacher starts, and then stops when the door opens and
Zayn walks in. Hes grinning sheepishly, and his cheeks are flushed, like hed run all the way to
class. Mr. Malik. Late again.

Sorry about that, Zayn says, not looking sorry at all. He moves towards his seat next to Harry
and falls into it without a care in the world, like hes not aware of the fact that he just interrupted
the whole class.

As I was saying before Mr. Malik rudely interrupted, Mrs. Morin says with a pointed glare at
Zayn, were going to be starting Hamlet today. She writes Hamlet on the board in large, bold
letters. Is anyone familiar with it?

Zayn leans back in his seat, arms crossed over his chest. His chair makes a noise of protestation as
he tips back so the front legs lift off the ground. For in this sleep of death what dreams may
come, he says loudly.

Mrs. Morin smiles brightly at him, and this is exactly why Zayn never gets in trouble. Its honestly
not fair. Exactly , she says loudly. So you are familiar with it, then.

Zayn shrugs. A bit, yeah.

Liam drones out the next ten minutes of class because its basically just Zayn quoting chunks of
text and Mrs. Morin falling all over herself, and the rest of the females in the glass swooning. This
is another one of those things that would annoy him if he werent so used to it by now.

I need you to do me a favour, Niall hisses, grabbing his arm.

Liam stops scratching his pen against his paper and frowns at Niall, because those words never
lead to good things. What? he asks warily.

Malik still lives next door to you, right? he asks. Liam gives him a pointed look because Niall
knows damn well that Zayn still lives next door. Brilliant. I need you to talk to him. Figure out
what Harry likes.

Liam gapes at him. You do realize that the only words Ive spoken to Zayn in about four years
have been either, Shut up turn that down stop changing with your window open or can you
maybe not go for motorcycle rides at two am?

Nialls eyes widen and his lips form a pout. Liam groans because Niall is spectacular at the puppy
dog look and stronger men have been known to crumble beneath the power of it. What do you
even mean by figure out what Harry likes anyways?

Niall shrugs. Like-- if hes straight or whatever. And what he does after school.
Liam makes a face at him. Why cant you just stalk his Facebook page like a normal person?

Tried that, hes got it all blocked unless youre on his friends list, and Im not.

He probably should have seen that coming, to be honest. It wont work, Liam tells him. Zayn
wont tell me anything.

Nialls pout deepens. Cant you just try ?

If it was anyone but Niall, Liam thinks. Fine.

Nialls grin is so wide it looks almost painful. Youre great, you know that?

Whatever, Liam says. Pay attention. Id actually like to pass this class.

--

Rugby tryouts are tiring but fun. Same as the last two years that hes been on the team, coach first
has them run around the field twice. Anyone who cant make it is immediately cut. Then he splits
them up into groups, has them play a few runs. Niall is on the opposite team during one of these
games, and he knocks into Liams shoulder hard enough that Liam will most likely have a bruise,
but he doesnt care. Hes too caught up in the thrill of playing again to mind.

At one point the sound of a motorcycle starting up has him turning towards the fence. He watches
Zayn drive by, face masked by the helmet. Niall tackles him to the ground and Liam tunes back
into the game after that.

Dont forget what we talked about in English, Niall says afterwards, when theyre in the locker
room.

I havent, Liam assures him. Hes not looking forward to it, but he figures that it wont be
that horrible. Hell just quickly ask Zayn if Harry is into guys, and possibly into Niall, and then
hell call Niall and tell him what he said, and that will be that.

Liam drives Niall home, and then heads back to his own. Hes got homework to do, and he wants
to read through Hamlet so hell have a better understanding of it when they read through it as a
class, but he knows that hell probably not actually do it. He always gets distracted by something
and finds flimsy excuses not to do his work.

Liam parks his car, spots Zayns motorcycle in his lot, and then sighs and heads over there instead
of home. Best to get this out of the way now, or hell find a reason not to, just like with his
homework. Liam is fairly good at avoiding things he doesnt want to do.

He knocks on Zayns door and then chews his lip as he waits. He hears someone moving around
inside, and a moment later the front door opens. Zayn frowns at him for a moment before smirking
and leaning against the doorframe.

Liam, he says, stretching out the vowels. For what do I owe this pleasure?

Liam narrows his eyes and notes that Zayn is only in his boxers and the t-shirt he was wearing to
school today. Do you ever wear pants? he asks, not at all admiring the curve of Zayns thighs,
or the fact that his boxers are white and they contrast nicely with his darker skin tone.
Not when Im home, Zayn answers. If I cant walk around half naked even in my own home
without someone judging me, then I dont think I want to live on this planet anymore.

Liam gives him a flat look and only barely refrains from rolling his eyes. Anyways, I came to ask
you about Harry.

Zayns expression changes drastically. His eyes widen and his eyebrows raise, and his jaw
clenches. Harry, he repeats.

Yes, Liam says. I was just wondering, for Niall--,

Zayn cuts him off with a laugh. Please tell me Harry isnt Horans flavour of the week.

Liam glares at him. Thats my best mate youre talking about.

Zayn shrugs, not caring. Hes wasting his time, Zayn tells Liam. Harry has a strict no jock
rule.

But he is into guys, then, Liam confirms.

Zayn nods. Harrys open minded. Doesnt mean Niall has a chance.

Thats all I needed to know, Liam says, backing down the steps. Thanks.

Wait, Zayn says, stepping outside. Liams about to remind him of the fact that hes half
unclothed when he says, If hes really interested, I can help.

Liam stops walking and eyes Zayn distrustfully. Why would you do that?

Zayn shrugs once again. He runs a hand through his hair. He does that a lot, and Liams always
wondered how he manages to keep the quiff in place when he does that. He assumes the answer is
an entire bottle of hairspray. Because Nialls a hell of a lot better than half of the idiots Harry
usually goes after, Zayn explains. And hes not so bad. Bit of a douche, but a good guy.

Again, thats my best friend, Liam points out, despite the fact that hed had the same thought
earlier in the day.

Friday were having a party, Zayn tells him, ignoring Liams previous comment. Bring Niall,
and Tomlinson too, if you want. Harryll be there.

Where? Liam asks.

Zayn grins. Ill have to show you. If I give you directions youll get lost.

That sounds promising, Liam says dryly. He knows that Niall and Louis will be thrilled, but
Liams not exactly happy about the prospect of going to one of Zayns parties. They dont run in
the same crowds, and he has a feeling that Zayns idea of a party is not getting wasted at Nialls
house while listening to the top forty and drinking cheep beer out of plastic cups.

You popular kids dont know how to properly have a party, Zayn says, confirming his
suspicions. Itll be brilliant. Trust me.

I really dont, Liam says. But-- Ill talk to Niall.

You do that, Zayn replies. He backs into his house and shuts the door closed between them
without so much as a goodbye. Liam isnt really surprised or fazed by this, though, so he just
crosses over the lawn and heads into his own house.

His mum is already home, but his dad is still out. She greets him with a short, How was school?
and doesnt give him a chance to answer before she presses the phone against her ear again,
jumping right back into conversation with whoever is on the other end.

Liam heads up to his room. He goes straight for the window and opens the curtain, letting in the
light and the cool breeze from outside. Zayns window is open too, but hes not inside.

When they were younger they used to stay up all night whispering to each other through their
windows. Living next door to each other, with their bedrooms facing each other, used to be great.
Now its mostly a cause for annoyance.

Honestly, Liam cant remember why he and Zayn stopped being friends. He cant remember what
caused the fallout. Or maybe he can, because the summer when they were thirteen Liam left for
three weeks to go to camp, and when he came back Zayn started smoking and hanging out with
Harry, and then after that things were just different . Liam started playing sports and hanging out
with Niall, who introduced him to Louis. And it was like this immediate thing. It wasnt like they
slowly stopped being friends with each other. It happened all at once, and Liam had been fairly
upset about it.

Now, Liam really doesnt care. He has better friends. Ones that arent going to just drop him for
no reason. Plus, he and Zayn are far too different now anyways. Their friendship would have
ended no matter what.

A moment later Zayns bedroom door opens, and he and Harry stumble inside, laughing about
something. Zayn spots him and comes over to the window and shuts his curtains. Liam snorts and
turns on his music so he can get some work done.

Fifteen minutes later and all hes done is memorize the chorus to a Rihanna song that he really
doesnt care for. He gets distracted by the smell. Its wafting in through the window, and he
wrinkles his nose, trying to figure out what it is because its something he recognizes.

Liam gets up and moves towards his window. He finds Harry and Zayn hanging out his, passing a
joint between each other.

Honestly? Liam asks. I can smell that from here.

Zayn grins at him and holds out his hand, as if offering the joint to Liam, despite the fact that
theres no possible way Liam could reach it from this far away. Want some?

The only thing I want is for you to close your window, Liam snaps.

Harry chuckles and says, Liams always so fun, isnt he?

Liam shuts his window on their combined laughter.

He tries to get back to work after that and cant. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and calls
Niall, who answers after two rings with a loud, Did you talk to him?

Yes, Liam answers, moving around his room. He picks up the socks Zayn threw at him this
morning and tosses them into the hamper. Apparently Harry could be interested, but he also
doesnt date jocks.

Im not a jock, Niall says instantly. What else did he say?

Liam sighs and sinks onto his bed. He invited us to a party.

A party, Niall repeats. Brilliant. When?

Friday.

And Harry will be there?

Apparently.

See? Niall says, and Liam can hear his grin in his voice. I knew that you living next door to
Malik would pay off one day.

For you, maybe, Liam says, narrowing his eyes at his window.

Cant be that bad, Niall argues.

Liam thinks back to the past couple years. Yeah, it can actually.

Oh, shit, Niall says on the other end of the phone, Ive got to go. See you tomorrow in class!
Youre the best!

Liam sighs and ends the call. He looks around the room, trying to find something to do. He could
call Louis, he reasons. They could go out and do something. He just doesnt feel up to it.

In the end he heads downstairs and watches TV until his dad comes home.

--

Liam manages to sleep in the next morning because Zayn decides to not be an asshole and wake
him up with his loud music. Instead he wakes up to his alarm, which is almost as annoying. He
reaches over and hits it with his eyes closed, but instead of turning it off he manages to knock it to
the floor.

Liam groans and rolls over, the insistent beeping making his head pound. Somehow he manages
to locate the alarm, turn it off, and place it back on his bedside table with his eyes still closed. He
sits up slowly and blinks them open, wondering why it feels so stuffy and warm in his room.

Oh, right, the window. He yawns and stands up, stretching as he goes, and pulls open the curtain
before opening the window. Just as he does, he spots Zayn in his room. And of course hes naked,
because Zayn has an aversion to clothes, apparently.

Liam cant help but take in the tattoo at the back of his neck, or the expanse of exposed skin. Zayn
bends down to pick something up, and his eyes drop to Zayns ass. He bites his lip just as Zayn
turns, and he drops instantly. His elbow hits the ground painfully, and he lays there for a moment
on his back, on his fucking floor, willing his boner to go away. It doesnt.

Liam! his mother shouts.

Fuck, Liam breathes. He forgot that she works later on Wednesdays.

Time to get up! she yells.

Liam slowly pulls himself up off the ground to find Zayn leaning out his window again. Of course
that smirk is in place, and Liam knows that Zayn is aware of the fact that Liam had seen him
earlier.

Morning, neighbour, Zayn calls happily.

You should really learn how to use your curtains, Liam tells him, trying to sound cool and
unaffected. He prays that his cheeks arent red, but he figures that they are.

Where would be the fun in that? Zayn asks.

Liam closes his own curtains to get that stupid face out of his mind. And Niall wonders why Liam
is always one step away from throwing something at Zayn.

Liam heads for the shower, shutting his door loudly so his mum knows that hes awake. He kicks
off his boxers, too aware of the fact that hes still hard, and gets into the shower. He reaches a
hand down and wraps his fingers around his erection, eyes falling closed. He braces his other
hand on the wall and pumps a water slicked hand over himself, trying not to picture Zayn on his
knees in front of him, lips tilted up in a smirk before he wraps them around Liams tip. He bites
down on his lip when his orgasm washes over him, and then he finishes up his shower and towels
off.

His mum made breakfast, which is egg whites and whole wheat toast because shes been on a
health kick lately. Liam doesnt mind the healthy food, but he knows that hell have something
greasy and terribly bad for him at lunch, which makes it that much more bearable.

Hes running a bit late. Thats what happens when you get distracted by annoying but attractive
neighbours and sit down to eat and actual breakfast before school. When he gets outside, Zayn is
just getting on his bike.

Youre going to be late, Zayn tells him.

So are you, Liam points out.

Zayn laughs. Yeah, but Im trying to be late.

He gets on his motorcycle after that. Liam realizes a few beats later that hes actually going to be
even later if he just stands here and stares after him, so he gets into his car and decides to say
screw it to the morning coffee. Louis is just going to have to deal with not having his tea for one
today.

Somehow he manages to get to school a few minutes before the bell. He jogs inside, not sparing
Zayn, whos leaning against his bike again-- this time smoking on school property, because hes
an idiot--, a single glance.

Louis is waiting for him at his locker. His face lights up when he spots Liam, and then it falls
when he searches Liams arms and sees that he doesnt have his drink. Oh, god, Louis sighs
dramatically. Im going to end up decapitating someone before lunch.

Sorry, Liam says in a rush, reaching for the lock on his locker. He turns the dial and then tugs it
down. I was running late.

Youre never too late to get caffeinated beverages, Louis says seriously. Fuck this. Im
skipping first period. Niall, want anything from the coffee shop?

How about a bagel to make up for yesterday? Niall asks, standing up. Once again he had been
sitting in front of his locker.

Got it, Louis says. Ill bring you your coffee too, Liam. I forgive you for this. Just dont let it
happen again.

Liam rolls his eyes and tugs his History book out of his locker. A moment later the bell rings, and
he and Niall file into class.

Louis shows up to class half an hour late with coffee and a bagel. Their teacher glares at him, but
he shrugs uncaringly and slides into the seat next to Liam, who is trying to work. He looks up
only long enough to grab his coffee and give Louis one short, grateful glance.

So, Niall says, keeping his voice low so their teacher wont hear. Were invited to a party on
Friday.

Louis sits up straighter and raises his eyebrows. By who? Whos throwing a party that I dont
know about? Louis demands to know.

Zayn invited us, Niall explains.

Louis look of confusion grows and then he says, Wait, Malik ? Liams neighbour? The one with
the-- the motorcycle and the tattoos and the ridiculously clichd leather jacket?

That would be the one, Liam says dryly. I think its a bad idea.

I agree, Louis says instantly. They dont come to our parties, we dont go to theirs. Thats just
how it works.

Niall makes an annoyed sound. Dont pull that stuck up shit on me, Lou. Were going.

Why do you even want to go? Louis asks, like he cant think of a single good reason. Honestly,
Louis is not a snob. Or hes not most of the time. He can be a bit stuck up occasionally, though.

Harry Styles, Niall and Liam both answer at the same time.

Louis gapes at Niall and shakes his head. Please tell me youre not serious.

Okay, if you want me to lie to you, Niall replies.

Louis groans and several people look over at them. Liam pretends to be extremely interested in his
textbook. Its just--, Louis looks to Liam for help. Come on, tell him how bad of an idea this
is.

Catastrophically, Liam says.

See? Louis waves at Liam. Voice of reason. Arent you always saying, Louis, we should
really listen to Liam. Louis, Liam said that breaking into that building is a bad idea, we should
listen to him? Louis does a very bad impression of Nialls accent. What makes this suddenly
different?

Because, Niall snaps. I want to go. You dont have to come. Stay at home on Friday. Do
whatever you want, Louis, but were going.

Liam doesnt remember agreeing to this, but hes not going to argue it. Theres no point. Niall
doesnt ever really make effort with anything, but on the off chance that he does make up his mind
about something, there is no changing it. If Liam doesnt go with him, Niall will surely find a way
to go anyways.

Oh, no, Im coming, Louis says forcefully. Theres no way Im going to miss you making an
ass of yourself at some hipster party.

Niall leans back in his seat and crosses his arms behind his head. A partys a party, Lou.

Louis makes a noncommittal sound and sips his drink.

Just like yesterday, when Harry walks into English class Niall calls his name and grins at him in
greeting. Harry looks genuinely shocked and almost a bit hostile as he falls into his normal seat
and pulls his phone out. He texts something, shoots Niall another look, and then furiously writes
something else.

When Zayn walks into class, Liam drops his eyes to his textbook. Moments later a piece of paper
lands on his book and he looks to Niall, whos fallen asleep, and then frowns around the room,
trying to figure out who threw a piece of bunched up paper at him. His eyes land on Zayn, who is
smirking at the front of the room and jiggling his leg under his desk.

Liam unfolds the paper as Niall mutters something that sounds a lot like, Zac Efron.

Did you like what you saw this morning?

Liam feels heat rise to his cheeks and he folds the note back up and shoves it in his pocket. Liam
is not a blushing virgin, for fuck sake. He should not be getting this worked up over seeing Zayn
naked. Its not that big of a deal, really its not. Except yeah, he sort of did like what he had seen.

Liam grabs Nialls pencil and throws it at Zayns head. It misses and hits his shoulder instead, but
Liam is still satisfied.

At lunch Liam grabs a sandwich and a plate of chips and then heads to his table. Louis is already
sitting there, deep in conversation with Jordan. Their table is mostly full, save for his and Nialls
seats. As he heads towards it he passes Zayn and Harry, who are sitting with a few of their
friends. Harry is saying something and Zayn is cackling. Apparently it wasnt supposed to be
funny, because Harry glares at him and slaps his arm, which just makes Zayn laugh harder.

Liam resists the urge to dump his tray of food on Zayns head, if only because hes too hungry to
waste it.

He drops his tray on the table beside Louis and sinks into his seat, instantly reaching for his food.
Louis barely looks up at him before returning to his conversation, which Liam is not paying
attention to because hes far too used to Louis and Jordans conversations to even want to know
whats happening there.

Hes almost finished his chips when Niall sits down. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes are
bright. His chest is heaving with each breath, and his hair is plastered to his forehead with sweat.
Liam frowns at him, eyebrows drawing together.

Where were you? he asks, pointing a chip at Niall.

Niall shakes his head. No, not telling you.

If we dont tell you, then you cant get all disappointed father on us, Louis adds.

Liams confusion turns to concern and panic. What did you do? he demands.
Louis and Niall both shake their heads mutely. They might bicker like siblings, but they were also
a terrible combination when they decided to put their heads together. Liam doesnt even want to
think of all the shit theyve pulled over the years.

Then again, if they did something really bad, Liam would surely hear about it. He goes back to
eating, pushing his worry away, until the loudspeaker over the door to the cafeteria makes a loud
booming noise. Everyone looks up at it as their principal clears his throat.

Oh, God, Liam moans, because he has a feeling this isnt going to be good.

Anyone who has an information on the whereabouts of the science rooms ball python are urged
to come forth, their principal says, and Liam bristles. Until then, I am told to inform anyone who
comes across it not to worry. The snake is a docile creature, and it is more afraid of you than you
are of it. You are instructed to find the nearest faculty member if this situation occurs.

Thats all he has to say for the room to erupt in panic. More than one female shriek pierces the
room. Several people struggle to sit on top of the tables so their legs arent on the ground. Liam,
on the other hand, barely reacts.

Where is it? he asks.

Lawsons supply closet, Niall says casually.

Fucker gave me detention for being late this morning, Louis adds.

Liam sighs heavily. I really dont know why I associate with either of you.

The general panic over the snake has everyone too hyped up, and his last classes of the day are
spent with his teachers attempting to calm down most of the students. Liam sits there, bored,
because unlike them this isnt cause for alarm or interest. Of course, he cant actually tell everyone
to calm the hell down, or where the snake is, because then Niall and Louis will get in trouble.

By the time school ends, Liam is in a bad mood. He cant help it. Zayns crawled under his skin
and it makes Liam irritated, and on top of that he has the Niall and Louis situation. Its just too
much. Sometimes he just wants to get in his car, turn on the radio, and drive until he runs out of
gas money and has no choice but to stop.

Louis gives Niall a ride home, so Liams alone in the car when he pulls out of his space and Zayn
cuts him off. Liam honks loudly and Zayn turns. He cant see Zayns face through the helmet, but
he has a feeling that the other boys lips are tilted up.

Zayn stays there, right in the middle of the parking lot, blocking Liams exit. Liam honks again
but Zayn makes no sign of moving any time soon. At least, not until the door to the school opens
and Harry runs down the steps. Hes got a helmet tucked under his arm, and he grins at Zayn
before pulling it on and slinging a leg over the back of the bike. A moment later they peel out of
the lot, Harry clinging to Zayns back. Liam cant help but wonder if that would be him instead of
Harry, if things had went differently.

He doesnt go home right away. Hes too annoyed, and he needs to blow off steam. Instead, he
heads to the gym closest to his house and works out for a bit. He doesnt bother with lifting
weights because he doesnt really like doing that. He spends most of his time on the treadmill, and
then skips the shower afterwards. Hell take one at home. He hates public bathrooms.

When he pulls into his parking lot, neither of his parents are home. The kitchen light is always a
telltale sign of whether or not any of them are. If its off, no one is home. The second his mum
comes home, she has a habit of turning on nearly every light in the house. The second his father
comes home he heads straight for the fridge, subsequently turning the light on as he goes.

Liam gets out of the car and climbs the two steps, legs aching. He overdid it with the treadmill,
apparently. His body is in that limp, cramped state it gets in when he pushes himself too far. He
knows his limits, and yet that doesnt mean he always minds them.

He gets to his room and tosses his bag on the bed before reaching behind himself and tugging at
the material of his shirt, pulling it over his head with one swift movement. Its sweaty and he
shivers as the cool air in the room hits his sweat coated skin.

He turns to grab his towel from where it hangs on the chair under his desk, just in time to see Zayn
gaping at him. Liam freezes and Zayns eyes very noticeably move down his body, just as Harry,
out of sight, says, What are you looking at?

Liam figures that its not just his face thats turning red. Hes probably doing one of those horrible
full body flushes, and he grabs his towel and moves towards the door, not fast enough to miss
Zayns, None of your fucking business. He also doesnt miss the slamming of Zayns window,
either, but he doesnt really think about it as he heads for the bathroom.

--

Hes trying to follow along with Mrs. Morin in English when another note lands on his desk.
Liam groans and lifts his eyes to Zayn, who is trying and failing to look completely innocent.
Harry, beside him, is frowning and darting his eyes between Zayn and Liam. He elbows Zayn in
the ribs and whispers something to him, and Zayn turns to grin at Liam before whispering
something back.

Liam flips them both off and resolutely ignores the note. Or he tries to, but he cracks two minutes
later and unfolds it, eyes scanning the words written in script that could be considered sloppy and
sharp, but is also sort of elegant in a way.

Really starting to see the benefit of our windows facing each other. You should definitely leave the
curtains open after a workout from now on.

Liam narrows his eyes and blushes at the same time. He grabs his pen and scratches out Zayns
words before adding his own.

Dont count on it , Liam writes, and then he scrunches up the paper so its a ball and he throws it
at Zayns head. Several people look up with interest, but Liam drops his eyes back to his paper.
He hears Zayn shift in his seat, and then the crinkling of the paper.

When he looks up Zayn is angling his chair so hes half facing the front of the room and half
facing Liam. Hes staring down intently down at the paper, though, eyebrows drawn together. He
has the tip of his pen in his mouth, and Liam tries not to notice the way his lips wrap around the
end and his cheeks hollow when he breathes in.

And then his tongue darts out and wraps around the edge, and then his lips sink farther down it.
Liam shifts in his seat, very aware of the fact that hes got a fucking boner in the middle of class,
all because Zayn doesnt know how to properly use a pen without turning the act into something
worthy of a pornography movie.

Liam moves his eyes up to Zayns, finding the other boy watching him. He pulls the pen from
between his lips and laughs, shaking his head. Liam tries to glare at him, but Zayn breaks eye
contact and starts writing something on the page. Liam has a feeling its not something PG rated, if
the look on Zayns face is anything to go by.

Zayn tosses the paper back to Liam, and Liam goes to grab it just as Mrs. Morin appears in front
of him and snatches it from his desk. Liam sucks in a surprised breath as she moves towards the
front of the room again while saying, Honestly, boys, note passing? Do you not own
cellphones? The class laughs. Should I read this outloud?

More than one person makes a sound of agreement. Liam shakes his head, no, but Zayn leans
back in his seat, a pleasant grin on his face. Go ahead, he urges.

Mrs. Morins eyes scan the page and then her cheeks turn an alarming shade of red. I-- you--
detention, Zayn! And you as well, Liam. The audacity to write-- I am genuinely disappointed in
the two of you.

Niall leans forward and whispers, What the fuck did it say?

Liam shakes his head, bewildered. I honestly dont know.

When the bell rings, signalling the end of class, Liam packs up his things and goes to leave,
following behind Niall, but Mrs. Morin says, Sit down, Mr. Payne.

Liam sits down. Hes never really been in trouble. He tends to be on the sidelines as Louis and
Niall get in trouble. Their teachers seem to get that Liam is as helpless to stop them as they always
are, and he rarely gets roped into punishment with them both.

Zayn is still in his seat, and he taps his pencil against his desk. He looks relaxed and cheerful, as if
he couldnt think of a better place to be right now. Liam should be heading to his locker, grabbing
his lunch money, and moving on to the cafeteria with Niall. Instead hes in a desk still while his
teachers glares at him.

That note you two were passing around in class was very inappropriate, Mrs. Morin says
slowly. Are you aware of this?

I dont even know what it said, Liam says defensively.

Mrs. Morin seems to contemplate these words for a moment. Finally she sighs and says, You
may go, Liam. Zayn, you may not.

Liam may be a little smug as he leaves the room. Just a little.

On his way to his table at lunch, Harry Styles steps into his path. Liam moves to the left, and
Harry steps sideways so that Liam is still blocked.

Yes? Liam asks, raising his eyebrows.

Harry narrows his eyes. Why are you out when hes still in there? Harry demands.

Liam shrugs. Probably because I dont even know what he wrote on that stupid paper.

Harrys eyes narrow even more, and then he suddenly grins, catching Liam off guard. I have a
pretty good guess, Harry tells him. Probably a good thing Morin intercepted that note, actually.

Liam goes to ask him what it said, but Harry is already walking away from him, heading to his
designated table. Liam sighs and moves on towards his.
What was that about? Louis hisses. Niall is too busy gazing at Harry with heart eyes.

I dont know, Liam says quietly.

--

Niall is hyped up all day on Friday. He barely sits still in class, and even manages to stay awake
through all of them. Liam pointedly ignores Zayn as best as he can, though hes wondering how
the hell Zayn is supposed to tell him where this party is if he does so. Maybe hes secretly hoping
that Zayn will take back the invitation and they wont have to go.

At least he has rugby to distract him. They dont have a long practise, because the whole purpose
of this one is mostly just to get the older players used to playing again, and to weed out the last of
the potential new players. They play a game with the veterans on one team, and the new kids on
the other. Of course Liams team completely destroys them because theyre not only more
experienced players, but theyre all used to playing with each other, and they work well together.

Still, in the end coach has apparently decided on a few new players, and the official team will be
posted on the wall just inside the front doors on Monday.

Liam tells Niall to text Louis on their way to Liams so he can come over. Whether they go to the
party or not, theyll all end up doing something together tonight anyways.

Zayns motorcycle is parked in his lot, and Niall lingers on his way into the house, like hes
expecting Zayn to come out and greet them. Not likely, Liam thinks, and he briskly moves inside
his house. He still needs to shower because, unlike Niall, Liam doesnt use the school showers.

He, Louis and Niall are so used to spending time at each others houses that Liam feels comfortable
enough to head straight upstairs, grab a clean towel from the linen closet, and get in the shower.
Niall will find his way to the fridge first, get a drink and a snack (if Liams mum doesnt make him
one first) and then hell be in Liams room by the time hes done.

Just as expected, when Liam walks into his room ten minutes later in the clothes hed worn to
school, Niall is in his room. Hes not on the bed like he usually would be, though. Hes hanging
out Liams window.

What are you doing? Liam demands.

Niall turns, a grin on his face. Talkin to your neighbour.

Liam moves towards him, and he sees Zayn in his own window, arms rested on the sill. Just
letting you know to be ready for quarter to nine.

So were still going, then, Liam says flatly.

Niall frowns at him. Of course were still going.

Liam rolls his eyes and Zayn grins at him. Liam shuts his window and pulls the curtains closed.
Is Lou coming?

Niall shakes his head and moves backwards to flop onto Liams bed. He stretches out comfortably
as Liam sinks into his computer chair. No, he told me to tell you to come pick him up when
were ready to go, Niall answers. That way therell be one less vehicle to drive, and well only
need one designated driver.

Are you sure this is a good idea? Liam hesitates to ask. He pushes away from his computer
desk, using the wheels of the chair to move around. I mean, were not going to know anyone
there. Thats not really our crowd.

Niall sits up on his elbows. Did Louis get to you?

Liam shakes his head and rubs the back of his neck. Hes not sure why hes dreading this so
much, but he definitely is. Okay, maybe he has a slight idea, and the answer to that lives directly
beside him. Zayn has been everywhere this past week, and he doesnt like it. It makes him uneasy,
because a small, stupid part of Liam misses him and longs for the time when they were close. And
then another, much larger part of him seriously dislikes the boy who his best friend had become.

Forget I said anything, Liam says abruptly. He grins. Itll be great.

Yeah it will, Niall agrees, falling back onto the bed. His snapback falls off his head but he
doesnt make any move to grab it. Maybe youll meet someone, too. bout time, really,
considering the fact that you havent been with anyone since Danielle, and that ended almost six
month ago.

Liam closes his eyes and turns in his chair so hes facing the wall. He doesnt like to think about
that, because it still sort of hurts. Its not that hed been terribly in love with Danielle. Shed been
sweet and lovely, really, and she still is. They just didnt work . Danielle always had dance class,
and Liam always had rugby, and they were too busy. The only time they really spent together was
at weekend parties, and then at least one of them had been fairly drunk. When they decided to
break up -- a mutual thing--, it was for the best.

Maybe, Liam says noncommittally, because he doesnt really plan on looking for anyone any
time soon.

Niall brought a change of clothes with him since he was planning on staying the night and he had
to bring his bag to school for rugby anyways, and at eight he heads to the bathroom to change.
Liam looks down at himself, shrugs off his t-shirt, and pulls on a cleaner one. He could care less
what he looks like because its not like hes looking to impress anyone.

Liam texts Louis to let him know that theyll be at his house by around nine, and then impatiently
waits for Niall to be ready.

Niall comes into the room in an outfit that looks literally the exact same as the one hed went into
the bathroom wearing, but he smells considerably more like cologne than he had. This good,
yeah? he asks. Liam takes in the t-shirt with the button-up undone over top of it, and the slightly
baggy jeans, all topped off with his black snapback.

You look fine, Liam assures him.

Really? Niall asks, looking down at himself. Think youd blow me? Hypothetically speaking.

Liam decides right then that hes going to ask his mum if he can start going to yoga with her. He
needs something calming in his life.

He leans forward in his chair and props his head up with his hand, using it to cover his eyes as he
breathes deeply. I-- yes, Niall, hypothetically speaking, Im sure it would be a pleasure to blow
you in that outfit.
Brilliant, Niall says, not noticing or not caring that Liams words were laced with dry sarcasm.
Lets go then.

Liam stands up and checks to make sure that his cellphone is fully charged before the go. As soon
as they get outside, Zayns door opens and he and Harry come out. Theyre talking in a hushed
whisper, and Zayns got a cigarette in his hand. He grabs Harry with his other hand and physically
drags him across the lawn towards Liam and Niall.

Just get in the fucking car, Harry, Zayn snaps.

Harry glares at him but says, Fine. Without even looking at Niall or Liam, he gets into the
backseat of Liams car. Niall follows suit a moment later.

No smoking in my car, Liam tells Zayn.

Zayn shrugs and drops his cigarette to the ground before stepping on it. He gives Liam a short grin
before getting in the passenger seat. Liam squeezes his hands into fists before getting into the
drivers seat.

Ive got to stop and pick up Louis first, Liam tells Zayn as he starts up the car. Of course,
because his life is hell, it doesnt start right away. He sighs and turns the key again, then pauses,
and does it once more before it catches.

He would question why Zayn is in the passenger seat and his actual friend is in the back, but he
knows that its so Zayn can give him directions. Then again, he could probably give directions
from the backseat, too, but Niall is most likely pleased by these seating arrangements anyways.
Too bad Liam isnt.

Whatever, Zayn says easily, rolling down his window. The leans an arm out and makes a face.
I hate cars.

I hate your motorcycle , Liam thinks. He doesnt say it. Instead he turns up the radio, because the
amount of awkwardness in the car is overwhelming. Niall seems cheery, at least.

When they pull up in front of Louis house the front door opens and Louis comes out. Liam taps
his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel. The scent of Zayns cologne is filling his senses, and
he just really, really wants to get out of the car. Or wants them to get out of his car. One or the
other, he doesnt even care at this point.

Louis pulls open Harrys door and then pauses. Great, were all going to be crammed into the
backseat, he mutters. Move over, Styles.

Harry makes an annoyed sound but obliges, scooting over until hes in the middle seat,
sandwiched between Louis and Niall. The look on his face only reinforces Liams thought that
they shouldnt be doing this. Its too weird. None of them are friendly. They dont hang out for a
reason , and that reason is that theyre all too different to get along.

Head down the main street until you get to Johnson, Zayn says, pulling Liams attention back to
driving.

Where are we even going? Louis asks.

A party, both Zayn and Harry answer.

Louis snorts. That cleared it up. Thank you. Youre both so helpful.
Liam ignores them and drives. When he gets to Johnson he turns, and then Zayn says, When you
get to Kenton, go left.

Left, Liam repeats. That goes out of town.

Exactly.

Liam turns left at Kenton, and not long afterwards the streetlights start to get fewer and far
between, until they pass the sign that greets people driving into the city, and says farewell to those
leaving. After that theres nothing but trees on the sides of the road, the only light coming from
Liams high beams, because its late enough at night that the sun has set and the moon and the
stars are high in the sky.

Turn right up here, Zayn commands.

Liams gripping the steering wheel very tightly, and everyone in the car is mostly quiet except for
Louis occasionally annoyed huff of breath. Seriously, where are we going?

Zayn doesnt answer, but for some reason Liam still listens to him, turning down a road that he
only manages to see because of the mailbox with the reflector at the end of it. The terrain suddenly
changes, and theyre on a bumpy dirt road.

Liam hates back roads. For one, his car isnt really equipped for them. For another, the trees seem
to swoop down and bend over the car, almost caging them in. It makes him more than a little
uncomfortable.

Slow down a bit, Zayn tells him. We might miss the turn off.

What turn off? Liam asks. He cant see anything anywhere but trees.

That turn off, Zayn says with a sigh, leaning out his window a bit. You cant turn around, the
roads too narrow. Youre gonna have to reverse.

Liam makes a frustrated sound and hits the gas a bit too hard. Harry nearly flies forward, but Niall
puts an arm across his chest to stop him. Liam stops for a moment and collects himself before
putting the car in reverse. This time he sees the turn off, and he backs past it and then turns onto it.

This road is even worse than the last one. Every pothole seems to jostle the car, and Liam nearly
bites his tongue off. Suddenly the smell of burnt wood fills the car, and in the distance Liam can
see smoke rising in the air.

Where are we? Louis demands.

Just keep going until youre in the field, Zayn says, not answering Louis question.

Theyre on a farm, Liam realizes when he gets to the field. There is at least fifteen cars parked
around the barn, most of them with their lights on to illuminate it. In the distance theres a bonfire,
and music plays loudly through the vehicles that are turned on.

Theres got to be at least seventy people, Liam guesses. Shouts and singing fill the air, as well as
the scent of the fire and the smell of farm, which is rich and muddy. Theyre far enough out of
town that the stars seem impossibly bright. Liams feeling of unease grows even stronger.

No one get out of the car yet, Zayn says as he undoes his seatbelt. You got a pen and paper?
he asks Liam.
Check the dashboard, Liam tell him.

Zayn pulls open the compartment in front of him and produces a pen and paper. He quickly writes
something on it and then rips the paper into pieces before shoving the pen and paper back in the
compartment, closing it with a click.

Horan, give me your hat for a moment. He doesnt ask, he just holds out his hand.

Niall hands over his hat and Zayn drops the papers into it, and then holds the hat out to Liam.
Take a paper and read it.

Liam frowns but does at hes told. His fingers find a small slip of paper, and he pulls it out of the
hat and reads it. It just says Zayn.

Zayn groans loudly and Harry laughs. Give me your keys, Liam.

The others are filing out of the car except for Niall, whos holding out his hand for his hat. Zayn
dumps the slips of paper onto Liams floor without a care and then hands it over. Niall pulls the
hat onto his head and then exits the car.

Why do you want my keys? Liam asks, shutting off the car. He pulls the keys out of the ignition
and holds them tightly in his hand.

Because Im designated driver, Zayn answers. Unless youd rather stay sober the whole night,
by all means go ahead. Id rather get wasted anyways.

Youre not driving my car, Liam tells him.

Zayn shrugs. Fine by me, he says, pushing open his door. Have fun, Liam. Dont drink
anything that doesnt come out of a new can, and if Markus invites you inside the barn say no
unless youd like to have his tongue in your mouth.

Wait, Zayn--, but Liams words are lost as Zayn shuts the car door between them and heads off
into the crowd of people between the barn and the cars. Liam watches him go and groans.

This is not his scene at all. He doesnt see anyone he recognizes, and he doesnt feel comfortable
knowing that so many people are getting drunk outside. It would be really easy for someone to
stumble off into the woods and get lost, and Liam would feel responsible somehow, just because
he was here at the time.

His friends have already wandered off somewhere, though. He cant see Louis or Niall in the
crowd, which is a bit surprising. He figured Louis would linger back, stay more on the sidelines,
or even pitch a fit in the car until Liam drove him home. But then again, this is Louis. He may be
stuck up and prickly, but he loves to party, and he can make friends anywhere. Even with people
hed rather not associate with.

Liam sighs and gets out of the car. Its a bit chilly and he regrets not wearing a sweater. Zayns
probably nice and warm in his ridiculous leather jacket, which just makes him resent Zayn even
more. If he had told Liam that this party was way out in the middle of nowhere, Liam would have
point blank refused to come, Nialls mission to get in Harrys pants be damned.

The ground is a bit wet and his feet sink into it a little. His car is parked the farthest from the
building, and he heads towards the others, following the same path Zayn had just made. He
pockets his keys and hesitantly makes his way into the crowd.

Its so obvious that he doesnt fit in here. More than a few people eye him as he looks around for
his friends, and someone shouts, Hey, Malik, you trying out for the team this year or do you just
have a thing for pretty boys in athletic uniforms?

Liam flushes and shoulders past the guy who yelled that. The lights from the cars sort of create a
halo of light that reaches all the way to the barn. Not all of the cars are facing the barn, though,
and two different trucks are parked backwards, one of them with a large keg in the back. Thats
where he spots Niall and Louis, as well as Harry and Zayn.

Im Irish, he hears Niall say over the music that pours out of several cars. Theyve all got their
radios on the same station, he figures. No one can out drink me.

Harrys leaning against the truck, arms crossed over his chest. Hes got an orange beanie on his
head, concealing his curls, and he looks reluctantly amused, like hes trying really hard not to
smile and is failing slightly. You want to test that?

Niall shrugs. Sure.

Harry turns and reaches into the back of the truck and produces a stack of cups. Hey, you drink
you pitch in! someone shouts from behind him.

Liam stops beside Louis, who is eying the crowd. Harry pulls a few bills out of his pocket and
deposits them into one of the cups and then holds the cup out to Zayn, who pulls out money, too,
and does the same. A moment later Niall adds a few bills to the cup, and then Louis reluctantly
forks over money, too.

Liam is the only one who doesnt pitch in because hes not drinking. That is not only because hes
got to drive, but because hes too out of his element to even consider getting drunk right now.

Zayn fills a cup with what is probably warm, flat beer, and then walks away. Liam watches him
jump onto the hood of a car beside Perrie, slinging an arm over her shoulder.

This isnt so bad, Louis comments. He takes a sip of the cup that Harry passed to him a moment
ago. Not the beer. Its cheap and disgusting. Just-- I mean, its sort of cool, being this far out of
town. Why havent we ever thought of this?

Because you popular kids dont know how to party, Harry supplies, much like Zayn had said to
him the other day.

Is that bonfire safe? Liam asks abruptly, pointing to the fire in the distance. Even this far off he
can see that there are more people out there, crowded around it.

Oh, definitely, Harry says easily. This isnt the first party weve had out here, and its not the
last. And weve never burnt down the forest yet, so Id be willing to bet that its pretty safe.

Harry talks in a low, slow kind of voice that reminds Liam of smoking his first joint a few years
ago with Niall and Louis, when everything seemed to be in slow motion, soft and languid. Its sort
of nice. Objectively, Liam can see why Nialls interested. Harrys attractive and interesting to look
at, and hes just different than their normal crowd. From the glint in his green eyes to the tattoos
that peak out of the collar of his shirt, down to his skinny jeans and shoes. Different .

Thought we were having a drinking contest, Niall pipes up, giving Liam a slightly annoyed
look, like he wasnt happy that Liam had stolen Harrys attention for a moment.

Liam and I are going to go check out that fire anyways, Louis says, grabbing Liams arm.
Harry, if he gets drunk and starts singing Christmas carols just put him in the backseat of Liams
car.
Harry frowns at eyes Niall apprehensively. Niall smiles brightly at him. Okay, he says, dragging
out the o.

Louis drags Liam away, throwing a single look over his shoulder at Harry and Niall. Thats not
going to happen, Louis says breezily as they walk across the field towards the fire. It gets warmer
the closer they get, but the crowd near the fire also gets louder, so Liam isnt sure if he considers
this a good idea or a bad one.

Why not? Liam asks, frowning back at Niall and Harry, who are both chugging their cups of
beer.

Louis rolls his eyes. For one, Harrys not interested in the slightest, Louis explains. And for
another, the hard to get thing only keeps Nialls attention for so long. Hell give up soon enough
and move on to someone else. Watch.

Liam doesnt deny it because hes probably right.

Louis manages to find someone that they actually know. Heather is the kind of person who flits
between crowds, doesnt really hang out with one specific group. A floater, really. Louis gets her
to introduce them to a few of her friends, all of which eye them warily. Liam only recognizes a
handful of them from school, people hes passed in the hallways but never really talked to.

Half an hour later and Louis is on his way to being completely plastered. One of Heathers friends
had vodka, and Louis was sipping it and chasing it with his beer, which was probably really gross,
not that Liam would know from first hand experience, because hes not that stupid.

You good here? Liam asks Louis, a hand on his elbow.

m good, Louis agrees, nodding. Ill be with Heather. Shell keep me safe, wont you?

Ive got him, Liam, Heather assures him.

Shes fit, yeah? Louis whispers to him a bit too loudly.

Liam gives Heather an apologetic look, but the girl seems completely unfazed as she tugs Louis
down so they can sit on a large piece of wood thats just far enough away from the fire to be safe
but also still close enough to keep them warm.

Liam walks back towards the cars by himself. The light of the fire and the light of the vehicles
dims halfway but Liam just shoves his hands in his pockets and keeps walking. He spots Niall in
the crowd and frowns at the beanie on his head, and then his frown deepens when he spots Harry
a few feet away, talking to someone, head tilted back in a laugh, Nialls snapback on his head.
Hes wearing it backwards, and his curls are fighting to escape it.

Huh.

The music playing is too heavy and loud for his liking, so Liam turns and avoids moving through
the crowd, instead opting to walk along the outer circle of the vehicles until he gets to his own. He
pulls open his door and slides into the drivers seat and then sits there for a bit, listening to the
music struggling to get inside the car and mostly failing, somehow more bearable at a lower
decibel.

After a few moments Liam shoves the key into he ignition and turns it, eyes on the clock, which
flashes 10:47. Liam sighs and turns up the radio, the station its tuned to playing music that he
actually likes.
The passenger door opens and Zayn practically falls into the seat. His head knocks against Liams
shoulder and his hand falls onto Liams thigh before he rightens himself. Zayns hair is a mess and
he smells like perfume, not the cologne hed filled the car with earlier. His eyes are bright, too, and
he turns to Liam with a wide grin.

Whatre you doing in here? Zayn asks, raising his eyebrows. He leans against his door, legs
spread wide, and regards Liam with a look that is equal parts mischievous and warm.

I could ask you the same question, Liam points out. This is my car.

Yeah, but--, Zayn waves a hand, gesturing towards the party. Shouldnt you be having fun?

Trust me, sitting in my car is closer to my idea of fun than being out there, Liam says quietly,
frowning out the windshield. He wants Zayn out of the car, to be quite honest. He wants Zayn
back out of his life like he has been for the past couple of years, because he fits too easily into it
and thats not fair .

God, youre boring , Zayn sighs. Liam glares at him. Come on, come with me.

Hes out of the car before Liam can ask him where he wants Liam to go with him. And its only
because hes bored sitting alone in the car, and hes too confused and curious not to, that he
follows, pushing open his door and stepping back out onto the soft, damp ground.

Zayn drops back a step and his arm brushes against Liams. For one short, absurd moment, Liam
wonders if Zayn is going to hold his hand. But then it passes, and he doesnt, and Liams not
surprised. Why would he even want that in the first place? Did he even want that in the first place?
No, definitely not.

Where are we going? Liam asks as they move into the crowd of people. Bodies press against
them on all sides, as well as the pounding music and the light from the cars. Liam feels slightly
anxious and short of breath.

Zayn doesnt answer or look at him. He just keeps shouldering past people, ignoring anyone who
calls out a greeting to him (which is a lot of people, actually). Liam feels like a stupid, lost puppy
following him around, but its either that or sink back into the crowd and make his way back to his
car, and he doesnt really want to do that.

They get to the doors of the barn, which are partially opened, allowing the light from outside in.
There are quite a few people inside the barn, too, some sitting on old hay bales, others on old
plastic chairs. It smells heavily like smoke, but not cigarette smoke, and almost everyone in the
barn turns to look at them as they enter.

Come on, Zayn says, walking to the other side of the barn. He stops at a ladder and puts his
hand on one of the higher rings and his foot on one of the lower ones. He gives Liam a
challenging, expectant look.

Liam sighs and crosses the barn, too, the hay and dirt under his feet much softer than hed
expected. Zayn grins and climbs up the ladder. Liam cant see whats up there, but its not very
high off the ground. Liams height and a half, maybe.

Liam wraps his hands around the ladder and pulls himself up, ignoring the way the frayed wood
digs into his fingers. The ladder creaks under his weight and Liam sucks in a breath, but its not
that far of a fall anyways.

The ladder leads to what is sort of like a loft, covered in even more hay. Its dark up here because
the light from outside struggles to filter into the room. Zayn pulls his phone out of his pocket and
tosses it to the ground, falling down beside it a moment later.

The light from his phone only lights up a small fraction of the space. Liam moves towards it and
sinks to the ground, too, because he doesnt know what else hes supposed to do. The hay is
scratchy under his hands, and Liam sneezes, which makes Zayn laugh.

Why are we up here? Liam asks. Zayn probably cant see his disapproving and annoyed look,
but Liam hopes that his tone conveys how he feels just as sufficiently.

Because, Zayn answers, digging around his pocket, you have a no smoking in your car rule,
and I wanted to be somewhere private.

Zayn produces a slightly flattened joint from his pocket, as well as a lighter. He grins at Liam and
brings it to his lips before flicking the lighter. It sparks but doesnt catch, and he flicks it again, the
flame flickering from the wind blowing through the cracks in the wood that makes up the walls of
the barn.

Zayn cups a hand around the flame and Liam can hear the quiet, almost inaudible sound of the
paper burning as Zayn drops his hand and inhales deeply, eyes falling closed. He keeps them
closed as he pulls the joint from his lips, leaving his mouth open in an o shape. Finally he
breathes out the smoke and his eyes open again, lazily blinking at Liam.

You brought me up here so you could get high, Liam states, eyes narrowing.

Zayn shifts so that his legs are bent, feet flat against the ground, elbows resting on his knees. The
joint hangs from his fingers, a thin stream of smoke billowing up from it. Pretty much, yeah,
Zayn answers with a shrug. You have a problem with that?

Liam sighs and spreads his legs out in front of himself and leans back on his hands. If he werent
in some gross, abandoned barn, he might lay down. I dont even know why Im here , Liam
admits.

Zayn takes another hit off the joint and then says, smoke still in his mouth, voice tight, Come
here.

Liam shakes his head. Why?

Because you need to fucking relax , mate, Zayn says, shaking his head with his lips tilted up.
Honestly, Liam, youre eighteen, not eighty.

You dont even know me, Liam argues.

Something in Zayns expression goes dark, but it passes with another hit of the joint. When he
pulls it from his lips he extends it to Liam, who shakes his head.

Im driving, Liam reminds him.

Zayns eyelashes appear impossibly long in the lowlight, and the smoke clouds around him in a
way that is almost eerie. Right, he says slowly. He pushes himself up and Liam wonders if
theyre leaving, but Zayns phone is still on the ground so he assumes that Zayns coming back.

Zayn moves towards the edge of the loft and Liam goes to grab his arm and pull him back,
because Zayn has a thing with dangling from heights, like out of his window, and it freaks Liam
out a bit. But he drops to his stomach so that only his head and arms are hanging over the edge
and says, Harry, come take this from me.
He hadnt seen Harry in the room when theyd come in, but he hears the other boys response of,
Whatre you doing up there?

Have you seen Liam recently? And thats obviously Niall.

Harry, none of your fucking business, Zayn answers. And I havent seen Payne since he went
down to the bonfire with Tomlinson.

Zayn lets his one arm drop, and when he pulls back up the joint is gone from his fingers. He sits
up and comes back over to Liam, this time sitting down directly beside him, barely any space
between the two of them. The smell of the weed lingers around Zayn, and his eyelids are heavily
drooped.

Whyd you lie? Liam asks, tilting his head to the side, as if looking at Zayn from another angle
will make him less confusing.

Because if I didnt, Zayn says, slinging an arm over Liams shoulder, they would have come
up here.

Hes not sure if Zayns phone died, or if it had one of those automatic timers that put it into sleep
mode after a certain amount of time, but suddenly the light it was creating disappears, leaving
them in heavy shadows.

Liam goes to throw Zayns arm off him so he can hit the phone, use the light to guide him back to
the ladder, and get out of here. But then theres a hand on cupping his chin, tilting his head to the
side. Zayns thumb brushes against his bottom lip before he moves it and then replaces it with his
lips.

Liam sucks in a surprised breath, body tensing. His tries to grab at something, but his hands curl
uselessly around the hay beneath him. Zayns lips are gone for only a beat, and then theyre back
on his, soft, slightly slick, and Zayns hand falls from his face to his chest, applying just enough
pressure to guide Liam back, but not to force him.

He might as well have took a hit off the joint because he feels high anyways. His head is
swimming, and everything seems hyper focused, the sounds of the people in the barn below, the
music outside, the scent of the hay and Zayn, and Zayns lips.

Its like time freezes for a moment and theyre suspended like that, the gentle pressure of their lips
pressing together, their quiet breathing. A hundred questions run through Liams mind, and he
cant focus on a single one.

His back hits the ground and the kiss breaks for a moment, one moment in which everything
seems to start up again, the world coming back into focus, and Liam cant help but wonder what
the fuck is happening. And why hes letting it happen. And why he likes it.

And then Zayn is straddling his waist, legs on either side of his body, and hes dipping his head to
slot their mouths together again. Answering those questions is no longer important.

Zayns lips part and coax Liams open, too, and Liam lets them, lets Zayns tongue brush against
his, tasting of smoke and sour alcohol. His hands slide up Zayns back and tangle in his hair, soft
at the back and a bit harder at the front from whatever product he uses.

Liam cant even be embarrassed about the fact that hes hard right now because Zayn is a warm,
solid weight on top of him, and nothing else really matters. When Zayn grinds his hips down, just
a bit, Liam lets out a soft, breathless sound into his mouth, and then without warning hes
scrambling off Liam.

Liam sits up, ears buzzing, eyes struggling to focus in the lack of light. He feels weightless and
lost all of a sudden, too confused to think straight.

You werent supposed to be into it, Zayn hisses, grabbing his phone from the ground. The light
flares up, and Liam can see how red and slick Zayns lips are. You werent-- that-- fuck .

I dont understand, Liam says quietly. Im really, really confused.

You-- you ? Zayn snaps. I was just trying to fuck with you! You werent supposed to be into
it!

Liams eyebrows draw together as he tries to make sense of Zayns words, but he really cant. He
doesnt know if thats because theyre confusing, or if its because the kissing has left his head
spinning too much to decipher them.

Zayn shakes his head, and he looks as lost as Liam does. He walks towards the edge of the loft,
drops down so his legs are dangling off the edge, and then gives Liam one last look before he
pushes off the edge and falls to the ground. Liam hears the thump of him hitting the floor below.

Liam sits there for a moment, wondering if any of that really happened. It couldnt have, because
none of it makes any sense at all. Zayn kissing him doesnt make sense. Him liking it doesnt
make sense. Zayns words and then him running off doesnt make sense.

Theyre not going to make any more sense if he just sits there, though, so he pushes himself up off
the hay covered ground and takes his phone out of his pocket, using the light to find his way back
to the ladder. He pockets it and then starts climbing down.

Zayns not in the barn anymore. Neither is Niall. Liam drops his gaze to the ground as he leaves,
but he still feels everyones eyes on him anyways.

He wants to go home. Thats all he can think on his way to the car. He just wants to go home,
shower to get the grime from the barn off his skin, and the feel of Zayn against him out of his
mind, and sleep. He really, really wants to sleep.

He vows to send Louis and Niall a text when he gets to the car so that they can leave. He doesnt
have to send a text to Niall though, apparently, because he pulls open the door of his car to find
Niall and Harry in the backseat. Niall is on his back, and Harry is on top of him. Hes tall enough
that, when he straightens up to meet Liams eyes, he has to duck his head. And hes still wearing
Nialls snapback.

Hi, Harry says sheepishly.

Niall pushes himself up onto his elbows and pouts at Liam. Come back in, like, fifteen minutes.

They are both drunk, obviously. Their cheeks are too red for it to just be from the heavy make out
session, and the smell of alcohol fills the car. Liam sighs and says, Fifteen minutes and then
were leaving.

Ill text Zayn, Harry offers, looking a little guilty. He also looks a little baffled when he drops
his eyes to Niall, like he honestly has no idea how they got in this situation.

Yeah, Liam is so not sticking around for that. He shuts the door and pulls out his phone as he
walks. Hes not really going anywhere, just trying to put distance between himself and the car. He
tells Louis to meet them back at the car in fifteen, and then sinks to the ground. Hes too far from
the barn and the bonfire, and its dark where he is. Hes happy about that, though, because it
means that no one can see him or come and bother him.

Fifteen minutes later things still do not make sense, and Liam cant keep replaying everything over
in his mind, because its just making things worse. He pushes everything that happened in the last
hour to the back of his mind and tries not to think about it as he heads back to the car.

Niall and Harry are in the backseat, and Louis is in the passenger seat, giggling at something. Or
nothing, possibly, because he looks drunk enough that laughing at nothing is a very likely. Niall
and Harry arent touching anymore, though. In fact, theyre sitting on opposite sides of the car.
Niall is grinning out the window, and Harry is staring down at his hands. Hes not even going to
ask.

Did you tell Zayn we were leaving? Liam asks as he pulls on his seatbelt.

Yeah, Harry answers, not lifting his eyes. He said hed be here.

Liam makes an annoyed sound. If Zayn isnt in the car in five minutes, he can find his own way
home.

Okay, Liam would never do that. But he entertains the thought of leaving Zayn stranded and it
makes him feel a lot better.

Five minutes later someone slams into the side of the car. Liam jumps, and Louis lets out an
indignant squawk as his door opens. Zayn frowns down at him and says, Oh.

You can have the back, Louis says, raising his eyebrows.

Zayn sways a bit and leans heavily on the car, ducking his head down. He meets Liams eyes and
says, Tell him to get in the back, Li. His words are more than a little slurred, and his use of the
old nickname has Liams breath catching in his throat.

Harry groans and opens his door. Liam watches through Louis still open door as Harry grabs
Zayn around the waist and then tugs him into the backseat, doing up his belt for him. Louis slams
his own door with a huff and a slightly hostile look on his face.

Ready, then? Liam asks everyone, managing to sound as cool and calm as he can, though he
doesnt feel it at all.

Zayn leans forward in his seat, and then hot breath is tickling the back of Liams neck. Ready for
what? Zayn asks, lips far too close to Liams skin.

Harry, thankfully, tugs Zayn back into his seat and says, Were good. Lets just get this idiot
home.

Dont be rude, Zayn says, frowning at Harry. Im sure Tomlinsons not a complete idiot.

I was talking about you.

Oh. Are you sure?

Liam ignores them and starts the car. Louis has managed to fall asleep in the time since Zayn
opened his door, and hes leaning against his window, mouth hanging open. Liam turns the car
around and starts down the road theyd followed to get to the barn.

A hand slides over his arm and Liam tenses, nearly driving the car into a ditch, but he straightens
the wheel at the last second as that hand move from his arm to his chest. Liam sucks in a breath
and would throw Zayns hand off him, or glare at him, if he trusted himself to take his eyes off the
road and his hand off the wheel. He has a feeling theyll crash if he does either of those things,
though.

Stop groping our driver, Harry snaps. Honestly, Zayn.

If you knew what he looked like without a shirt on youd be groping him too, Zayn argues.

Liam chances a glance at Niall in the rear view mirror. He looks mildly amused by all of this.

How much did you drink? Harry asks Zayn. When I spoke to you in the barn you seemed
pretty good, and now youre off your ass.

Liam turns off the back road just as Zayn leans forward and says, Do you want to know what
that note said? The one that Morin confiscated? Liam applauds his ability to use the a word like
confiscated while that drunk.

Not really, Liam says tightly.

Or I could give you a demonstration, Zayn adds. When we get home you could come over,
and I could get on my knees, and--,

Harry covers Zayns mouth with his hand. Liam looks over his shoulder and just catches Harrys
shocked, horrified look. Zayn , he says loudly. Fucking stop , Christ. Youre going to regret
this shit in the morning. A pause. Did you just lick me?

Liam turns the radio up so loudly that it wakes Louis, and assures that any further conversations
will be impossible. He keeps it like that until he pulls onto his own street, and then turns it down
so that he doesnt wake his parents up.

Harry has to carry Zayn across the lawn to his house. Zayn is, apparently, unconscious. Liam
watches them go and then herds Louis and Niall into the house, trying to keep them as quiet as
possible.

--

Niall is somehow always fine after a good night of drinking. Louis, on the other hand, is hungover
and pissy the next morning. He groans from Liams bed, where he and Niall had crashed, leaving
Liam to sleep on he floor. Liam pulls his pillow over his head. Hes not ready to be awake yet.

What is that noise ? Louis demands, apparently not on board with Liams plan to sleep until life
stops sucking.

Now that hes pointed it out, Liam cant not pay attention to the music coming in through the
window. Its not that loud, only because the window is closed. He has a feeling that its
spectacularly loud over at Zayns, though, and whatever hes listening to is something angry with
a lot of shouting.

Liam doesnt even move towards the window. Theres no way Zayn will hear his shouts this time.
Instead, he grabs a shirt from his dresser, pulls it on, and stomps downstairs, leaving a groaning
Louis and a snoring Niall behind.
He doesnt even put shoes on. He crosses Zayns lawn in seconds and pounds on the door. A
moment later the door opens, revealing an exhausted, stressed out Harry. He looks almost
vulnerable in a pair of sweatpants and a shirt that is too big, hair a mess from sleep and eyes wide.

I know , Harry says, rubbing a hand over his face. He wont shut it off. Ive been trying to get
him to for the last twenty minutes.

Harry literally has to shout over the music, which is pouring out the door like a physical thing,
making Liams head throb and he didnt even have anything to drink last night. He can only
imagine how Harry feels.

Liam pushes past Harry into the house, who questions what hes doing, but Liam ignores him and
moves up the stairs. Somehow Zayns house is still completely familiar to him, even though its
been years since he was last inside. The walls are painted a different colour, and theres a carpet
covering the stairs now, but the layout is the exact same.

Zayns door is closed but Liam pushes it open and moves into the room without knocking. Zayn is
laying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, hands folded on his stomach. He doesnt hear Liam
come into the room, apparently, because he doesnt react at all. This gives Liam time to locate his
stereo, which is a large, expensive looking thing thats sitting on top of a desk. He examines it,
finds the power button, and turns it off.

Zayn bolts upright, mouth open, and then closes it with a snap when he sees Liam.

Keep. Your music. Down . Liams feet thump against the floor on his way out of the room, and
he slams the door behind himself. He passes by Harry on his way out the front door, only sparing
him a short, There you go.

--

Liams window stays closed and his curtains stay shut for the next week. Zayn doesnt throw him
notes in class, and Liam refuses to look up from his work when he walks in. Not that theyre able
to completely avoid each other, though, because Niall is on a mission to win Harry Styles heart,
apparently. Or something equally ridiculous that involves a lot of time spent sitting at Harrys table
at lunch, which subsequently means sitting at Zayns table at lunch.

Sober Harry, apparently, has no interest in Niall whatsoever. Or so he states on Thursday between
shovelling chips in his mouth. Louis refuses to sit anywhere but their normal table, but Niall had
grabbed Liams arm and dragged him to the other side of the cafeteria, not really giving him a
choice.

It was a one time thing because youre sort of hot and the accent is a turn on, Harry says with a
shrug. I have a strict no jock rule though. Not since--,

Mason, sixth year, Zayn supplies, smirking.

And a no musician rule after--,

Lena, played at the local coffee shop, broke up with you over Chinese takeaway using the
message inside the fortune cookie, Perrie supplies.

And no artists after--,

Ben, someone whose name Liam doesnt know sighs dreamily. Beautiful fingers, too bad he
couldnt keep them out of his roommates ass.

Harry makes an upset sound, but Zayn bursts into a fit of laughter that almost looks painful. His
head tilts back, exposing the line of his throat, and his eyes squeeze closed, crinkling at the sides.
Objectively, Liam has always been aware of Zayns attractiveness. Hes just never really paid
attention to the fact that Zayn is beautiful. Not just gorgeous, or hot, but beautiful, really.

Liam shifts uncomfortably in his seat and Zayn stops laughing when Harry punches him in the
arm hard enough for him to cry out. Fucker, Harry tell him. So, anyways, I dont date. At all.
Too many disasters, too many heartaches. And I especially dont date jocks.

Niall shrugs, sips his drink, twists the cap back on, and says, Neither do I. He grins and pushes
away from the table, taking his snapback off as he goes. He places it on Harrys head and then
walks off across the cafeteria.

Liam scrambles to follow him despite the fact that he still has a half full plate of food. He stands
up but doesnt miss the way Harrys cheeks turn red as he pulls Nialls hat off and twists it around
before arranging it on top of his curls.

I dont get why youre still trying, Liam admits when he finds Niall at his locker, taking a new
snapback out of his bag. Niall has about fifteen of them all together, a majority of which sit on a
shelf in his room.

Niall shrugs and grins at Liam. Course you dont, he says. Youre the most cautious person
Ive ever met, Li. You never throw yourself into things without thinking them through first. But
seriously, if you kissed him youd get why Im not backing down on this one. Plus, its a lot more
fun when it actually takes effort.

Liam really doesnt understand Niall at all, but he lets it go.

--

Its two in the morning, he has school the next day, and the only reason why hes awake is
because something is banging on his window. Liam groans and pulls a pillow over his head,
willing the sound to stop, but it just gets more insistent. If he didnt know that he lived on the
second story, hed swear someone was knocking on his window.

Liam throws the pillow off his head and it knocks his empty cup off his side table. It falls to the
ground and Liams gratefully that hed used a plastic one last night as he swings his legs out of
bed.

He pulls back his curtains, not sure what hes expecting to find, and discovers Zayn hanging out
his own window, arm outstretched, using the end of a broom to knock on Liams. Liam opens his
window and Zayn makes a surprised sound before the broom slips from his fingers and falls to the
ground.

Are you serious right now? Liam hisses. His voice is low and rough with sleep, and hes pretty
sure this is just a really fucked up dream.

Meet me downstairs in ten minutes, Zayn says, a hopeful look on his face instead of the smirk.
Why the fuck would I do that? Liam asks. Hes too tired for this shit, too tired to be civil.

Zayn doesnt answer. He slides his window closed and shuts his curtains, and Liam stands there
for a moment, shivering a bit because of the cold air breezing in from outside, dumbstruck. With a
sigh he shuts his window and climbs back into bed.

He tries to fall back asleep, he really does. Hes awake now, though, and hes too confused and
worked up to get back to sleep. When he rolls over for what feels like the hundredth time and his
blanket slips off his bed in a twisted pile, he gives up and gets out of bed, checking the time. Its
only been six minutes.

He grabs a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie an pulls them on over top of his boxers and t-shirt. He
stands in the middle of the room for a moment, wondering what the hell hes doing. Does he really
want to go see what Zayn wants? After what happened last time? Yes. Yes, a million times yes,
because Liam is apparently a glutton for punishment and he thinks that if theres even the slightest
possibility that Zayn will explain what happened at that stupid party, or that hell get to feel Zayns
lips against his again, he cant pass that up.

Liam quietly pushes open his door, careful not to wake his parents, and then pads down the
darkened hallway. The stairs creak under his weight but that cant really be helped, and he doesnt
really care if he gets caught or not. Hes old enough that his parents wont really be all that upset,
and he could always pretend to just be getting a drink anyways. He doesnt want to wake them
and have to explain, though.

He slips on his shoes at the door and then unlocks the bolt and pulls it open. As he steps outside
he realizes that the sweater is not enough, because the early morning October air seems to cut
through the material of his hoodie.

Its weird being outside at this time of night. He lives in a respectable neighbourhood, the kind
where everyones lights are off by midnight and almost everyone is awake at six for work. The
streetlights are the only brightness, and they cast shadows over the spaces between houses. Its
eerie and silent and Liam doesnt like it.

Zayns front door opens and he comes out in a pair of jeans and his leather jacket, his helmet
already on his head. He has another one tucked under his arm, and he heads straight for his bike,
throws his legs over it, and then waits, head tilted in Liams direction.

Liam sighs and walks over to him and Zayn hands him the helmet but doesnt say anything. Ive
never ridden on a motorcycle, Liam admits, holding the helmet in his hands.

Zayn doesnt answer. He curls his fingers around the clutches and stares straight ahead. Liam
waits another moment, and when Zayn still doesnt do anything else he looks down at the helmet
in his hands. He wasnt lying. Hes never been on one before, and to be completely honest the
idea sort of terrifies him. But then the curiosity outweighs the concern, so he tugs the helmet onto
his head.

The helmet is weirdly confining, fitting snugly on his head. The visor is tinted black and it makes
it seem even darker outside than it already does. Liam puts a hand on Zayns shoulder and swings
a leg over the other side of the bike, and then puts his feet up on the little bar thing so theyre no
longer on the ground, and wraps his arms around Zayns waist the way hes watched Harry do
countless times since Zayn got this dangerous, reckless thing.

The leather of Zayns jacket crinkles as the bike roars to life, and Liam sucks in a panicked breath,
suddenly deciding that this is the worst idea hes ever had in his entire life, and hes definitely
going to die.
Zayn pulls out of the driveway and somehow they dont tip over or crash into his parents car on
their way out. And then theyre speeding down the road, nothing but the air and the sound of the
bikes engine surrounding them. Its horrible and thrilling and nothing at all like riding in a car. In
a car youre safe and caged in. On the motorcycle youre dangerously exposed and free.

Liams fingers curl into Zayns stomach when they turn a corner, and he feels all of his breath
whoosh out of him all at once, and he squeezes his eyes closed as his heart plummets into his
stomach. But theyre fine. Theyre totally fine because Zayn knows what hes doing.

He has no idea where theyre going, but Zayn apparently does. He takes them down the main
street, passing by only the occasional other car. Its just them, the road, and the shops flying past
on all sides. And Liam can see the appeal, he can. Its-- exciting. Different. Fun. But its not
something he could see himself doing every day. It has his stomach in knots and his heart
pounding too much to be healthy.

Liam rests his head on Zayns shoulder and this time closes his eyes because he wants to, not
because hes too terrified to keep them open. He slides one of his hands up a bit and feels Zayns
heartbeat under his palm, steady and rhythmic and beating possibly a bit faster than Liam thinks it
would normally.

They turn again, and Liam clutches at Zayns chest because he feels like hes going to fall, but he
doesnt. When he opens his eyes again he realizes theyre following the same path theyd just
taken, only backwards, and then theyre turning back on their street, Zayns pulling into his own
driveway, and the motorcycle goes silent underneath him.

Liam struggles to get off the bike, legs unsteady, and Zayn is right there, hand on his waist to keep
him up. He keeps it there, too, when Liam reaches up to pull his helmet off, eyebrows drawn
together.

What was the point of that? Liam asks.

Zayn shrugs and tugs the helmet from Liams hands and then walks up the walkway towards his
door, pulls it open, and disappears inside. Liam gapes after him, figuring that Zayn just likes to
fuck with his head. And thinking that he does a really, really good job of it.

--

Theyve got a practise after school, and Liams on his way to the locker room to change into his
uniform when someone grabs the back of his shirt and stops him in his step. Liam turns, ready to
push the person off him, when Harry releases his shirt and takes a step back, a slightly sheepish
look on his face.

Liam pulls his headphones out of his ears as Harry says, Sorry, I called your name twice and you
didnt hear me.

The hallway isnt exactly empty yet, people still milling about and getting things from their
lockers. Harry leans against a set of them and crosses his arm, regarding Liam with a steady gaze.

Its fine, Liam says after a moment. Did you need something?

Harry sighs and runs a hand through his hair again, and then leans forward, shakes it up a bit, and
wipes it off his forehead when he straightens up. Two things, actually, he admits. Ones about
Niall.

Liam moves out of the way as a group of three girls, linked at the arms, come down the hall.
What about Niall? he asks, watching them go.

Harry seems to chew over this question for a while before he finally says, Is he really interested
in me, or is this just some sort of game?

A game, Liam repeats. What do you mean?

I mean like--, Harry waves a hand around. I dont know, a joke. Did someone bet him that he
couldnt get into my pants or something?

I-- what ? Liam asks, because he definitely couldnt have heard right. But Harrys cheeks turn
red and he crosses his arms over his chest, eyes narrowing. Oh, so he really is serious. Nialls not
like that, Liam says slowly. At all. And if you genuinely think hes capable of that, then Ill let
him know not to waste his time anymore.

I was just checking, Harry says defensively. You never know. And its not like he doesnt
have a reputation.

So do you, Liam points out.

Harry grins. Yeah, exactly. Mines pretty accurate and well earned.

Liam tugs at the bottom of his shirt and shifts his feet a bit. Was that it? You just wanted to make
sure that Niall wasnt playing around with you?

No, actually, Harry says, standing up a bit straighter. I also wanted to ask you about Zayn.

Liam takes a step back and racks his brain for a good excuse so he can duck out of the
conversation. He cant find one, unfortunately, and instead ends up just standing there in the
hallway, rooted to the spot.

I just-- I know its not my place to say anything, Harry starts, looking as uncomfortable as Liam
feels, but hes my best mate, you know? And just-- I just want you to know that its not a game
to him, okay? He can act like it is as much as he wants, but its not. You got me?

Not really, Liam admits, completely honest.

Harry sighs and pushes away from the locker. Like-- I cant even explain it because hed skin me
alive and turn me into a throw rug, but-- just-- if youre not interested in him, dont fuck around
with him. After last time-- I--, He cuts off abruptly and shakes his head. Just dont fuck him over
again, Liam, okay?

And then he walks off, leaving Liam alone in a hallway thats not nearly as empty as he feels.

Hes never felt so out of focus before practise as he does when he gets into the locker room. He
has no bloody idea what Harry was talking about. Last time? When did he fuck Zayn over?
Because from where Liam was sitting, Zayn was the one who cut all ties from him without
warning. Zayn was the one who stopped being his friend without any explanation at all.

When they head out to the field, Niall jogging along behind him, Liam spots Zayn and Harry in
the bleachers, Zayn leaning back, head ducked, while Harry talks animatedly at him, and that just
adds to Liams inability to focus.
Think hes here for me? Niall asks, grinning and eyeing Harry.

Probably, Liam mumbles, eyes on the other side of the field as he starts running, doing his two
laps before practise. He feels Zayns eyes on him the entire time.

--

It sort of becomes this weird, slightly awkward thing, their lunches. Harry and Zayns friends are
weird at first, eying Niall and Liam distrustfully, and conversation is tense at best. But then, as the
days progress and Niall refuses to eat lunch anywhere but at Harrys side, they settle into normal,
comfortable conversation, extending it to Niall occasionally. Never to Liam, but thats because
Liam spends the whole hour pushing his food around on his plate and pointedly not looking up at
Zayn.

Niall, on the other hand, spends the whole period shamelessly flirting with Harry, who rolls his
eyes and snorts but then ends up wearing one of Nialls snapbacks for the rest of the day anyways,
a sunny smile on his face when he pulls it on over his curls. And slowly, over the course of two
weeks, Harry stops throwing Nialls arm off his shoulder and starts leaning into his side and
laughing when Niall says something ridiculous or stupid. And Louis starts sitting with them, too.

Im taking Harry out after the game, Niall says in History on the first Monday of November.

Liam looks up at him, eyebrows raised. Louis literally drops his pencil on his desk. On a date ?
he asks.

On a date, Niall confirms.

You dont date, Liam says, frowning.

Ever, Louis adds.

Niall shrugs. I dont. But--,

Oh, fucking Christ, Louis moans. The curly haired giant has you wrapped around his finger,
doesnt he?

Niall doesnt look upset by this. Have you seen his lips? Niall asks. And were into the same
music and shit. I dont know. He just doesnt give a fuck, you know, and its refreshing. Hes not,
like, clingy or needy or anything. Its just-- good.

Huh, Liam says, honestly shocked.

Anyways, Niall says, shaking his head. He tugs off his hat, runs a hand through his hair, and
then returns it to his head. I wanted to know if I could borrow your car for a few hours. Just from
after the game until, like, nine. Thats it. I swear to god I wont crash it, and Ill owe you for life.

Liam shrugs. Sure.

Please? Niall begs. Ill -- wait, seriously?

Liam nods. Im too shocked at your decision to actually go on a date to say no.
Youre a fucking brilliant friend, you know that? Niall says, punching his arm. I owe you one.
Seriously.

Liam snorts and holds his keys out to Niall. Niall goes to grab them but Liam holds them out of
reach for a moment. No fucking in my backseat. I swear to God, Niall, I will kill you.

Promise, Niall says immediately, reaching for the keys again.

And dont touch my CDs, either, he adds.

I wont.

And no eating Italian because you get pasta sauce all over everything.

I wont , Niall says, exasperated. You going to give me the keys or do you want to hire a
lawyer first and have me sign paperwork?

Liam relents and hands over the keys.

Again, Zayn and Harry are in the bleachers, and Louis is sitting with them. Liam doesnt think
about that because hes got a game to win.

And, of course, they do. Liam comes out as the top scorer on their team, and people in the stands
cheer. Liam grins as his team mates slap his back and Niall pulls him into a headlock and rubs his
knuckles against the short bristles of Liams hair.

I still dont get rugby, Louis says, coming over to them with Harry and Zayn in tow.

Whats there to get? Niall demands. He lifts his shirt to wipe sweat off his forehead. We were
fucking awesome out there.

Liam was awesome, Harry corrects. You were average.

Average, Niall repeats, raising his eyebrows playfully. I promise you that I perform better in
the bedroom than I do on the field.

Harry snorts and rolls his eyes, but the fact that Nialls red snapback is on his head sort of
subtracts from the barely amused look on his face, proving that hes not as above Nialls antics as
he pretends to be, or would like to be. Are we going out or not? he asks.

Yeah, just let me shower and change, Niall says. Ive got Liams car for the night.

Need me to drive you home? Louis asks.

Nah, Ive got it, Zayn cuts in. Liam and Louis both frown at him and he shrugs, expression
blank. Were going to the same place anyways, and Ive got my extra helmet with me because I
drove Harry this morning.

You okay with that? Louis asks.

Liam shrugs. Sure, he says, though hes really not. Zayns barely spoken ten words to him in
the last few weeks, despite the fact that they spend an hour together every day at lunch. After that
night when they went for a drive, Zayns barely acknowledged Liams existence.

Ill wait for you in the lot, Zayn tells him.

Have fun with that, Niall chuckles. Liam refuses to use public showers.
Zayn shrugs and says, I like him sweaty anyways.

Thats disgusting, Louis says, wrinkling his nose. Why is everyone pairing up? Oh, god, Im
the fifth wheel. I refuse to be the fifth wheel. Fuck you all. Im picking up a tub of ice cream on
my way home.

Louis stomps away from them and Niall laughs at his back, but Liam blushes, hoping that the
colour in his cheeks can be blamed on the game hed just played. Im going to go change, Liam
says abruptly. He turns on the spot, not waiting for Niall to come with him, and heads for the
locker room.

He considers sucking it up and just showering in the school showers, but he cant bring himself to
do it. Instead he changes into clean clothes, splashes water on his face, and uses liberal amounts of
deodorant. He sniffs himself, doesnt smell anything off, even if hes still slightly sweaty. Niall
laughs at him for this, but Liam just flips him off.

Think Lou was serious, though? Niall asks as Liam passes him his bag. Niall will leave it in the
car when he drops it off, that way Liam can wash his uniform tonight. About the pairing up
thing. I mean-- Zayn being into you.

No, Liam answers, averting his eyes. Hes not. Zayn just likes to play with my head.

Nialls expression softens a bit. If you want I can drop you off at home before Harry and I go
out. If you really dont want to get a ride from him, I mean. I know that you two dont really get
along after that shit when you were younger.

Dont worry about it, Ill be fine, Liam assures him. I stopped caring about that stuff a long
time ago.

You sure?

Positive, Liam lies.

Niall grins at him and slaps his back. Liam wishes him good luck on his date, which Niall says he
definitely doesnt need, and then heads out the doors. His palms are sweating and his mind is
whirling as he pushes open the front doors and spots Zayn.

Its really, really not fair. Hes leaning against his motorcycle, cigarette dangling from his
fingertips (one day hes going to get caught smoking on school property, Liams sure), head
ducked a bit. His hair isnt in his quiff today so it lays over his forehead, and with his leather
jacket he is literally every bad boy fantasy come to life. Its fucking ridiculous, is what it is.

Liam walks over to him and Zayn looks up, lips tilted up a ghost of his normal grin. He drops his
cigarette to the ground and steps on it before grabbing his helmet and tugging it on, passing
Liams to him right afterwards. This time Liam is slightly less hesitant as he pulls on the helmet
and then climbs in behind Zayn.

He sees a few people look their way as Zayn starts the bike, and he wonders what theyre
thinking. He wonders if anyone thinks its weird that its him on the back of Zayns bike, arms
wrapped around his waist, head tucked onto his shoulder. If anyone wonders what caused this, or
if anyone even cares. But he decides that he, personally, doesnt care at all.

Hold on, Zayn orders over the roaring of the bike.

What do you think Im doing? Liam answers with an indignant snort.

Zayn chuckles and reverses the bike and then drives slowly out of the lot before turning onto the
road. Liam holds on, probably much tighter than he needs to.

Liams driven to and from school for the past two years. He knows every route and shortcut.
Knows what roads to take when the main one was off for construction. Zayn is not taking any of
those routes.

Where are we going? Liam shouts when theyre at a set of lights. Theyre behind a van, and
Liam doesnt like this as much as he did driving on the empty road. Theres too many cars, and
the motorcycle stops differently than his car does. Much more abruptly. It freaks him out.

Zayn doesnt answer and Liam squeezes his arms around him a bit more as the light changes
colour and they start moving again. There are two roads out of town, and Zayn takes the other
one, on the opposite side of town from the one theyd taken when theyd went to the party. He
picks up speed out here until the trees are literally flying by and Liams heart is in his throat.

Zayn hunches his shoulders down the faster they go, and when the road curves a bit he lets out a
loud whoop that has Liam grinning in spite of the terror inside of him. Eventually Zayn slows
down a bit as they come up to a familiar turn, one Liam hasnt taken in years. It leads uphill,
winding, and if Liam wasnt already terrified, he is now.

Theres only a small railing on the side of the road here, and the drive has always freaked him out.
That was in a car. Now, on the back of the motorcycle, its a hundred times worse. Liam closes
his eyes and prays that, if Zayn does manage to kill them, its fast and painless.

Liam doesnt open his eyes again until theyve stopped. When he does he spots the familiar picnic
table, the impossibly large and old tree with the drooping branches that hed climbed a hundred
times, and the edge of the cliff that gives you a view of their entire city in the distance, nothing but
dark smudges for houses and pinpricks of light for streetlamps.

Zayn parks the bike and Liam gets off it, pulling off the helmet. He places it on the seat and looks
around, arms wrapped around his stomach.

Why are we here? Liam asks softly.

Zayn pulls a pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket and tugs one out, lighting it before he
shoves the pack and the lighter back into his pocket. He takes a drag and exhales before
shrugging. I dont know. I just wanted to come here.

Liam sighs and walks over to the picnic table. He sinks down and looks down at the old, weather
worn wood. In the corner is his own name scratched into it, something that Zayn had done during
the many, many times their families had come up here during the summer when they were
younger. Zayns mum would make sandwiches, Liams dad would bake his double chocolate
cookies, and he and Zayn would spend hours climbing that stupid tree until they got too high, and
their mothers shrieked at them to come down.

Zayn sits down beside him, enveloping Liam in the smell of smoke and, underneath that, the smell
of his spicy but somewhat sweet cologne that makes Liam want to inhale deeply.

I come up here a lot, Zayn admits.

Its obvious that he does, now that hes said it. Theres more engravings on the wood than Liam
remembers, and theres also a good smattering of cigarette butts on the ground, as well as empty
beer cans scattered about, like someone had kicked them away to make the place look slightly less
trashy.
You and Harry, Liam guesses.

Yeah, Zayn admits. He taps his fingers against the wood, eyes lowered to it. Most of the time.

Liam shifts a bit and his shoulder bumps against Zayns before he jerks away, as if touching Zayn
burned him. I just dont get what happened, Liam admits quietly. Why-- why I came back that
summer and you were just gone . You wanted nothing to do with me.

Zayn snorts and says, It wasnt after you left, Liam. It was before that. But I didnt start hanging
out with Harry until you were gone, so you didnt notice it until then.

Liam frowns but Zayn is pushing away from the table, cutting off any questions that had started to
form in Liams mind. He paces around the table, bringing his cigarette to his lips almost as soon as
he blows out the smoke from the pervious inhale.

What was her name? Zayn asks, not looking at Liam. Jessica, was it?

Liam swallows. He gets where Zayn is going now, he just doesnt see what it has to do with them.
Jenna, he corrects.

Right, Jenna, Zayn says. He grins and shakes his head, but its not a happy grin. And you were
just so-- perfectly fucking normal, Liam. You liked girls. And that was -- that was great. Really. I
didnt resent you for that. It was myself that I couldnt deal with, because I was the fucked up one,
right? I mean, I was the one who fell in love with his best friend who was a guy, and you never
even noticed. Never noticed the way I looked at you, or felt for you.

Liams eyes widen and his breath catching in his throat. Zayn, you --,

And I was just freaking out internally, right, Zayn rants, and its like Liams not even there.
Hes just talking to himself now. Like, I was having a total fucking crisis, and all I wanted was to
be able to tell you, because you were always there. You always fixed things, because thats what
you do, Liam, but I couldnt fucking tell you , not without ruining everything. And then you left
that summer, and I met Harry down at the skate park, and he was different. And he just-- he got
it , you know? I never even had to tell him, he just knew, and you never did.

Liams trying to follow what Zayns saying, he really is, but its not making any sense, because a
world where Zayn was in love with him just doesnt make sense at all. Zayn left him . Zayn was
the one who wanted nothing to do with him . If he were truly in love with Liam, he never would
have done that.

Liam voices that now, saying, If you really did you would have given me an explanation, Zayn.
Do you know how much it fucking hurt to have you just blow me off? To not talk to me
anymore? To see you hanging out with new people like we didnt even know each other?

Zayn tosses his cigarette to the ground and grinds it into the dirt with the toe of his shoe. It was
easier to break things off myself than to let you do it down the line, when you figured it out.

Who said I would have? Liam demands, anger rushing up inside of him. You never gave me a
chance.

Because I didnt think there was one! Zayn snaps. Look at you! Youve grown up into this
perfect boy next door, Liam. Youre the schools star athlete. Youre arguable one of the most
popular guys in school. You arrive early to class and raise your hand before you answer questions.
Youre polite and well behaved and, like, fucking perfect. And Im the exact opposite of that.
I dont see what that has to do with anything, Liam says, standing up because he doesnt like the
fact that Zayn is the one standing and dominating the conversation. It makes him feel vulnerable.
All you do is confuse me, and I really cant tell if youre just doing this to fuck with my head or
not.

Oh, thats what it started as, Zayn says, stopping his pacing. He fixes Liam with a cold look. I
just liked screwing with you, because you get all flustered and you blush and shit like that, and it
was fun. And I thought it was just because youre, you know, you . I didnt think it was because
you were actually interested . And then at that stupid fucking party you had to go and ruin
everything by kissing me back.

Im still lost, Liam says softly.

Zayn sighs and moves towards him, and then he grabs Liam roughly by the sides of his face and
crushes their lips together. Its almost painful. The picnic table digs into his back and his teeth cut
into his lips, but Zayns hands are soft but calloused and warm, and his lips are dry but full and
perfect. Liam fists his hands in the front of Zayns shirt, pulling him closer as a low sound rips
from his throat, one that is equal parts aggressive and desperate.

Zayn pulls back, eyes wide and dazed, and steps away from Liam. See? That fucks with
my head, because it doesnt make sense .

What doesnt make sense? Liam asks, exasperated. He feels like theyre getting nowhere. Zayn
keeps talking, trying to explain, and it just makes things even more complicated and confusing.

You liking me, Zayn says, like its obvious. Or wanting me. It doesnt-- it doesnt make any
fucking sense, Liam.

Join the club, Liam spits. Youve been nothing but an asshole to me for years, so it really
doesnt make sense to me, either.

God! Zayn shouts, tilting his head to the sky. Why is this so fucking difficult?!

Because youre making it difficult, Liam says angrily.

You know what? Zayn bites out. Just-- forget I said anything. Forget it. This whole thing was
just a stupid idea anyways.

What whole thing? Liam asks, bewildered.

Bringing you up here, still caring about you, it was just stupid, Zayn tells him. I thought that I
could just erase time and get us back to two people who actually knew each other, but I cant do
that, and we dont, and this is just pointless.

Liam leans heavily on the table, wood biting into his hands. Pointless, he repeats. Youre right.
This whole thing is pointless. Take me home.

What? Zayn asks, head snapping up.

Take me home, Liam repeats more forcefully. Im done here. Id like to go home, and I cant
do that unless you take me because youre the one who drove us all the way out here.

Zayns expression goes from livid to carefully blank in the blink of an eye, and he stalks off
towards his motorcycle. He pulls on his helmet, climbs onto the bike, and sits there, back rigid.
Liam takes a slow breath and then follows him, doing the same.
This time he keeps his eyes open the whole way, even when the winding road makes his stomach
sick and Zayns warmth under his hands makes him want to cry because he might be warm to the
touch, but Zayn is actually cold and closed off to him.

They dont talk when they get home. Liam shucks off the helmet, throws it at Zayn who catches it
easily, and then he stomps towards his house, not looking back once.

Were you out with Zayn? his mum asks when he gets inside.

Liam pauses in the hallway, considers lying, and figures shed seen them out the window. Yes,
he admits.

His mum smiles fondly. Im glad, she says. You two used to be so close. I think its nice that
youre rekindling that friendship.

Liam lets out a laugh that sounds like a sob and climbs the stairs, ignoring his mum calling after
him. He shuts his door, makes sure his window and curtains are closed, and then falls onto his
bed. He stares up at the ceiling for a long, long time, until the light outside the window gets
dimmer, and his room is cast into shadows that seem fitting, given his mood.

His bedroom door opens without warning and Niall comes in, grinning brightly. His cheeks are
flushed and he looks positively radiant.

Thanks, he says, tossing his keys to Liam.

Your date went well, then, Liam guesses.

Niall nods and sinks onto the edge of Liams bed. Better than well, he says. We got kicked out
of the movies, and then we made out in the back of your car until some old lady knocked on the
window and told us to get out of there before she called the police.

Liam smiles weakly at him, wishing he could share Nialls bright mood. Niall must see through it,
though, because he says, Whats wrong?

Liam shrugs. Nothing worth talking about.

Does it have to do with Zayn?

Why would it have anything to do with Zayn? Liam asks, scoffing.

Niall tilts his head to the side, examining Liam, and says, Because youve sort of been in love
with him since we were, like, thirteen, and now hes suddenly hanging out with us all the time,
and thats got to fuck with your head a bit, you know?

Im not, Liam gasps out. But-- it does. But Im not. In love with him, I mean. Im not.

Niall snorts. Sure thing, Li, he says. If you want to deny it, thats cool. But you want to drive
me home?

Yeah, Liam says, nodding. He gets up and they head outside. His mind is still whirling over
Nialls claim that Liams been into Zayn for years keeping him from starting up a conversation.

When they get to Nialls house, Niall puts his hand on the door but doesnt get out. Call me if
you need to talk, yeah?

Liam snorts. Obviously.

Seriously, Liam, he says quietly.

Okay, Liam agrees. Ill see you tomorrow.

Niall nods and gets out of the car, calling, See you tomorrow! over his shoulder.

Liam sighs and waits until hes inside to pull away from the house. When he gets back to his
neighbourhood he notices that Zayns motorcycle is not parked in his lot. He tells himself he
doesnt care where Zayn went. That he doesnt care what Zayn does, because Zayn is not his
friend, or his boyfriend, or anything to him anymore, and that was Zayns choice .

Later that night, after hes fallen asleep, too exhausted by the entire day to stay up any later, he
hears Zayns motorcycle coming down the street. He looks over at his alarm clock, reading the
flashing 2:17am and rolls over, trying to get back to sleep. Minutes later the sound of something
hitting his window has him blinking open his eyes again, but he ignores it and, not longer after,
Zayn stops trying to get his attention.

--

Niall and Louis sit at Harrys table at lunch. Liam sits at their old table, not really paying attention
to the conversations going on around him. He could care less about the party Jordans throwing on
Friday, or about the game they have the following week against their rival school. He couldnt
care less about any of it, really.

The next day in English a piece of folded paper lands on his desk. Liam lifts his eyes to Zayn,
whos got the end of his pen in his mouth and is smiling almost hesitantly around it, a slight flush
in his cheeks. Liam unfolds the page and scans the words.

Im sorry , is all it reads. Liam scrunches up the paper in his hand and makes a show of walking to
the front of the room and tossing it in the garbage.

The next day another note falls right off his desk. Niall gives him a curious look but Liam shakes
his head and reaches down to grab it.

If I could find the words to convince you of how I feel, Id ink them into my skin and wear them
proudly until you believed me.

Liam snorts loudly and rolls his eyes before. Unlike yesterday he shoves the letter into his pocket
instead, because he cant make himself throw this one out for some reason. He still sees the hurt
look flash across Zayns face when he meets his eyes for a short moment, but Liam just returns his
gaze to the front of the class and ignores him.

Could you stop throwing notes at me in class? Liam hisses on his way out the door.

Zayn frowns and then smirks and shakes his head. Not when you blush so pretty when I do.

I thought you said this was all pointless, Liam snaps. And leave me alone.

To stop wanting you would be to deny the biggest part of myself . The letter is carefully folded into
the shape of a heart, and this is getting really fucking ridiculous. And Liams, like, 90% sure that
Zayn made Harry fold it for him, because Harry keeps wrinkling his nose at Zayn and laughing at
him, and Zayn keeps shrugging and trying to catch Liams eye.
Id like to break you apart with my tongue and put you back together, piece by piece, with nothing
but my lips . Niall reads this one over his shoulder and snots loud enough that people look over at
them.

That is some cheesy shit, Niall says.

Its ridiculous, Liam answers, glaring at Zayn as he refolds the note and tucks it into his pocket.

Liam flips Zayn off when the other boy turns in his seat.

I know its hard to remember the people we used to be; its even harder to picture that youre not
here next to me.

After class Liam slams the paper down on Zayns desk and says, Those are Maroon 5 lyrics.

Zayn grins up at him, but Liam shakes his head, not returning it. Just stop, Zayn, honestly.

Zayns smiles drops and he stomps out of the room. Harry gives Liam a disappointed look and
leaves with Nialls arm around his shoulders.

Im sorry for waiting too long to tell you. Im sorry for never giving you an explanation. Im sorry
for wasting so much time holding things back when I could have been holding you instead. Im
sorry that its so much easier for me to write you shitty poetry on pieces of scrap paper then to tell
you these things face to face, and Im sorry that I broke things irreparably.

Im sorry that these seven letters do little to make up for it. And Ill leave you alone.

Liam leaves class with the note in his hands.

--

Liam comes home after winning one of their biggest games. Niall had cheered and ran towards the
benches, throwing himself at Harry, who had struggled to catch him. Zayn had been sitting beside
him the whole time, eyes on Liam, and Liam had just turned and headed to the locker room, not
wanting to celebrate.

When he gets home he heads upstairs, going straight for his towel hanging off the back of his
computer chair. Instead he pulls open the drawer of the desk, takes out a few slips of paper, the
black permanent marker, and the roll of tape. He tugs off the lid of the marker and presses it to the
page, spanning the message out over four of them, and then gather up the pages and moves
towards the window.

Hes not like Zayn. He doesnt know how to take thoughts and emotions and form them into
words, so the message is lame and not enough, but he cant help that as he tapes it up onto his
window, hoping that Zayn will be able to read it from his own.

When he hears Zayns motorcycle in the driveway he gets up and moves towards his window and
peers out the edges of the paper. A few moments later Zayns window opens and he stares at the
message written on Liams. He meets Liams eyes shortly and then slams his window closed,
curtains closing too.

Liam sighs and realizes that maybe hed been too late, until he sees Zayn in his backyard,
struggling to climb over the fence. When they were younger there was a hole in that fence, and on
the weekends one of them would sneak into the others yard through it and break into the others
house through the backdoor so they could wake each other up.

Liam turns and waits until his bedroom door opens. Zayn closes it softly behind himself and
crosses his arms over his chest. Im sort of in love with you, he quotes Thats the best you
got, Payne?

Liam shrugs. Maybe.

Zayns lips twitch upwards, but he says, Im not trying to fuck with your head, okay?

But youre still doing a pretty good job of it, Liam tells him.

You fuck with mine too, Zayn argues. Liam snorts. Its just -- we dont really fit, you know. It
wont-- it cant work. Not anymore. Maybe before but-- were different now, you know?

I sort of like different, Liam says quietly.

I sort of like you, Zayn counters.

I sort of love you.

Zayn crosses the room and crowds Liam up against his window. Its cold against his back, damp
condensation soaking through his t-shirt. Youre ridiculous, Zayn tells him.

I could say the same thing about you, Liam retorts.

Zayn snorts and then kisses him, gently, hesitantly. Liam kisses him back much more roughly, like
hes trying to see how much pressure he can apply until Zayn snaps. Its not much, apparently,
because Zayns fingers dig into his waist and he makes a quiet, needy sound, and thats all the
incentive Liam needs to push his tongue against Zayns lips, asking for more. They part almost
immediately, giving it to him, and Liam wonders if they could have been doing this for years if
theyd both just owned up to how they felt. If theyd tried instead of letting it slip away from them.

Since I was twelve, Zayn says against his lips. And it never went away. And you just kept
getting hotter and hotter and it drove me insane, do you know that? I mean, honestly, Liam, youre
really fucking fit, and I sort of resent you for it.

Coming from the guy who wears leather jackets and smokes, Liam says against his lips, pushing
Zayn backwards. Fuck, were you trying to kill me? Because you were doing a pretty good job of
it. And then changing with the curtains open all the time. I felt like a creep but I couldnt stop
looking anyways.

I wanted you to, Zayn murmurs, ducking his head into the crook of Liams neck as Liam guides
them backwards.

Ridiculous, Liam says against his skin. Youre completely ridiculous.

Im okay with that if you are, Zayn says, legs hitting the back of the bed.

I dont know, Liam teases.

Zayn falls onto the bed, tugging Liam down with him. He scoots farther up, and Liam straddles
his hips. Zayns hands slid up his back under his shirt, and his nails scratch against his skin as they
slide back down before he bunches the shirt up, trying to get it off.
Liam sits up and pulls it off, and Zayn groans loudly. Remember that note that Morin
confiscated? Zayn asks suddenly, eyes wide. They slide up Liams body to his eyes and Liam
shivers. I could show you what it said.

Liam feels goosebumps break out over his skin under Zayns touch and his intense look. Fuck,
are you trying to ruin me? he asks, mind whirling with possibilities of what that note could have
possibly said.

Yes, Zayn answers honestly. He smirks up at Liam, and Liam decides that, yeah, hes sort of in
love with that smirk, and hes okay with that.

Karen sips her coffee, phone pressed to her ear. They just left.

I know, I heard Liams car pull out of the lot, Trisha replies with a snort. At least yours
doesnt drive a bloody motorcycle. Gives me a heart attack every time he gets on it.

Liams rather fond of it, too, Karen admits. They think theyre being sneaky, creeping out of
the house in the middle of the night and getting on that thing. As if the sound of it doesnt wake the
whole neighbourhood.

Boys, Trisha tsks.

They always will be, wont they?

Hopefully, Trisha says fondly. Though I must admit, I miss when theyd sneak into each
others rooms to watch Batman. Now they do it to fool around, which I've had to give Zayn
numerous lectures about.

Their sons are a bit ridiculous, but Karens just happy that theyre close again.

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